Normally I don't like song-fics. But I felt that this song fit perfectly so, here we go.
Disclaimer- I don't own any of this at all. Not the song or the books.
Cold As You.
You have a way of coming easily to me.
And when you take you take the very best of me.
Why? Why did he do this to me? I had tried my best and nothing had come of it. Did he not understand that I loved him and that I had always loved him and I would never love anyone but him?
Well, he need to start understanding, because these feelings were slipping, slipping out of my fingers and into nothing.
I didn't feel anything anymore. I couldn't, he wouldn't let me.
So I start a fight, cause I need to feel something.
And you do what you want, cause I'm not what you wanted.
I just couldn't believe that after all I had wanted and need and given him, he would leave me for her and not have the decency to tell me at least that I was not who he loved.
I yelled, and yelled at him, and I still couldn't feel my heart. Why, why, why. I wondered. Why don't you love me? Why can't you see that after all we've been through after all that I've been through we were meant for each other?
Can't you feel it?
Apparently not because when I finish screaming you calmly tell me that NO, you don't love me, and NO, you have never and will never love me.
And I cry.
Oh, what a shame.
What a rainy ending giving to a perfect day.
Just walk away, ain't no use defending words that you will never say.
Your entire family hates me now, because I won't forgive you. Because I won't come to any family gatherings. Because all I do now is wallow in my sorrow. That you left me. And at a time like this.
I find out that she's pregnant with your baby. Your whole world is happy and so is your family. They want me to come to the baby shower. They try to explain why you did what you did, and why it's okay.
I don't understand how they can forgive you for ruining my life.
Did you ever consider my feelings for you I wonder? Because it sure as hell seems like you didn't.
And now that I'm here thinking it through.
I've never been anywhere as cold as you.
I start to get sick. My only friend takes me to the hospital. Wondering what wrong with me. That's when I decide that this has to stop. My life can't revolve around you. I won't let it.
I feel better than ever for a few weeks than start to get sick again. Why am I sick you ask?
I have no idea. I go to the doctor. And that's when it hits me. Now I can't forget about you. Now I will never forget about you because now you have ruined my life in more than a million ways. The worst thing though?
You don't even know it.
You put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray.
And I stood there loving you and wished them away.
And you come away with a great little story.
Of a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you.
As I stand outside your flat door, and remember all the times we stood there and you told me that you loved me. Was that all a lie? Did you not love me even then?
Did you lie to me even then? I hear you from the outside ready to push the doorbell, and freeze. I hear my name coming from your lips. And then I hear laughter. I hear you and your lover laughing over how much I loved you, and how much you led me on.
I remember all the times I helped you and all the times I wanted you to help me and you never did. I don't think I had ever hated someone so much. I turned around quickly ready to leave, and puked.
Then I remembered why I was here. And I turned back around and raised my hand to knock- and changed my mind. You didn't deserve to know about this. It was my dirty little secret and it was going to stay that way. So I turned stepped over my puke and walked away.
Oh, what a shame.
What a rainy ending giving to a perfect day.
Just walk away, ain't no use defending words that you will never say.
And now that I'm here thinking it through.
I've never been anywhere as cold as you.
I know now that I have never hated anyone as much as him. And I never will. I also know that it is time to give up on all my hopes and dreams that this wasn't true that it was all a dream.
I need to move on and do something with my life. So I found a pencil and a piece of paper.
Dear Ronald,
You never did give a damn thing honey,
But I cried, cried for you.
We are having a baby.
Correction, I am having a baby.
And I know you wouldn't have told nobody,
If I died, died, for you.
So, I'm telling you now that I'm leaving the country.
Harry knows, and that's it. I'm naming the child, Ginny because it's a girl,
And I will need a reminder of my old life once I start my new one.
I hate you. Don't bother looking for me.
-Moine
Oh, what a shame what a shame what a rainy ending give to a perfect day. Oh.
Every smile you fake is so condescending, counting all the scars you made.
Now that I'm sitting here thinking it through I've never been anywhere as cold as you.
_Thank you for reading. I'm actually really proud of this now that I'm done so…please check out my other stories and homepage! .