Demigods & Gods Read Mean Tweets

~My First Fanfiction Story~

#PJO. Can the demigods and gods alike survive the harsh reality of the online world? Can they do so without maiming, zapping, incinerating, or sending the poor mortals or any souls to Tartarus? Inspired by: my boredom and interest in writing AND Jimmy Kimmel's Mean Tweets episodes.

SLIGHT TWIST: Let's just say (not going into too much detail and story) that the mortals somehow KNEW about the world of Percy Jackson and the Olympians, and all the mortals in the world has fully believed in Greek mythology from the beginning of time. The gods and demigods also know about the mortals knowing they exist. Guys, this is my first Fanfiction story so please be patient and considerate if my story seems a bit "meh" to you. Made this for fun & wanted to always imagine the characters reading mean tweets about themselves ^u^

~NC

Chapter 1: Percy Jackson

"Er… So why, uh exactly have I been summoned here?"

"Good question! Apollo, may you do the awesome honor of answering?"

"It would be my awesome pleasure, Hermes!"

The god of light and music explained to the confused demigod what had happened and why he had been summoned. Said demigod had been practicing his archery skills one afternoon, when suddenly, a bright light had surrounded him, blinding him temporarily and faltering his senses, his body dropping like a sack filled with meat and potatoes. Upon waking up, he saw Apollo and Hermes sitting in two stools in front of him, arms crossed and a pair of trademark smirks of mischief planted on their faces. In between them, a tripod-mounted camera was aimed directly into Percy's face. Looking around to check his surroundings, Percy indeed had been summoned… but not at Olympus. Instead, the three were in a bricked-wall room no bigger than his bedroom at his mum and stepfather's house. The room was vacant, except for the three of them, a couple of flower vases in two of the corners of the room, and the camera. As Apollo finished to briefly explain, Percy slowly sat up.

"Sooo… you guys want me to read the mean tweets on the Internet, right?" The green-eyed demigod asked as he arched an eyebrow.

Hermes replied, "Yeah, yeah! We want you to read the mean tweets those mortals tweeted about you and we want to-"

"Figure out how you would react, and what your thoughts are," Apollo finished excitedly with a grin. "Ah, gotta love the joy and wonder of Twitter! Especially when it comes to mortals' mean tweets!" Apollo said.

"Oooh, I bet there are also mean tweets about Titans!" Hermes piped in. "How cool would that be?"

"Ya got that right! Hey, why don't I make up a haiku for them?"

"Well on second thought, nevermind." Hermes rather rushed the last part, obviously wanting to avoid Apollo's haikus.

Apollo pouted and crossed his arms, knowing full well how Hermes hated his haikus despite the false look of nostalgia Hermes gives whenever the sun god recites his haikus. "Fine. You've always hated my haikus anyways. Hey, where's George and Martha?"

"Oh, I didn't bring them," Hermes said with a chuckle. "Thought they might be really distracting if they actually came with me. Actually, they have nine-thousand more e-mails for me in their junk and two-hundred and six new messages from Boreas, Nemesis, Hecate…"

As the two gods were conversing, Percy thought about the Internet. He had heard of the Internet and all the stuff that were in it, and how mortals would use websites to communicate with others from afar or to play 3D FPS games that he's been longing to try, but he never familiarized himself with it so much. Of course, being a demigod and all, and not being particularly interested in social media or any of the craze he had heard from his old mortal friends and a few campers, he wouldn't know much about the Internet.
Now that he thought about it, his apartment back in Upper Manhattan didn't have Internet either, so it was all a new experience for him (it's not like he even demanded for it in the first place; it's only his mum who goes to the Internet café down the block every now and then.) Yes, a teenager without an Internet, let alone who doesn't know anything about the Internet-how sad and tragic is that? That's the life one gets when one's a demigod. But this unknowingness made the son of Poseidon curious and wondrous, and he thought to himself that this Twitter site is merely a small matter. It won't matter what some stupid mortal might say about him, especially if the demigod's been fighting monsters, gods, and heck even Titans for what… Three, four years? And soon counting! Heck, he should just get on with it! He's Percy Jackson for crying out loud! But if only Annabeth was here with him, he thought.

Sea-green eyes lifted gaze upon the two Olympians who just finished talking and were staring at him intently. "Okay," the demigod finally said. "I'll do whatever stupid thing you guys have in store for me."

"Cool!" Apollo and Hermes said in unison, to which they countered with a hi-five with each other, nearly knocking over the camera in between them.

Apollo then ordered Percy to take a seat. When Percy turned around, he noticed there was no seat. In response, Hermes simply snapped his fingers, and a black lounge chair with fresh lacquer armrests and a cup holder appeared out of thin air.

Percy took his seat facing the two gods and their camera. Great. Just great, he thought. Probably another one of their silly pranks. Annabeth will definitely barrage me with questions later.

Just as he sat, the Mist made him somehow already hold a phone on his right hand. It was a golden-colored Samsung Galaxy S3 with a small red Maserati car design at the back and a sticker name of Apollo in Greek at the sides. The gleam of the phone was melting the light off of Percy's eyes, so he had to turn the phone facing the screen. And if the phone wasn't enough, a golden chalice fully filled with blue Coke had just magically appeared on the cupholder beside him, to which Percy's eyes widened for a moment, then chugged at it viciously before proceeding. He burped. Refreshing.

"Sooo, am I being broadcasted live or what?"

Hermes said, "Oh, don't you worry Percy! We're not broadcasting this camera live on Hephaestus TV, nor are we planning on showing this to anyone else. It's just… just for our own fun and sake, y'know?"

"Yeah, don't worry Perseus. It's all fun in games," the sun god said.

"Well then, guess I shouldn't be worried. Here it goes-" Percy lifted the phone.

Suddenly, Hermes had cut him short, "Warning: we do not take responsibility for any personal feelings that will affect your character negatively, such as hatred, sadness, anger, bitterness, and other such negative emotions, thoughts, or self-destruction on one's ego. We furthermore do not take responsibility for the maiming, killing, torturing, zapping, or splashing of mortals, other gods, or demigods, or even us, and we recommend you not to. Please leave the fighting unless there are monsters or any imminent threats nearby. Swear words and shocked faces may be ensued and tolerated, as long as it's not extreme, but will be bleeped out by the recorder. People, this is rated T for Teens. Personal video discretion is advised." Hermes spoke fast in his best infomercial-like voice before grinning and flashing his thumbs up.

Percy looked at him skeptically.

"Whaat?" Hermes complained.

"Uh… nothing," Percy shook his head. He had to fight back the urge to roll his eyes. "Welp, I just hope the mortals won't be so hard or mean to me..."

Apollo sighed, then said, "You know Percy, you worry tooooo, too much young man. Bad vibes. Just sit back, relax and read on, lil' Seaweed Brain."

Percy narrowed his eyes. "Only Annabeth can call me that," he murmured at him.

Then, he lifted the phone and looked at the screen.

He carefully read:

" PercyJackson. You stupid, green-eyed, kelp-headed dork. You're still my hero though. #loveyou #SeaweedBrain"

One might have thought that Percy would keep his cool or just laugh it off. He's normally a positive, relaxed teenager. One might have even thought that Percy would second-guess who wrote that tweet. What actually happened was when he finished reading the last word, adrenaline slowly coursed its way into his heart and mind, and before the two gods know it, a positively upset demigod stood up and paced around the room, obviously offended by the tweet. His hands were rubbing the back of his head, and his face suddenly turned sour.
Of course, that meant that his face hadn't been captured entirely by the camera because he was out of shot, but at that point, he didn't care. He was at a loss for words as he paced the room, speechlessly upset and mortified, until…

"WHAT DO THEY MEAN THAT I'M STUPID?! AM I STUPID?! AND I AM NOT JUST SOME STUPID, GREEN-EYED, KELP-HEADED… DORK?! THEY HAD CALLED ME DORK?! Wh- Whaaa?! B-But… HOW D-DARE THEY… THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW ME! THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH. WHY, THEY BETTER-"

Unfortunately for Percy, he never finished his sentence as the god of messenger and the god of music dragged him by his arms and out the exit door to the side. They were prepared for reactions like this. Percy tried to resist, but failed miserably, only giving the gods more strength and control of the boy. "I'M PERCY JACKSON! I SHOULD BE-" Hermes clamped his mouth shut. (Of course, they could have simply poofed him back to camp, but the two Olympians promised each other they'd have some screen time on the camera every now and then.)
Apollo secretly thanked the heavens for not having any water fountains in the room. They knew they had taken it a bit too far, but it was nevertheless hilarious to see the demigod continue to rant. "A-AND HE OR SHE CALLED ME… ME A SEAWEED BRAIN? Wha- HEY, ONLY ANNABETH CAN CALL-" Once the protesting Percy had been dragged to the doorway, he vanquished and had been back exactly where he had been before being summoned-at the archery range.

Unfortunately, that still didn't stop Percy, as he continued to yell to the sky from nonsensical, gibberish things to how he saved the world and that mortals should respect him. After a good thirty seconds, it was finally over.

Until…

"HERMES! APOLLO! WHERE ARE YOU GUYS?! WHAT HAPPEN- wait. WAIT. Why-why am I back at Camp Half-Blood?" Percy asked, like he just landed on the moon. (Apparently he catches on slow.) His yelling also left a group of nearby campers, plus a mouth-hanging Will Solace who had just been teaching the new campers in using the bow and arrow, surprised and confused. "P-Percy? Are you o-okay?" Asked the son of Apollo.
So much of a day for the poor son of Poseidon. Even words can inflict damage on one's ego, but the green-eyed demigod had been reacting... a little too much. From that day on, he promised to himself though he'll never read any tweet on Twitter about him again, let alone touch a phone. The good news? Percy never noticed the snickers coming from the nearby bushes where two certain gods had been watching...