Author's Note: Inspired by a picture I saw on tumblr. : )

This is just a super silly story from the depths of my sleep-deprived brain. Enjoy!

I don't own Harry Potter or Dancing Queen.

Queen Of The Rink

"Albus, you can't possibly think-"

"Minerva. It's 1977. All of the kids are doing it."

"But the safety measures-"

"The students are already eager for it. Roller disco is happening Minerva, so I would suggest you get your skates."

Lily Evans was quite skilled when it came to roller-skating. Her parents had always enjoyed taking her family skating on the weekends, and even her cranky sister was willing to strap on a pair of skates and roll around the rink a few times. Disco roller-skating was, in Lily's opinion, the best sort of roller-skating (though she would never admit it to anyone). When Dumbledore had made the announcement that the Great Hall would be transformed into a roller rink each night after dinner for a week, she had jumped in her seat with excitement just like everyone else. But when he announced that Tuesday would be roller disco…

Let's just say, Lily was grateful that the bench she was sat on was made of sterner stuff than her bum.

When Lily entered the rink, she did so with the utmost grace. The lights reflecting off of the disco ball charmed to hang over the hall made her dress glitter brightly, and she knew that she was attracting attention as she took in the room. She was amused to see a piano sitting along the far wall, for she couldn't imagine why it would be necessary on disco night.

Lily did some loops around the room, smiling at the younger students and waiting for her boyfriend and their friends to arrive. She was surprised that they were so late, for she herself had come in nearly half an hour after the rink had opened. She was even more surprised that Sirius, who was a self-declared "bum watcher", was missing out on all of the tight, shiny dresses of the female skaters and the snug disco pants of the male skaters.

She had to laugh just thinking of the term "bum watcher". Sirius had created it after she had jokingly called him a bird watcher, as he had spent a good portion of an evening staring at a pretty blonde girl from Ravenclaw. He had pondered it for a while before wrapping his arm around an irritated Remus (who had spent most of the evening glaring at said Ravenclaw) and declaring that he needed a less gender specific title. She had given several suggestions (as had Remus, though his were uttered under his breath and were not at all child friendly), but James offered up "bum watcher" and Sirius was content.

Lily was still pondering the incident when Remus rolled into the room. She was greatly humored to see the book that Remus clutched in his hand, his nose buried deep within its depths as he rotated nimbly around the other skaters. She was just preparing to call out to him when poor Peter stumbled onto the rink.

She had tried to think of a way to kindly suggest that Peter stay sans-wheels for the evening, as his balance was shoddy at best, but came up short. She could now see that perhaps she should have recommended it anyways, for the poor boy looked as though he would fall over if anyone around him so much as breathed. She quickly changed course, deciding she could speak with Remus after she got Peter on more solid ground.

She was so focused on moving towards Peter that she missed the explosion from the entrance. She did not, however, miss the tambourine that was suddenly dangling from her fingertips. She raised it to her eyes, staring at the little instrument in confusion, when suddenly two all-too-familiar voices echoed through the hall.

"You can dance! You can jive! Having the time of your life! See that girl, watch that scene, diggin' the Dancing Queen!"

Lily groaned as James bloody Potter came rolling into the rink, glittery silver shirt and glittery, much too tight pants donning his body. He was wearing, of all things, a flower crown atop his messy head, and Lily wanted to die of embarrassment as he opened his arms wide and continued to sing.

"Friday night and the lights are low…"

She groaned as Sirius rolled into the room behind James, happily singing the next lines.

"Looking out for a place to go…"

The two were currently doing careful zigzags, each one opposite the other at all times, but Lily knew this wouldn't last long.

James continued, "Where they play the right music, getting in the swing…"

And Lily was right, for as he sang the next line, Sirius rolled forward and placed his hands on James's waist, lifting him high into the air.

"You come in to look for a king."

Her head whipped about as the accompanying piano piece echoed across the room, and she gasped in betrayal as Remus casually tapped the piano keys, nose still buried in his book as he did so.

"Anybody could be that guy!"

Lily moaned again as James sang his line, knowing that the two pun loving idiots would be all over the next lyric.

Across the room, Remus briefly skated a few feet back from the piano, allowing room for Peter to fall across the instrument in a desperate attempt to keep his balance, then returned to his previous spot. His eyes never left the novel he held in his hands.

Sure enough, Sirius sang, "Night is young and the music's…"

But James had to jump in to shout, "…HIGH!"

He even tilted his extended arms about and kicked his dangling legs a bit, just to drive the pun home.

The two slowly rolled around the room, grinning like mad as the onlookers clapped to the beat of the popular song. Peter rolled along shakily in front of them, tossing flower petals and just barely going quickly enough to avoid being run over. As the two grew closer and closer to the chorus, Lily suddenly realized what her tambourine was for.

She glanced about desperately for a place to stash the wretched thing, but it was too late. James and Sirius had reached the chorus, and James was pointing to her as they sang the first line.

"You are the Dancing Queen! Young and sweet, only 17! Dancing Queen, feel the beat from the tambourine!"

Lily half-heartedly raised her instrument and shook it, earning cheers and claps from the crowd.

But James and Sirius weren't done. They were still singing the chorus, and, to Lily's dismay, they were no longer pointing at her.

Normally this would have been something Lily delighted in, but now they were pointing at someone much worse.

Albus Dumbledore.

"You can dance! You can jive! Having the time of your life!"

To Lily's horror, James began waving his arms around his head, as though he were preparing to throw a lasso. She could hardly watch as he then "threw the lasso", aiming right for their Headmaster.

And then it got impossibly worse.

For then James was "reeling Dumbledore in"…and the old man was swaying towards him as though he were being pulled by a real rope.

Lily's jaw hit the floor as Dumbledore glided across the rink amongt screams and shouts. Peter had completely lost his balance and was now sitting on his rear, eyes like dinner plates watching the show. Even Remus abandoned his reading to stare as the Headmaster finally reached the two boys, casually taking James's hands to spin slowly in place as he joined in for the last line.

"See that girl, watch that scene, diggin' the Dancing Queen!"

Lily briefly, somewhere deep in her muddled and slightly disturbed line of thoughts, wondered how Sirius was okay with just holding James in the air for the duration of the song. After all, the boy was their resident drama-queen, and he typically preferred to be the one all eyes were on. But then they turned a bit further, and it became apparent to Lily what Sirius's eyes were trained on.

And the self-proclaimed "bum watcher" seemed just fine holding James high up in the air before him.

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