Disclaimer: Adam Park and Rocky DeSantos would make me one happy girl, but unfortunately I only get visits. (When's Aidan coming over, hey Ibonekoen?) Wedding Singer is owned by some bloke with a goatee, and partially by Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore. Iris is owned by another bloke (I don't know whether he has a goatee) who is a pretty good singer. _Underscoring…is that what you call those things?_ means a recap… recollection… memory… flashback! That's it! (Brackets) means thoughts, most probably Rocko's. Most flashbacks are self-explanatory, so email me (or IM me on AOL at Y2JDingo) if you can't figure out when one of them happened.
Note: Okay…if you people here like slash…:: watches as most people run away ::…uh…huh. Anyways, slash-lovers, click on my name and read either 'His Love', 'Secrets' or go down to my Fav. Authors and click on Ibonekoen, who is the champion of slash. (Beware Adam/Tanya lovers, Adam/Aisha lovers, and Tommy/Kim lovers…actually, be warned if you're a fan of Tommy, full-stop.)
Babble: God, school sucks! Just had to get that off my chest…:: angrily kicks leather blister-giving shoes :: Who knew high school could be so painful?
Forwardeth Ficeth! (Ye gads, doesn't that sound reeeeeeediculous?)
Rocky watched.
12:13.
He blinked.
12:14.
Things could change in the blink of an eye. Time, or people, or things, or…relationships.
He sighed.
Only two years ago things were so easy. Friends, study, that one special person…even the fact he was a Power Ranger. All that was easy…compared to now.
Lying spread-eagled on the bed, his fingers barely touching the bedposts, he thought, and remembered.
_"Rocko!" his best friend Adam called. "Stone Canyon's in the finals!"
"We're going against the Hasper City Ninjas?" Rocky exclaimed, sitting bolt upright.
Adam grinned as he plopped onto the grass next to the Hispanic teen. "Yep. Mr. Anderson's driving us to Angel Grove, where the final's going to be held."
"Woo, woo, slow down. You do realize the Hasper City blokes have never been beaten?" Rocky asked, placing careful amounts of emphasis on each word.
Adam threw him a puzzled glance. "Neither have we. Plus, there's the little fact that we were never on the Stone Canyon team when we went against them." He grinned. "I know what the outcome's going to be…Aisha, me and you?"
"We're going to get our butts kicked," Rocky muttered._
_"Peoples, we did it!" Aisha exclaimed, quickly stripping off to her underwear. Rocky gave a fake wolf-whistle, to which she gave the finger.
"I will never understand why you don't change in the toilets or something, Isha," Adam said, shaking his head as he more carefully removed his sports clothing, revealing a simple black shirt underneath. "Why do you insist on changing in the same room as us?"
"Maybe she has a crush on me," Rocky teased playfully. He ducked as Aisha's shoe flew through the air, hitting the locker only centimeters away from his head.
"You boys are me best friends," Aisha said, pulling down her yellow top. "And you'd never look."
"All well and good but hey, hey, don't damage the merchandise," he said fussily, moving to in front of the mirror, spiking his hair up again.
"Geez, you're as bad as Tamara back home," Adam said softly, running a hand through his own black messy crop. "I timed both of you getting ready and you lost."
Rocky stuck his tongue out as Aisha laughed. "Remember that one time we stole both of their bottles of hair-mousse, and they went nuts?"
Rocky pouted. "Why do you always pick on me?"
Adam smiled sympathetically, moving beside his best friend. "Little Rocky's feelings hurted?" Rocky nodded pathetically, looking like a lost little kid. "Come on," Adam said, placing an arm around his friend's shoulder. "You look fine." An evil grin crossed his face, which Rocky didn't notice. "But," he continued, picking up the nearby aerosol can. "You need a bit more hair stuff."
So said, half the bottle was dumped on Rocky's head._
_"Bye bye, three ninjas, huh Rock?" Adam questioned softly. He gazed out over the water, his long hair-the odd-side effect of the Orb of Doom-blowing in the wind.
Rocky sat down next to his friend, watching the white water birds on the other side of the water. "Just two," he confirmed quietly.
Adam smiled a trifle sadistically. "You know, on the Quest, I knew one of us was going to leave. For some reason I was so convinced it was going to be Kat, just a feeling." He laughed dryly. "Partially off; it was one of the girls."
Rocky nodded quietly, knowing all his friend needed was someone next to him. He watched as another bird joined the five birds on the other shore, the five accepting the little one easily.
"I guess the hardest thing to realize was that she wasn't going to be here anymore. No more teasing you, no more insistence in competitions that we all get one dressing room, no more sympathy pizza parties over her house when you broke up with a girlfriend, or when she had a fight with Bradley, or when I got trodden on by one of the guys or girls I dated…just the little things."
Three birds flew, while another three took their places.
"Like when you realized Jessica was a lying bitch, or when I realized I was bi, or when Aisha found out Brad was cheating…"
A black bird replaced a white one, one of the birds giving the black a friendly nudge on the wing.
"And then there was two," Rocky finished. He glanced over at his friend before clapping a hand on his friend's arm. "Call me."
Adam nodded, still gazing at the six birds. As Rocky turned away, one bird simply disappeared, replaced by a different looking one.
"I miss you, Isha."
A shadow flew over the lake. If Adam had been watching from above, he would have realized it was the exact shape of Aisha's BearZord._
_"Rocky…" Adam whispered, laying a hand on the arm closest to him.
"Hey, Adam," Rocky weakly grinned, turning his head ever so slightly.
Adam shook his head slowly, fighting back tears. "You're an idiot, you know that?"
Rocky grin/grimaced. "Yeah, and you're also a total wack job." He regarded his friend through half-closed lids. "Don't go sad on me, man," he pleaded gently.
Adam grinned sheepishly. "Now," Rocky said, lying back and closing his eyes. "What's been happening in the real world?"_
(Stupid, stupid,) Rocky cursed himself. (Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid!)
He had to go and lose that one friend that stayed, the one person always by his side…one person he had ever really loved other than family. (Stupid, stupid!)
_"Rocky?" Adam asked quietly as he walked into the room. "You awake?"
Rocky watched through barely-cracked eyes as Adam stopped over his bed. The back injury from the tournament months ago had been capitalized on heavily by an opponent in another match, landing him back in hospital, this time for probably over a month, taking in account that he wasn't connected to the Morphin' Grid anymore. Speaking of disconnected, the man standing above him had given up his powers a month ago, allowing their old friendship to re-grow more than ever.
Rocky watched, a little confused, as Adam placed a tape player on the table next to his bed. A tape was put in, the label reading 'For Rocky Only'. Adam smiled a little sadly as he shut the little compartment, before taping a note to the player. From where Rocky was lying he couldn't fully read it, but he was sure that it was pretty much just a 'Press play, Rocky only' kind of note. The former Black and Green Ranger strode slowly to the door, before stopping at the doorframe.
"Rocko," he said softly. "One hour. That's it." He exited the room quietly, shutting the door behind him.
Rocky got up slowly, leaning against the backboard of the bed for support. He reached over cautiously to grab the note, and it read:
Dear Rocky.
This is from Adam, in case you can't tell. I have no idea why the hell I'm doing this…actually, yes I do. This tape has everything on it I want…screw that, need to say. After you listen to this…alone, no one else in the room…you may never want to speak to me again, you might want to kill me, you might be shocked…but I desperately hope that you won't be one of the first two. I understand if you aren't…the same as what is said on the tape, I'll respect that. But I hope, I wish, I pray that this won't change…us…for the worse. Whatever you feel, if this changes for the better, stays the same, please…contact me within an hour. After one hour…I'll be gone, out of your life as long as I can manage it. Right now I'll be headed home, where I'll sit by the phone for precisely sixty-two minutes. After that…well, I enjoyed Australia.
Please don't hate me.
Adam.
Rocky stared at the paper, almost certain he had heard Adam's soft, clear voice actually reading the note as if they were in a bad B-grade movie. He looked curiously at the tape player, gazing into space for what seemed like only seconds. As if in a trance, he touched the 'play' button. A tear slowly came to his eye as he heard the song; one he had heard endless times playing in Adam's room.
And I'd give up forever to touch you
Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest thing to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything seems like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
Rocky drew in a shuddering breath, wiping his eyes as he lay back to contemplate the song. (Adam…loves me?) His thoughts ran in a similar course for a long period. But…all thought was drawn to a halt as he heard the tape keep going, and a familiar voice filled the room.
"Hey Rock. Obviously, you haven't chucked this out the window yet, but if you're going to, do it now, before I embarrass myself more." There was a brief pause. "Still here? Good. Now…you might think that was just a stupid thing, courtesy of the concussion I told you about that almost landed me permanently in hospital a while ago, but I'm perfectly sane…okay, maybe not. Here I am, babbling to a machine." He drew a deep breath. "Now, Rocko, remember back when we were ten, and Aisha had out all those chick flicks? The Wedding Singer? Remember our favourite part, at the end? Where they're on the plane, and Julia's serenaded by Robbie?" Brief stop. "Here goes nothing." The soft strumming of a guitar was heard, and Rocky listened in awe as Adam's voice softened.
I wanna make you smile
Whenever you're sad
Carry you around
When your arthritis is bad
All I wanna do is
Grow old with you.
I'll get you medicine
When your tummy aches
Build you a fire
When the furnace breaks
It could be so nice
Growing old with you.
I'll miss you
I'll kiss you
Give you my coat when you are cold
Need you
Feed you
Even let you hold the remote control
Let me do the dishes
In our kitchen sink
Put you to bed
When you've had too much to drink
I could be the man who
Grows old with you
I wanna grow old with you
"Sappy, I know. But God, Rocky, if you had any idea…one hour, man. Actually…now you have about half an hour, if I read the clock right."_
(And stupid me, adamant I didn't love him, didn't feel the same…forced him away to Australia for the last year…now, the big celebration…the first time anyone's seen Adam since…I didn't call.) Rocky smiled painfully. Billy and Trini's engagement party…not really, actually just an excuse for all the couples to turn up, get drunk and fall asleep on the couches. (Wonder upon wonders, Tommy did not end up with a Pink Ranger!) Actually, Jason's former girlfriend Emily had caught his eye, and within a week of giving up the Red Turbo powers they were going steady. Everyone was turning up at Billy's at one, so he got up reluctantly and brushed himself off, the blue jeans and red shirt casual yet smart at once.
Rocky swigged down part of his drink, eyes wandering over the crowd. One-fifteen…no sign of Adam. He smiled absently at Kim and Jason, who were talking to Tanya and Zack. He felt a hand on his shoulder, and glanced downwards to see Aisha. She was slightly shorter in 'this Zeo-reality', barely coming up to his shoulder.
"Looking for Adam?" she questioned.
"Haven't seen him in a while," he dodged.
She frowned. "Why did he leave, anyway?"
At his silence she glanced up, and stepped backwards slightly as a full mask of self-hatred fell over Rocky's face. "Let's just say my stupid head needed to have some sense beaten…no, told…to it."
Aisha looked at him curiously, but before she could ask, Rocky had disappeared.
The dark head surveyed the people, glancing just in time to his right where a small cannonball was headed straight for him. He put out his hands just in time, as Aisha rushed him. "For gosh sakes, give us some warning next time you float off to Australia!" she chided.
He smiled at her, but the former Yellow Ranger could see it didn't reach his eyes, which were closed and sorrowful. "Hey Isha."
Aisha looked at him curiously. "What's the matter?"
"Nothing." He raised an eyebrow. "You seen the other part of the Dream Team?"
"Last time I saw him he was around back." She gazed after him as Adam made his way to the side. "They had a huge fight," she decided.
"Last time I saw you it was an IV, not a beer."
"Last time I saw you it was two kilometers away, not two hundred kilometers away," Rocky returned.
Adam smiled regretfully. "Touché."
Rocky glanced at his friend. Adam was still on the lean side, but had a bit more muscle. He had grown slightly, and even sitting down Rocky guessed he would be taller than himself by about an inch. His hair was long, halfway down his back, loosely tied back and about three inches of the ends dyed a deep red. Gone were the green clothes; now pure black had taken over his wardrobe. Instead of one earring, there was a line of approximately six in the one ear, all hoops, connected by more hoops in a chain-like way. A simple silver chain was around his neck, and he looked like he had jumped straight out of the encyclopedia under 'biker'.
"What's with the new look?" he asked, striving for more idle small talk.
Adam shrugged absently, seemingly intent on mesmerizing the former Red's face. "I didn't want to be reminded of who I used to be."
(You're digging a hole here Rocko,) an inner voice warned. "Why not?" he questioned, trying to stop the words even as they came out of his mouth.
Adam smiled sadly, as if he was about to cry. "Because that boy wasn't loved. I'm not loved now, but that's my own choice."
Rocky was shocked silent. "But…you were loved!" he protested weakly. "Tanya, and Justin, and Kat, and Tommy, and Aisha, and your family…they all love you!"
His smile turned lost, an expression more at home on a little kid on the first day of school. "Aisha left, Justin and Tanya and them were just there, and when have my family…no, when have Terri, Daniela and Micheal Park ever even looked at me?"
Adam had a point, Rocky had to admit. He couldn't remember a time when Adam's mother or father or sister even noticed him. "What about me?" he asked wildly, leaning against the brick wall for support.
If possible, Adam's face grew even younger as Rocky watched. "You don't love me," he whispered. "I couldn't stay here, knowing you didn't love me. I wouldn't stay here! That's why I went, 'cause you didn't even call me to say that you were sorry you didn't feel the same…" Adam crumpled, and as Rocky watched in a mix of morbid fascination and dismay he was half-sitting, half-kneeling on the ground. "That's all I wanted," Rocky heard through Adam's sobs. "For you to say that you didn't…feel the same but that it was okay…I wanted to know if it would be okay…"
Rocky felt a tug in his chest as he watched Adam sobbing, and he walked/crawled over, putting an arm around his oldest friend. Adam didn't push him away, curling up as if in physical pain. "Shhhh, shhhh…" Rocky soothed, as if Adam was a child. "It's okay, I'm here…it's okay…"
"No it's not," Adam's muffled voice said, coming from Rocky chest. "I don't want to be here…not with them…"
Rocky made a split second decision. "Come on," he said, hoisting Adam up. "You're coming to my place."
"Why did you bring me here?" Adam asked softly, gazing around at Rocky's one story house.
Rocky shrugged carelessly. "Because I wanted to."
Adam looked around silently. He walked around the living room; occasionally stopping to pick up a photo or to look at one of the little statuettes Rocky had collected over the last year. A corner of his mouth turned up in a sadistic smile as he stopped at a little collection of seven tiny figures. Carefully he ran one finger down the back of a miniature cat, smiling, as he looked at the two little birds. Colour-coded in white, pink, black, red, blue and yellow, the figurines were perfect copies of the little Zords that had flown around their bodies on Phaedos, except for the cat which was a twin of P.C. His smile faded as he looked at the little ape, next to the tiny frog. Rocky watched as he picked up the frog, turning it around in his hands. Adam put it down, on the other side of the 'group', as far away from the ape as possible.
A brown hand reached from behind him to pick up the ape, and it was moved to next to the frog. "The ape isn't happy about being left alone," a voice whispered in his ear.
Adam whirled around, ending up in a corner just next to the table with the animals. Rocky stepped forward, bringing them almost nose-to-nose. Glancing at both men's faces, there was no hint of want, need or love, simply slight anger and determination on Rocky's, and an indifferent look on Adam's.
"Funny, he was happy about it a year ago," Adam said coolly.
"Funny, the frog wasn't happy a year ago," Rocky said coolly.
"Why did you really bring me here?" Adam asked.
Rocky stared at him. Adam's face was a mask: hardly any expression got past him without him wanting it. But…was that…
"You've been in deadly fights against giant monkeys," he said quietly. "You were once almost turned into an evil consort. You more than once were almost fatally injured. You have been in the hospital more times than I've gone out with girls. And lastly, you knowingly almost killed yourself trying to protect me, more times than we've been in winning karate matches." Rocky gave a snort. "And you think you can still block your feelings from me." He waited a beat.
"Why are you afraid of me?" he questioned softly.
Adam laughed, but with no humor. "Why am I afraid of you?" Rocky waited, expecting him to deny it. "Because you can kill me worse than anyone else can."
"I love you." Rocky stared at Adam, shocked, as the words came out of his own mouth.
Adam started shaking his head. "See, that's why I went to Australia, so you wouldn't pity me and tell me a whopping lie like that." There was a pause. Adam stared at Rocky, something in his eyes soft, the rest of his visible feelings as hard as steel. "That kills me. You telling me that you love me."
"I do," Rocky said desperately. "I love you, I love you, I love you!"
Adam kept shaking his head, watching the ground. "Lying is not your style, Rocko. I have never lied to you. As far as I know, you have never lied to me until this moment. Don't say you love me when you don't mean it."
"But I mean it!" protested Rocky.
A single crystalline tear trickled down Adam's cheek; the former Black Ranger not wiping it away. "Rocky, I know you better than anyone. I know when you lie, and I know when you tell the truth. You are either saying that to keep me here…or you are saying it because up here…" He tapped Rocky on the forehead. "…there's a part of you that insists you can't love me. But that goes against the part in here…" He lightly touched Rocky's chest. "…which is saying what I really want to hear." Adam moved his head on an angle. "Rocky, I still love you, but until you realize what you want…"
All movement stopped as Rocky considered what his friend was saying. (Do I love Adam?) he questioned himself. (I thought I loved him as a brother…do I or don't I?)
He was pulled out of his thoughts by Adam trying to get past him. Without thinking he pushed one hand on his friend's chest, pushing him back into the corner.
"Look, Rocko, I'm sorry for loving you. You happy?" Adam took a deep breath which Rocky took advantage of.
He pushed himself against Adam, hissing into his friend's ear. "Never doubt me…" Rocky kissed him.
Two pairs of eyes fluttered closed, a violent, claiming kiss turning light and sweet. Adam pushed himself hard against Rocky, lips opening to deepen the kiss. Hands moved, touching everywhere on the other's body. Adam pulled himself away, lips almost bruised from the pressure of the kiss. He smiled at Rocky, who was pretty much panting for breath.
"Rocko?"
"Yeah, man?" Rocky panted.
"Never lie to me again."
He swooped down for a second kiss.