Nothing. It was all just nothing.

I could not see anything, yet I saw every single detail, vibrantly, lividly, sharp, clear and engraved in my mind, but I could not see anything.

I could not hear anything, yet I heard every single word echo, over and over, statement clear, words carved in my breaking-glass heart, but I could not hear anything.

I could not fight, even though I slashed and kicked, screamed, hit, punched, and all over again, I could not fight. I did not win. But neither did you. But we didn't tie. Neither you nor I won, but at the same time we did not tie either.

I could not allow myself to lose to someone like you.

But I did not want to win this way either. I could not allow myself to lose, yet I did not want to win. We did not tie. But neither of us won.

I lost want I had tried to lose for the majority of my life, but now that its gone... I am no longer myself. I look the same, I act the same, I walk the same, I talk the same, I say the same, I see the same, I hear the same, but I am not myself.

... What do I know when I cannot see what is not there? When I cannot hear what is not spoken and what has gone unspoken? What could I do when I cannot fight? When I do not have my only sword in my hand, the sword which I gave up and lost, the sword that I had to break to use in all its might?

I cannot fight without a sword. I cannot fight without something to fight for. I could not allow myself to fight for fightings sake...

I could not protect. I rescued you, yet I could not protect you. I saved you, yet I did not protect you. I promised you, yet I could not keep it. I vowed, yet I broke myself against it. I could not protect you. I helped you, yet I did nothing.

I watched over you, yet I did not see you.

I did nothing. Now you tell me I did something, but that something was a lie? I lied. I thought I was honest, I thought I always told the truth, but I lied. I was a lie. I lived a lie. Your words confused me, I was told that when I did nothing, I did something, but that something was a lie? How can someone comprend that straight off the bat when they were raised to be honest?

... Who was wrong, who was right? You said there was no such things as wrong and right. Am I insane? You said wrong and right, lies and truth were made up so humans could keep their sanity. Does that mean I don't know right and wrong? Does it mean I don't know truth and lies? What do I know, if I am insane?

It doesn't matter, it didn't matter in the end. When I walked out and the door shut, it didn't really end. Now someone else is telling me all these coincidences and says I know nothing. Or rather, I shouldn't know anything. Yet.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, all rights go to their rightful owners.

References to more or less all of Ichigo's fights up to possibly Aizen's, rescuing Rukia and Orihime, including others if you so wish, and maybe Senna from the first Bleach movie. Where he was talking about wrong and right, reference to his talk with Aizen during the Winter War, the end being the start of the Fullbring arc.