Choices
By: silverwriter01
All characters belong to Glee, FOX and Ryan Murphy. I'm just borrowing them.
Synopsis: Rachel helps Brittany make the decision between Santana and Artie, while Santana's mother has a long needed talk with her daughter.
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Rachel exited the auditorium just as the janitor came in. The halls were empty since school had let out an hour before. She decided to go into the restroom to floss and touch up her lip gloss. She entered the bathroom looking for the items she wanted in her bag, when she stopped. Someone was sitting on the bathroom floor, kneels curled up to their chest. Rachel instantly recognized it was Brittany.
"Brittany?" She asked, moving closer to the blonde, "What's wrong? Did you forget the way out?"
"No."
Rachel paused, wondering what to do. She then went to the paper-towel dispenser and tore off several rolls of the light brown paper. After carefully arranging them on the floor beside Brittany, she knelt down on them. She rubbed Brittany's arm, "Tell me what's wrong."
Brittany lifted her head and Rachel could see she had been crying for some time. Brittany said, her voice soft, "I can't. It's…private."
Rachel looked in her purse and pulled out a tiny package of tissues she kept in there. She started dabbing Brittany's face, "That's okay."
Brittany bit her lip, "I mean I want to talk to somebody. It's so confusing for me."
"What if I guess?" Rachel offered.
Brittany nodded and Rachel thought as she stared at the former Cheerio. She said, "It's about Santana."
More tears ran down Brittany's face and she cried, "Yes. We used to be friends and now she barely even looks at me. I miss her so much."
"Does this have to do with Artie and the song you two sang with Ms. Holiday?" Rachel asked.
Brittany gave a tiny nod. Rachel nodded to herself, it all made sense, "I see. Did Santana say she loved you?"
"Yes," Brittany sniffed, "I love her too. I would be with her if it wasn't for Artie. But I told her I can't hurt Artie. I just can't. She's barely talked to me since. I don't know why. We were best friends."
Rachel brushed some of Brittany's hair away from her face, "Santana's not talking to you because it hurts her that you didn't break up with Artie to be with her."
"I didn't want to hurt either of them!" Brittany exclaimed, "Now Santana's hurt and mad at me. I miss her so much. I miss our lady kisses and cuddles. I miss holding pinkies with her. I miss singing in her car together. I hurt because I miss her."
"Well, Brittany, it seems like you have to make a choice."
"A choice?"
"Yes," Rachel confirmed, "Do you want to be with Artie or Santana? If you choose Artie, you have to accept you can't have Santana. If you choose Santana, you have to know you'll hurt Artie and he'll act the same way that Santana's acting now."
Brittany shook her head, "I don't know which one to choose. Can't you sing My Headband to make me feel better?"
Rachel shook her head and stood up. She offered a hand to Brittany, "I have a way to help you choose which person to be with."
.
"And so, they're moving me back here to be vice president of the company. I won't have to travel as much and I'll be home more. We can spend more time together, mija," Santana's mother told her.
"That's great, Mama," Santana said without enthusiasm. She was leaning against the kitchen's island while her mother made them a salad. Adriana cast her daughter a look. She knew her daughter seemed depressed.
"Where is mi patito?" Adriana asked.
Adriana watched as Santana shrugged, "With her boyfriend I guess."
There was something about the way Santana said the sentence that alerted Adriana to the fact her daughter was not okay. She picked up a hand towel and started wiping her hands. She asked, "Did you and Brittany get into a fight?"
"God, Mom!" Santana shouted, "Why can't you just drop it already?"
Santana shoved away from the island and stormed up to her room. Adriana stood where she was for a moment, wondering what to do next. She opened a bottle of water and sipped it for a few minutes, thinking things out. She knew that Santana and Brittany had to have fought and she was sure Brittany's boyfriend was the cause.
Adriana knew this day would come. She had been preparing for it since her five year old daughter had stated she was going to marry her blonde best friend. Part of her had hoped Santana wouldn't be gay but she knew there was a chance. It was the same chance everybody had.
She put down her bottle of water and made her way upstairs to Santana's room. When she knocked on the door, she heard the muffled reply, "I don't want to talk!"
Adriana opened the door anyway, "Mija, I think we need to."
Santana had been lying face down on her bed. When her mother entered, she rolled over to glare at her, "Haven't you heard of privacy?"
Adriana ignored the glare and entered the room. She looked around briefly. She saw new clothes that she hadn't bought Santana nor showed up on her daughter's credit card. She berated herself. Santana had obviously been seeking attention and she hadn't been around enough to see it.
Adriana sat down beside her daughter and stroked her hair. She asked, "Is there anything you want to tell me, Santana?"
Santana refused to meet her mother's eyes. Adriana watched as her daughter gulped and a lone tear fell from her eye. It broke her heart.
"You can tell me anything," Adriana urged.
"I…I umm…I think…" Santana tried to start, but found she couldn't. Adriana wanted her daughter to say it, but decided to ask instead. "Santana, are you gay?"
"Yes," Her daughter cried before dissolving into tears. She sobbed, "Please don't kick me out. I'm sorry. I didn't want to be this way. Please, please. I tried. I tried. I did it with so many boys, but…but… Please don't stop loving me. Please don't be disappointed in me. Please."
Adriana quickly wrapped her daughter in a hug, "No, no, Santana. I could never stop loving you. I'm not disappointed and I'm not going to kick you out. I love you. Nothing will ever change that."
Santana's sobs of fear and pain turned into sobs of relief. She held onto her mother and cried about everything.
Adriana gently rocked back and forth, holding her daughter close. She couldn't believe Santana thought she would kick her out or stop loving her. She just held her daughter tighter until her crying died down.
Santana finally pulled back and started wiping her eyes, "I'm sorry."
Adriana brushed some of Santana's hair away from her face, "Nothing to be sorry about, mija. I'm the one who's sorry. I'm sorry if I ever gave you a reason to think I wouldn't love you."
Santana tried to shrug, "It's just…kids at school and I thought…I don't know what I thought. Sometimes I just feel so alone and worthless."
Adriana was not going to let her daughter feel that way. She took Santana's hand in hers and said, "Santana Maria Lopez, you listen to me. You are not alone and you are not worthless. If those kids at school mess with you, you don't let them get to you. And if someone bigger than you messes with you, you come to me. I'll tell your uncle Rafael and he'll take care of him."
Santana had to laugh. Her uncle Rafael was as tall as a tree but wouldn't hurt a fly.
"You be proud of who you are. People may say hurtful things but never let it touch you in here," Adriana said, touching Santana's heart.
"Yes, Mama."
"So," Adriana said, "Do you want to talk about Brittany?"
Santana bit her lip to keep another wave of tears from coming up.
"She is the one…you know? I mean I always thought you two were…dating," Adriana tried to phrase, "I mean your father and I are not blind or deaf. However, you both kept dating boys so I was never sure."
Santana softly confessed, "I love her."
"Well, that's obvious, mija."
"But she's choosing some stupid boy over me!" Santana cried, "She said she loved me too, but obviously she doesn't."
Adriana soothed back some of Santana's hair, "You know as well as I do nothing is ever simple for mi patito. Whenever you aren't there to help her with decisions, she takes some time. Remember when you asked her to come on vacation with us when you two were fourteen, but it was at the same time as her dance camp?"
"Yeah," Santana nodded.
"You knew she wanted to come with us, but really wanted to go to camp as well. Instead of forcing her to make up her mind, you let her decide by herself. She chose to come with us and you two had a great time."
"Yeah, we did," Santana agreed trying really hard not to blush. On that trip she and Brittany had practiced kissing with each other for the first time. Santana had called it practicing anyway but she had really meant the kisses.
"So let mi patito have some time to decide for herself. It may take a while or maybe she'll have some help from another friend."
"But what if she doesn't choose me?" Santana asked in a small, scared voice.
Adriana leaned over to kiss her daughter's temple, "Then you are in for a tough decision. You must decide whether you can still be friends with Brittany or not."
Santana nodded to show she understood but her mother was right. That would be a hard decision. It had been very hard on her the past few weeks not to talk or even look at Brittany. She missed her so much.
"Now," Adriana said, looking around, "We need to talk about this shoplifting. It ends today."
Santana blushed a deep red, "Mama…"
.
"You're so nice, Rachel," Brittany said with a giant smile on her face.
"Don't mention it," Rachel said, sitting down at the table with her. She placed a tray down in front of them.
Brittany's eyes grew wide at the sight of the three bowls of ice cream in front of her. The former Cheerio had skipped all the way to Rachel's car when Rachel had said they were going to get ice cream. They talked about ice cream all the way to the ice cream shop.
Rachel angled two bowls near Brittany and kept one for herself.
"Are both of those for me?" Brittany asked.
"Yes. One is chocolate, as you can see. The other is butter-pecan. You said you loved both, right?"
"Yes," Brittany declared, "I've always loved chocolate but when I tried butter-pecan a few months ago, I realized I liked the nuts."
Rachel tried not to laugh. She said, "They are both for you."
Brittany tried to pull both bowls closer to her, but Rachel stopped her, "You can only have one."
Brittany frowned, looking down at the ice cream, "But you said they are both for me."
"They are. You can choose either one of them, but you can't have both."
"But," Brittany protested, "That's not fair."
"Life isn't fair sometimes. You can only have one. Do you want chocolate or butter-pecan?"
Brittany frowned down at the ice cream, looking between each other. Rachel then turned the bowls around to show what Brittany couldn't see before. She had given the cashier a few dollars to carefully arrange sprinkles on each ice cream.
"Why does the chocolate have an S on it and the butter pecan have an A on it?"
"Because the chocolate represents Santana and the butter pecan represents Artie. Now Brittany, look at me."
Blue eyes looked up to meet brown, "I need you to listen very carefully. You have to take this decision very seriously. You can't pick butter pecan today because you're having a craving. Whichever bowl you pick, you pick because this is the one you want. Don't worry about hurting the other flavor's feelings. This is about the flavor you want for life."
"But if I choose one, what will happen to the other?" Brittany asked.
"Someone will come along and take care of them," Rachel reassured her.
Brittany stared at the bowls a moment longer before pulling the chocolate towards her. She softly said, "I can't live without chocolate. I just can't."
"Do you understand what you're really choosing?" Rachel asked.
Brittany nodded, "Yes. I'll talk to Artie tonight and Santana tomorrow. Do you think she'll take me?"
"I'm sure of it," Rachel said. She pushed the butter pecan to the side and picked up her own bowl of strawberry ice cream. She stated before digging in, "I, myself, love strawberry ice cream. Always have, always will."
It was obvious to Rachel that Brittany was enjoying her chocolate ice cream but she kept casting sad looks to the abandoned bowl.
"What are you two girls doing?"
The girls looked up to see Puck and Lauren standing beside them.
"Just enjoying a bowl," Rachel said, "Hey, do you want this bowl? It's free."
"Sure," Puck said, taking it. He then paused to look at Lauren, "Unless you want it."
She waved her hand, "Nah, you can have it. But you're still buying me ice cream."
"Of course," Puck said. They went to get Lauren a triple scoop of ice cream and came back. He said, looking at the bowl, "Why does it have an A on it?"
"Stands for Awesome," Rachel said before Brittany could say anything.
"Oh, cool," Puck said before he started eating it.
.
"Hey Brittany, can we talk?" Santana timidly asked by their lockers the next morning.
Brittany brightly smiled, "Yes."
She took the Hispanic girl's hand and started leading them to the music room, which was empty that early in the morning.
"Umm, Brittany, what are you doing?"
"I want to tell you something."
Once in the room, Brittany turned on the lights and closed the door. She said, turning to face Santana, "I choose chocolate."
"Huh?" Santana asked, totally confused.
"Rachel helped me figure it out. I choose chocolate ice cream over butter pecan," Brittany happily stated.
"What does that mean, Brittany?" And why was Berry taking her best friend out for ice cream, she darkly thought.
Brittany took a step closer to Santana, "It means I choose you. I broke up with Artie last night and I want to be with you."
She lightly kissed Santana on the lips and pulled back. She then asked, "Do you still want me?"
"Yes," Santana rushed to say, "Yes. I broke up with Sam last night and I came out to my Mama too. I told her about us."
"Was she okay with it?" Brittany asked, suddenly worried about Adriana's opinion.
Santana nodded, "She was really great, actually. So…do you really love me back and want to be with me?"
"Yes," Brittany nodded, smiling brightly, "Rachel helped me see that I can't live without chocolate. That's why we're here now."
"Stop talking about Berry," Santana said before pulling Brittany close again. She didn't care that everyone could see her from the window in the door and it would be all over the school by the 2nd block. Brittany had chosen her and they loved each other. That's all that mattered.
.
"Quinn, if you were an ice cream flavor what flavor would you be?" Brittany asked.
"What?" Quinn replied, looking from Brittany to Santana.
"Just amuse her," Santana said, "She's been in an ice cream phase all week."
"I'd be strawberry I guess. Why?"
"No reason," Brittany smirked.