The User's Guide and Manual for:
The EOBARD THAWNE Unit
Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of an EOBARD THAWNE unit. Please follow all the specifications to maximize enjoyment of this unit. Note: Prime, Season 1, and Season 2 Units are all the same thing.
Technical Specifications:
Name: Eobard Thawne
Alias: Harrison Wells, Dr. Wells, Professor Zoom, Zoom, The Reverse-Flash
Age: 52
Height: 6"0'
Weight: Unknown
Resident of: Central City, The Future
Accessories:
1 A.I Gideon
2 set of The Reverse Flash suit
1 ring for suit
1 wheelchair
1 suit
1 tie
1 STAR LABS Building
1 prison cell
Programming:
Your EOBARD THAWNE unit will arrive with three general functions
Villain: You need you boss or teacher killed? Have an annoying coworker who spills coffee everywhere? Your EOBARD THAWNE unit will take care of them quickly and painfully. NOTE: The EOBARD THAWNE unit may refuse to do it if it does not help it get home and or harm the BARRY ALLEN unit.
Master Planner: You need to stop a villain who has kidnapped your family? Or pay someone a large amount of cash. Your EOBARD THAWNE unit will come up with a foolproof plan to help you along. Note: Central City inc. and or parent company DC Enterprises is not responsible if the plan fails.
Scientist: Do you not understand your chemistry homework? Or do you need to cure cancer? Your EOBARD THAWNE unit will help you get it done in a flash. NOTE: Your EOBARD THAWNE unit may choose not to help you because to him you have been dead for centuries.
Your EOBARD THAWNE unit is designed to be manipulative, analytical, and a genius.
Cleaning:
Your EOBARD THAWNE unit will clean itself. Do not attempt to help it in any way. NOTE: Central City inc. and or parent company DC Enterprises is not responsible for any injuries, deaths, or suicides.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q- My EOBARD THAWNE unit has glowing red eyes and is vibrating his hand over my chest.
A- You have switched your EOBARD THAWNE unit into villain mode, switching him into another mode will solve the problem.
Q- My unit keeps attempting to kill my BARRY ALLEN unit.
A- The EOBARD THAWNE unit is designed to hate the BARRY ALLEN unit. Also, your unit won't kill your BARRY ALLEN unit. Because that will create insane paradoxes.
Q- My unit killed my CISCO RAMON unit, and when I try to talk to it tries to kill me.
A- If you buy a BARRY ALLEN unit it should fix this
Q- My unit keeps going into this creepy braille room but I'm too scared to go in. What should I do?
A- Do not under any circumstances enter the time vault.
Troubleshooting:
Q- My unit isn't paralyzed?
A- Your EOBARD THAWNE unit/IMPOSTER! HARRISON WELLS unit isn't designed to be paralyzed
Q- My unit wants to kill me and everyone I love?
A- Have you stranded it in the twenty-first century, found out its true intentions, killed the BARRY ALLEN unit, or spilled coffee on its work?
Q- My unit is speaking in a creepy voice demanding more speed or he will murder everyone I care about?
A- You have accidentally ordered the HUNTER ZOLOMON unit. Please return it immediately.