Something that just popped into my head recently... Enjoy!

Curse(?) of the Chaos Goddess

A Fire Emblem Heroes Fan Fiction

by Derald Snyder

Prince Chrom of the Halidom of Ylisse was bent down on one knee, panting heavily, his right hand gripping Falchion tightly, using it as a support. Looking up, he saw the outstretched hand of his victorious opponent...

"Good fight," Ike said with a nod. "It's not often I meet a fellow swordsman who can make me break a sweat. It's like I've always said- fighting a strong rival is better than any training."

"You don't say," Chrom grunted as he accepted Ike's hand, getting pulled to his feet. "I'm surprised I could hold my own against the likes of the Radiant Hero himself..." Just then, the two Heroes heard the sound of rapid footfalls...

"Chroooooom!" It was his sister Lissa, who ran into the room with a panicked look on her face.

"Lissa, what is it? What's wrong?!"

"Is it an attack?" Ike inquired.

"No, it's- it's Owain!" Lissa cried. "He's lying on the floor in his room, clutching at his eyes! And my healing staves aren't working!"

The Ylissean prince could only heave a sigh at his future nephew's behavior. "Alright, let's go take a look. Though knowing Owain, he's probably making a mountain out of a molehill again... If you'll excuse us, Ike."

"Sure," Ike waved them off. Part of him hoped that his younger sister would never sire a son like that... then he heard the sound of chirping, looking up and seeing a familiar small orange bird flitting through the air towards him, eventually alighting on his shoulder. "Oh, hello Yune. Is something up?"

In response, the bird hopped up to his ear, before silently chirping so only he could hear... Ike's eyes going wide at what Yune told him...

*In Owain's room...*

"Owain, I brought Chrom!" Lissa announced as she and her brother entered.

"Why him?! He can't help me! No one can help me!" the blond swordsman wailed in agony, his hands covering the upper half of his face. "Just leave me to suffer the ailment that has been inflicted on me!"

"Owain, what happened?" Chrom said as he knelt down at his nephew's side. "Did you get blinded or something?"

"Oh yes! Blinded by the darkness! By the goddess of darkness and chaos, I have been struck blind!" Owain cried.

"Here, let me see," Chrom grunted as he grabbed the blonde's arm, pulling it away with some effort. "Owain, I can't see what's wrong with your eyes when you've got them closed so tight!"

"For good reason!" the blond replied, "For if I open my eyes, that horrid image appears! It has been seared forever into my retinas!"

"...Wait, so you just saw something you weren't supposed to see?" Lissa guessed. "What, did you walk in on Severa in the bath again?"

"No, no, no, Mother!" Owain forcefully denied. "What I have witnessed... 'twas far worse than that!"

"Um, If I may..." Lissa and Chrom turned to see Ike standing in the doorway. "A little birdie just told me that he got a glimpse under Yune's shawl."

"Yune...? You mean that little red-haired girl that was summoned recently?" Lissa asked. "The one with the wild hair?"

"That's her!" Owain confirmed. "The goddess of chaos and darkness herself!"

"She doesn't like being called a dark god," Ike said pointedly. "And why were you looking under her shawl anyway?"

"I-it's not what you think!" the swordsman insisted. "Lucina just wanted me to see her measurements! She thought she could come up with a better outfit for her...!"

"Lucina...?! Oh, gods..." Chrom groaned. "Owain, you of all people should know that she has no sense of fashion..."

"Of course I know that!" Owain shot back. "But she was just so happy and enthusiastic! What cruel cousin would I be to dash her euphoria on the cold hard rocks of reality?! Oh, how I wish now that I had said no...!"

"...I'm probably gonna regret this," Lissa said hesitantly, "but what DID you see, exactly?"

"...Nothing! Absolutely nothing!" her son responded.

"Nothing...?" Chrom grunted in confusion, before something occurred to him. "Wait, you mean she was naked under the shawl?!"

"Completely!" his nephew confirmed. "Now do you see?! My poor eyes are forever scarred with the image of LOLI GODDESS PORN! Oh, the horror! Oh, the agony!"

Lissa's mouth dropped. "What."

Chrom just facepalmed. "I should've known..."

Meanwhile, Ike muttered under his breath, "So that's why she wanted me to be the one to explain..."

~*Fin*~

Yes, I know that Yune does wear clothes under her shawl, as her 'damaged' artwork from Fire Emblem Heroes shows, but it was just too funny an idea to pass up... anyway, review!