Are Bella and Edward soul mates? If everything went differently, would they have still managed to end up together? After all, Edward was born a century before Bella, and somehow they met. Sounds like meant to be. But is it fate or circumstance that kept them together? What if fate conspired against them? What if Bella never jumped off a cliff?
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To begin my story at the cliff seems a little cliché. After all, I was contemplating jumping from a high cliff in order to hear a voice in my head. It hardly paints a pretty picture of my sanity, though my sanity was the farthest thing from my mind at the time. I was arguing with a voice in my head, though I was mostly arguing so the voice would continue. It growled as I dangled my foot off the edge, told me to go home to Charlie. I had my decision nearly made. I was going to jump, when something stopped me. To this day I couldn't tell you what it was. It was almost as if I was physically rendered incapable of the action. Some would say I lost my nerve but that wasn't it. There was a tangible force in the air, telling me I was making the wrong decision.
I went to the garage to wait for Jacob. I had made up my mind on the way over. I was going to stop living in a fantasy world where voices kept me going, where I held onto the hope that maybe one day he would come back. He had never cared to begin with, he told me so. I remembered that day in the forest, and I expected the hole in my chest to open again, to start throbbing and incapacitate me. I waited for it, but before it could come Jacob walked in. My Jacob, warm and smiling as always. He stopped short when he saw my face, twisted in grief. He ran to my side.
"Bella! What's wrong, what's happened? Is Charlie okay?" He was so concerned. He was always concerned about me, the sun that had brought light back into the world. I looked up into his brown eyes and saw a tender love there, love for me. It was nothing like what I had seen when I looked into Edward's eyes, but wasn't that the point? Edward had left me, broken me, thrown me away into a blackness that only Jacob's warmth had lifted. I knew I could never feel for Jacob what I had felt for Edward, but did that really matter? I tried to smile.
"Nothing's wrong, silly Jake. I've just made a decision." Jacob looked wary, as maybe he should have. I took his hand in mine and closed the short distance between our faces, putting the lightest of kisses on his lips. It was weird in a way, my lips not molding the shape of his. I had never kissed anyone that wasn't ice cold. I loved them completely oppositely, Edward and Jacob. Edward had consumed my soul, engulfed me in a timeless love that would be as frozen in time as he was. Being with Edward had always meant death and then life. Being with Jacob would mean life, simple and pure. We could have children, grow old together.
I broke the kiss apart reluctantly, enjoying the heat of his mouth on mine. He gently stroked my face, steadying his breathing. "What brought this on?" He whispered.
"Edward." I said, and Jacob stiffened. "We have to talk about it sooner or later, Jake. We can't go into this without you knowing everything."
"I know everything I want to know, Bells. You told me, just now."
"You know I'll always love him, Jake. He was my world once."
"Yeah, Bells, he was your world. Once. Not anymore. No one should ever be your whole world. I don't want to be your world, I just want to live in it with you."
"That actually sounds… nice."