A/N: The characters aren't mine. I don't know whose they are, but they aren't mine.
The Strudel Girl
There she was in the bakery window. It was love at first sight. Well, she didn't see me, but I loved her from the moment I saw her, carrying that cinnamon strudel.
Oh, the Germanity! I knew she'd never love me. I was too different from her. But maybe, because opposites attract, she wouldn't care about what I was. It's about what's inside that counts.
I made my decision. I entered the bakery, and went right up to her.
"Hello," I said meekly, hoping that she liked the strong silent type.
"Um..."she replied.
"I was wondering..." I said, "Would you, maybe, you know, go out with me?"
"But how could I? You're a square."
"I know I'm a bit old fashioned, but –"
"No, I mean that you are, literally a square. A Mini-Wheat. I can't date food."