Hello everyone, yeah another story by me.
Disclaimer: SM owns all of the characters except mine, so nah! XP
Rain, soft and gentle, fell from the sky onto my unprotected head. All around me was a mass of black umbrellas huddled together around my mother's grave. I felt as hollow as the grave I stood in front of, gazing with unblinking eyes at the oak coffin in front of me. A beautiful boutique of lilies and pale white roses lay on the closed lid. The people from the cemetery had told me I could take the flowers home with me but I knew they were Mom's favorite and left them on her coffin. I tilted back my head and gazed up at the sky, blinking the rain from my eyes.
The rain was such a rare thing were we lived in California, Mom and I had loved it when it rained. We used to go out and dance around like complete idiots every time it rained. For the longest time it had just been me and Mom, never knew Dad since he left shortly after only staying with Mom for a couple of weeks. I only knew his name because Mom told me only a couple of months ago when I wouldn't stop bugging her. Joshua Uley, some Native American from Washington.
The dull thud of dirt hitting the lid of the coffin made me jump. My head whipped down to looked down into the grave. Mom's coffin lay in it and they were shoveling dirt clods, the dull thuds echoing eerily in my head. This was it, Mom was actually gone. Once that grave was covered she would be gone from me forever. I had cried and screamed when I first found Mom. Blood had been everywhere in her beautiful kitchen, staining everything that had ever meant something to her. But after that I felt sort of numb, empty even. My whole world had shattered in that moment when I opened the front door and saw the first drops of blood on her pristine rug.
Even now I felt hallow, empty. It was like I was watching all of this going on from far away. Like this was some crazy soap opera or something. I stood there long after the other observers left. Watching the dirt pile up around my mother's coffin. I was aware of someone standing beside me, yet another black umbrella, as the diggers patted down the last of the dirt on her grave. My eyes were drawn to the headstone. In loving memory of Debra Rainy, mother and cherished friend. By then I was totally soaked through by the cool rain.
"Where will you live?" The sound of Officer Branson's voice made me jump. He had been Mom's boyfriend at the time and I knew he had wanted to propose to her. Being only Mom's boyfriend meant I couldn't legally live with him. I was nineteen, I could live on my own if I wanted to but I didn't have much money and no family that I knew of.
I turned my head to look at Davis Branson. He was a nice enough guy and would offer for me to stay with him until I could get on my own two feet but I didn't want to live alone. I had lived with Mom my whole life, once in a while a man was in the picture, but it had always just been Mom and me. "I don't know." I admitted. He nodded, his movements gruff and jerky. His eyes were red and I had seen him crying when he first came onto the scene of my mother's murder. That jarred me a little. I wasn't the only one grieving. Mom had meant so much to other people. Our neighbors, the people she worked with, her students. Everyone would miss her, but not as much as me.
"I took the liberty of trying to find your father. I found his name and the last known address he lived at. No one's seen him in years but I managed to get a hold of his son. A man by the name of Sam Uley. He and his fiance live on a reservation in Washington. I called him and he has agreed to let you come and live with him." He said. An emotion like guilt built inside of me. I had a half-brother, he had a life and he had a fiance. But I was too selfish to live alone now, I didn't want to be alone with the nightmares.
I nodded, thinking of the things I would have to leave behind when I left. I had never been outside of California, let alone outside of our tiny town. I couldn't take everything with me but I certainly couldn't leave behind certain items.
Davis wrapped an arm around my shoulders as he led me toward his cruiser. "I'll buy you the ticket, bus or plane?" He asked. I grimaced at the thought of flying, being deathly afraid of heights. The bus would at least take one to two days. I sighed and gazed out the window at the rain.
"I guess I'll take the plane. Does he know I'm coming?" I asked. Davis nodded, pursing his lips in a frown. "I don't know how I feel about you traveling across a whole state by yourself." He muttered. I smiled faintly, gazing out the window.
"Davis, I'll be fine. I'm nineteen years old, not nine." I said, giving him a wane smile over my shoulder. Davis huffed and kept driving. I kind of didn't want to go back to the house and I knew neither did Davis, but I had to get my stuff. The house wasn't very far from the cemetery so it was a short drive. I wished it had been longer.
Getting out of the car, I stared at the house. I half expected Mom to step out, wearing her apron with her hair up in a messy bun, and come over to greet me and Davis. Like nothing had happened. Like she hadn't been torn to shreds by some sicko in her own kitchen. Tears pricked my vision as I stared at the house. Davis came to stand beside me, his eyes on the front door as if he were thinking the same thing. Taking a deep breath, I walked up to the cheery red door, and opened it.
Everything was clean and as it had been before the violation of my home. The clean up crew had come in and removed any evidence of my mother's death and the chaos her killer had left behind. Keeping my eyes trained straight ahead toward the stairs I took my first step into the house after a whole week. The same floorboard creaked as I laid my foot on the rug in front of the door.
I kept my eyes away from the doorway to the kitchen even though I knew I wouldn't see her body lying on the floor in a pool of her own blood and...I cut that thought off even before the images popped into my head. The nightmares were bad enough, I didn't need to see the horror even when I was awake. Shaking my head, I hurried for the stairs but paused when I caught sight of sunlight gleaming off of polished wood. I turned and slowly walked into the living room, my eyes glued to that shine of sunlight hitting polished wood.
I stopped in front of Mom's piano, tears blurring my vision as I reached out to touch the cover. It was a beautiful old upright of mahogany, a gift from grandmother when I was little. There was no way I could part with this, it held too many happy memories.
A warm hand on my shoulder made me jump and spin around to find Davis standing behind me. I hadn't even heard him come in. His eyes weren't on me but on the piano, his eyes blurred like mine with unshed tears. "You can't leave this here, it'll just go on auction and I know Debra wouldn't have wanted that." He whispered, his voice gruff with his suppressed emotions. I turned back to the piano and ran my fingers over the polished surface as I nodded. No way in hell was I leaving it here.
"I'm sure Sam won't mind too much. I could always keep it in a garage if he has one." Turning away from the piano I kept my eyes on the carpet as I mounted the steps and hurried up to my room. I didn't even really look as I grabbed things from my closet and dresser, stuffing everything in suitcases, both mine and my mother's. I would have to pay a little extra for the shipping but I didn't care. I no doubt had plenty money saved up.
Davis helped me drag everything downstairs, mumbling about putting most of my mother's stuff in a storage for me if I ever wanted it. I moved in a daze now that I was out of the house, not really paying attention to anything anyone said or where I was being taken. I barely noticed when Davis hugged me and told me to call him when I landed. Landed? Oh yeah, the plane. Normally I'm terrified of heights, it freaked me out being over three stories high but my grief was catching up with me now that I didn't have any planning to do. I kept my cool on the plane till I got up to go to the bathroom. In the tiny stall I let the tears flow a little at a time or else I feared it would never stop.
- 00 - 00 -
In Seattle airport I got my carry-on bag, the rest of my things were being shipped by a moving service, and hailed a taxi. In the backseat I handed the driver the address and tossed him a hundred dollar bill to get him going when he started protesting. The ride was long and boring, I mostly sat curled up on the back bench with my earbuds playing loud rock music. Normally I would have listened to classical to think of dances to preform for mother but...I would never be doing that ever again. So, rock music drowned out my thoughts and let me forget a little about what had happened. It was so loud it even kept away the nightmares...
A hand touching my shoulder made me jerk, whipping my head up to see the driver standing in the open back car door. It was raining heavily outside of the car. I must have dozed off at some point in the drive. I blinked at the driver and realized he was talking.
"This is the place, I even asked around and Sam Uley lives here." He stood up, an umbrella sheltering him from the rain, as he glanced around. "No one seems to be home, are you sure you want to stay here? Is there someone you can contact?"
A small smile spread across my face, it felt foreign and strange to smile after so long. Well, not long only a week but it felt like forever. I carefully climbed out of the backseat and winced when the blood rushed back into my legs. I definitely been sitting too long. As I climbed out, I glanced back at the digital clock on the driver's radio. It was only a little after seven, my flight had been early by a couple hours. Maybe Sam wasn't home? Or, had he even gotten Davis's letter?
"Yeah, I have my cell phone so I'll be okay." I told the driver, only half of a lie.
He looked a little relieved but also a little unconvinced. "Whatever, you do what you want." He walked around to the trunk and retrieved my carry-on bag. I forwent pulling up the long handle and just carried it up the little porch. At least my stuff wouldn't get wet. I stood on the porch and watched the taxi drive away, leaving me stranded in a place completely foreign to me. Sitting on the porch, I removed my tennis shoes and socks. Lowering my feet to the muddy ground I felt the cold, icy rain fall on my feet and bare lower legs. The wood of the porch was cold under my exposed thighs thanks to my shorts. I should have changed into pants on the flight but I had been too tired and didn't feel like it. Lately I hadn't felt like doing anything.
But the feeling of rain on my skin and mud under my felt made me want to dance. Something I hadn't felt like doing in a whole week. Mom had always loved winter time in California because we got more rain storms. She would drag me out in the rain to dance in the park just down the street. We didn't care if we got sick, it was just a rare fun thing to do.
A tear, hot and thick and salty fell from my eye to streak a path down my cheek to quiver on the underside of my chin. Never again would she feel the patter of rain on her skin or mud under her toes as she pirouetted in a cold shower of droplets. Standing up in a rush, I threw back my head and let the rain course over me. The feeling was akin to a cold cleansing. It mingled with the single tear on my face and washed it away, replacing the heat with a bone chilling cold.
The urge to dance called stronger, I even began to raise my arms to chest level for the beginning position of a pirouette, but the sound of raindrops hitting an umbrella made me drop my arms and stare in the direction of the sound. A woman, of Native American descent, was walking up the little road that led to the house. She had her head down and was fiddling with a ring of keys as she walked. When she finally looked up she gasped and nearly dropped her keys. My eyes instantly were caught by the scars on the right side of her face but they didn't bother me. After what I had seen that dark day, nothing would frighten me or sicken me every again.
"Can I help you?" She asked, shouting over the rain. She hurried over, her dark eyes going from my bare feet to my soaked hair.
"I'm looking for Sam Uley, um did he get a letter in the last couple of days?" The words tumbled out as I blushed. Now that I was actually here, in another state, this seemed like a really stupid idea. I should have just stayed with Davis. Realization dawned in her dark eyes as well as some emotion I couldn't read.
"You must be Simone, I'm so sorry for your loss." She reached out hand to touch my shoulder, the warmth of her skin surprised me. She felt like she had been somewhere warm and dry recently, someone else's house maybe? "Come on, let's get out of the rain." She led me up to the door and deftly unlocked it. This must be Sam's fiance. Again, that feeling of guilt welled up for pressing myself on Sam and his life but I tamped it down with my selfishness. I was too much of a coward to live alone.
The woman walked into the house and flipped on a light. The house was larger then I had first thought, it was comfy and cozy with all of the furniture being made from wood and the colors were dark and rich. Leaving me by the door, Sam's fiance dashed into a room down a hall and quickly returned with a warm smile on her lips.
"Sam got Officer Branson's letter but we didn't think you'd come so quickly. I had just finished up preparing the extra room for you. Sam is away on tribal business." She explained, her voice soft and nurturing, very much like my mother's when she was trying to make someone comfortable. It made tears gather but I willed them away and gave the woman a wane smile.
"I'm Emily and if ever you need anything just ask me. The bathroom is down the hall, the first door on the left, and the room you'll be staying in is the first door on the right. Mine and Sam's room is at the end of the hall." She led me along as she spoke, pointing at the rooms. I drug my bag behind me, nodding absently as I followed her. A shower sounded really great right now.
"Um, can I take a shower?" I asked, now I was nervous about living with total strangers. But I couldn't back out now, could I?
"Of course," Emily walked over to a tall cupboard in the hall. "Here are the towels and washcloths, just leave your wet clothes in the sink and I'll wash them for you." She gave me a soft smile, which was an interesting sight thanks to her scars, but I was already getting used to the sight. She left me there and headed down the way we had come to what could only be the kitchen.
I entered my room and looked around. It was a simple thing, with wood furniture and a little closet. The bed was made with a simple white sheet and a beautiful Indian blanket draped over the bed. I left my bag at the foot of the bed and grabbed two towels from the cupboard. In the bathroom, I paused to take in the rug on the floor and simple white shower curtain with blue flower trimming. A far cry from Mom's wildly colored bathroom.
Stripping, I left my clothes in the sink and stepped into the shower, turning on the hot water. Mindful of how long I was in there, I didn't want to use up Sam's hot water, I took a quick shower just to wash off the mud and the cold rain water. The feeling of the hot water was like another form of cleansing, this one putting heat into my body when it had been cold for a long time. I was shocked by how long it had been since I actually felt warm and comfortable.
I wrapped my body in the thick towel and put up my hair turban style. Opening the door, I peeked around the corner to see Emily's shadow moving about in the kitchen. I quickly darted across the hall to my bedroom and changed into my pajamas, a simple cotton t-shirt and fleece sleeping pants. With my hair still up in it's towel turban, I padded out to the kitchen and stood watching Emily. She was baking what looked like muffins and some cookies but enough to feed a small army!
"What are those for?" I asked.
She looked up and gave me a warm smile, making my heart ache. "I cook for some local boys that don't have time to eat on normal times." She glanced up at a clock mounted on the wall and frowned, "are you hungry? You can have some, I doubt you had time to eat during everything." I was a little hungry but now that I had taken a shower, I was more tired then I was hungry. So, I just shook my head.
"I think I'll just go to bed, if that okay with you. I'm really tired."
"Of course, I'll save you some breakfast so don't worry about getting up early or anything. Night Simone." Those two simple words made the tears gather but I held it together as I gave her a small nod and calmly walked to the room that was now mine. The tears only started flowing after I had shut the door. I was tempted to lean against the door and fall into a sobbing heap at the door but I managed to crawl under the beautiful blanket, after removing my mother's stuffed bear from my bag, and let myself cry myself to sleep. My last thought before I drifted off was...what was my life going to be like now?
Sad, I know, but it gets better. I dedicate this story to my best friend who has just lost her mother, through natural causes, but it's no less painful. The woman herself was like a second mother to me so I too am grieving the loss of her passing by writing this story.
I listened to Darcy's Letter from the Pride and Prejudice soundtrack. http/www(dot)youtube(dot)com/watch?v=aL6oZDB2nTo