A/N: So I heard this song on the radio, which prompted me to write this fic. It also prompted me to write a Klaine song list, which will each have it's own fic.
For those of you waiting, so very patiently, for the sequel to It Ain't Hard Trying, I am working on it. I've just been swarmed with other ideas that didn't fit that story and I'm blanking when I start to write it. Also look for an AU of mine to come out some time in the next month (I hope).
Story: Higher
Summary: As Blaine sings, he remembers. As he sings, Kurt listens.
Rating: I guess T, for a curse word somewhere in here. And a vague sex reference.
Warnings: Angst and fluff.
Disclaimer: I don't own them. Don't sue me. I have no money. Also I do not own the song which is Come On, Get Higher by Matt Nathanson
Blaine walked around in the empty choir room, looking around. It's different than he remembered it, somehow it seemed less magically than it had that moment he had stepped into the room. That moment six years ago when he walked away from his life and straight into the life of the boy he knew he'd love forever. He wondered, as he idly played with a guitar, if anyone else had been back here. If Rachel or Finn or if even Puck had stood here and remembered. He picked up the guitar, checking around the room. It was late, no one should be here anymore. No one would hear him now.
He sat down in his chair, the chair he had managed to occupy the entire year he had spent in this room. Sitting with his hands linked with the most amazing, perfect boy he'd ever met.
I miss the sound of your voice
And I miss the rush of your skin
And I miss the still of the silence
As you breathe out and I breathe in
If I could walk on water
If I could tell you what's next
Make you believe
Make you forget
He hadn't noticed the tears until one hit the wood of the guitar. Blaine remembered as if it was yesterday, the sound of Kurt's voice as he stood in front of them all and sang. Of the look on his face when he sung his very first love song to someone who wanted... Needed to hear it. He remembered every vivid detail of the first time seeing Kurt, naked and writhing under him. He remembered the way his skin felt under his fingertips, how it flushed with color right before he came. How he'd felt like he wanted to breathe in Kurt, to bury him inside himself and never let him go.
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire in the swing of your hips
Just throw me down hard
And drown me in love
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire in the swing of your hips
Just throw me down hard
And drown me in love
Blaine voice broke, cracking as the memories flooded in. He'd spent years mapping and memorizing Kurt flesh. He knew every inch of Kurt's flawless skin and tight muscles. He knew all the sounds that he made, the expressions he had, the way he simply fell apart at Blaine's touch.
He remembered the way his eyes lit up when Blaine bought him a gift. The crinkle of his brow when he was thinking too hard. The way he smiled when he thought no one was looking. He remembered it all.
I miss the sound of your voice
The loudest thing in my head
And I ache to remember
All the violent, sweet,
Perfect words that you said
If I could walk on water
If I could tell you what's next
Make you believe
Make you forget
Blaine's tears became sobs as he remembered the way Kurt's face twisted in anger. He ached with everything he was as he remembered the words, the fight, the moment they couldn't take back. He had never wanted this, he had wanted forever with Kurt. But it had been broken and even though the words had been harsh and breaking, they had still been in that same voice Blaine had grown to love. The voice that lived in his head, that told him of all the ways he had fucked things up.
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire in the swing of your hips
Just throw me down hard
And drown me in love
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire in the swing of your hips
Just throw me down hard
And drown me in love
Some things you just can't come back from. Blaine had known that the moment they had started fighting, the moment the words had left their mouths. Some things you just don't heal. When he had packed his things and left, it was the single hardest thing he'd ever done. But he had sworn the moment he'd met Kurt that he would protect him. He had never imagined it would have been from himself. And even though every inch of Blaine belonged to Kurt, he couldn't have stayed. Kurt hadn't wanted him to.
I miss the pull of your heart
I can taste the sparks on your tongue
I see angels and devils
And God
When you come on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on- HOLD
Singing shalala la
Singing shalala la
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire in the swing of your hips
Just throw me down hard
And drown me in love
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire in the swing of your hips
Just throw me down hard
And drown me in love
From the doorway, Kurt watched. He hadn't really planned on following Blaine here. He had intended to let this end, to break them forever and never look back. But the moments without Blaine had become too hard and he had followed. He hadn't, until the moment he had heard Blaine sing, decided if he was following to make amends or get the final closure. Then the words were coming and it was the same, sweet voice that had made Kurt fall in love with him so many years ago. The same voice that sang to him in front of the school, the voice that sang to him when he was sad or sick, and even if he hated it, the same voice that had yelled at him.
It's all wrong
It's all wrong
It's all right
So, come on, get higher,
Come on, get higher
'cause everything works
Everything works in your arms.
There was a silence that stretched between them. While Blaine sat, unaware of Kurt's presence, Kurt stood waiting for his own courage to step into the room. As the silence stretched, filled only by the soft sobs coming from Blaine, Kurt remembered. They had fought before, but this time had been different from the beginning. Blaine had always had a jealous streak, he and Kurt used to joke that it was his greatest flaw. Kurt hadn't realized there was a breaking point to it, a point where Blaine would not be able to see past his own jealousy. He had accused Kurt, said horrible things, and Kurt had fought him the whole time. When the fighting was done, they both could feel that something had broke. Blaine had left and Kurt had cried. For hours, he cried and he waited for something. Then, it had hit him. He hadn't wanted this, he didn't want Blaine gone. He loved Blaine, Blaine had every inch of Kurt. "I figured I would find you here," he said, leaning against the doorframe.
Blaine looked up, eyes wide with shock. Tears streamed down his face and when he spoke, his voice cracked. "Kurt?"
"You used our joint account to book your flight," Kurt said. "I followed the day after." He didn't ask Blaine what he had done yesterday, while Kurt had still been chasing. He'd probably gone to see David and Wes. "You still sing beautifully. It's been a while since you have."
Blaine looked down at the guitar in his arms and sat it down beside him. "Why did you come here?"
"Truthfully, until a moment ago, I hadn't been sure. I had left New York wanting you back. I had landed in Ohio wanting to end it for good." Kurt moved into the room but didn't go over to Blaine. He stood at the edge of the piano. "It wasn't until you sang that I made up my mind."
"Don't I get a say in this?"
Kurt smiled. "When have I ever let you have a say?" He had hoped the joke would make Blaine smile, but it seemed to only remind him of more memories and Blaine cried more tears. "I wanted to say something. Something I hadn't been thinking clearly enough to say before now." Blaine nodded his head for Kurt to continue. "You have a huge problem. Your jealousy has always been an issue, but ever since you put this ring on my finger, it's been insane. It's almost as if you have been searching for any slight reason to think that I might be cheating on you."
"I..."
"I don't want your explanations Blaine," Kurt said and Blaine looked down at his hands. "I thought I needed them, but I just realized I don't. You've spent six years telling me you weren't good enough for me. You've spent six years expecting to wake up and find that I've realized that. What you don't realize is that I've spent six years thinking of nothing and no one but you."
Blaine looked up at Kurt. "Kurt..."
In the next second, Kurt was kneeling in front of Blaine. His right hand rested on the other's knee, keeping him steady. His left hand reached up to cup Blaine's face and Blaine caught the flash of white gold as he did. "I love you Blaine Anderson. I've loved you since the moment I saw you standing at the bottom of those stairs. Since the moment you sang Teenage Dream. I remember every second of the time I've spent with you since then. I never once wondered if I was missing something because you were the only person I'd ever been with. I never once wondered if I'd find someone better for me. You get me Blaine, like no one ever could. You understand my diva moments and you laugh when I'm being utterly ridiculous. You don't understand my fashion statements, but you always notice the small details of them. You can be perfectly content listening to me ramble on and on about whatever is on my mind, from Disney movies to Broadway shows to the latest gossip. You've never once made me feel silly or stupid or ashamed for being exactly who I am. Since the moment you walked into my life, you've accepted me just as me. You've never asked me to changed. You've seen every inch of me, inside and out, and you've loved everything. You ask for nothing and you give me so much."
"Kurt... You..."
Kurt moved his hand, placing a finger over Blaine's lips. "What you've failed to realize, in all the time you've been spending making sure that you accepted me, is that I've done the same for you. I know you Blaine Anderson, better than anyone else in your life. I've seen you at your best moments and you worst. I've seen you happy and sad, I've seen you get angry until you can't think straight. I've seen every inch of you, inside and out, and I love everything. I could never want you to be anything more or less than what you are. The person who yelled at me, who accused me of being a whore, that person wasn't you. You should have said something and I should have realized earlier, how scared you were. Scared that asking me to marry you was going to push me away from you. If you had just told me, I would have told you that all I want, for the rest of my life, is to be with you. You are my everything Blaine, I couldn't live without you."
Kurt was crying now too and Blaine could taste the salt when he kissed Kurt. Sparks, the same sparks they'd had six years ago, erupted between them as they kissed. "I love you," he whispered against Kurt's lips. "I'm so sorry and you are right. I've been terrified that asking you to marry me was too soon and you were going to leave me. I've been scared that you would realize I'm the only person you've ever been with and there might be someone else out there better suited for you."
Kurt stood, pulling Blaine with him, and wrapped his arms around Blaine's waist. Blaine rested his head on Kurt's chest, seeking comfort he'd been missing for days. "You complete me Blaine," Kurt whispered. "And I'm willing to spend the rest of my life making you see that. I love you, you own my heart."
"You own mine," Blaine whispered. "Everything in me belongs to you."
"Will you marry me?" Kurt pulled away and in his hand was a small box. "You've asked me and I've said yes. But do you want to marry me Blaine?"
Blaine took the ring, a perfect match to the one he had bought Kurt, and slipped it on. "I've never wanted anything more," he whispered and kissed Kurt again.