Author's note.
Hello everyone reading this. This is my first serious fic. The other one shows me at my craziest and I hope that this one can be the opposite. Humor is easier, in my opinion, to write than drama. So I hope you understand that this most likely won't be the best thing you've ever read. But I'll do my best to make it good. Thank you very much to Lilliana for the help on coming up with ideas for this fic. You have no idea how much you help me. And also Chocki aka Freebs for betaing this fic. Holie too! I get 2! I'm special!
This fic will be written as different POVs. Mostly the women. Why? Because I'm making this written as journal entries. I just see that as more of a girly thing. But I will include the men, don't you worry.
Disclamer: I don't own any of the characters. Which is good, because if I did, the show wouldn't be as good. I think that TPTB do a good enough job. But there are some things they could change.
Of course, that is just my opinion.
Setting: Season nine, right before Kisangani.
*~*Abby*~*
I can't believe I'm writing in a diary. Me. It's so... out of character. But I got this... urge. Urge to write. In the middle of watching the news. It had a story about an accident on the highway. A few people died. They didn't come to County, but I heard that and realized that I don't want to die, like those people, with nothing to be remembered by. So I scavenged around my apartment, looking for some kind of notebook and I found this. I've had this for so long. The previous pages hold my previous attempts at putting my feelings on paper. Here's yet another. Maybe I'll actually write more than once. Unlikely, but it could happen.
Today, was not one of the best days. Carter and I still aren't talking. He's become so, I don't know. Distant. He doesn't tell me anything anymore. I guess he's been through a lot recently. But he can turn to me. Why doesn't he? I used to be the troubled one, the one who wields secrets. He's taken over that role.
I care about him so much. I didn't show it, but it was there. Now everything we've built up between us is crumbling. And I don't know how to stop it.
I can't dwell on Carter any longer. I already do that too much. What else is going on? Sure, there's always Eric and Maggie, but I'm not going there. Not now.
Maybe work- I should write about work. I'm always there. My life is my job. It was busy, no surprise there. Not very eventful. The odd trauma. Mostly stomach aches and the same old cuts and scrapes. Not much fun there.
Ooh. Fear Factor is on. It's sad, what people will do for money. I could never go on that show. 50 000 dollars to eat some uncooked animal part? And there are the taxes too! I'd never do it. But it is entertaining, I'll give you that. Carter hates these reality shows. Once he said something about the horsemen of the apocalypse. Carter. How did I get back to Carter. I don't want to think about him anymore. I'd rather give my undivided attention to Fear Factor.
{*}Elizabeth{*}
Here I am. Writing in this journal. Mark gave it to me. I just found it and I figured that it should be put to good use. Ella's asleep and I was cleaning up. The house is so quiet right now. It's the perfect situation to write like this. Hopefully there will be no interruptions.
To no surprise, Ella woke up. Right as I write the word interruptions, she seemed to read my mind and cry out. Murphy's law. Well, she's back in bed and I figure that I should continue with this.
Today was quite uneventful at the hospital. Not much happened. Out of the ordinary, that is. I like it. Routine. It's very simple. Knowing what will happen next. I guess that at the back of my mind, I know that something can happen, but it doesn't seem to be that way. Nothing weird has happened for awhile and I want it to stay that way.
Robert. I feel so bad for that man. Nothing is going right for him. Since the accident, nothing has been the same for him. For God's sakes, he lost his job. Possibly the one thing that he loved the most, has been taken away from him. But he hasn't lost me. The feelings between us aren't mutual, but I can be his friend. I can be there for him.
Oh, look at the time- 11 and I have a shift tomorrow morning. I guess that I should stop here then. I wonder how people end these things?
^*^ Susan ^*^
I'm writing again, sorry for the break, but I've been busy. Work and stuff. You know. I got home and was going to go to sleep right away, but I saw my little notebook, sitting on the desk. I couldn't resist. I had to write, even if nothing really happened today. At work, there was nothing out of the ordinary. It was boring. I like interesting things. Interesting patients make the day go by a bit faster. Since the day was so ordinary and I didn't feel like treating some hypochondriac that shows up twice a week, I took my coffee break at the same time as Abby. Just to talk. Girl stuff. But she seemed distracted. We usually have great conversations, but today Abby stared out of Doc's window, and said barely a word. I tried so many topics, but none worked. She'd just nod while I yap my head off, looking like an idiot. I think I'm going to take my coffee breaks alone. Better than with her. Or anyone else. Maybe I should walk around with a coffee all day and actually treat the hypochondriacs. Or something like that. I don't know how you can actually treat a hypochondriac. But I mean that I should stop forcing them upon Gallant. That's what I'll do. Next shift.
Hmm. What else happened today. Nothing. Wow. My life is so exciting. Why do I even bother to write this stuff down. It's a waste of effort, writing something you know that know one should ever read. Why do I write? I think it's because I don't want to disappear in the midst of everyone else. Maybe this is my... legacy. No, not legacy. I don't know. Something. I want to have something.
All this thinking has made me even more exhausted, if that's posssible. I'm going to sleep.
***
There. That was quite difficult. Actually, more like long. But I like it so far, and I'm going to keep going. I really like reviews. If you review, say what you think. The truth won't hurt me. This is my first attempt at a serious fic, so I want comments. And tell me if you like it. I value your opinion. ~Sammie.
Hello everyone reading this. This is my first serious fic. The other one shows me at my craziest and I hope that this one can be the opposite. Humor is easier, in my opinion, to write than drama. So I hope you understand that this most likely won't be the best thing you've ever read. But I'll do my best to make it good. Thank you very much to Lilliana for the help on coming up with ideas for this fic. You have no idea how much you help me. And also Chocki aka Freebs for betaing this fic. Holie too! I get 2! I'm special!
This fic will be written as different POVs. Mostly the women. Why? Because I'm making this written as journal entries. I just see that as more of a girly thing. But I will include the men, don't you worry.
Disclamer: I don't own any of the characters. Which is good, because if I did, the show wouldn't be as good. I think that TPTB do a good enough job. But there are some things they could change.
Of course, that is just my opinion.
Setting: Season nine, right before Kisangani.
*~*Abby*~*
I can't believe I'm writing in a diary. Me. It's so... out of character. But I got this... urge. Urge to write. In the middle of watching the news. It had a story about an accident on the highway. A few people died. They didn't come to County, but I heard that and realized that I don't want to die, like those people, with nothing to be remembered by. So I scavenged around my apartment, looking for some kind of notebook and I found this. I've had this for so long. The previous pages hold my previous attempts at putting my feelings on paper. Here's yet another. Maybe I'll actually write more than once. Unlikely, but it could happen.
Today, was not one of the best days. Carter and I still aren't talking. He's become so, I don't know. Distant. He doesn't tell me anything anymore. I guess he's been through a lot recently. But he can turn to me. Why doesn't he? I used to be the troubled one, the one who wields secrets. He's taken over that role.
I care about him so much. I didn't show it, but it was there. Now everything we've built up between us is crumbling. And I don't know how to stop it.
I can't dwell on Carter any longer. I already do that too much. What else is going on? Sure, there's always Eric and Maggie, but I'm not going there. Not now.
Maybe work- I should write about work. I'm always there. My life is my job. It was busy, no surprise there. Not very eventful. The odd trauma. Mostly stomach aches and the same old cuts and scrapes. Not much fun there.
Ooh. Fear Factor is on. It's sad, what people will do for money. I could never go on that show. 50 000 dollars to eat some uncooked animal part? And there are the taxes too! I'd never do it. But it is entertaining, I'll give you that. Carter hates these reality shows. Once he said something about the horsemen of the apocalypse. Carter. How did I get back to Carter. I don't want to think about him anymore. I'd rather give my undivided attention to Fear Factor.
{*}Elizabeth{*}
Here I am. Writing in this journal. Mark gave it to me. I just found it and I figured that it should be put to good use. Ella's asleep and I was cleaning up. The house is so quiet right now. It's the perfect situation to write like this. Hopefully there will be no interruptions.
To no surprise, Ella woke up. Right as I write the word interruptions, she seemed to read my mind and cry out. Murphy's law. Well, she's back in bed and I figure that I should continue with this.
Today was quite uneventful at the hospital. Not much happened. Out of the ordinary, that is. I like it. Routine. It's very simple. Knowing what will happen next. I guess that at the back of my mind, I know that something can happen, but it doesn't seem to be that way. Nothing weird has happened for awhile and I want it to stay that way.
Robert. I feel so bad for that man. Nothing is going right for him. Since the accident, nothing has been the same for him. For God's sakes, he lost his job. Possibly the one thing that he loved the most, has been taken away from him. But he hasn't lost me. The feelings between us aren't mutual, but I can be his friend. I can be there for him.
Oh, look at the time- 11 and I have a shift tomorrow morning. I guess that I should stop here then. I wonder how people end these things?
^*^ Susan ^*^
I'm writing again, sorry for the break, but I've been busy. Work and stuff. You know. I got home and was going to go to sleep right away, but I saw my little notebook, sitting on the desk. I couldn't resist. I had to write, even if nothing really happened today. At work, there was nothing out of the ordinary. It was boring. I like interesting things. Interesting patients make the day go by a bit faster. Since the day was so ordinary and I didn't feel like treating some hypochondriac that shows up twice a week, I took my coffee break at the same time as Abby. Just to talk. Girl stuff. But she seemed distracted. We usually have great conversations, but today Abby stared out of Doc's window, and said barely a word. I tried so many topics, but none worked. She'd just nod while I yap my head off, looking like an idiot. I think I'm going to take my coffee breaks alone. Better than with her. Or anyone else. Maybe I should walk around with a coffee all day and actually treat the hypochondriacs. Or something like that. I don't know how you can actually treat a hypochondriac. But I mean that I should stop forcing them upon Gallant. That's what I'll do. Next shift.
Hmm. What else happened today. Nothing. Wow. My life is so exciting. Why do I even bother to write this stuff down. It's a waste of effort, writing something you know that know one should ever read. Why do I write? I think it's because I don't want to disappear in the midst of everyone else. Maybe this is my... legacy. No, not legacy. I don't know. Something. I want to have something.
All this thinking has made me even more exhausted, if that's posssible. I'm going to sleep.
***
There. That was quite difficult. Actually, more like long. But I like it so far, and I'm going to keep going. I really like reviews. If you review, say what you think. The truth won't hurt me. This is my first attempt at a serious fic, so I want comments. And tell me if you like it. I value your opinion. ~Sammie.