Blanket warning: This is Portamis, but it's incredibly tame. Lots of hugging and some bed sharing, calling each other boyfriend, some later kissing, but nothing R rated happens. There is a hint that something happens in later chapters, but I will warn ahead of time. You won't see anything happening though.

Italics denote a memory.

This is complete and posted over on Ao3 if you want to read it in its entirety over there. I am Snow_Glory over on Ao3 :) Otherwise, I will try to post every couple of days :)

March 9, 2016 - Police Precinct - Athos, Porthos and Captain Treville

It was the stuff of nightmares watching your boyfriend get jabbed in the neck with a tranquilizer dart, and get dragged out of the local hospital wearing scrubs with fluffy bunnies all over them.

There was no sound on the surveillance video, and Porthos felt as though he was watching one of those old silent movies, only there were no subtitles to help the detectives understand what was going on. Athos, Porthos and Treville had ensconced themselves in his large office and had watched the video over and over looking for clues.

Every time they started the video from the beginning Porthos hoped it would end differently. He prayed he wouldn't see his lover slam through the emergency doors or yank on the emergency sprinkler system lever, and most of all that Aramis wouldn't stop dead shortly after, seeing what was waiting in front of him. Porthos watched wishing that the entire emergency room wasn't on fire and that there were not several men dressed all in black, slowly surrounding Aramis.

Porthos clenched his fists in anger as his boyfriend, once again, glanced quickly at the cameras mounted on the wall, pure unadulterated fear sparkling in his eyes.

When they had first heard the news of the hospital on fire Porthos had been worried for his boyfriend. The particular precinct that Athos and Porthos worked at wasn't in the area of the hospital, so they hadn't been called upon to help in the investigation. Instead, the remaining officers that weren't on patrol had gathered around to watch the news broadcast on the event. The news had reported that there were no casualties and Porthos had breathed a sigh of relief, retreating to his office to check his phone for any incoming messages from Aramis. He hadn't even reached his office when his captain, Treville, had raced out of his office and pulled both Athos and himself in.

It was behind closed doors that Treville explained that the local police were reporting an abduction of one of the hospital's nurses. And to Porthos' growing dread, that particular nurse that was missing was his long-time boyfriend, Aramis. Treville had pulled some strings and had gotten a copy of the surveillance video en route to their office.

When he saw the video Porthos' first comment had been that he hadn't remembered Aramis grabbing those particular scrubs that morning. Athos had just stared at him worried until the situation had permeated into his brain and that is when the real panic began. Porthos had all but quit his job in his attempt to get to the hospital, intent on reaching Aramis. Treville, the precinct's Captain, had closed the door to the office and sat Porthos down, and threatened to lock his detective up if he wouldn't calm down.

Porthos sighed and leaned back against his Captain's desk. Treville was seated on the other side of the table watching the video alongside Athos, looking for any clue to aid them in finding their missing Aramis. Treville had been with the police force a long time and Porthos knew that it was just as upsetting that Aramis had been abducted to Treville as the rest them. Aramis looked to Treville as a surrogate father ever since he lost his own years ago and could often be found visiting the precinct between shifts at the hospital.

"Rewind that one part again Athos, please," Treville asked.

"Did you see something, sir?" Athos responded, rewinding the video a couple of frames.

Porthos drowned out Treville's response, staring intently at the screen. While his two colleagues were looking for clues about what was going on, Porthos was watching Aramis' every move and expression.

"He's terrified," Porthos whispered. "Look! You can see his hands shaking there, and his eyes... they dart around the room frantically. Aramis... he doesn't like enclosed spaces. Those guys are surrounding him and he is panicking."

Athos pressed pause on the video and set the remote down in front of Treville. He moved forward and took Porthos into his arms, hugging him tightly, "We will find him Porthos, of that I am sure."

"They are speaking to him Athos. They are wearing masks, but you can see their body language and they are speaking to him, see? Right there!" Porthos pointed to the screen. "He is shaking his head no. What do you think they said to him?"

Athos and Porthos had been partners in the police force for seven years, starting out as beat cops and moving up the proverbial ladder swiftly to become detectives. The two of them combined had solved more cases than any other team and were one of the best detective teams at this specific precinct. If there was anyone better for the task of finding a missing person, it would be these two.

"Do you think this is related to our killer Athos?" Porthos asked.

For the past three months, a man or woman had been systematically murdering people and setting buildings on fire. The only similarities the two detectives had managed to find were the sex of the victims and the manner in which they were killed. The victims were all woman, all about 25 years of age and they all died by their throats cut open. They also were always found dead outside of a building as it burned to the ground. Sometimes the building had significant meaning to the deceased, sometimes not. Beyond that, the two detectives hadn't managed to link any of the victims to one another and hadn't managed to identify the killer. It was a case that had consumed the two detectives and often kept them at the precinct late at nights and through entire weekends. This morning had been the first time Porthos had been home long enough to have a conversation with Aramis, instead of swift kisses on the cheek as his boyfriend slept.

Porthos was shaking slightly in Athos' arms and his voice was extremely strained and he knew that the two of them were way too close to this case, and he wondered if Treville would pull them off it.

As if reading Porthos' mind, Treville walked around from behind his desk and pulled him out of Athos' arms and turned him around to face him. He gripped the man's shoulders firmly and sighed. "I am going to allow you both to look for Aramis. Something about his abduction and the fire set to the hospital rings familiar to me. Both of you look into similarities of our current arsons and murders and see if anything correlates. I will continue to analyze this video for clues; report to me as soon as you find anything."

Porthos nodded, steeling himself for the research that was impending and Athos smiled grimly.

"What do you think Athos?" Porthos voiced his concern again, as he was ushered out of the Captain's office and down the hallway towards the conference rooms. "Do you think it could be our killer?"

Athos sighed and ran his hand through his hair, which was getting too long again, "I don't know my friend, but... honestly? Aramis isn't the right age or the correct gender, and this whole thing doesn't fit the profile of our serial killer. The arson fits, but no one was killed today, plus our killer has never abducted anyone. This sounds like a whole new person, possibly with some link to Aramis, because I don't think it was random. Like you said, they had a conversation with Aramis first before shooting him with that tranquilizer dart."

"Not what I wanted to hear," Porthos growled menacingly, clenching his fists. Athos watched him stalk towards the conference room door and wrench it open.

"Porthos, we don't want this to be the same person! Everyone else from that case had ended up dead within hours."

"I will find him Athos, I refuse to find my best friend, my boyfri-" He paused with a choked cry. "... dead on some steps, bled out from the neck, not knowing what he really means to me."

Athos rushed forward and pulled a chair out for Porthos to collapse into and pressed his hands into his partner's shoulders. "I am almost positive this isn't the same person can't panic over Aramis dying like our other victims. This feels different."

Porthos took a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves, "I lied to you about our fight this morning Athos- we broke up. He left me and I think it's for good this time. I just need to find him; those things we said can't be the last things we ever say to each other." He swiped at the tears that had gathered in his eyes and nodded to Athos.

"He knows how much he means to you Porthos. What he needs right now isn't our panic or pity, he needs our strength and our determination to find him!"

"I forget you've known him as long as I have. Help me find our friend then?"

Athos nodded and settled on the floor amidst the file boxes that were strewn about the room. "I know we've gone through these a million times, but let's start at square one again? At least, they are highly organized so it should be fairly quick."

March 9, 2016 - Aramis and Porthos' house - The Breakup

"Aramis..." Porthos whined. He knew he sounded like a child pouting when he didn't get what he wanted, but he didn't care. "I never see you anymore."

He dodged to the side, flailing Aramis' shirt high above his boyfriend's head as the younger man launched himself, trying to reach his item of clothing.

"And whose fault is that? Have mercy Porthos, please. I am going to be late for work!"

Aramis was a paediatric nurse at the local hospital, He'd been at that hospital since he graduated from the nursing program at the neighbouring town's University. He'd chosen to specialize in paediatrics after his bachelor's degree and worked both at the hospital and took extra courses at the University. He'd already been a paediatrics nurse for two years when Porthos had met him.

"Skip work."

"No."

"I won't give you your scrubs."

Porthos loved teasing Aramis. His boyfriend was so easy to rile, ornery as a cat, clingy as a kitten; Aramis would run through a range of emotions, begging and pleading, and would usually resort to using his charm to get at whatever Porthos was withholding. It usually ended with them wrestling for whatever they were battling over and both of them having forgotten what the initial argument was about.

Not today, though...

Today, Porthos was frustrated and wanted attention, and Aramis was in a foul mood and unwilling to play along.

Aramis scowled and huffed, shoulders drooping in what Porthos assumed was defeat. "I don't understand what your deal is..." The half-naked man stopped trying to wrestle his shirt from Porthos' grip and wandered to the dresser drawers, pulling out a long sleeve black shirt. He slipped it over his head and pulled it on and then grabbed another scrub shirt from the drawer below, pulling that on as well. "It's not as though you have been around. I've hardly seen you in three months. I am tired of spending the nights alone, so I signed up for extra shifts at the hospital. What gives with your attitude today?"

"You spend more time with d'Artagnan than you do with me."

It was while Aramis was taking one of his classes at the University, that he met d'Artagnan, a young man completing his Masters to become a counsellor. When they both graduated, d'Artagnan had followed Aramis and become the patient counsellor for the hospital. Athos and Porthos had met Aramis and d'Artagnan when responding to a 911 call at a nearby coffee house. There had been an altercation between two men outside of the coffee house, ending when the one man had shot the other. When both Athos and Porthos arrived, they'd been impressed by the young nurse trying to save the victim's life but had quickly lost sight of him in the hustle and bustle of the scene and arriving emergency teams.

It was a couple of days later when Athos, having had enough of Porthos' pining over some unknown guy, had broken policies and procedures and ran a search on the young nurse through the police database. Porthos hadn't expected Athos to find much but was surprised when it brought up a sealed file of an event that happened a couple of years before. Due to the file being sealed by the courts Porthos was only able to find out that the man, Aramis, had been the first responder at a mass murder in which there were no survivors. Thankfully the file still contained the nurse's most recent contact information, but before Porthos could work up the nerve to contact the man, Aramis had shown up at the precinct looking for Treville. Porthos would always label it as fate afterwards, the chance meeting between Aramis and himself. They'd gone out on a single date and hadn't looked back.

"I work with d'Artagnan, Porthos. It's common for me to see him on a daily basis and besides, you have been so busy with your work and that arsonist case that I barely see you."

"I just have a bad feeling about today," Porthos finally admitted. "Honestly, stay home with me? It's close to the anniversary of that Savoy Massacre. You could show me your scrapbook and we can see if there are any more clues as to what happened there?"

Porthos could see immediately that had been the wrong thing to bring up. Aramis paled and backed away slightly, crossing his arms over his chest. He glanced over to the stained glass cross hanging near the window. It'd been there ever since Aramis moved in and he would often find his boyfriend staring at it longingly. Porthos always wondered what the meaning of the cross was, but Aramis shut him down every time he asked.

"But you want no part of that day?" Aramis asked puzzled. "You've never wanted to know what happened."

"Even mentioning that day sends you into a tailspin. See, you are barely keeping it together!" Aramis was shaking and nervous, fiddling with the hem of his clothing. He looked so vulnerable, that Porthos instantly regretted bringing up the conversation.

Ever since Good Friday seven years ago; his boyfriend had kept a scrapbook of events of that day. Any news or mentions were added once a year to the book and it had become quite comprehensive. If Porthos were being honest, the scrapbook and the events of that day terrified him, because every year around that time Aramis became obsessive and paranoid about everything. He would stress himself out, have nightmares and would be constantly distracted. It was why Porthos only allowed Aramis the book once a year and he, himself had never actually looked at it. He felt Aramis needed to move on and not dwell on the past.

Despite all that, Porthos had tried to support him until last year when his own fears had completely taken control and the inevitable happened. Porthos had left Aramis, floundering, just before Good Friday.

"No," Aramis whispered. "No, I am not ready to go down this road with you again. You knew when we started dating that I was broken and that I had secrets that I wasn't ready to tell. You were ok with this… you were ok! Up until you decided you were no longer ok with this. You panicked and left me…"

"This conversation escalated faster than I thought; let's stop ok?" Porthos moved forward to pull Aramis into his arms, but the man backed off and sat gingerly on the bed.

It was silent in the room for a moment and then Aramis took in a giant shuddering breath and continued, "Next to Savoy, you leaving me was the worst day of my life. It was as though you laid all my failures in life in a neat little row in front of us. Did I ever tell you it felt like an ultimatum? Choose you or my messed up life. I'd never hated someone so much in my life as I hated you in that very moment and considering everything I've been through that was saying a lot."

"That's not fair Aramis! You hadn't seen yourself, how crazed you were becoming over the whole situation. I couldn't watch you self-destruct anymore…"

"I was going to tell you everything that night," Aramis said softly, he sighed and picked up his shoulder bag, tossing a few things in he would need for work.

"And yet you didn't Aramis, you let me leave and then ran straight into Anne's arms. Our bed was barely cooled and you slept with her!" Porthos regretted the words as soon as they had left his lips, this conversation was taking a terrifying turn and he couldn't stop himself.

"I… let you leave? Get over yourself Porthos." Aramis cried, "Athos has already judged me enough for sleeping with her! I don't need your input as well."

Porthos moved forward and grabbed Aramis' hands bringing them to his chest, "Fair enough. That was callous of me to suggest that you had any choice in my leaving, but can't you see that she was waiting for that exact moment Aramis?"

Aramis ripped his hands out of the Porthos' grip and resumed his task of packing for work, "Don't you judge her either Porthos, she was there for me when you decided you didn't want to be anymore. She is still happily married to Louis, no harm was done."

"You don't even understand the pain you caused Aramis. Louis nearly divorced Anne; it's a wonder how he even managed to forgive her. She thought she was carrying your child for months and you were prepared to give up everything to provide for that child. You nearly destroyed yourself all for the fleeting chance to be a father."

Aramis laughed a harsh emotional bark that even Porthos stepped backwards from. "You have no right to judge me for things that happened after we broke up. But no, you are right, I destroy everything I touch. I destroy everything I love and eventually, I will destroy you." Aramis paused, glaring at Porthos, breathing heavily.

"Aramis, no…"

"Answer me this, why are we back together? What's the point of all this?"

"I love you! That's the point of this, we were meant to be together."

"And what if I told you, I already had met and lost the person I was meant to be with?"

It was meant to be a biting comment, and Porthos cringed as if he'd been struck. He stared open mouthed at his boyfriend, trying to find something to say and failed. Panic was beginning to creep into his heart, its sharp claws gripping and stretching throughout his chest. He paled when Aramis spoke again.

"My heart has been shredded to pieces over and over throughout my life, what is one more tear? One more rend to a heart that you realized a year ago was irreparable."

"Aramis… No." Porthos pleaded.

Aramis closed his eyes. "Porthos, this isn't working. That 3-month break between us broke us irrevocably… You are never home anymore, and that case is far more important than me. You know I noticed recently that the closer we get to Easter, the more hours you are putting in. There is too large a chasm between us to close and I hoped that I would at some point be able to get past things and finally tell you the whole story, but I realize now that I still don't trust you. You couldn't handle me at my worst; you only love me during my best." Aramis ran his hands through his unruly hair. "I won't be here when you get home."

"What! No, I'm sorry. Please don't do this!"

Aramis only grabbed his shoulder bag and silently padded from the room not looking back. Porthos barely heard the front door shut as he collapsed to the floor numb and in shock.

What had he just done?