In Which Finn Apologizes to Kurt
Summary: Finn feels like it's time to apologize to Kurt for all the things he's done over the past two years. About a week after Prom Queen. Oneshot.
A/N: Hello all, this is my first story here. I always thought Kurt deserved an apology from Finn about all the shitty things Finn's done over the years, and I'm too lazy to look for one so I wrote it instead, right after watching 1x01 when Kurt says "You threw pee balloons at me. You nailed my lawn furniture to my roof." I wrote it at about two o'clock in the morning as well, so I apologize if it's completely terrible. I don't think it is, but then again I once didn't know what the reason Paris Hilton is famous and rich is because her family owns the Hilton hotel chain. So I could be wrong. Don't go too easy though, if it's bad, let me know. Concrit and reviews much appreciated.
"Hey, Kurt! Wait up!"
Kurt stopped mid-stride and turned to face his step-brother. "What is it, Finn? I have a coffee date with Blaine and I haven't seen him in a week, so make it quick."
"Okay, well, I just… I wanted to…" Finn started. "Finn, I have about-" Kurt checked his watch "five minutes and then I'll be late unless I speed, which I'd really rather not do. So you can either stop your blathering and just spit it out now, or we can talk about this later, when I get home. Which will it be?"
"I guess… I guess home will be better." Finn stuttered. "It's really important though, so don't like, talk about Vogue or whatever for too long. I really don't know what gay dudes do… Just please try to get home a bit early, okay?"
"Fine, Finn, I will ignore your closet homophobia for the moment and we can speak when I get back. Also, 'gay dudes', as you so eloquently called us, don't always talk about Vogue. Seriously, have you been talking to Mercedes? It was one time. That girl can hold a grudge like no one else…" he trailed off, seeming to forget that Finn was there. Then, pivoting on his heel, he trotted to his truck, shoved it into drive, and took off.
Finn was left standing in the middle of McKinley High's parking lot next to the dumpsters he had dumped his step-brother into more than a year before, rubbing the back of his neck guiltily at the sight of them.
Finn leapt up at the sound of the front door slamming. "Kurt! Is that you?" He ran down the stairs.
"Yes, Finn, it is me. Don't stampede down the steps like that, you'll bring the house down, I just got the Prada scarf I've had my eye on for months, and if the house comes down then I will be forced to murder you. Now, what is it that you wanted to talk to me about?" Kurt said this all impatiently, but still secretly amused at his step-brothers actions.
"Uh… Well, um, I…" at Kurt's snappish words, Finn lost all the courage he had spent the last three hours gathering up. Suddenly, his 'little brother' was very scary.
When Kurt saw Finn visibly deflating, his demeanor noticeably softened and relaxed. "Okay, I'm sorry. I've just been on edge ever since prom, and there was a bunch of traffic on the way home, plus I had a French test today and I just know that I made a mistake, even though I can't remember what it was and…" Kurt realized he was starting to ramble.
"How about you just sit on the couch and I'll go get us some milk, okay? Then we can talk about whatever it is, and I'll do my best to keep my temper in check. Does that sound good?"
Nodding mutely, Finn promptly followed his step-brother's directions. About a minute later, Kurt walked into the living room with two glasses of milk, gave one to Finn, and sat down on the chair opposite Finn's couch. "First off… Is everything okay? I mean, is this something bad?" Kurt took a sip of his milk and sat back, ready to listen.
Finn shook his head and gulped from his glass with a loud slurping noise, ignoring Kurt's flinch at his poor manners. "No, I just…" Finn shot Kurt a look when he made to interrupt, telling him with his eyes that if he wasn't allowed to get this out without his train of thought being broken, it was never going to get out at all. Kurt shut up.
He took a deep breath, and then started again. "I just wanted to say, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry that I threw pee balloons at you, I'm sorry I didn't stop the guys when they nailed the lawn furniture to your roof, I'm sorry I threw you in the dumpster. I'm sorry I called you a f-. A f-fag. I feel disgusting just saying the word, but that's what I called you, and I hate myself for it. I'm sorry I didn't stop Karofsky. I'm sorry I didn't notice when he was picking on you; when he was torturing you. I'm sorry I didn't notice when you were losing weight because you were so scared that you were too busy looking over your shoulder to eat. I'm sorry I didn't notice when you started jumping at every single noise, and when someone came up behind you, and how you would flinch when everyone but your dad would touch you. I'm sorry I didn't find out about that fucking secret ballot and pound the kids that started it. I'm sorry I've been such a shitty, horrible brother.
"I'm sorry I haven't protected you, because even though you say you don't need it, and I know that you kind of don't, you still kind of do. Everyone needs to be protected sometimes. Even me, even Mercedes, hell, even Puck! I'm sorry I didn't live up to my promise to you at our parents' wedding. I should have. Because what I said was true. You have taught me more about being a man than anyone else I know. You don't care what other people think, you do what you know is right even when other people try to tear you down, and you stick up for the people that deserve it. You're such a better man than I am Kurt, and I really hope that I can start being more like you. No, I will start being more like you, because I'm tired of being such a spineless coward all the fucking time.
"But from now on, that's not me anymore. If I see any asshole picking on you, or teasing you, or even just looking at you the wrong way, they'll know not to mess with anyone Finn Hudson l-loves. Because I do. Love you I mean. I don't know, maybe it's weird for one dude to tell another dude they love them, but I do. You're my brother, man. You really are. And even with our… Past history, I know you feel the same. I know you think of me as your brother, even though you hate it when I say you're my little brother even though you're really older than me. I mean, you are though… You're just really skinny, even though you have gained some weight back from when you lost all of it. Whatever though, that doesn't matter. I mean it does, it's awesome you're getting healthy and all… Whatever, you know what I mean. You're my brother, and so I should start acting like it. I love you man, and I'm just really, really sorry for fucking everything. I figured it was about time I became a decent human being and said it."
Finn took a shaky breath, held it, made sure the tears that had gathered in his eyes had dissipated, and looked up at Kurt, scared at what he would find.
Kurt was crying. It was silent, and it wasn't nearly as bad as the time Karofsky assaulted him, but the tears were still streaming down his face, and his nose was the same bright red as his eyes.
"Shit, Kurt, I'm sorry! Damn it, I knew I shouldn't have said anything, I just-" He was cut off by his brother's body flinging onto his own, and his arms flung around his neck.
"No, Finn, thank you. Thank you so much." Kurt choked out. "You have no idea… I just though you didn't care you know? I didn't really think you even thought of me as your actual brother. I love you too though. You're- you're an awesome brother, I couldn't have asked for a better one. Thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you." And after that last thank you, Kurt just settled for squeezing his brother's neck tightly, letting him know that even though he couldn't speak from the tears, he truly appreciated him.
Finn started patting Kurt on the back, but then decided it was okay if he gave his brother a real hug. And so he did.