I know a lot of you out there
disregard GT, but for this fic I'm not. Even if Toriyama didn't do it,
it still came after Z, so it's canon to me. Like it, hate it, I don't care.
My fics fit in between pieces of canon or they don't work at all. So here
we go. Watch out for bad language and other stuff.
Believe Again
Part One
I sat on the verge of hysterics as planet Earth exploded on my TV screen. All week I'd been dreading this moment. Sick to my heart, to my soul. My fingers were typing words into the AIM window I'd connected to, but I don't even remember half of what was said. I kept telling my online friend what I felt. Screaming silently in cyberspace. Crying as I clutched my Piccolo figurine, mumbling his name over and over again. Angry at Gohan and them on TV for only missing him for a moment and then celebrating in the next scene as if he wasn't even important anymore. They didn't sit down and talk about him, they didn't look for the rare photo, I never even heard them say his NAME. How the hell can Gohan miss Piccolo when he never went to talk to him much once he got married? I just wanted to punch his glasses off and stomp on them.
Jen understood the pain I was in...and I was glad for that. She kept talking to me and talking to me and talking to me until my vision cleared enough for me to make sense again. Yes, Piccolo did die on his own terms, yes he had his dignity and yes he was still on his feet. But he still DIED!
Episode forty of Dragonball GT had just ended. Being so upset sent my cramps into overdrive as if something inside me exploded too. Or maybe I just felt Piccolo die.
Jen, God bless her, stayed with me while Ariel came on - the girl I RP with all the time. I brought the issue up with her too and she helped me laugh a bit. Jen asked me if I'd be okay before she left and I said yes. Then my comp screwed up while we said goodbye and I had to reboot.
The screen flashed and crackled like it always does. I watched it in a daze while the WINDOWS cloudy scene came up, then the blue screen where Scandisk runs, then the blank one that precedes my galaxy desktop wallpaper. I saw rocks instead. A reddish-gold place getting darker by the second. Then the desktop came up with Piccolo's little "boot camp is about to begin" sound byte.
I thought nothing of the image and went back to my roleplay with Ariel. Once I'm RPing I hate being interrupted. Hate having my thoughts intruded upon to the point of disrupting my flow. Anybody who knows me knows that. And I wanted to find out what was going to happen between our characters...so sue me if my priorities suck.
$
All clocks in the house said something resembling two in the morning when I shut the computer off. Again I saw those subliminal-like images of darkness. What the hell....who cares, I didn't want to think of anything other than Piccolo. I did all my bedtime rituals, loaded up on painkillers and headed into the kitchen for some pecan cookies.
My mom was still up. I asked her how she was doing. I don't know how many of you out there know this or not, but my mom is being treated for cancer. Her radiation burns itch and bother her. They got the cancer out of her body and are just doing radiation to make sure nothing got left behind. Earlier today she got weird bumps and the advice nurse said she should see a doctor, but it was too late to go tonight. Life sucks like that.
"How're you doin', mommy?" I asked while I bit down on the cookie.
Mom looked up from the crossword puzzle she was doing. "Okay, I guess. It hurts when I put pressure on it. I'm going to urgent care tomorrow morning to see what's going on."
"What did that nurse tell you?"
She shrugged one shoulder, "Might be an infection around the old incision site. Radiation messes up your immune system so you catch infections you'd never even think about. It could also be nothing."
"Yeah well, if you leave before I wake up, leave a note telling what time you and dad left okay? I don't want to sit here thinking you had to be rushed to an emergency room somewhere."
"Sure," Mom took her reading glasses off and stuffed them into their little green case.
Green....I looked away.
"They killed my favorite character off on my show tonight." I said sadly, picking at the half-eaten cookie in my hands.
Mom stretched in her chair. "Piccolo, right?"
"....yeah."
"Well can't they use those balls to wish him back again like last time?"
That made me smile, the way she said it was almost teasing, but showed interest too. "It was a different set. When they were used they dispersed over the whole universe and you have to get them back to the planet the wish was made on or it'll explode. Well, some ass used them again and the guys couldn't get them back in time. So Piccolo stayed to make sure they couldn't be used again. They were useless once he died...but it still sucks."
"Mm." Mom's understanding ended there. I couldn't let her see how truly upset I was. Piccolo might be "a cartoon character" to a lot of people......but how many of them got to meet and love him? How many know what makes him laugh, what makes him cry, how to touch him and how to please him? How many of you felt your heart break when planet Earth exploded on your screen?
I said good night and wandered off to change my pad and go to bed.
$
The clock said three-fifteen. I know, I looked three times. Every second felt like hours. I'd watched the episode four times in a row on tape just to make sure it really happened. I've fought to save the world from oblivion and a life of nightmares. I've seen horrors that still leave me trembling and afraid at night.
Nothing compared to seeing Piccolo die like that. Nothing. I couldn't even get to sleep so I could reach him in my dreams. It was three twenty now and I was still wide awake. As if I'd slept all night and been up for an hour.
I gave up on sleep, put in an old DBZ tape and turned on the computer. Again I saw that weird scene flash by, but it was dark as if night had fallen.
Wait!
My eyes went to my TV screen. It was the episode where Goku had to compete against Goz and Mez to get out of Hell. The sky was a pinkish, goldish, reddish color, just as bright as a cloudy sky at noon. I don't remember it ever changing. It was like Namek, always daytime from what I'd seen.
....oh shit.
I shut the computer down. Same pictures. I shut my TV off, launched myself out of the computer chair and dove for my top dresser drawer. Guided by touch more than sight I dug through my underwear until my fingers closed around a stainless steel box.
Before I could even lift the little box from the drawer, a soft ching noise sounded. Snap went my bedside lamp to send low light into my room.
Who the hell painted Legolas from Lord of the Rings purple and gave him silver hair? And how did he get so tall? And what the heck was he doing in my room?
"Kaibito?" I gawked at him. Dayum, in the Anime realm he's kinda plain to me, but here? Gorgeous! Especially those black-as-black-can-get eyes and pouty, almost effeminate lips. He appeared much younger than I thought he was...and I'd kill to have that kind of skin.
"How'd you know where to find me?" I finally came back to myself.
Kaibito nodded once. "I'm still a Kaioshin, I know pretty much everything that goes on between worlds. Including the battles you've been in."
A hot coal lodged in my stomach. I turned my back to him and crossed my arms. It never occurred to me that I was talking to a highly revered deity when I said, "If you're so great then why couldn't you save Piccolo? You can go anywhere, you could've gotten those stupid black star dragonballs back to Earth in no time flat."
"I - " He sighed deeply, his voice flat, "I sense people, not dragonballs." brief pause, "Piccolo doesn't want to be wished back because if he lives, so will the black star balls. I'm sorry. He made his choice."
I put a hand over my face and squeezed my eyes shut. A sob still got out despite my efforts to stop it. God, I was being such a baby, but I couldn't help it. I wasn't like the others on TV....I wasn't going to just watch someone I love die, shrug and go on with life. Especially not when he died to save the world!
Kaibito's large hand came to rest on my bare shoulder right next to the strap of my halter top. His skin was as soft and warm as a baby's against mine. "I'm really sorry...listen." He knelt to make our heights more equal and placed his other hand on my other shoulder. "Piccolo needs your help again. Void has come back and she's after all of Otherworld. I can feel her evil...she's gotten stronger. And if she destroys Otherworld, she'll destroy the living world as well, because there won't be any souls waiting to be born or reborn. The souls of those who die will have nowhere to go and evaporate. The universe, all of it, will gradually die."
The hot coal in my stomach doubled its size. "When will that stupid freak learn?"
He shook his head and stood up. "There's no way to destroy her utterly, I'm afraid. Every time the balance between our dimensions tips in favor of evil, she gains enough power to take form. I can look into your world as easily as Chikyuu, and from the looks of all the wars going on in the country you call Iraq, I can see where she's getting her energy."
A growl escaped my throat. "Why don't you just ask Goku to save the universe? Isn't he the big hero who takes over the show?" I know, I know, I was being a brat....but at the moment I hated everybody. Tired of being run to like I knew all the answers every time. I didn't. I didn't beat Void - YOU did. I just took stupid chances when all I had left was to gamble with life and death. I'm tired of the game. Why can't Piccolo and I just live happily ever after with the ability to talk about anything, a great sex life, a couple of gorgeous kids and enough money to keep us comfortable until we're too old to wipe our own butts?
"Because," Kaibito's hands moved off my shoulders, "he has his own destiny to play out."
I deflated and looked at the little silver box in my palm. "I kept everything I need in a capsule just in case...so I don't need to pack anything." I took the small object out. "What about the Necklace? Will I need it?"
"It would be dangerous. Having one of those in the living world and the other in Otherworld would cause a dimensional overload that could strengthen Void even more. Either I fuse it with you so your power keeps it under control or...you'll have to leave it."
"Which is safer?"
"Fusing it."
I took a deep breath. My heart hammered in my ears. I didn't know if this would hurt or not. "Then fuse it. I don't want to take chances."
"Very well then." Kaibito lifted the little orange bauble from the box. He twisted it free from the ornamental gold dragon's paw and held it in his palm. "Once I do this you'll be able to pass between dimensions and change forms at will. Just approach a mirror with at least three feet of clearance and step in. All you need to do is will it to the surface to open the portals."
"Wait, change my form?"
"Between human and your other one."
"But I'm only a Saiyajin in the Anime world because my body adjusted itself to fit the reality. Same reason Piccolo became slightly human when he came here. I can't change in this world, people would freak!"
Kaibito chuckled, "True, but you'll be stronger. It'll also make passing through dimensions less stressful on your body."
"Great, how will I know what to do?"
"Trust yourself." He met my eyes. "This will feel hot, but it won't hurt."
The little bauble in Kaibito's hand glowed like brilliant fire. All fourteen stars flashed in sequence from outermost to innermost. Then it rose off his palm and floated towards my chest. I felt intense heat and pressure as it came in contact with the skin just below my collarbones. Something like getting a suppository inserted into my breastbone - my chest literally sucked this golfball sized thing in! It sank into bone and...eeew, it sloshed. I saw the outline of my beating heart and ribs just before the light faded. The sensations vanished. I felt no different than I had before it went in, save for a slight heartburn sensation. Heh. I looked down and found no marks, no bumps, no sign of anything.
"That...was....gross..." I rubbed the spot where the miniature dragonball went in, "Idiot time...what exactly do I do?"
Kaibito was ready for my questions. His lips drew up in a calm smile, black eyes twinkling. "Face the mirror - good. Now just call it out. It'll listen."
I must've stared at the mirror for the longest time. It's not easy to concentrate with a mind like mine, I kept thinking about other things. But finally I started to feel heat in the same place the dragonball entered me. In the mirror I watched little points of light rise up under my skin and coagulate into an orange orb. There was this weird stretchy sensation as it pushed itself out. I felt no pain...it was more of a pulling sensation. Take the skin under your chin between two fingers and pull gently forward, it's something like that.
My reflection instantly became a colored mass of ripples. I lost my focus when I glimpsed the Lookout kitchen. Too many memories. The bauble sucked itself back in and the mirror instantly went flat. One thing Kaibito forgot to mention was it drew on my energy to bring that thing out. I couldn't hold a portal open for long.
Kaibito grabbed my arm. His eyebrows drew together, wrinkling his smooth forehead. "You should wait to try and change form at will. Your body needs to adjust. Don't push yourself, I need to take you to Otherworld and you can't reach that through normal means. Instant Transmission is the only way."
Of course! I grabbed the front of Kaibito's red jerkin, discovering it was made of something similar to stretchy velvet "Can you take me to Piccolo?!"
He touched his forehead with two fingers and concentrated. Eyes looking around towards invisible powers, singling them out until he seemed to find what he sought. "He's still in line to be judged." He smiled, "You'll like this....he still has his body."
I would've cheered if everybody else wasn't asleep. Even if Piccolo turned into a puffy little cloud, I'd still love him...
"Hold on, here we go."
Ching!
Fastest change of scenery I've ever witnessed. I just blinked and there I was in the colorful check-in station, surrounded by wispy clouds arranged in long lines. The line stretched out around a curving path that vanished around a corner. Up ahead was the most immense desk I'd ever seen. Big as a house! And sitting behind it was an equally massive being with a beard. The great Enma Daiou. Somehow he reminded me of my dad because he looked so stressed out.
I wagged my tail - yes I'd changed the instant we appeared - and looked around. "I thought you were taking me right to Piccolo, Kaibito." Boy am I a whiny thing or what?
"Patience, you'll see him once he's - "
"Ahh, Piccolo. Again. Plan on staying this time?" Enma Daiou's booming voice shot clear across the waiting area, drowning out Piccolo's response. He pulled out a massive, and I mean a MASSIVE, ten-foot-tall manila folder. Piccolo's entire history lay between two flimsy pieces of cardboard. It shook the desk when Enma dropped it. "Ah, you died saving the Earth this time. Heh, looks like that boy changed you for keeps. Heaven it is." A thump as he stamped the file with a giant rubber stamp.
Piccolo turned away with a snap of his majestic white cape. He looked no different than the last time I saw him except that a little gold halo floated above his head. One of the helper people off to the side called him over and stamped the back of his hand...hehe, just like at Disneyland.
My throat welled up. He was okay... "Piccolo!"
Piccolo stopped in mid-step. I saw his head whip around to peer at me. One eye grew twice as big as the other and his mouth formed a perfect "O". The look of utter befuddlement on his face almost cracked me up. I shoved Kaibito out of my way, burst through a crowd of "cloud-people"(they squawked angrily at me) and dove at Piccolo so fast he had to catch me like a football. He stumbled back a few steps and fell square on his butt with me sprawled out in his lap.
I turned over and brushed my hair out of my face, smiling, "Hi."
The confusion melted to blatant amusement - that little twitch of a smile and slight tilt to his eyes. "Hey, kid....how'd you get here?"
"Ahem..." Kaibito walked over, dusting himself off. His hair was all messed up and his clothes were dirty. "She had a little help. And by the way, Cyndi, you're welcome."
.....I felt so dumb. I just knocked over this universe's highest deity! "Sorry..." My face burned.
Kaibito shot me a withering glance and moved his gaze up to Piccolo's eyes. "Are you aware of what's going on down in Hell?"
Piccolo's expression became extremely serious. "I sensed a disturbance the second I arrived here. It took this one," he jostled my shoulder almost affectionately, "long enough to pick up the message. I was going to send Dende to get her, but it looks like you beat me to the punch."
The stupid cramps came back. They made me feel a bit queasy. I rested my ear against Piccolo's chest and let the deep bass vibration of his voice rumble through my skull. He had no heartbeat and only took a breath to speak. It was odd, disconcerting....I could always listen to his heartbeat and feel like everything would be okay. Now that sound was absent. His dusty desert scent swirled around me. My eyes raised to his face, it was still just as gorgeous as I remember. The only thing in Anime realm that you don't see on TV is their mouths match exactly what they say instead of simply moving open and shut.
I lowered my eyes to the stamp on Piccolo's hand. Inside a red circle was the "letter" ten, the Japanese symbol for Heaven.
"...that's really rough." Piccolo was saying. I'd completely tuned out their conversation until just then. He looked down at me. "Cyndi..." he lifted me by the armpits and sat me down beside him. "You can't fight this battle as you are. Your body can't take it the kind of energy you need."
"What?" I looked from Piccolo to Kaibito. "What do I have to do?"
"Cyndi," Piccolo's expression turned grave. "you have to die."