Going Under

Rating: PG-13 for mild profanity

Summary: Ginny finally gets all that she wants, but is Harry Potter really who she thinks he is?

Author Notes: So this is a rewrite, because I wrote the other one a long time ago and i reread it a few days ago and I found that it was one of the worst things i have ever written. So I rewrote it. The first paragraph/section type thing is meant to be like in the future type thing and the rest is in the past kinda leading up to it and from there on. Get it? If you don't, don't worry cause I don't either. Just read it please, and review. I can't believe I just begged for reviews. I am ashamed -hides face-.

Now I will tell you what I've done for you
Fifty thousand tears I've cried
Screaming, deceiving, and bleeding for you
And you still won't hear me

A shadow stumbles down the corridor, stopping every so often, not seeming to know where it is, or where it is going. Slowly, as the shadow approaches the warmth of a candle hanging from the wall, a body begins to take form. The girl's pale face is void of emotion she looks like one would expect one of the fallen angels to look; only this angel has long auburn hair. Suddenly she crumples against the wall and tears start to stream down her face but she doesn't seem to notice them because she is deep in thought. Remembering.
Ginny looked up from her books to the sound of laughter, she saw her brother, Harry, and Hermione all shaking as they tried to silence their mirth but to no avail. Harry suddenly burst out laughing and Ron and Hermione soon followed suit. Within a minute, Madame Pince swooped down on them scolding them for disrupting the peace in the library. Hermione fed her some bullshit story and because Madame Pince had always had a soft spot for the girl, she let them off with only a warning. Hermione looked over and caught Ginny staring at them. Ginny saw her eyes turn wicked as she smirked at the younger girl and then returned to her friends.

Hermione was the luckiest girl in the school, and she knew it. To be friends with Ron Weasley and Harry Potter! They were the two most handsome guys in the school. Hermione was by no means beautiful, no, she still had the same bushy hair that she had started school with, was quite small, and even though the incident between Harry and Draco had shrunk her front teeth to normal size, her parents had still insisted on braces.

Ginny turned back to her books. The only way she could ever gain the smallest bit of attention in her family was to get good grades, otherwise her parents would hardly notice her in the midst of them worrying about what Harry, Ron and Hermione were going to get themselves into that year. There was also the fact that she had been placed in Slytherin, instead of Gryffindor like the rest of her family. Therefore she was even more of an outcast, from her family because of her house and from her house because of her family. In time, the Slytherin house had accept her but she would never have any true friends. A shadow fell over her, and she looked up only to see Harry standing over her. "Hey Ginny, what's up?" Ginny wondered why he was even bothering to talk to her other than out of necessity. "Nothing much, just doing homework." She replied. "Yeah, I remember 5th year, it was horrible." He said with his trademark shy smile on his face. "Listen, I was wondering, do you wanna go to Hogsmeade with me next weekend?" He asked. Ginny couldn't believe her ears. She wanted to shout YES at the top of her lungs, but she contained herself. "Yeah, that would be cool." She said with all the control she could muster. "Great! I'll meet you by the front doors at 10, okay?" "Kay, see you then." Ginny said, and Harry walked back to the table where Hermione was still sitting, her brother had disappeared. Ginny heard her ask Harry, "Harry, why on earth did you just ask a Slytherin out? They are supposed to be your mortal enemies... remember?" Harry just laughed at her and shook his head.

She spent the next week figuring out what she was going to wear, and fretting over her date with Harry Potter while the rest of her house looked on with disgust. When the day finally came, Ginny got up extra early just to make sure that she looked perfect, then she went downstairs at 9:45 and waited for Harry. He never showed up.
Don't want your hand this time I'll save myself
Maybe I'll wake up for once
Not tormented daily defeated by you
Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom
I'm dying again

Of course Harry had come up with a perfectly good excuse, he was off saving the world again, from the evil forces of, well, evil. Ginny had had a hard time believing him, but he was so sweet, so she agreed to another date. There wasn't much to do around Hogwarts for a date other than Hogsmeade weekends, but there wasn't another one for a month and a half. When Ginny pointed out this fact, Harry laughed and told her not to worry about it, only to meet her at the front doors before supper in four days. Ginny, once again spent every single spare moment between then and her date preparing. Once again all the Slytherins rolled their eyes in disgust and looked the other way. All except one.

"Virginia. Why on earth would you want to go out with Potter?" Draco Malfoy drawled one night in the common room from his usual seat in front of the fire. The entire common room went silent, everyone wanting to see little Ginny Weasley make a fool of herself again and express her undying love for the boy who lived. She wouldn't give them the satisfaction, or at least she would attempt not to.

"Why Draco, I think that would be quite obvious." She said calmly. He raised an eyebrow in response.

"Still, please do me the honor of explaining, for it is often the most obvious things we miss." He said, eyes daring her to back down.

"Surely Draco, it's very simple. He's just more handsome than you." Draco was out of his seat and had a painful grip on her wrist before she could even blink.

"Don't you ever compare me to Potter again Weasley. I am more than he could ever hope to be in his life. Do you understand? If you do you will be extremely sorry." He threw her wrist down in disgust and turned back to his chair. The common room returned to its normal activity seeing that the commotion was over. Ginny just stood there, willing the tears in her eyes to go down. Slowly she walked back to her dormitory where she collapsed on her bed and finally started to cry.

Later on when she met up with Harry for their date, he kissed away her tears and told her to pay no attention to Malfoy, that everything would be ok. Ginny felt her heart melt and from that point on, she was his forever and for always.

I'm going under
Drowning in you
I'm falling forever
I've got to break through
I'm going under

By the next day, the news had already spread. Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley going out? A Slytherin and a Gryffindor?! How is this possible? Of course with the news came the vicious gossip. Lies like, "I heard that he got her pregnant and now they have to get married because her mother won't let her get an abortion" and, "She must put out a whole lot in order to get Harry, but who could blame her? He is Harry Potter after all and he's so hot, I would if I got the chance to be with him." One girl told her friends in the hallways. They shrieked as though the mere thought of actually having sex (gasp) was terrifying while all the time they were silently agreeing in their minds. It was now official, Ginny Weasley was the luckiest, most envied, and most hated girl in the school.

Ginny walked by all the packs of whispering girls in the halls on her way back from breakfast, ignorant of all the rumors going around about her. In her opinion, she was in love and nothing could touch her, and if it could, Harry would ride in at the crucial moment on his white horse, whisk her away and be her Prince Charming.

How wrong she was.

Ginny was in the Gryffindor common room, spending some 'quality time' with Harry. In reality they were making out on one of the more inconspicuous chairs in the corner.

"Hold on a minute Gin," Harry said and sat up. Ginny slid off him and frowned, upset that he had discontinued his actions. "I just remembered something, I'll be right back." With that he took off and Ginny was left sitting there, completely alone in enemy territory. She looked around, trying to make herself as inconspicuous as possible. The Gryffindor common room was much nicer than her own house's, much more homely, more welcoming.

All of a sudden Hermione Granger appeared before her. "Ginny." She said curtly.

"Granger." Ginny answered back.

"So how is it going with Harry? Have you two fallen in love?" Hermione laughed to herself at this last statement, like she knew something Ginny didn't know.

"I don't see how it's any of your business Granger, now please go back to snogging my brother or whatever it is you do in your spare time. Oh right, I forgot you study."

"I'd be careful if I were you Ginny. Don't forget, I am Harry's best friend, he turns to me for everything, every last piece of advice." She turned around and headed back to the couch in front of the fire, where she began to once again pretend to study while sneaking little peaks at Ron who was sitting next to her swearing at his book. It seemed that it was the books fault that he did not understand one word of the chapter he was to have a test on the next morning. Ginny laughed, no matter how annoying her brother could be she still loved him. Harry soon returned and they resumed their previous activities.

Meet me by the front doors tonight at 6.
 Love, Harry

Ginny sighed, she couldn't wait to see Harry again, it had been a whole 2 days! She started walking towards the dungeons, reading the note over and over again. Love, Harry what did that mean? She was pondering the many ways he could mean that love when she tripped over something and landed face first on the ground. She heard someone laughing, and immense hatred filled up inside her. Someone really needed to curse that bitch Granger. Of course people had tried, but she had always blocked their curses and sent them straight back at them. She wasn't the smartest witch in the school for nothing.

Ginny stood up and opened her mouth to insult Hermione but someone else spoke for her.

"I wouldn't try that again Granger." Someone drawled behind Ginny. She turned around to see Malfoy leaning against the wall, looking almost bored.

"Sure Malfoy, I'm so afraid of you, I'll do whatever you say." She said, sarcasm so visible that Ginny thought she could reach out and take some. Sarcasm had never been her fine point, no one could tell whether she was serious or not.

"You should be." Draco said, not skipping a beat.

"What are you going to do? Follow Ginny around 24/7? I'm not to sure Harry would be too happy with that."

"Oh you think I care about Potter? You know, for the number one student in our year, you sure are dull and I've grown quite bored. Come Virginia, I don't think that I can stand much more time in such a filthy company." Draco turned around and started to walk the other way. Hermione on the other hand turned red with rage, a trait no doubt that she had picked up from Ginny's brother, and raised her wand. Just before she could finish muttering a curse a Draco's back, her arms and legs snapped together and it was her turn to fall on her face. Draco turned around and looked from Hermione to Ginny, whose wand was still raised. "I suppose thanks are in order." He said

"Don't mention it. I've been dying to do that to her since forever." Draco nodded and they walked back to their common room together in silence. Once there, Ginny dropped her bag off in her room and then walked back out to the front doors. She didn't encounter Hermione on the way so she supposed that someone had found her and released her of the curse. Once again Ginny waited at the front doors, once again Harry didn't show. It hurt more and more each time.

Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies
So I don't know what're real and what's not
Always confusing the thoughts in my head
So I can't trust myself anymore
I'm dying again

It was a few days after Harry had stood her up. Of course he had come to her the next day and apologized but somehow it didn't seem as satisfactory. He began missing more and more of their dates. Hermione seemed to be pleased with herself when she saw the hurt in the younger girl's eyes. Ginny knew that Hermione had something to do with Harry's absences.

She cornered her one night on her way back from waiting for Harry not to show up. "What the hell do you think you're doing Granger?" Hermione tried to look innocent but failed miserably and broke out into a wide evil grin, almost resembling Umbridge.

"What are you talking about Ginny? I was walking back to my common room but now I'm being cornered and questioned by you."

"You know what I mean Granger. What are you telling Harry, I know you have something to do with his not seeing me lately."

"Why Ginny, how could you even suspect me of such a hateful crime?"

"Because it's what you do Granger." Ginny let her go and walked back to her common room, disgusted. How could Harry stand to be friends with her? She was such a detestable creature. She decided that she would just have to ask him herself.

No sooner had she thought that, she found herself face to face with none other than Harry. "Hey." He said softly, folding her into an embrace. Ginny leaned her head against his chest and almost forgot what she was so angry at him for. She looked up at his face.

"I missed you. Have you been eating strawberries lately? Your lips look unnaturally red." She stood on her tiptoes and licked them, "Tasty." She said and kissed him again, and everything wrong in her life vanished. "Where have you been the past week?" Ginny asked, once their snogging session was over.

"Oh, I've just been cramming in a bit of extra study before this big potions exam with Hermione." Harry said, not looking her in the eyes. The disgust on her face must have been evident because he continued, "It's really nothing. I just don't want to fail out of NEWT potions after it took forever to get in."

Ginny believed him. She even decided one night that she would bring him a late night snack to help him study. Walking into the library with her bag stuffed full with treats, Ginny searched the entire room for them but she couldn't find Harry or Hermione. She was lost in her own fantasy as she checked the back of the library, not really expecting to find them there, people usually only went back here to (cough) perform acts of profanity. Ginny imagined that when she found Harry, he would find that he was madly and hopelessly in love with her, then they would make passionate love again, and then he would propose to her even though they were still in school. He would wait until she had graduated because he loved her so much.

She turned the corner and saw the two people that she was looking for, fulfilling her fantasy. Hermione was straddling Harry and he had his hand up her shirt. Ginny gasped and dropped her bag. This couldn't be happening. To make things worse, they had heard her and Hermione turned around a triumphant smirk on her face. She didn't even bother to fix herself.

"Can we help you Ginny? If not, please go away, as you can see we are in the middle of something here." Ginny looked from Hermione to Harry and she could see that he had been with Hermione the whole time, that he had been lying to her the entire time and just as she had felt her heart melt two months ago, she felt her heart shatter now.

I'm going under
Drowning in you
I'm falling forever
I've got to break through

"Aww. Poor Ginny. Are you going to cry?" Hermione sneered, "It's not going to do you any good. I told you to watch yourself, but did you listen? No, and look where it got you." At her words, all emotion ceased to be in Ginny. She stopped crying, confusing Hermione; instead she slowly raised her wand and once again pointed it at Hermione. The other girl's eyes widened and scrambled for her own wand, she was too late.

"Crucio." Ginny said calmly and before Hermione had the chance to scream she placed a silencing charm around them so no one would hear the other girls tortured screams. Harry yelled at her to stop the curse, but Ginny took some sort of sick pleasure at seeing Hermione writing on the ground in pain. After all, she deserved it, for all that she had done to her. Harry tried to lunge at Ginny but before he got to her she turned her wand on him and shouted "Stupefy!" and he fell to the ground, crashing into the desk. Hermione's shrieks soon stopped and Ginny ended the curse, bending down only to make sure that the two were still alive before walking calmly out of the library.

So go on and scream
Scream at me I'm so far away
I won't be broken again
I've got to scream
I can't keep going under

What had just happened finally hit her when she exited the library, and the immense pain in her chest returned. She started to run, tears blinding her. She didn't know where she was going; she just let her feet guide her. She ran and ran until her lungs called out for oxygen and she collapsed against a wall. Finally she looked around. She was in the astronomy tower. 'How ironic is this?' she said to herself, she and Harry had come here only a few nights before for a prolonged snog session.

It seemed fate was calling to her, because she looked up and found that she was sitting underneath one of the windows. 'Why not?' the voice inside her head said. 'No one would care, really. You think you really matter? Harry and Hermione have just proven that you don't. Do it. Jump. It will be relatively painless.' Ginny jumped up onto the window ledge, swaying dangerously. She steadied herself by grabbing onto the side of the stone window frame.

"WHATS IT WORTH?! WHATS IT WORTH, THIS LIFE, IF ALL YOU COME TO KNOW IS SUFFERING AND HUMILIATION?!" she screamed into the steadily darkening night, causing flocks of owls to come fluttering out of the trees in the Forbidden Forest. "TELL ME!! AND I MAY LIVE TO SEE THE SUN RISE IN THE MORNING!" no answer came and the feeling of hopelessness returned. Ginny had no clue how long she stood there, contemplating her life, the sky had turned to black and she could see the stars now. 'They really are beautiful' she thought. There was noise behind her and she turned around to see who had come up here. There was no one, only shadow. She willed herself to get down from the ledge, willed herself to be the strong one, to show Harry that he wasn't one that she would waste away over. But she couldn't. She had already wasted away over him and now she had no other choice. Slowly she let go of the ledge and moved towards the middle of the window spreading out her arms. She whispered a prayer and forced her eyes open as she began to lean forward, tears falling freely from her eyes again.

fin