I own nothing. I do not own the plot, it based off of the movie and book by the same name. I also do not own the characters used for this story, they belong to their original creators and Disney. I have made my own little changes to the characters personalities as well as little things in the plot to flow with the characters better.
Chapter 1: First crushes
A girl will never forget the first boy she likes….
It was a sunny summer afternoon where the children were playing in the local park. The only source of shade coming from the trees hanging over certain parts of the area. The shadiest places were the jungle gym for the children and a couple benches for their parents. There were many children running around the play structure varying from ages 2 – 10. Some were trying to touch the sky using the swings; others were sliding down the various slides trying to fly like birds. In the sandbox next to the slide, an adorable five year old girl with long wavy black hair parted into two pigtails plays among a group of children.
I have a theory about how this all started….
A six year old boy approaches the sandbox with three of his friends following closely behind. He watches the little girl with black pigtails for a moment as she gently shapes her sandcastle. And then – out of nowhere – the little boy pushes the little girl down to the ground.
"Why did you do that?" the little girl with black pigtails asked from the ground.
"Because you smell like dog poo." The little boy said
The little boys friends and some of the other children snicker at this brilliant one-liner. The little girl with black pigtails' face turned red at his remark.
"You're so stupid just like dog poo! You're made of poo!" the little boy continued.
And then, just to add insult to injury, he jumps on the sandcastle, smashing it to ruins. The other children laughed at the little boy's antics. The little girl with pigtails' lip began to tremble as she tried not to let what the boy said get to her. After a minute, the little girl finally started to cry. She got up and pushed her way past the children around her to reach her mother whom sat on a park bench, not far from her, reading a book. The mother frowned when she heard her daughter cry, she looked up just as the little girl opened her arms for a hug. The mother put her book down quickly then opened her arms in time to hug her daughter as she wrapped her small arms around her mother's waist. The mother hummed as she picked up her daughter to place her in her own lap as she stroked the top of her daughters black hair.
The mother waited patiently for her daughter to calm down. She rocked them back and forth on the bench. The little girl tried thinking about other things to make herself stop crying, but to no avail. The little girl focused on her breathing instead of her thoughts, she inhaled the familiar smell of the ocean coming from her mother. The little girl could smell it the most in her mother's long red hair, as if she lived there for years; her hair soaking in everything the little girl loved and found comforting. After a few minutes the mother pulled away from her daughter with a gentle smile on her face.
"Sweetheart, what happened?" she asked as she wiped stray tears from her daughters' cheek. After some time the little girl managed to tell her mother about the incident with the little boy.
"Made … of … dog … poo." She said between sobs.
"Honey, do you know why that little boy did those things? And said those things?"
The little girl shook her head no as she stared at her mother with fascination and a little anxiety as she waited for this secret to be revealed.
"Because he likes you." The mother said as she taps her daughter on the nose and smiled at her.
Uh – excuse me – but what the fuck? Where did that rumor start? Because mom's have been spreading it for years.
"That little boy is doing those terrible things because he has a crush on you." The mother continues as she took out her daughters pigtails and combed her hair with her fingers while humming their song.
As her mother finished combing through her hair and putting her hair back in their pigtails, the little girl pondered her mother's words. When her mother was through she kissed the top of her daughters head and helped her daughter down. The little girl walked back to the playground lost in thought. She felt as if a veil had been lifted from her eyes and she could see clearly. For the first time in her short life, she felt like she was beginning to understand the ways of the world.
Do you understand what this means? We are all encouraged to believe that if a guy acts like a total ass wipe – that means he likes you. Sure, that's a lesson that might serve us as five year olds, but many of us believe this advice well into adulthood.
INTO DORM ROOM
There was a cute college girl in a purple mini dress with gold accessories – gold hoop earrings, a gold arm cuff was on her right arm and a bracelet on her left wrist. She also had gold heals that were long forgotten by the front door. Her smoky eye makeup was purple to match her dress while her lips were just decorated by clear lip gloss. Her face was red and her eyes puffy as her tears and mascara mixed together down her cheeks as she continued to cry in front of her answering machine, as her roommate looked on.
Then, as we get older, we carry on this tradition of misreading the signals men send by encouraging our friends to do the same…
The college girl opened her eyes to look at her answering machine. The machine evilly flashes 0 in the new messages window.
"That Phi Delta so obviously liked you. I'm sure he just lost your number." Her roommate tells her as she goes to comfort her friend again.
INTO HIGH RISE OFFICE - DAY
In an office hallway made of glass stood a beautiful – and distracted – executive woman. She had on a blue high-waist skirt that ended an inch above her knees with a plain white blouse tucked into it and a black belt that matched her black pumps. Her long brown hair was pulled into a neat high ponytail and she had on very little makeup. She sighed distracted as she watched her sexy male colleague pace around his office while talking on his Bluetooth headpiece. The executive woman soaked in his appearance for the day. His long dirty blond hair was pulled into a low ponytail; his beautiful blue eyes were focused as his strong jaw worked to make the person on the other line agree with him and take his proposition. She gazed at his muscles through his white dress shirt – his suit coat long forgotten on his chair. He didn't even give her a second glance.
The executive woman's secretary watched her as she shook her head at her boss. She quickly brushed her blond bangs out of her eyes before standing up and fixing her green dress and white blazer. Then she made her way - as quietly as she could in her gold coloured heals – over to her boss.
"He's not asking you out because he's intimidated by your professional success and emotional maturity." The secretary whispers as she joins her boss in watching their sexy colleague. The executive woman nods her head slowly in agreement but stops abruptly and turned to face her secretary.
"Aren't you engaged? Stop staring at him." The executive woman said as she crossed her arms over her chest and stared accusingly at the secretary. The secretary waved her hand in her bosses face in hopes of distracting her enough into silence.
"Yes, I am. What's your point? It's not like I'm undressing and fooling around with him. I'm just enjoying the view…" the secretary trailed off as she leaned her head to the right, following her colleagues fit ass as he bent over to pick something up. Her boss sighed as she mimicked her secretary without noticing.
INTO BAR – NIGHT
Over at the bar of a crowded and dark pub sat a group of young women in their twenties sipping cocktails. In the corner sat one of the young women with short black hair and very fair skin. Her red lips matched her mini dress that she wore with her blue jean vest and black booties. Her mascara was smeared and her eyes were puffy from crying.
"Here's the problem, he likes you too much. You're too pretty and awesome. He can't handle it." Said the friend of the young woman crying. The crying woman looked at her blond friend in a blue strapless dress with a thick strip of yellow wrapping around her torso diagonally. The blond friend offered her crying friend one of the shot glasses she was holding. The crying woman with short black hair stared at the shot glass for a second before grabbing it from her friend and quickly threw it back before slamming the glass on the counter. The blond friend quickly offered her friend the second shot glass, which she took with a grin on her face. As the young woman with short black hair finished her second shot, her blond friend leaned over the counter to speak to the bartender that had just came to their end of the bar.
"Could I have another round, actually make it two." She ordered as she watched her friend take out her phone again and begin to pout.
INTO MCDONALD'S – DAY
Two teenaged female cashiers worked side by side as they each took their respected customers orders.
"Trust me. It's because he's just getting out of a serious relationship." The one cashier with long blond hair pulled into a ponytail and tucked under her black work hat, said as she finished with her customer. Her smiling cat tattoo peaked out as she accepted the change from her customer.
INTO GYM – DAY
Two middle aged women work out on elliptical machines. One of the women was tall and thin with black hair pulled into a tight bun. She wore black yoga pants with a dark purple tank top. The other woman was shorter than her friend by at least a foot, and was curvy. Her short black hair was starting to grey and was pulled into a short ponytail. She wore black shorts and a matching t-shirt.
"Trust me. It's because he's never had a serious relationship. That poor unfortunate soul will be crushed if things don't go well. You're magnificent and Stefan knows it." Said the short friend confidently.
INTO MASSAGE ROOM – DAY
A Japanese woman was elbowing the back of her usual weekly client as she listened to her boy problems. It was almost better than her soap operas she watches after her day is over.
"Phil's inability to commit clearly stems from his failure to properly imprint on his mother during breast feeding." The masseuse said confidently as she worked out the knot in her clients shoulder blades from her built up tension.
INTO SMALL VILLAGE HUT – DAY
A pretty young woman with tribal tattoos along her arms and bangles on her wrists weaves banana leaves together while she sits on the ground with her friend.
"I'm sure he forgot your hut number. Or didn't get enough approval from his father. Or was eaten by a giraffe." This last part seemed to cheer up the pretty woman with tattoos.
Why do we say this stuff to each other? Why do we tell each other these lies? Is it possible that it's because we're too scared, and it's too hard, to say the one obvious truth that's staring everyone in the face?
He's just not that into you….
A.N: Hey everyone I hope you enjoyed this short chapter! This is the first thing I'm posting to the site and cannot wait to continue with this story. I love the movie and always wanted to see how some of my favourite Disney characters worked in this world. Can you guess which Disney characters I used so far in this chapter? Send me a message and I'll let you know who was right in the next chapter. If I got even one response back, I would be honored. Cheers until next time!