Hi everyone! Just so you know I'm going to start a line of short stories with a base on my life but with my own twists and all. Like "Im Going To Die"

This one is based on my relationship with my dad and my friend's ex-boyfriend who is also my friend and this is a "what if" story.

Remember to Review!!

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This was not the life I chose. I never asked for it, it just unfolded and sucked me in. I couldn't escape it and it was always there. I was born into this life with no broken heart and no hurt soul. I was pure and clean. My mind wasn't tainted with the thoughts I have now. My eyes weren't as sore as they are now. Nothing now is like it was before.

Before the monster came.

I had always thought I would live in that house, the one where I had grew up all my life. There is was more freedom, I more dependent. I loved to be around people, just to talk to them and be a part of them and their lives. I loved to play with them, be apart of their games and fun. All that changed.

I met the Monster when I was about nine years old. I didn't understand much about why it happened, just that it did happen. I know it happened because I was there. I saw it with my own eyes and heard it with my two ears and spoke one simple word.

It's eyes bore into my own and I felt my skin boil and steam. In them I saw the fury it felt as it held the wrestling body of my brother. I didn't know why it was there, but I didn't stay to find out as my grandpa pushed and pulled me out of the house with the salty tears of fear ran down my face.

I had never seen anything like it before. I have always feared to see it after that and tried not to anger its Puppet as it plays from its strings. I watched this Puppet and challenged it, even now, but I watch to see how far I can get without the Monster coming out. I was scared of it but I felt the urge to prove myself.

I needed to be strong.

Now, as I sit on the steps to my home. I think about how much my life is shit and how I want to be the free little girl in the past. I wanted a release from this fear and to feel a rush of nothingness. I want to be that little girl.

I was waiting, but I didn't know what I was waiting for. I sat there watching the autumn leaves sit and drown in the gutter collecting dirt. It was a short life from them, they just lived for a few months until they just fall and get raked by community workers.

From those days to these days only one thing has come to mind and I always turn the idea away. I could never commit myself to do it. To feel the pain it brings with it, from its cool beauty. Itís beauty is just the cover-up of it and it causes the hurt of so many across the world.

I just cant handle it now.

I cant even handle my own infatuations. I'm an easy catch if you even try to get me. I fall easy for guys and I always get hurt by them or I just realize that I just cant like them. There's always something there to block me from what I want and I can never get around it. So I sit and wait and wait and wait. Patient forever.

Now, I don't know my feelings at all this time. I see him and I see so much. I talk to him like Ive known him forever. I hear him like he has something to say all the time. Do I want him? I wouldn't be able to have him. He promised himself to someone else and that someone is my best friend. I'm not suppose to feel like I can have him or that he should like me and not her. Even if she's my best friend, she treated him like nothing and they always argued.

Shell never know it.

I never had the luck with guys like she has. Guys are always falling for her, she's just so much of a flirt. I'm not like her but we talk all the time. I'm not much of a flirt, I just blush and smile. I always feel nervous around guys and conversation is hard if they don't try to pursue a topic. I'm not like her. I'm not like anyone I know.

I'm scared all the time and I cant do nothing about it. I'm scared to do bold things. I'm scared to confront someone and lose. I'm scared for my own life. There is very little I'm scared of, but those things are big major things to be scared of.

The night was warm, and the moon looked like half a pie. I have always wanted to touch the moon, but I never wanted to be an astronaut. The moon was always a welcomed sight as I thought of myself flying into the sky and bringing some part of it back with me. A childhood adventure.

I looked down the street and watched people do nightly things like everyone else, just trying to be part of the population like everyone else. They did things just to be like everyone else, to be apart of a group. They're all clones, artificial dummies of themselves, drones of the rich and famous.

I hugged my knee to my chest and watched my cloud of breath. I didnt want to go inside. Inside was my family and my family always had something to say to me. Something about my weight, about my attitude, something a little more personal.

Something a little more personal.

They don't know me like they use to. They see me as play doe. Something they can twist, shape, smooth to their perfection and no one else's. They believe in things that I just don't get. They say I'm fat when I'm not fat. They say my skin is bad when other people are worst. They say I don't have respect for others when they don't give me respect.

My heart is broken, I know that. Ive had trials that was a challenge to me and my sibling. My mother and father divorce. My father practically left us. My mother betrayed our trust. My father talks shit about having to do things he never had to do before.

I didn't know how I lasted this long but I guess fate wants me to stay a bit longer. Like people in time say, one cant leave with unfinished business. Thats mostly why I'm here I'm guessing, but then I have been wrong. It was in my blood to test this and try to prove things wrong or right, but time is just making me slow these days.

I have business to do, but no one knows.

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I stare, I'm extremely good at it, like a talent. If there was any rewards for most undisputed stare Id win, but its not the time to brag about it.

My complaint in like is that my life in general sucks. Family is a tightly stuff pack of issues and fights, law breaking and such. My school life, including all the guys, is just shit. I haven't had real love that I wanted for a long time. I had left that one love that wasn't really a love at all, just sexual tension.

When its comes to sex, I never had any. I never go that far without the fear of getting pregnant or catching some disease or worst, my family finds out. I'm no sex addict, but I like to have fun. Fun is what I need to forget my life. I want that slip up. I haven't felt that slip in a long time.

School was a bore for me, but I enjoyed it, the distraction was nice. Then, there were the times I had to be stuck with my father. I loved him, but he never understood my feelings or who I am. He's proud of me for lies I have built around myself. I'm not proud that I'm his daughter.

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I was walking to my locker when I ran into him. Yes, him. He's cute and makes me feel antsy. Yet, I feel like I have to be strong and outgoing around him. I act my other half around him. With that pale skin and dark rings around his eyes, his mysteriousness always caught me. It was his stare that I loved first.

"Whoa, where you going?" His arm rested on my shoulders. I felt my skin glow. I just gave a little smirk and a small snort. He was always asking me that question when he perfectly knew where I was going.

"Make yourself useful," I turned to him, looking into his eyes, and stuffed my books in his hands. His hands looked strong like every other part of his body. It was a perfect body. We met in school, during the first week and I thought he was a freak. I thought he as gay at first and I just gave him a face. Then I found him out by my car and from there things just went. He was charming and kept mostly to himself as well.

He was charming.

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It was a Saturday night and I needed that bliss. I was scared. I had shaking and my eyes felt sore from crying. I watched it as it sat there, smiling at me. My life, I hated it. I smile and wave to the fuzzy images of people, and at this point nothing felt real. It felt cold in my fingers.

It was cold and smooth.

It was hard to describe to tension I felt as I pressed it to my skin. It felt like it did all those other times. Cold, painful, blissful, realizing. I felt that rush like when your on a roller coaster and you want it to end, but then you don't. I loved this feeling and I hated it, but the only reason I really do it is for the Monster.

I saw him again. My worst nightmare come true, again. I couldn't get away from the obvious and the strong. I wanted to leave and be rid of it and its Puppet. I didn't want to be around it anymore, one more time and Ill die. I want to become that shadow in the dark, I want to be invisible.

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Its eyes haunt me. In my dreams, in my mind. I flinch to every sudden sound and I cant sleep. My head hurts and my stomach feels empty. I cant concentrate. I cant breath. I stumbled down the last few steps from my house.

"Hey!" I was stumbling on the side walk trying to get away from home, I didn't want to be there. Behind me, I heard someone far away yell. Soon, I was being held by two hands and they hurt. I look at the face but I couldn't see anything. My eyes were blurry and useless at this point.

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I woke up to beeping and a soft voice. My eyes felt crusty and disgusting. I felt the blankets on my body and wires across my body. My body felt heavy and immobile. I felt so sick and dead.

Sick to death.

The beeping just wouldn't stop. it just kept going and going until I finally groaned for annoyance. I heard movement and more voices. It all gave me a headache. Then I felt my arm lift itself and I started to rub the crustiness from my eyes. I felt more like shit.

'Can you hear me?' It was a male voice, old male. I nodded my head. 'Good, now how are you feeling? Can you speak?" Too many questions.

"Like," my throat was scratchy, "fucking shit." I was my normal self. Well, I sounded normal to myself and to the laughter I heard. I didn't know where I was and I just didn't want to wake up. I wanted to lay here and think, dream, speak of nothing. Empty forever, an eternity.

"Hey," I know that voice, "What happened? I found you. You were covered in blood and bruises. What happened?" There was worry in this voice. I know this voice.

Trying to remember, my heart squeezes and I felt the tears come again. I remember:

Glass braking, furniture tossed and pushed over. I wasn't screaming like it wanted me to. I held it it. I was proving I don't scream. Blood filled my stomach and the breath was kicked out of me. I know who was doing this to me. I knew.

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I sat in the hospital bed. All wires attached and wounds bandaged. My left eye was swollen and I just sat there watching TV with him. He was always there since Iv been here. He found me, something like he felt something was wrong. He said I was all bloodied and my cloths were ripped and damp. He was there in the ambulance, the emergency, everything. He was great.

Truly great.

"I don't want to stay here," I whispered so only her could hear. He turned his head and looked at me. It took a while for me to get it out, but I finally got it out. This place was suffocating me. I didn't like it at all. I wanted out.

"Where do you want to go?" I didn't know where I wanted to go. I knew he'd take me there if I told him. Sure, I wanted to go lots of places but I wanted to go where I don't feel pressure.

Somehow, the news heard of what happened and caught me and him on tape from the steps of my home to the hospital. Calls were made, police searched my house, social services came in and questioned everyone, even me. I had to tell them the truth. I felt them weighing against me and I just couldn't lie. Even if I did lie, they wouldn't have believed me.

I couldn't lie.

I looked to his face and I saw the same guy who strangeness drew me in. The same guy I met and I gave a weird face to. We became close when he started to date my friend, I wasn't jealous or anything, but when she practically treated him like shit, I couldn't look at him and know things he didn't know. Though eventually he found out on his own.

"Surprise me."

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It was sometime after I had almost healed and was release out of the hospital. The news was still on my story and a law suit went out against the Monster and its Puppet. The Media ate it all up like candy.

Now, I was sitting in his car, me in the passenger seat and my bags in the bag. I didn't know why he did all this for me, but I welcomed it. It was day, almost evening when the sun goes down. Halloween was coming soon and decoration sat in the yards and streets.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

I didn't know how long we were driving but time didn't matter to me anymore. I no longer counted the time it would take me to get away from the Monster because now the Monster was the one leaving. Its been a month since its sentencing and any trace of it was disappearing except for the evidence in my heart. My life was starting to improve and I tried to enjoy what I had left of my shambled life.

As for him, I didn't know what was going on with him and my friend, but my friend doesn't talk much to anymore. I guess from my time in the hospital she had to find other people to be with so we just drifted apart. She doesn't call him as much anymore as I notice as we sat in my hospital room and his cell phone was constantly quiet, the only calls from his parents and some friends, but not her.

I looked over to him as he drove and just stared with my head in my right hand, elbow on the door. I couldn't explain why but things just grew between us. I always wonder if he feels guilty for finding me or something and this is all out of pity.

He's doing this out of pity.

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We ended up at a construction site. They were working on a building where the workers got the metal supports up, some walls, the floors, and elevators up. It was unusual to come here and I didn't know why we were here, but he had brought some drinks and food for us.

"Is this some so of pity trip or a date?" I had my hands in the pockets of my black jacket and I faced the building. The wind started to blow slightly and the sun blazed orange and red. Behind me, I heard the door close, locks lock, and him coming up next to me.

"Not out of pity and I guess it is," he started for the building and we reached the elevator and took it to the highest floor it took us too. When we got out, the sun looked huge and bright. It was vibrant and beautiful. Up here I felt my release.

I was sometime after that I found out that this was where he spent his time when he went missing and he wouldn't answer his cell phone. Here, he was free and himself. No troubles, just his thoughts. Then, he confessed. He thought of me and not my friend. That he just never really thought Id feel the same and that he felt that i would feel like i was betraying my friend for him.

He was thoughtful.

It was then and there that we first kiss, but it didn't last long because of my bruised body and light headiness that he of course brought on and caused me to blush.

I never thought of that cool, smooth beauty that sat at the bottom of my dresser drawer. My head no longer thought of vanishing from the world. I wanted to stay. To live, but I still felt like I was waiting for something.

"Since that day, I felt like it was now or never."

"I didn't know until that day I said surprise me that I wanted this. I guess I wanted it for a while.î

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"We the jury in the case against Akio Higurashi, find to defendant guilty on the charge of child abuse to a minor, Kagome Higurashi, his daughter. The defendants time is twenty years."

That was the last day I will ever see my father. I will never visit him in prison, I wont send him letters. The Monster and the Puppet were gone forever. I was free. I could breath and live.

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It was Halloween. I was walking around hand-in-hand with him and children ran around with parents chasing after them. Cars drove wearily in the lanes and music beat bumped the ground. We were just walking around, aimlessly.

Coming up to his house, I helped his dad pass out candy and he went inside to help his mom. Since I got out of the hospital, I felt like my heart was healing and I was happy with my life. I found a love I can finally keep and cherish and the Monster was finally gone.

Something in my head tugged me.

Looking at the street I saw a child go out in the middle and hear screech of tires. Everything seemed to stop and my heart pounded in my ears and I heard my breath rush in and out. Springing into action, I raced toward the child. I don't know what caused me to but I just did it. I guess I couldn't see a small life die before I lose my own.

I grabbed the child and hugged it to my chest and the impact of the car came full on.

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I ran out when I heard all the yells and screams and I saw that she wasn't at the door and the candy was scattered down the steps. A shot of electricity shot through me.

I saw her hand first, then her back, then the child crying on the other side of her. People came running, the parents grabbed their child and hugged her. I pulled her to lay on her back. Blood streamed from her mouth and her eyes were closed.

No breath, but something called in his head, "I love you, Sesshomaru"

End

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