A/N: (Spoilers for the Citadel DLC – you've been forewarned)

"You know what's next?"

"Oh, I have a few ideas."

She watches as his head tilts back, a laugh escaping his lips; her eyes travel over his neck, tracing the beard that faintly drifts to cover the top of his throat. He's hers. And I won't let anyone take you from me.

"Well, I was going to say we party down, but…I'm open to other suggestions."

She comes closer, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Yeah, yeah, like you aren't dying to have me all to yourself."

He shrugs under her grip, his eyebrows slightly raised in mock indignation "Hey, I try to be altruistic sometimes."

"Sure about that?"

"It's just that I'm easily persuaded to be…not."

"Oh yeah, is that it?"

"Absolutely." A smile plays upon her face as his hands reach down her back, grabbing her, the dark fabric pressing against her skin.

"We have a few days left, I think you can afford to be a little selfish." Her nose crinkles she looks into his eyes, worry in their depths, even as they are pervaded by mischief.

"Yeah, I guess there's an upside to all this" he smirks.

"Oh please. Your baby will be fine, they've upgraded the security and they're fixing her up as fast as they can."

"Yeah, but what if there's an evil clone of me out there we don't know about?" he asks, eyes widening, eyebrows raised.

"Never gonna let that one go are we?"

"Hey, you never know with those fuckers. They could've snuck in one night while I was sleeping and…"

"Well, okay, I'll be on the lookout then."

"I'm just saying. It could be out there."

"Heaven help us all."

"FROM THE DARK REACHES OF DEEP SPACE…" he says in a deep gravelly voice, one hand leaving her body in the flourishing gesture of an orator, "COMES THE THREAT YOU NEVER KNEW YOU SHOULD FEAR… AN EVIL MASTERMIND WHO SLIPS BY UNDECTECTED…"

"wow, someone's enjoying this a little too much."

"…ONLY TO VISIT VENGEANCE UPON THOSE WHO LEAST EXPECT IT …AT THE LAST POSSIBLE SECOND!"

"you're such a dork."

"PEW PEW PEW! BOOOM! CRAASSSHH!"

She steps back, one hand covering her face as she peeks at him through her fingers, weight balanced on one hip as his arms flail expressively.

"OH NOOO! IT'S THAT EVIL MASTERMIND PILOT! HE'S STRUCK AGAIN! WHY WEREN'T WE PREPARED FOR HIS AWESOMENESS?"

"wow."

"MWAHHAHAHAHHH! KNEEL BEFORE ME, BITCHES! BEHOLD MY EPICNESS AND DESPAIR!"

"Okay, you done yet?"

His arms drop, and cross his chest as he shrugs and sits on the couch. "I'm just saying. Missed opportunities. HOW COULD YOU NOT TALK LIKE THIS if you're an evil clone? Honestly."

She rolls her eyes, hand dropping from her face, coming to curl up next to him. "Hey, it was very traumatic at the time, okay?" squeezing his shoulder as she laughs.

"Oh, I was there. When it almost stole the ship I nearly had a heart attack."

"I hate you, you know that?" she pouts as he leans over, beard scratching her neck as he kisses her cheek.

"Hey, just being logical here…you, at the time, were technically replaceable, but the ship…"

"I really hate you." she says, pressing her mouth to his, tasting the inside of his cheek, squeezing his lip ever so slightly with her teeth as they come apart.

"No, you don't." She feels his breath on her neck. "You loooooove me. You think I'm a hero." He mumbles, hand slipping up the back of her shirt. "Might need to get that one in writing."

"Yeah, or your tombstone if you don't quit while you're ahead."

"Oooh, hit a nerve there, did I? Okay, okay, fine, the clone incident goes on the "don't talk about" list. Noted. Not gonna forget that hero thing, though."

"Okay, fine" She sighs as she begins to untuck his uniform from his pants. "Now can we please go upstairs?"

"Well, since you asked so nicely…"

"Oh, come on." She takes his hand as they get up, him bracing himself slightly on the arm of the couch.

"She's a woman who knows what she wants?"

"She is."

"Didn't even buy me dinner first." he shakes his head as they climb the stairs.

"Oh please, I think we're past worrying about your honor at this point."

"Hey!"

"Any other requests while we're on the subject?"

"Oh please, like you don't know what I like."

"Yeah, yeah. C'mere." She says as they settle themselves on the bed, wrapping her arms around his neck as he eases her onto her back.

n