It's Not Over, a gilmore girls fanfic

Disclaimer: I own nothing…not Gilmore Girls…not Chris Daughtry…or any of his music for that matter.

It's Not Over

"I was blown away.

What could I say?

It all seemed to make senses.

You've taken away everything…

And I can't deal with that."

She's…gone. And I just let her go? I can't believe she did that. How could she make me choose? I can't think as fast as her. I thought we were gonna have it all…the family. The home. Everything. It's not all her fault I guess. I mean…I didn't even consider the fact that I might lose her. I didn't mean to…push her away. I was just so sure that I had her…that she was mine. I never should have let her go…I should have gone after her. She'll never forgive me.

"I try to see the good in life.
But good things in life are hard to find.

I'll blow it away, blow it away.

Can we make this something good?"

He said no. He chose "never". Luke and I are…done. God…I loved…love…him so much. I tried for so long to fight the facts. He doesn't love me anymore…he doesn't want me. Apparently…he doesn't need me the way I need him. I couldn't do it anymore. I tried to smile and ignore the fact that he was trying so hard to push me away. Where can I go? Not Sookie's…I really don't feel like talking about "it". Rory and Logan…their last night together. Chris? …No. Not an option. I need Luke in my life somehow…and he wouldn't even look at me if I went to Chris. I really don't want to go home. I guess…I'll just…stay in Rory's room tonight.

"Well I'll try to do it right this time around.

Let's start over.

Try to do it right this time around.

It's not over.

Cause a part of me is dead and in the ground.

This love is killing me…but you're the only one.

It's not over."

What am I going to do without her? It's been…what? Just a few hours…and I already miss her. I miss her smile…the way she always tasted like coffee when I kissed her…all the annoying things she would do just to get on my nerves. I just miss knowing that she was THERE. She was…is….everything to me. She's "the one". I've got to do something. I can't let her go…

"I've taken all I can take,

And I cannot wait.

We're wasting too much time…

Being strong…

Holding on."

I shouldn't have to do this. I shouldn't be sleeping in my daughter's room because I'm hiding from the rest of the house. He should have said yes…and when I walked away…he should have come after me. I guess I know now…he doesn't need me anymore. He probably thinks I'm just being "me". He probably thinks I'm just "being difficult". He doesn't get it…he doesn't get that I was dying…that he was breaking my heart.

"My life with you means everything.

So I won't give up that easily.

I'll blow it away…blow it away."

Thank God…she's home. I never thought of myself to be insecure…but I just thought…for a second…that she might have gone to…Christopher's.

Lorelai?

What Luke?

I'm sorry…I'm so sorry.

It doesn't matter. It's done.

No. Don't say that. We can fix this. PLEASE.

How? You…you don't love me Luke.

What? …You really believe that?

It's true! You just kept pushing me away and pushing me away. I got the message.

Dammit Lorelai! I love you. So much. You mean…everything to me. You and Rory were all I had for the longest time. And now I have April…and I know. I shouldn't have pushed you away…but I was scared. I didn't want you to think…that I was a bad father. I didn't want it to be true.

I never thought that.

June third.

What?

June third. I swear. I'll do anything. I'll climb Mount Everest. I'll bring you a rock from the moon. I'll swim across every ocean.

…You can't swim.

He laughed and pulled her in for the sweetest kiss they'd ever shared. It was full of all the love and passion they'd ever felt for each other.

June third?