"Don't do this Jake. I'm not going to let you kill yourself." I said quickly.
"There is another way… I won't go back ready to die if…" Jacob started.
"Enlighten me." I rolled my eyes.
"Kiss me Bella." Jacob said.
I couldn't believe that he was actually trying trade his life for me to kiss him. He basically just said "kiss me Bella, or I'll go and commit suicide". Honestly. He was my Jacob though. I had already hurt Edward and him enough. But no matter which end of the bargain I picked, I would end up hurting one. Jacob saved my life. Edward is my life. How did that work?
"No Jacob." I said sternly. I crossed my arms.
"If you insist." He shrugged, turning towards the thicket of trees. He started to run.
"Wait!" I called. He turned around smugly.
"I won't kiss you. I won't watch you die, either." I told him.
"If you won't decide, then I'll have to for you." He said.
Jacob crossed the distance between us in one stride. His hands reached to my face as I staggered backwards. How was I going to get out of this? I couldn't outrun him… I pulled my uninjured arm back, ready to punch him.
"Ah, don't do this again Bella. You've already broken one hand." Jacob smiled.
I glared at him. He was right. I would break my hand again. Could I kick him? I probably shouldn't; legs are more important than arms right now. He started forward again. His eyes started to close as the inches between us shortened. I had made up my mind. I swung my leg back and trust it forward as hard as I could. I waited for the bone-crushing impact but something stopped. A cold, smooth, familiar hand held my foot gently. Edward lowered it to the ground and shot me my favorite crooked smile.
"Allow me love." He smiled.
Before I could react, his arm swung forward. I heard the crack as Jacob's jaw broke. Part of me was shocked. The other was pleased. The last part of me was envious, wishing so much that I could have been the one to break his jaw. Jacob staggered backward, clutching his face. Edward was still smiling. He turned towards me.
"Are you okay?" he asked me.
His velvet voice was all I needed to hear. I walked forwards and threw my arms around him. He held me tight and we both ignored Jacob's agonised shouting in the background. Suddenly, my angel was gone. I was holding him one second, the next, he was ten meters away. Jacob had knocked him down. I ran forwards to help. Edward leapt to his feet and started circling Jacob.
"No Bella." Edward said calmly.
"Please stop!" I cried.
Nobody listened. I walked forward cautiously. I couldn't let this happen. I was reminded again of the magnets that I had tried to force together so long ago. They had been waiting for this moment to strike, to kill, for too long. I couldn't force them together anymore. But I couldn't let them just die either. I cried and I shouted for them to stop.
"Shut up Bella!" Jacob roared.
That did it. Edward lunged at Jacob's throat. Jacob dodged him but that happened to be the exact second when Jake phased, leaving the human behind and becoming wolf. Jacob howled loudly and ran after Edward. I couldn't believe my eyes. Edward was smiling. It hurt my ears. I heard Jake's howl, Edward's growl and I heard another noise. It was triumphant. I heard the yell of a woman. I turned slowly and my heart failed. I saw a flaming red haired woman looking at me with desperate longing. She had picked the worst possible timing; But Victoria came anyway. Edward looked up from the other side of Jacob's furry body. He looked horror-stricken. He knew that he couldn't save me this time. I gulped and focused on Edward. I tried to take in every aspect of his beauty. I tried to think of only him as I knew that he would be the last thing I ever saw.
I was annoyed with Jacob, for blocking him from me. Edward… the sound of his voice. I knew that I wouldn't make it, but no matter what, he had to. It was impossible for me to survive. The seconds stretched a billion times longer than what they should have been.
"Jacob!" I heard Edward shout. "Victoria! Kill me whenever you want, you can have me after tonight but save Bella!"
Jacob growled fiercely but instead of facing Edward, he was standing beside him.
"Bella, quick." Edward motioned for me to come behind him.
I ran but it was too late. Victoria ran too. Edward raced up and grabbed me before she could touch me. Jacob lunged in between Edward, with me in his arms and Victoria. His teeth sank into her throat and he ripped her shoulder off. Victoria howled in pain and started circling Jacob. Edward ran me to the tent and set me down.
"Stay here. Promise me." Edward said. His eyes burned mine.
I wanted to say no. I wanted to fight with him and die with him and him alone. I wouldn't stay here. Edward's gaze held mine and I couldn't say no to those topaz eyes. I nodded sadly.
"I love you Bella. I always have and I always will. I will marry you soon. We will live together and we'll put this behind us. You will forget about everything I've put you through. You will survive." Edward said firmly.
His velvet voice rang through my ears. This was his good-bye. I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him. He reluctantly pulled away, too soon for my liking.
"I love you Edward." I whispered.
He gave me a small smile and ran towards the fight. I was crying now. I watched, afraid of what I was going to see. Victoria caught my eye and growled furiously. It was two against one, maybe he would make it. Maybe we would live. Jacob looked at me sadly. That was his missed moment. Victoria lunged at him quickly. Edward dived and attempted to hit her but her hand that was about to take off Jacob's head hit Edward instead. I screamed. Jacob looked shocked at having a vampire saved his life. He then looked angry and growled at Victoria. Edward's arm lay on the ground. He was screaming to the night and I collapsed on the ground. I wanted to run but instead, I just held my torso, as I had all those months ago when Edward left me. That was different. I knew that he lived before. It was like my body had turned inside out and was on fire. I tried to hold myself together as I watched my life screaming infront of my very eyes. I shouted his name. Edward looked up at me.
The shadows under his eyes were more prominent than I had ever seen them. His eyes went from hard topaz to melted gold when he saw my pain. He groaned and shut his eyes.
"EDWARD!" I screamed.
Was he dead? I couldn't bear the thought. I buried my face and wanted nothing more than to die. I wanted to run to him. But I couldn't move. I looked up again slowly and feared the worst. But Edward was standing again. His eyes were filled with hate, longing and the desire to kill. I thought of when I had first met him. He had given me that look. But something wasn't right. Edward was clutching his arm, which seemed to have partially healed. But Jacob… where was Jacob? My eyes reluctantly left my love and searched the ground. There was a big heap of dark fur. I gasped and then screamed again. Victoria looked up. Edward saw his chance and lunged.
He ripped at her. She tried to hit him back. Edward was using one arm but somehow, a second later, Victoria was gone. There were unrecognisable chunks littering the ground where he stood. Edward was shaking but didn't hesitate. He dragged her to our nearly extinguished fire and threw some pieces in. Within thirty seconds, there was colourful, rancid smoke in the air. Edward was still shaking. He still clutched his arm. He broke into a run towards me.
"Oh, Edward!" I sobbed.
"It's okay. We're okay." He chanted, pulling me into his lap. He wrapped an arm around me.
"Your arm?" I asked nervously after a minute.
"I'll live." He said coldly.
"Is it better yet?" I asked.
"In a few minutes I'll be okay."
"And now?"
"I'm just happy it's over." Edward said quietly.
I nodded into his marble chest. But then I remembered.
"Jacob!" I cried.
Edward sprung to his feet and cradled me in his arm. He ran towards Jacob and set me down.
"Jacob!" I cried again.
Jacob was lying down. Half of his body seemed to be ripped open. I could see blood gushing out of his chest. I raised a hand to my mouth.
"Oh Jacob…" I sobbed. I looked at Edward. "Will he make it?"
"I'm not sure, love." He shook his head.
"Can't he phase?"
"If it did this much damage to a wolf, imagine what he'd be like human. That would be a death sentence." Edward sighed.
"Carlisle?" I asked.
"We can try."
Edward got up and stroked my shoulder gently, before running towards the clearing.
"Oh Jacob…" I sighed.
I stroked his fur softly in the places that weren't blood-soaked.
"Please don't die. I'm sorry Jake. I'm sorry. Please live. Please. Please Jacob don't die!" I repeated.
Jake gave a low bark. It sounded like a laugh.
"There is nothing funny about this Jacob Black!" I cried.
Edward and Carlisle were at his side in an instant. Jacob's eyes searched mine for an instant. They were warm and just as I remembered them.
"I love you too, Jacob." I whispered. "I always will. I'm sorry."
He grunted. Carlisle put Jacob carefully onto his back and ran towards the house. I wondered if I would ever see him again. Edward placed his arms around me. Clearly, it had healed. I just turned around and cried into his chest until he was soaked. He stroked my hair and apologised over and over again. His talking became faster. I barely picked up words through my sobbing. I caught one thing though.
"It should have been me-,"
That just made me cry harder.
"I understand if you want to leave, Bella." Edward sighed after I had stopped crying. I gasped.
"Why would I want to?" I demanded.
"You really did love him, didn't you. It should have been me…" Edward's voice trailed off.
"You listen to me Edward Cullen. I love him so much. He is my best friend. He is my brother. He should have been my brother. It's not his ring that was on my finger. It's not him that I would trade my mortality for. Take a guess who is though. If you died, I wouldn't want to live. You're the only thing that's keeping me sane still."
Edward sighed and pulled me closer, leaving a hand in my hair.
"Suppose you really feel that way," he said slowly after a moment. "If he really was like your brother, then I just tore you from your family."
"No." I insisted.
"Bella, this is my fault. If I hadn't hurt him, then we would all be here. We wouldn't be happy but we'd be alive. Jacob wouldn't be hurt and I wouldn't have lost my arm briefly. I would trade my arm to make this better." He thought for a second. "I would trade my life to make this better."
"Do you know what?" I asked quietly. I turned to face him.
"What?"
"If it would affect you at all, I would totally slap you right now."
I half-smiled, but Edward just chuckled.
"I'm not denying that I don't deserve it." He said quietly.
"No, Edward. It's because you can't get over the fact that I'm irrevocably and utterly in love with you! No matter what I say, what I do, you can't understand it…" I trailed off.
"How can you be? After all I've put you through!" He said desperately.
"You haven't put me through anything!" I cried. "Haven't you noticed? Before you came along, just walking could put me on my deathbed! I admit that hanging around stubborn vampires increases that a notch but it's not your fault! And it's over. Deal with it, I'm in love with you and I won't let you leave me again because you're trying to be noble! You saw what happened last time! I can't live without you. End of story."
He cringed slightly. I shouldn't have mentioned the last time he left me.
"I just don't understand…" he started.
"Tell me Edward! Because I really want to know!" I cried hysterically.
"I don't understand how I deserve you." He said simply.
I threw my arms around him and kissed him. It was over. I pushed Jacob out of my mind for that minute and thought of nothing but Edward, the feel of his lips on mine… It was me who had to pull away this time. Edward looked remotely surprised and as unwilling as I usually looked when he stopped us usually. I smiled at him briefly before the sneeze I felt coming on interrupted it. Edward placed a hand on my back and I smiled sheepishly at him. He chuckled.
"Don't you dare…" I warned.
"What?" He asked, a smile on his face.
"Blame yourself because I got a cold." I rolled my eyes.
"If you insist." He shrugged. He leaned towards me again.
"Wait…" I started.
"Hmm?" He asked as he kissed my neck.
"Never mind, I'm being stupid." I muttered.
"Now you really have me curious." Edward teased.
"I was about to say no because I didn't want to give you my cold." I laughed with him this time.
Edward leaned in and I felt guilty about forgetting Jacob. I couldn't help forgetting the guilt as well as I grew steadily more dazed.
It was hard to let go of him. Edward pulled away from me. I pouted, but he merely chuckled at my reluctance.
"If we want to check on Jacob, we better get going." Edward said.
I nodded glumly and climbed onto his back. I kissed his neck before I shut my eyes as he ran forward.
"Thank-you." He said. I laughed.
"Anytime." I called into the howling wind.
I kissed his neck again and buried my face into his back. I was worried about what I was going to see. Edward seemed to sense it.
"It will be alright, love." He assured me.
I nodded into his back. Before I knew it, he had stopped. I wouldn't have realised it until he lowered me to the ground slowly. I put my arm around his waist and he put his around my shoulders. This was going to be hard. I took a deep breath and we walked inside. Jacob was lying on the Cullen's huge couch. He was still a wolf but Carlisle was working on him fiercely. He barely looked up as we approached. Edward sighed.
"Come here, Bella." He steered me to the other room.
"He's not going to make it, is he?" I whispered.
"I'm not sure, love. Carlisle isn't going to give up, but he thinks that there isn't much hope." Edward sighed.
"This isn't your fault." I assured him. "You saved him. I saw that."
"I apparently didn't save him well."
"Jacob Black will live." I said sternly.
It ruined the effect when my voice broke at the end. Then something happened that I never want to see or think about again. A strange gasp came from Edward's parted lips. He began to cry tearlessly with me. I wanted him to stop. I wanted to comfort him. He needed to be strong. If Edward Cullen couldn't get through this, I didn't have a prayer to.
We cried silently into each other's shoulders for a minute. Edward pulled himself together.
"I'm sorry." He whispered.
"You have nothing and will never have anything to be sorry about." I said quietly.
I sneezed again. He snorted. I sighed. I pulled his face towards mine and kissed his cheek. I grabbed his hand and pulled him gently into the next room. How odd. I was comforting a man who had never needed comforting. Edward had just cried. I had been patting his back for once. I was crying too of course but still…
It didn't help much that Carlisle looked frantic. He was working harder than ever. I walked over to Jacob. He looked a bit better. But he was quivering.
"Don't phase, Jacob. Can you hear me? Do not phase!" Carlisle repeated over and over again.
It was too late. Once there was a wolf lying on the Cullen couch and next there was a naked and broken Jacob Black; completely human. Edward lay a blanket over him gently. Carlisle swore.
"Bella…" a strangled whisper escaped Jacob's lips.
"Jacob?" I asked nervously.
"Come here." He pleaded quietly. I obliged.
I rested a hand on his face. He closed his eyes.
"Edward…" he breathed. Edward was beside him in a second.
"Jacob…" Edward sighed. "I'm sorry, my friend."
"I guess I should… say th-thanks. Huh? Bl- I mean… Edward." Jacob snorted weakly.
"Thank-you Jacob. I could have never asked more of you. To stop fighting me after what I did was truly remarkable. It saved Bella. It saved me. It will save you. My apologies. I should have never had hurt you." Edward said softly.
And the magnets stayed together without shooting apart. Tears slid down my face.
"Bells…" Jacob whispered.
"I'm here, Jake" I said.
"I'm sorry I was… a j-jerk." He moaned.
"Don't Jake. I'm sorry. Please phase back. You need to get better." I pleaded.
"I don't think I'm g-gonna get b-better, Bella." Jacob sighed.
"Don't say that." I asked.
"You need to phase back, son. I can fix you. Please." Carlisle pleaded.
"Bells…" Jake whispered.
He lay there quivering. The blanket Edward had lay upon him shattered. There lay a wolf. Edward stood up. He grabbed my hand and tugged gently. I stayed where I was, kneeling at my brother's head.
"Bella, we have to go. Carlisle needs space. We need to leave." Edward told me.
I wiped my eyes.
"I love you Jake." I whispered.
The wolf barked quietly and I turned away. I followed Edward outside. He cradled me in his arms and it was just me who cried. I was happy. I needed someone to comfort me this time.
It seemed normal enough. I lay there in bed, surrounded by blankets and cold, marble arms. It seemed like any other night. I could feel Edward's cold breath on my neck and I could smell his sweet aroma. I could feel his hands under mine. But I was worried. I hadn't heard from the Cullens in 4 hours. I didn't know how Jacob was doing. Edward said that Carlisle needed time to fix him and it would help if there were no visitors yet. So Edward and I spent our time just lying here. I was pleased to know that no one was hurt in the war. It was over. The rest of the Cullens went hunting. Carlisle stayed at home with Jacob. Edward stayed home with me. The rest of the pack waited furiously in La Push, waiting for news. I had just woken up from a quick three-hour sleep.
"Edward?" I asked.
"Hmm?" rang the velvet voice I needed to hear.
"Any news?"
"No, sorry, love." Edward shook his head. "Any interesting dreams last night?"
I blushed. Just what I needed, Edward to hear me muttering about nonsense in my sleep. I tried to remember, but I couldn't.
"I don't remember anything." I shrugged. "Tell em the worst."
"It wasn't that bad…" he snickered.
"What?" I sighed.
"It was mostly… my name. You said it a good dozen times. There was one Jacob in there. And apparently, I look stunning at the altar."
He chuckled and I blushed. It came back a little. Edward was looking like something sent straight down from heaven, waiting for me. It had been a good dream. I covered my face with the blankets. Cold ands tugged it down slightly so his topaz eyes could stare into mine.
"I'm sorry." He whispered. "I hope I didn't upset you." He sounded confused.
"No, I'm just hoping I'm not scaring you away." I blushed.
"It was a very nice dream for me too. If I could blush, I most certainly would have." He smiled. "I'm irrevocably in love with you. Deal with it." He repeated my own words.
I smiled at him. I reached for his lips and kissed him. This was heaven alright, right smack down in the middle of hell. My fingers wound in his tousled hair and I pressed myself closer to him. At first he did nothing and then he gently pulled away.
"Bella, Bella." He teased. I rolled my eyes. He became stiff.
'Edward? Edward!" I was panicking. He smiled.
"Jacob is alright." He looked actually happy about it, too.
I pulled on some clothes and jumped on Edward's back. I climbed off eagerly and ran forward to the house. Realising that I was forgetting something, I went back and grabbed Edward to pull him forward. I opened the door. Jacob smiled at me from the couch. I ran over and hugged him tight.
"That's my Bella." He murmured into my ear.
I pulled away. He was covered in bandages but he was smiling again. He looked at Edward, who smiled.
"So do I still get to kill you?" Jacob asked, laughing.
"I'll give you a few weeks to regain your strength." Edward smiled.
Okay, so my two favourite people in the world could stand to be in the same room together without killing each other. That was a good thing. Jacob was okay. That was the main thing. And Edward and I were alive and Victoria was dead. And we loved each other. Until my next disaster, I was relatively happy.
"Oh and Bells?" Jacob asked.
"Hmm?"
"Thinking of your health… and mine too probably, I promise I won't kiss you again. I am not going through this crap again for a giant mosquito-lover." Jacob smirked.
I laughed. Then Edward laughed.
"A giant mosquito? Quite original. So that would make me a-," Edward started.
"A bloodsucker, a leech, a parasite, a Cullen, a vampire, a giant mosquito and a friend." Jacob finished.