Psychiatrist: Are you aware of why we are having these sessions Mr. McLean?
Chris: Honestly, I can't think of a reason for why I'm here.
Psychiatrist: Well Mr. McLean, you are here because throughout your run as the host of the hit series "Total Drama" you have displayed signs of narcissism, sadism, and borderline psychopathic tendencies. You have been judged as a danger to yourself or others by a court of law and are here to receive court ordered psychiatric help.
Chris: Hey, all of those contestants signed contracts, they would've known what they were getting into if they bothered to read them, and besides, what I did was ratings gold, people loved it.
Psychiatrist: Maybe so, but that's all in the past now and you need-
Before the psychiatrist could finish their sentence, a large man barged into the room, it was Chef.
Chris: Hey man, what are you doing here?
Chef: I'm here to get you, the network executives want a word with you.
Psychiatrist: But-
Chef hands Chris a phone and someone immediately begins calling*
Chris: Hello?
Man: Chris, me and the others have been talking and we've decided to renew your show for another season.
Chris: Really?
Man: Yes, and we have also agreed, reluctantly, to give you absolutely no restrictions.
Chris: Really?! Is there anything else I need to know?
Man: It will be the final season you have, so make it count.
Chris: Understood! I won't let you down! *Chris ends the call* Chef, let's go, I have some old pals to round up!
Psychiatrist: You can't be serious! This man clearly isn't in his right mind, he can't host a show full of innocent people, much less with complete control over it.
Chef: Doesn't matter, they want him back on, he's back on.
With that said, Chris and Chef leave the psychiatrist alone.
Psychiatrist: Oh f*!
Intro
We cut to Duncan, released from prison for currently unknown reasons and given a message telling him to come to a specific location, once he gets there he sees nothing but an oddly shaped building, he enters and sees everyone from the first three seasons of Total Drama, minus Ezekiel for obvious reasons. There was also a fairly large flat screen TV attached to the wall.
Geoff: Hey dude, glad to see you got out.
Duncan: Thanks man, didn't expect to see any of you guys here though.
Geoff: I know, weird coincidences right?
Duncan's eyes widened following a sudden realization.
Duncan: I don't think it's a coincidence, we need to leave now!
He went to open the door in an attempt to escape, but his efforts were futile since it was made to only open from the outside.
Duncan: Oh s*!
Just then, the TV turned on, showing the face of the man they all just loved to hate, Chris McLean.
Chris: Hey campers, miss me?
The response was an assortment of groans and some just plainly replying "no".
Chris: I know, I missed you all too!
Gwen: What do you want from us Chris?!
Chris: I'll tell you once you all get here.
Noah: What does he mean by that?
At that moment, a low rumbling sound started and the entire building began to move, it turns out that the building was actually a large, disguised plane.
Alejandro: Quick! If we get to the cockpit we might be able to get control of the plane and get out of here!
By the time they got to the door and broke it down it was already too late since they had reached their destination.
Chris: Happy landings!
After he said that the plane began going downward at an alarming rate. Fast enough to the point that there was little to no gravity.
Courtney: Oh no!
Justin: If I really am going to die in a large fiery crash, all I ask is that everything above the shoulders remain undamaged.
At that, the plane had finally come back down to earth, leaving everyone miraculously alive, but unconscious.
When they all came to they found that they were in a familiar setting, one they never expected to see again.
Bridgette: It can't be!
Geoff: But I think it is.
Duncan: Oh great we're back in Wawanakwa!
Courtney: Impossible! The entire island sank back in All Stars!
Duncan: You think I don't know that Princess?
Courtney: You don't get to call me that anymore!
Duncan: I don't need your permission!
They walk towards each other but luckily Bridgette prevents things from escalating.
Bridgette: Guys! This is not the time!
They turn away from each other and walk away frustrated.
Owen: Wow, it really is the old island.
Owen was lying on the ground, he started to feel something moving under him as well as muffled screaming, when he got up it turned out to be a broken Justin.
Owen: Justin! Are you okay?!
Justin: I welcome death.
Owen began to help him up and Justin started limping away from him as fast as he possibly could.
Owen: Sorry!
All of them started to look up at the sky and saw two more planes falling towards the island towards the same area they were currently standing in, they began to panic and scattered to safer locations.
They returned and when the smoke cleared one plane was revealed to be carrying the cast of Revenge of the Island and the other holding the cast of Pahkitew Island.
Gwen: Okay what is going on?
Chris: I'm glad you asked Gwen, you see, I'd like to think that the work I've done on this show has lived on in our hearts-
Noah: And our most traumatic memories!
Everyone chuckled slightly at this.
Chris: Your input was unnecessary. As I was saying! And we are all fond of the time we've spent together. Which is why I am sorry to say that this will be the final season of the show.
Everyone began to cheer, glad that their suffering is about to end.
Chris: Okay settle down. Since this is the final season my bosses have decided to give me complete control! That's right, which means everything that they have ever stopped me from doing has pretty much been given the greenlight.
Courtney: I have a question! How is it we are even standing on this island right now? It sank at the end of All Stars.
Chris: Good question. If any of you watched Pahkitew Island you'd know about what happened, you see, that island was actually completely artificial, we just took that island and remodeled it to look exactly like the original.
Cameron: We're on a completely artificial island? Incredible!
Scarlett: So what you're saying is this is the same island I was on last time?
Chris: Don't get any ideas Scarlett, with the new look we also changed the interior structure, so no taking over the island for you this season.
All this did was make her start thinking of a backup strategy.
Chris: Anyways, now it's time to move onto teams, this part is pretty simple, all the cast members from seasons 1-3 are on the same team and they will be known as Gen 1. Cast of Revenge of the Island will be referred to as Gen 2. I'm pretty sure the cast of Pahkitew Island can figure out the rest.
Jo: No fair! Gen 1 has way more players than the rest of us!
Chris: I don't care, the teams are decided and what I say goes.
Jasmine: Why are we listening to this? There's no way a million dollars is worth whatever torture he has planned for us!
Chris: Fair point Jasmine. Which is why since I've decided to up the pain, I've also decided to up the gain, the winner of this season will be getting 10 million dollars!
The announcement of the very significant increase in prize money is what made them become cooperative.
Chris: Glad to see you're all interested. Now I've decided that we will be starting you off with something simple, you will be building your own cabins, you will be making them out of whatever is left of the planes you came here in, you have twelve hours.
He left them to work.
Izzy: Ooh, Izzy's gonna have fun with this!
Leshawna: Careful hon, we need this stuff to make a place to sleep remember?
Izzy: Relax, I can definitely make a great place to live, I had to do it a lot when I was on the run from the RCMP, I've never had so much to work with though.
Cameron and B were drawing up plans for what they intended to build.
Cameron: Okay! Me and B have something worked out let's start building.
Mike: You got it Cam!
Sky: Scarlett, I know we're not friends in any possible definition of the term, but we need your help and you need a place to sleep just like the rest of us.
Scarlett: I'll cooperate for now.
Jasmine: Great! I say we build it up in the trees like last time.
Scarlett: I can definitely do something with that.
Sky: Okay, let's do it!
After the twelve hour mark had passed Chris returned to see the final products.
Chris: So, what have you guys got for me?
He looked around to see that two of them were on the ground and both quite large in size and one was also somewhat large but built up among the treetops.
Chris: Gen 3, trust me when I say that it was a good call to build it up there. Let's see what you have Gen 2.
He went inside to find multiple rooms, air conditioning, and the game console Sam brought hooked up to a flat screen TV.
Chris: Nice setup you got here if I say so myself. Now last but not least, Gen 1.
He saw that it was the largest structure of them all, made sense considering they were the largest group. He saw a flat screen, multiple rooms, air conditioning, and a very large hot tub.
Chris: I'm actually a little jealous of you due to the hot tub. Now, it's time to assign roommates. That's right, you guys are gonna be sharing a room with one of your teammates.
Gen 1: Heather with Leshawna, Alejandro with Owen, Justin with Noah, Courtney with Duncan, Gwen with Trent, Cody with Sierra, Lindsay with Eva, Beth with Harold, Geoff with Bridgette, DJ with Izzy, Katie with Sadie so they don't complain again like when I separated them in season one, and good news Tyler you get to be by yourself since Ezekiel is feral and I didn't want to deal with Blainely.
Gen 2: Jo with Brick, Lightning with Cameron, Staci with B, Zoey with Ann Maria, Dawn with Scott, Mike with Sam, and Dakota will be by herself since she's a giant mutant and is most likely physically incapable of fitting into a room with someone else.
Gen 3: Jasmine with Shawn, Sugar with Ella, Scarlett with Max, Amy with Samey, Beardo with Leonard, Topher with Rodney, Sky will be by herself. Have a nice night guys.
He flew away on his jetpack laughing while many of the campers were left frustrated with whoever they were forced to share a room with.
Chris: That wraps things up for us here on the first episode of the biggest season ever, join us next time to see who will be eliminated first one last time on Total. Drama. End of an Era!