Author: Jo'siris
Rating: K+
Pairing: Sam/Jack
Summary: All tied up and nowhere to go.
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret productions. No copyright infringement is intended.
Feedback appreciated.
Heavy. His legs felt heavy, and dammit, they wouldn't move. Why was it dark?
"Sir?"
Buzzing in his ears, a familiar voice. "Sir?"
Jack realised his eyes were shut. Opening them slowly to accustom himself to the light, he saw… "Holy crap, Carter. Could ya get any closer?"
Sam rolled her eyes. " Nice to have you back, Sir." They were practically nose to nose, and…
"Carter, nice as this is," Why the hell was she sat on his lap? No, get that right,Jack. Straddling his lap. "Is there a reason that you're sitting on me? Or have I suddenly become irresistible?"
"We got captured, Sir. And if you take a look, the reason I am sat on you is because I can't move. They tied us to this chair."
Jack took in his surroundings. Plain room, cold grey, nothing in it except for the chair that he and Carter were so masterfully tied to…together…not side by side, no, that would be too easy. Sam was sat astride him. Her legs were fastened to the back legs of the chair, and her arms were tied to the cut out panels of the backrest. His legs were tied to the front legs, his arms under hers, hands tied around her back.
Crap. "I take it we got…"
"Zatted, yes, Sir." Her breath fanned across his face. Maybe this wasn't so bad after all.
Jack pondered. Maybe if they could tilt the chair backwards. He raised his hips, lifting Sam a little. But with no leverage from his legs…"Lean forward a little, Carter."
"It's bolted to the floor, Sir."
"Humour me."
Sam leaned forward, as much as one could whilst securely fastened to a chair. "Sir, it won't budge."
Jack groaned; her chest had been right there in front of his face, puffing in and out as she leaned over him. Definitely not a bad situation to be in, he thought. Well if they were stuck, they…namely him, might as well have some fun.
"What about your legs? How secure are they? I mean if you moved them up and down the legs a bit, could you work them free?"
Sam looked over his shoulder, and the closeness once again presented his eyes…nose…and mouth with her breasts.
"Sir, I don't think…" Did he just? "Did you just sniff my shirt?"
"What?" Jack feigned innocence. "No, I uh, had an itchy nose, sorry." But he wasn't. "So, can you move them?"
Sam angled her hips to give herself some leverage. With little room for manoeuvre, due to the tight bindings, she tried to slide her feet up the legs of the chair, with no success.
"No, Sir. Whoever tied us knew what they were doing."
Oh what a shame. Jack thought to himself, trying to suppress the chuckle building inside him. "Never mind, Carter. I'm sure we'll think of something."
Sigh. Sam mentally slapped herself. He had known all along that wouldn't work; he just wanted… "I'd say that you have already thought of something, Sir!"
Busted. And he couldn't even deny it, as she was sitting on the evidence. "Can't blame a guy for trying, Carter."
"You're enjoying this a little bit too much, Sir."
He could lie; he could tell her he was annoyed that they had been captured, but he knew she'd see right through him as well as feel what their enforced situation was doing to him. " Father, I cannot tell a lie."
Jack bit his lip so as not to laugh out loud. "What?" Sam asked him, seeing his face suddenly contort.
"Just reminds me of that joke…"
"Huh?"
"You know, the one where Pinocchio tells the girl to sit on his…"
"SIR!"
Was it her or was it getting hot in here? Why hadn't they been rescued? Why did she always seem to get into these situations and always with HIM? Why was she so turned on by the fact that HE was aroused? And did she mention hot? Blame Daniel. If in doubt, blame Daniel. Where the hell was he anyway?
Sam squirmed around on his lap trying to find a way to make herself comfortable. All she succeeded in doing was to make the problem even worse.
"Give it up, Carter, you're only making things hard on yourself."
Pfft.
"Relax, enjoy the ride!" Jack rotated his hips a little. Sam groaned.
Damn him. "What are you all of a sudden, Mr Euphemism?" She really, really wasn't enjoying this close contact or the way his…was rubbing against her…
"Euphemism? That's a big word, Carter…Quite a mouthful!" Oh, Jack was in pun
Heaven.
Sam wished the chair were closer to the wall, any wall, so that she could bang her head against it. She was hot and tired and if he rotated his hips like that one more…yep, horny, definitely horny. Sigh.
Jack was grinning like an inane fool. He knew she was pretending to hate the situation they were in. At least he hoped she was. And she had gone very quiet. Hmm, quiet Carter. So not a good sign.
"What ya doin?"
"Thinking." Of revenge, sweet revenge on Jack O'Neill and his uncomfortable lap and sadistic humour.
"When aren't you? Is it about me?"
Oh the arrogant… "Actually it is."
Woohoo! "What am I doing?" Patented O'Neill cheeky grin. Time to wipe that baby off. Sam thought.
"Same as you are now, only I'm not here." Come on, O'Neill; get that brain cell to work.
"You're not? Well that would be kinda boring, Carter."
"I was just thinking if you were in this position with say…Daniel, or maybe…"
"Carter, no. Don't even…"
"Teal'c…or…"
"Carter!"
"Although you know if it were you and Teal'c, you would have to be the one on top don't you think?"
"CARTER! That. Is. Not. Funny."
Oh it is. Ran through her mind, as suddenly her seating arrangement became a little more comfortable.
"Sorry, Sir. It seems I have deflated your ego." Sam was giggling uncontrollably now.
Both heads turned as they heard a key turn, and the door opened, revealing one Jaffa, and one grinning archaeologist.
"Hey guys, miss us?"
Jack was about to speak when Sam cut him off, pushing her head in front of his face and thus offering him a mouthful of hair. "Oh we did miss you; the Colonel was just saying how much he wished you were both here with us, weren't you, Sir?"
Pfft.
"Awe, Jack." Daniel pinched Jack's cheek. "Maybe next time it could be me and you? Or you and…"
"Just untie us, for cryin out loud. This juvenile game has gone on long enough. I hate it when it's our turn to train the SGC wannabes."
Teal'c untied the pair and watched as they both made a hasty retreat away from each other. Humans, he observed, could be very strange. Two people who had obvious feelings for each other could not cope with being left in a room, alone.
Jack stretched his sore muscles, rubbing idly at the marks left by the ropes.
"Was there any need to have them tie us so tightly? Daniel, if this is your way of getting back at me for the last time we…"
"Actually, O'Neill, it was not DanielJackson's request that you be tied in this fashion; it was I who ordered it. In similar situations that we have encountered one of you always seems to manage to rescue the other. Binding you together in this manner eliminated the threat of escape."
Sam grinned "Good call, Teal'c, and hey, what's a little rope burn between friends?"
Jack shot her a dirty look; Sam merely winked back at him. Oi!
"O'Neill, as you find this situation so tedious, maybe I should be the one who partners MajorCarter when we next train our, as you call them, wannabes?"
Jack spluttered "Teal'c, buddy, don't even get me started on that one." As the words I.Don't.Think.so. Rang through his mind.
"Or Daniel." Sam piped up.
"Indeed."
"Sure, I could live with being tied up with you, Sam."
As Jack walked off down the corridor, Sam swore she heard him murmur, "Oh there's not a chance in hell."
End.