Title: Downfall (1/?)

Rating: M

Content: Angst, people with problems, sex.

Characters: Evan Bourne/OC

Disclaimer: If you recognise their name, I don't own them.

Distribution: ask first

Summary: Evan Bourne's girlfriend is not finding it easy, the battle uphill is a difficult one, can he stop her from her ultimate downfall?

A/N: Another random foray into hetfic.

He stood at the door to the den, a smile on his face despite the fatigue that a 4 hour flight with 4 hour delay inevitably left him with. She was asleep on the couch, cheek resting on her forearm, legs curled up protectively. He shook his head with affection, and walked over to his girlfriend, kneeling in front of her.

"Hey," he whispered, stroking her cheek tenderly, "wake up sleepyhead. Why aren't you in bed already?"

She blinked a couple of times and stretched out, awoken from her slumber. "Evan? You're home already?" Shaking the cobwebs out of her head she sat up, before throwing her arms around the kneeling man, "I missed you."

He returned the embrace enthusiastically, "I missed you too." Pulling her in for a kiss that began softly but intensified, he wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly. It had been a long tour and Evan had found it more difficult than he'd ever found before to be away from her. The worry and fear that constantly afflicted him was assuaged by her appearance and demeanour.

He sat back, light reflecting off his glasses as he stared at her. She struggled to meet his gaze at first, but a gentle caress of her cheek forced her to look at him and she shrugged, "I'm doing ok."

"You look better."

"I feel it. It's been hard..." she looked away, knowing that at least once she'd let him down but even more so that he deserved the truth, "I had a few bad days but this last week has been really good."

Evan's heart beat faster but he knew she was being honest and for that he was grateful, "no one said it would be easy babe."

"I know, but I don't wanna let you down. You've already taken way too much shit for me and from me." Her positive feeling was rapidly diminishing and she hated herself again, feeling like drowning her sorrows in a bottle of wine, but the fact that Evan was still there gave her something to hold on to. He might be disappointed in her, but he hadn't yet given up, and that was what she held on to.

"You're worth it and you haven't let me down. You look amazing and you're doing ok," Evan held her close to him and felt the worry and stress in her body, knowing deep inside she still had a long way to go, but proud of how far she'd come. He knew she was her own worst enemy and just wanted to make her feel safe and happy again.

"Thank you," she whispered, settling into the embrace and feeling a sense of peace and security wash over her. Evan always managed to do that. They both sat on the couch, curled in each other's arms. "So how was this tour?"

"Tiring," Evan sighed, "but fun. It's always nice to go back to St Louis, and everyone just seemed in a pretty good mood considering how long we were away this time."

"That's good. How is everyone?"

"Mostly good. Randy and John are on good form at the moment."

She forced a smile, "I miss those two clowning around."

"They miss you too." Evan felt her tense again and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I'm sure you'll be able to go back soon. You're doing great, and you've been training, haven't you?"

"How can you tell?"

"I just can."

"At first, it was really hard. I felt like giving up," she sighed.

"Is that when you had a bad day?" He asked gently.

She sat up a little and moved away, sitting on the side of the sofa, "I just felt like there was no point. I'm never going to get back to where I was, I'm always going to be the same loser everyone always said I would be. So yeah, I hit it hard. Two days I think, I don't remember."

"But you came through it," he prompted gently.

"I looked in the mirror and thought that you'd be so ashamed of me, and you deserve better than that."

"I'm so proud of you for not giving up."

"Really?" She looked at him in surprise.

He just nodded and continued, "how long have we been in this industry babe, how many people have been destroyed by what we do? I know you're stronger than them, and I'm so proud that you're still fighting."

"I don't want to stop fighting."

"Then you won't." Evan hoped that his words belied his fears. "We," he emphasised the word, "will never stop fighting."

She moved to cuddle up next to him again, trying to convey everything that words couldn't. He held her tightly and made a silent prayer that they had gone through the worst of times, and that they could move on together.

Evan's body ached and he was exhausted, so with reluctance he woke his sleeping girlfriend and suggested that they go to bed. She smiled sleepily and stood up, being guided by the young wrestler up the stairs to their room. They barely spoke as they undressed, but as soon as they fell into bed and found themselves again in each others' arms they fell asleep feeling more content than either had been in a long time.

Jenn woke up early, as she had become accustomed to doing since Evan had been away on his most recent tour. She would usually get straight up and get some coffee going, but this morning she had no desire to go anywhere. Evan was asleep next to her, his worry and fears hidden in peaceful slumber. It was an image that so many times she had thought she would never see again, as her behaviour had pushed Evan further and further away.

She knew it had been hard on him, harder than he would ever let on to her. She'd pushed and pushed, barely even knowing what she was doing, and still he was there. He stuck by her when practically no one else did, although she had no idea why. She would be eternally grateful that he hadn't given up, because that gave her something to continue fighting for.

Evan moved slightly and pulled Jenn closer to him, snuggling into her body. She savoured the feeling, the safety and security that he gave her. She cursed that she hadn't seen it before, that she hadn't appreciated what he did for her, how stupid she had been. She'd risked so much, and the thought of losing what she had left scared her. And to be honest, she wasn't sure she was strong enough to keep him, or worthy of his patience and effort. Her self destruct mode was legendary and explosive, and it was a daily battle to keep it under control. Each day might be the last, and she wanted to make the most of it, before she did what she inevitably would, and messed things up.

Evan was awoken by gentle kisses to his lips, his cheeks, his eyelids, his forehead. It was the best feeling in the world to wake up being adored by the one he loved above all others. He opened his eyes slowly and pulled his girlfriend to lie on top of him, grinning mischievously.

"Good morning gorgeous," he whispered. "Sleep well?"

"Mmmmm," she breathed, "always do with you home." Knowing what he wanted, she kissed him again and pulled the covers over both of them, feeling wanted and loved and hoping that she could make him feel the same.