He can't believe she's gone.
He sits on the floor, staring at their bed. How long had it been since they shared that bed? Too long. And now she was gone. Stolen.
And this time, there was no redemption. Even the man was dead, He had stolen something that could not replaced.
He closed his eyes, remembering the first time they had spoken. God, she had been so beautiful. She was still beautiful. Even more since the birth of their son. Their son. How he missed his mother. How could Aaron fix that? It could not be fixed.
Irreplaceable and unfixable: two things Aaron Hotchner could not stand. He fixed everything in his house. He had sneakingly replaced Jack's favorite toy after stepping on it one night. He had replaced Haley's car when she totaled it 3 years into their marriage. He had... None of that mattered. None of that stuff mattered, because he hadn't been his best to her.
The job was important. The job was... He saved people's lives. He saved them and yet, he couldn't save his own wife. Ex-wife. He couldn't save his own marriage. How had he let that happen? How had he let her go? He opened his eyes, remembering them on the bed, picking out names for their first child. One of many. Haley always wanted at least 3 kids. A little girl. She wanted Jack to know what it felt to be a big brother to a girl...and now he'd barely remember what it was like to have a mother. And it was his fault. He could have worked at home more... called more. Garcia could have gotten him some tech thing that let him see Jack and Haley more. He had never even asked. Too focused on the damn job. Too focused on work. Now one day he'd retire and what would he have to look forward to? He had lost everything to work. The only thing he had left was his son and when Jack was old enough to realize that his dad put the job before him, would he have him?
Aaron sighed. He needed to make a change. He needed to show Jack everything Haley would have shown him. He needed to show Jack that he wasn't always so serious. God, Haley. How he missed her so much. She would have known how to make Jack feel better. She would have kissed all his pain away. and He had let her die. He was supposed to be better than this. If his job was more important, then he should have done the damn thing well enough to save her.
He was so angry. So angry at everything. How could the team let him down.
No. They hadn't.
They hadn't let him down at all. Emily had been... Emily had been there everyday, helping him with Henry, making sure they were eating. Emily had been a godsend. Haley's sister was here now and Emily still showed up, just to make sure Jack was okay too. She'd sit down with him and talk to him about his mom and dad, the way she saw it. How she had stories about him and Haley, he didn't know, but she did and they were nice. Jack liked them and would fall asleep listening to them.
Reid had visited a few times to spend time with Jack as well. Hotch had figured that Reid was the one that has something to do with Emily visiting so much. The man had grown up without a father and knew how hard it was to grow up in a single parent home. Hell, the man had lost his father just alittle older than Jack was now. It surprised him how good Reid was with Jack. He was definitely not the same man who had awkwardly hold the baby years ago. That probably had something to do with JJ.
JJ had been over as well with Henry. Jack loved Henry. He protected him, showing the toddler his hiding spots and giving him advice. Jack would have been such a great brother and JJ was giving him a chance at being a substitute. Her presence was always nice. A mother's touch.
His team were his family. They weren't at fault for this. They were doing everything they could then and now. They had protected him when Erin Strauss had her hearing. They were at the funeral, comforting him and Jack. They were were irreplaceable and maybe,just maybe they could help fix this situation...at least make it bearable.