The rain hadn't stopped for days. The world was gray and cold and distant as Marinette stood on her balcony. Rivulets twisted and turned as they found the path of least resistance down the roof – grooves between the shingles giving way to new paths and allowing some tiny rivers to converge and others to split apart. Planting her hands on the railing, she tilted her head back and let the rain mingle with her own tears. Her mind drifted, thoughts carried away by the rhythmic sound of water clinking against the metallic rail, plopping into existing puddles, drumming down on the roofs surrounding her.
The memory of recent events bombarded her and she winced. She had, undoubtedly ruined any chance of being with Adrien. Not only was she inept at even being able to speak like a normal human, but she was clumsy to boot. The way she behaved toward her friend and crime fighting partner, Chat Noir, was beyond reproach, and to top it all off, she had endangered both of their lives because she was so focused on what was happening in her personal life. In the three years she had been fighting alongside Chat Noir, they had never been in as much danger as they were earlier that evening. Paris had never been in as much danger.
She reflected back on what had happened.
The school dance was coming up and she had been hoping that Adrien would ask her. It was their last dance ever, and she refused to let anything get in her way. If all else failed, she was going to ask him. There was only a week left before the dance. Apparently, Adrien hadn't asked anyone to the dance, and no one had asked him. Gritting her teeth, she walked up the stairs at school to their classroom. He was already there.
"Umm…Adrien." He looked up at her. "I after talk to school with you…I mean I need school you to talk…I uh mean…After school, I need to with you talk?!" He smiled at her, the light playing off his eyes.
"You need to talk to me after school, right?" He managed to iron out her jumbled words, and she nodded at him frantically. "Sure, no problem!"
The day had gone by relatively accident-free as the bell released them all from school. Marinette waited in the classroom. Five minutes passed. Then ten. Then twenty. After thirty minutes, she set out to look for him. He had said he would talk to her after school, but where was he? When she got to the lockers, she heard his voice, followed by the voice of Chloe Bourgeois. Pushing open the door, she saw Chloe's arms draped over Adrien's shoulders, their faces excruciatingly close. Chloe's eyes cut to where Marinette was standing.
"Oh! Adrikins, I'd love to go to the dance with you. I thought you would never ask."
"Wait..wha…" Adrien followed Chloe's line of sight, and his eyes locked with Marinette's.
Marinette knew it was silly. It was just a school dance, but still her eyes stung, and she felt a rain drop roll down her face. But she wasn't outside. For a moment everything stood still, and then she bolted. She heard what sounded like Adrien calling her name, but she refused to slow down. Years of running throughout Paris as Ladybug had made her fast and quiet. She dipped around a corner, then another one, and yet another one. She didn't want to hear what Adrien had to say. Some days she felt like he cared about her, and other days it seemed like all he cared about was Ladybug, and now it looked an awful lot like he cared for Chloe Bourgeois to her.
It wasn't that she was completely dissatisfied with the flattering things he'd said about Ladybug in the past, or even the way he occasionally stammered when he met Ladybug. The problem was that he didn't like the Marinette version of Marinette. In fact, Marinette really felt that if Adrien knew she was Ladybug, he'd probably stop liking Ladybug.
She paused, straining to hear any footsteps that may have been in pursuit. Silence. She sighed, looking down at the puddle on the ground. She watched the sporadic drops of water hit the puddle and cause tiny chaotic ripples. She wasn't sure how long she stood there looking at the puddle. If it hadn't been for Tikki, she may have stayed in that alley forever.
"Marinette!" A tiny voice had pulled her back to reality in the alley. "Are you really looking at the puddle?"
"What do you mean Tikki?"
Tikki paused. "Marinette…I think you may need to transform."
Marinette looked at her Kwami inquisitively. "And why is that?"
"Look at the puddle again, Marinette."
When Marinette looked down she saw a clear set of ripples start from the center of the puddle and move to the outer edge. Then she saw it again. And again. These ripples weren't being caused by raindrops anymore. These were being caused by something big. The windows on the buildings above her rattled rhythmically with the ripples in the water.
"I think you may be right, Tikki. Spots on!"
The rain made it harder to run across the buildings, but within a few moments, Ladybug managed to find a giant sculpture taking out portions of buildings. She scanned the scene, trying to determine if it was the akumatized victim or if it was being controlled by someone else.
"Fancy seeing you here, m'lady!" A familiar voice broke her concentration.
"Hello, Chat Noir. Help me figure out exactly where the akuma is hiding. This thing is causing so much damage, we need to take care of it fast."
"At your service. Let's see if we can figure out what clawsed this." He smiled, glancing over at Ladybug.
She snapped her head towards him. "Look. I need your help, not your puns right now. Either help, or get out of the way, ok? I don't have time for you to play around today." Her words were harsh, and Chat Noir took a step backwards. He searched her face for a moment and nodded silently before taking off to get a different view of the situation.
A few moments later, her compact rang. "Ladybug, I've searched the area. I think the actual victim is a sculptor across the way from where you are. It looks like the akuma may be in his chisel. How do you want to approach this one?"
She'd snapped her compact closed and took off. Her mind still flittered back to Chloe and Adrien by the lockers. Swinging between the giant sculptures legs, she focused her sights on a frantic and angry looking artist. He was shouting something about being Sculptrocity or something like that. Something collided with her, sending her body flying. She tried to get her bearings in the air, but the sky and the ground were the same color thanks to the setting sun and the rain-soaked streets.
The moment her head hit the pavement, she realized that she hadn't waited to hear more about her adversary. She hadn't observed him long enough. She hadn't made any plans with her partner. She jumped in blindly.
Getting up, the world spun around her. She tripped, bumping into a car. Stumbling, she tried to steady herself.
"Ladybug!? Are you alright? Hey, look at me. You got hit hard." It was Chat Noir. "Wait just a second. You need to rest, and we need to figure out how to handle this guy. It looks like he may have two akumas. I don't know how, but if he touches something with his chisel it comes to life. But it also looks like any clay that he throws has special properties too. That's what you got hit with." She should have listened to her partner. She should have been grateful for his advice. But she was too angry. She was angry at Chloe. She was angry at Adrien. She was angry at Chat Noir. And she was angry at herself.
"Get off of me, fleabag! Ok? I don't need your help. I've got it. I can handle it. Like I always handle everything. So just go fulfill your support role, and if you can't do that then just leave. I don't need you. Got it?" She pushed her hand against his chest and tried to ignore the fact that she couldn't even budge him. She tried to ignore the fact that the world was still spinning. She tried to ignore the fact that he looked at her like she had just slapped him. And more than anything else, she tried to ignore the fact that his giant eyes looked so much like Adrien's.
Despite her words, Chat Noir stayed by her side through the fight. Ultimately, they came away victorious, but both of them sustained greater injuries than before. There was no "pound it" after her miraculous ladybug returned the city to normal. There was no "bug out" as she limped away, unable to look her partner in the eyes. Unable to face her own pain and the pain she had caused someone else.
Her eyebrows furrowed from the memories. The rain continued to fall, baptizing her with cold pellets. A small jingle interrupted her thoughts, causing her to open her eyes. Chat Noir perched on her railing, his feet beside her hands.
This wasn't the first time he had visited her. Ever since the Ladybug version of herself had asked him to keep an eye on "her friend" Marinette when Nathaniel had been turned into The Evillustrator, Chat Noir would periodically pop by.
"You don't look like you're doing so well, Princess." A wry smile pulled at the edge of his lips. His eyes seemed strange and Marinette struggled to look at him. He didn't know that it was her who said all of those hurtful things to him, but as she looked at him, she could see the effect those words – and her carelessness during the battle – had on him. He did not seem to exude the same playful and infectious attitude that he normally carried with him.
"Would you like to talk about what it is that's making you make that face?" He slipped his feet off the railing, leaving his legs to dangle towards her as he sat beside her hands.
Did she really even deserve to share her problems with him? After she caused him so much pain? And yet, even as she debated with herself, she felt her lips open.
"I guess I didn't have the best of days. I…" she paused and glanced at him, her eyes meeting his. She swallowed. "I was hurt by someone today who I trusted, but I also hurt someone who trusted me. And now I don't know how to face either of those people. I acted selfishly, and even though everyone walked away from the situation, I think the way I behaved may have hurt them more deeply than anything else could have."
She felt Chat Noir watching her intensely as she spoke. One of the things she liked most about talking with him was that he never asked her for more information than she was willing to give. It made her feel safe when she spoke to him, and she extended the same courtesy to him on the rare occasion he would share his problems with her.
"Hmm." He gracefully slipped his legs off the railing and leaned against it, turning his head toward Marinette. "I can't really share any advice on that." He let out a dry laugh. It was a strange sound to hear coming from him and Marinette looked up at him. When she was fighting as Ladybug, she always felt so strong and invincible, like nothing could overtake her. Standing there, in the rain, beside Chat Noir, she suddenly realized how small she was. Fighting beside him, she never noticed, but Chat Noir was much taller than her. His chest was broader. His arms stronger. And yet, his voice sounded so small with the next words that came out of it.
"It would seem that I'm in a similar position as you are, Princess. Today I hurt someone I care about and was then hurt by someone I care about. Although both were instances that may have been caused by misunderstandings, it doesn't matter if the two people still walk away hurt. Especially if they never clear up the misunderstanding. If people don't talk to each other, then all they take away from a situation is their own understandings of what happened. There are two sides to every story. Don't you think?"
The rain picked up, and a flash of lightning briefly illuminated the sky. Marinette's eyes widened as she got a better look at Chat Noir. His suit was ripped in multiple places revealing broken and bruised skin. She knew the fight had been rough, but she didn't realize just how bad it had been for her partner. Quickly reflecting back, she realized how many of the blows he took the brunt of. How many times he pushed her out of the way.
"Chat, should you go to a doctor? You're hurt!" Without thinking, she stepped in front of him, reaching her hand out, she gently touched an area of exposed skin on his chest. A small hiss escaped his mouth at the touch. She moved to take her hand away, but one of his own grasped her wrist, keeping her hand on his chest.
She looked up at him. The dim lights from the street catching a gleam in his eyes.
"We make quite the pair right now." His voice was deeper than she was used to. "We're both wet, hurt, and alone." His other hand snaked around her waist and pulled her closer to him. He bent his head slightly and whispered, "Tell me no or to stop right now, Princess, and I will leave your balcony. The call is yours."
His breath was warm against her skin. An image of Adrien flooded her mind for a moment before she pushed it away. He did not want her. Part of her felt like even Chat Noir, in this moment, with his arm around her and his lips a hair's breadth away from her, did not truly want her. Not first. She knew how he felt about Ladybug. But in that moment of hurt, he did not go home, he did not call Ladybug, he came to her. Even if she was second best, she would accept this, because wasn't she doing the same thing to Chat Noir? Wasn't Adrien the one she loved first and foremost? Chat Noir said they made quite the pair. He had no idea.
He had pulled away from her slightly, waiting patiently for her to make up her mind. She leaned forward and kissed his neck, the rainwater making his skin cold.
His hand released her wrist. Her hand delicately traced his exposed skin while the other found his golden hair and tangled itself in it. She looked up at him, and he pulled her closer, one hand pressed firmly into her back, the other cupping the side of her face. Their lips met. Tenderly at first. But soon their kisses grew more urgent. She nipped at his bottom lip, and he returned in kind, exploring her lips, her jawline, her neck, her ear.
She moaned softly, surprising both of them. The feelings of not being good enough, of not being pretty enough, of simply not be enough vanished under his lips. Her skin warmed as heat radiated from her. Her fingers found the zipper on the front of Chat Noir's suit, bringing it down to his navel and exposing the rest of his chest. She ran her hands across his skin, reveling in the knowledge that she was not the only one who's body was heating up from the encounter.
He sighed against her touch and rested his forehead against hers, seeming to enjoy the sensation of her fingertips tracing his skin. She licked her lips and kissed his collar bone, earning a jolt and what could only be called a purr from him. She placed kisses up his neck, and gently caught the bottom of his ear between her teeth. Swapping her teeth for her lips earned her another appreciative purr.
His fingers found the hem of her soaked shirt, and were seeking the warm skin on her stomach and back, slowly urging the shirt higher up her torso. He had reached her lower ribs when a voice broke through their breathing and the sound of the rain.
"Marinette? Are you up on the terrace?"
Marinette and Chat Noir looked at each other. Even in the dim lighting, the need was apparent in both of their eyes. But Marinette's mother's voice grew closer and more frantic on the other side of the door.
"Until we meet again, Princess."
"Goodbye, Chat."
She reluctantly removed her hands from his chest and hair. They stared at each other for one more moment. He kissed her gently, one last time, before disappearing in the darkness.
"Marinette? Good grief. You're soaked. What are you doing up here in a storm? You'll catch cold if you're not stuck by lightning first!" Her mother stood in the doorway, beckoning for her to come inside.
"Yes, Maman."
Glancing over her shoulder, she smiled to the invisible, watchful eyes she knew were still there.
