Title: First Come, First Serve

Author: FrostedMerry

Spoilers: Season one and two, plus "The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation".

Summary: It really was first come first serve, or maybe it was just Howard. Henny!

This story is in no way related to my Costumer Conundrum World/Canon. I was asked nicely by Boomwhom to write Howard and Penny and this is the plot bunny that tumbled into my brain. (Clearly though, I still 3 Sheldon, since I'm still trying to fix 'TECOF' and TPTB's shitty treatment of Sheldon's career. And lookit that, I can't seem to keep the Shenny out, so it's Shenny friendship.)

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters contained herein. I'm not making any money from this and no one else is either.

Status: in progress

Rating: M

As the guys trooped up the stairs, Sheldon leading triumphantly, the other three were arguing vociferously. "You will tell him; it was your idea and you were the one working the damn opener!" Howard hisses at Leonard.

"Yeah dude, it could totally wreck his career if you let him tell everyone he's discovered magnetic monopoles when he didn't. He'll be a laughing stock, man." Raj added in a fierce whisper. They shoved Leonard towards the door that Sheldon was walking through, on the phone with his mother, both hissing, "TELL HIM!"

"Dude I'm going home. I don't even know why we got out of the cab." Raj whines plaintively.

Howard preens, "I know why I got out here man! Because there is a cheesecake scented goddess next door that probably missed us! I'm going to go let her know we are back." He then straightened his clothes and knocked on Penny's door.

Penny opens the door and smiles brightly at Howard, "Howard, you're back!" And she sweeps him up into a fierce hug. He is in hog heaven, he can smell her pretty smell and feel her soft skin where his hands rest on her back. Her chest soft against his chest, all wrapped in pretty red fabric. He tilted his pelvis away from her in hopes of hiding the fullness he had cramped in his pants. She leaned back a little, "Are you happy to see me, or did you just shove a roll of quarters in your pocket?" She giggled, "I did miss your silly innuendos and pick up lines. Every time I went out and some guy tried to pick me up with a cheesy line, all I could think of was you!"

Howard did a really awesome fish impression, mouth agape and slightly floppy. "I," he started to stutter, but she breezed on. "I stopped by to check on your mom and we ended up watching game shows til really late, so she made me stay over. I've never slept on satin sheets before, they're so slippery, I was worried I'd fall off your bed." Howard's brain promptly stopped working at all, as images of Penny, nude perhaps, lounging in his bed flittered through his brain.

Then she kissed him and it was all over for him, he was lost in a sea of longing and soft lips on his. She dragged him past the doorway and shut the door, shoving him up against it. Her hands were dragging at his hips pulling him tighter to hers. He just stood there, stunned, his body however was not remotely stunned, it was throbbing and straining to reach her. She leaned back again, "You still with me Howard?" She asked gently, her voice husky. He managed to nod before she dived back in, testing the seam of his lips with her tongue. He gasped and she took that as an invitation to stroke her tongue along his and when he licked at her lips she took his tongue in her mouth and sucked gently which made him throb harder. His hands grabbed at her hips roughly, pulling her hips against his, grinding against her.

She cooed into his mouth and grabbed his ass firmly, then she turned and led him to her bedroom. The world could be ending and neither of them would have known it, they were fully invested in learning each other. She pushed him down onto her bed and pulled her shirt over her head, leaving her standing in a dark bra that lifted her wonderful bounty to his mouth level, which she promptly leaned into. He wrapped one hand around her back and the other gently caressed her bra bound chest, making her coo again. Then she reached back and undid the clasp freeing the bounty to his eyes; his face was adrift in the sweet softness of her and he was pretty sure he could just die now cause nothing could ever top this. Until she started teasing his lips with one, then he took a firm hold of her and suckled lustily.

Then she was pulling at his shirt, the snaps all popping open easily and he had to let go of her so she could pull it off his arms. "Penny, oh Penny," Howard murmured into her lips, "you are so beautiful."

He felt, more than saw, her lips form into a grin and she cooed into his mouth, "Help me get these clothes off, so I can show you how much I missed you, Howard."

Sadly they were interrupted by a pounding at the door. Howard stood up so fast he nearly knocked Penny over. "If that's Sheldon, I am not here!" Howard squeaked quietly.

"Oh it's not," Penny replied, "he always does that weird triple knock thing with your name. It's not him." She sadly grabbed her shirt and put it back on, sans bra and went to answer the pounding at the door.

Howard trailed after her in his long sleeved shirt, still a little frightened about what could be on the other side of the door. Penny opened the door mid-pound causing Leonard to nearly punch her in the face. "What the hell Leonard!" Penny shouted, further surprising Leonard who cowered back a little, before remembering why he was there.

"I just got kicked out of my apartment, can I stay the night?" He whined, then he caught sight of Howard behind her, "What the hell are you doing here? I thought you guys bailed on me and you're hiding over here?" He started to move towards Howard but Penny blocked him.

"Howard is here at my invitation, something that can't be said for you. What the heck did you do to Sheldon to make him kick you out?" Penny said loudly. Leonard cowered a bit in the face of her anger, "We played a little joke on him and he's taking it badly."

"We?" Shouted Howard, "Oh no you don't, you weasel. You decided that the only way we were getting out alive was you messing with his experiment, and now it's backfired on you. Raj and I both said it was too far but you didn't listen. It's one thing to joke about tossing his Kindle out in the snow and another entirely to deliberately mess with his experiment. Man that was millions of dollars and it could seriously set back his career years!"

Now Penny was seeing red, she rounded on Leonard, "You know how Sheldon is about his work and his Nobel. How could you do that to him! He's your best friend and he saved your life." At this both guys winced, surprised that she knew that. "Yeah I know all about why the elevator doesn't work. Sheldon told me about it. I like Sheldon, he's like a really tall little brother. And you know he has trouble dealing with new situations! I can't believe you. You horrid little weasel, get out now!" Penny cried, pushing Leonard out the door and slamming it firmly in his face. She turned to Howard, who cowered back. "Swear to me you had nothing to do with this!" She cried, tears running down her face.

"No Penny I swear, me and Raj tried to talk him out of it. I mean Sheldon was a huge pain in the ass, but still we knew that going in." Howard explained, "We tried to tell Sheldon when the first fake results started coming in, but Sheldon was so excited that he wouldn't listen."

Penny's face softened a little, but she was still crying a little, "I have to go check on him. He must be devastated." She kissed his cheek and peeked out the peephole on the door to see if Leonard was still out there. "He's gone," she bit off and rushed out the door. She didn't even knock, just barged right through the door of 4a like she always had. She didn't see Sheldon, so she headed back to his room. She knocked lightly, "Sheldon honey, you ok?"

The door flung open, leaving Sheldon standing in the door, his body vibrating in fury. When he realised it was Penny his shoulders drooped. She reached out to him, expecting him to back away, but was surprised when he allowed her to hug him. "Oh honey, I'm so sorry. That was a super rotten thing Leonard did. Please tell me it's not going to ruin your career. I know how much this trip meant to you."

Howard, still scared out of his wits, hovered in the hallway, hoping Sheldon wouldn't see him. He watched in awe as Penny hugged Sheldon, she really was a goddess.

Penny rubbed circles on Sheldon's back. Finally he calmed enough to talk, "Well I had to call Dr. Gablehauser and explain that the results that I had emailed about previously had been maliciously tampered with and that I had to retract my statement that I had confirmed string theory and forever changed man's understanding of the universe. He is currently trying to get a hold of Leonard, Raj and Howard."

At this Howard squeaked and grabbed at his pocket, trying to get his phone out before it could ring, all the while hot footing it to the hallway as quietly as he could.

"Crap on a cracker Sheldon. He really ruined your expedition thingy didn't he?" Penny cried, tears rolling down her face, "Oh honey, is there anything I can do to help?"