This popped into my head out of the blue, and the moment I allowed my muse to play with the idea she jumped up and down with glee. It was supposed to be only a one-shot, but then it spiraled out of control and turned into a 'Four Weddings and a Funeral' AU. :-)

I also wrote this as a birthday and thank you gift for a dear friend on Tumblr who gave me the best present ever by sending me a signed picture of Colin. I can't thank her enough for that ... the only thing I can give her is this little ficlet in five parts.

For your information, the next two parts are already written and I intend on updating every Sunday and Wednesday.

Last but not least … special thanks as always go out to my beta reader mearcats who corrects all the silly mistakes I make.

Wedding I – Robin and Regina (June 2011)

Emma slipped into the church, being careful to close the big door as silently as possible. No one looked back at her as she stepped into the last pew, and she let out a relieved breath as she settled in, glad she didn't miss the actual vows.

She wasn't really a fan of weddings and she didn't need a therapist to tell her that her dislike of these occurrences stemmed from her own experience with Neal. He hadn't left her at the altar, but it had been close. She'd thanked God and the universe a few times for that after he'd left her hanging and she ended up in juvie for a crime he'd committed. Not to mention the pregnancy test she'd taken because she'd feared he might have knocked her up that had fortunately showed her a minus instead of a plus.

She sighed inwardly as she remembered how trusting she'd been at seventeen, how she'd believed after her shitty childhood she would finally have a life worth living. That the tables were turning for her. But of course they hadn't, she should have known that. Maybe then the fall wouldn't have hurt so much.

Forcing herself to let the past stay in the past, she concentrated on the goings-on at the altar. Everyone was smiling – the bride and the groom, the bridesmaids and the groomsmen. She was happy for Robin and Regina, too. It wasn't as if they'd had an easy life so far. They deserved to be happy.

The vows were only minutes away when Emma heard a sound behind her. Maybe it was the fact that she'd sneaked into the church herself earlier that made her hear the faint squeak of the doors opening. Tilting her head, she caught movement out of the corner of her eye as someone slipped into the pew opposite of hers. She turned her head just a fraction further to eye the newcomer, being pleasantly surprised when she took him in. He was definitely handsome, his hair a touch too long, artfully ruffled, scruff covering his cheeks, and from what she could gather he cut quite the figure in his three-piece suit.

She was so immersed in studying him that she was unaware of him watching her, too. A jolt rushed through her when their eyes locked, and she hoped he wouldn't see the blush rising up in her cheeks. Thankfully they reached the 'exchanging vows' part right in that moment and she turned her head forward again.

The vows were beautiful, and she had to admit she needed to gulp down a few tears. She didn't normally have much of a romantic side, and she wanted to escape the first rush of congratulations when the freshly married couple stepped out of the church.

She stood up silently just a few minutes before the end of the service, avoiding looking over at the other side, not wanting to get caught eyeing the handsome stranger once again. With a relieved sigh she walked into the sun, tilting her head upwards to enjoy the warmth for a few seconds before she needed to move.

Fortunately, her task had been to provide the emergency pack of cigarettes. She desperately needed one right now. She'd congratulate the happy couple later, right now she walked briskly around the corner of the church and disappeared into the shrubbery, looking for a place where she could smoke in peace without getting disturbed, finding just the right spot moments later.

But apparently someone had followed her, the branches rustling as someone walked through them to join her in her hiding place. She wasn't even that surprised when her pew neighbor stepped beside her.

"Can I have one?" he asked and she handed him the pack wordlessly, contemplating whether to engage in small talk or not. The handsome stranger took the decision out of her hand as he blew out a stream of smoke and turned towards her, bowing slightly at the waist. When he straightened again he shot her a lopsided smirk and said, "Killian Jones, by the way."

"Emma Swan," she replied, taking the pack back from him and lightening a cigarette for herself, almost closing her eyes as she breathed in the first drag of smoke. She didn't smoke very often, only at special events, and she actually cherished the few times she allowed herself to enjoy a few cigarettes.

"Emma Swan?" he questioned, his accent making her surname sound completely different. She wasn't sure she liked it, especially not when that accent was wrapped in a very handsome package. And judging from the smirk on his face, he knew damn well how handsome he was. He knew exactly what worked and what didn't, so of course his accent became even more pronounced as he added, "Lovely name."

"Save it," she shot back, resisting the urge to roll her eyes.

"Pardon me?"

Who still talked like that? He sounded like some British nobleman from the nineteenth century, the three-piece suit just reinforcing that image. Her body's reaction to his handsomeness annoyed her, so she said brusquely, "You can save your charm for a woman who's actually interested."

"Ah, I see," he replied, cocking one eyebrow, the movement making her want to smack him, an insane overreaction she struggled to keep inside. "So you're definitely not interested?"

"No, definitely not," she reiterated firmly, adamant about not letting her body win over her head.

"Using my charms on you would be a total waste of my time, then?"

"Yup." She nodded sharply, taking another pull of her cigarette and blowing the smoke out before she spoke again, "I'm not interested in hooking up with anyone at this wedding. Too much hassle. Either they're total jerks or they want more. Either I'm feeling unsatisfied or guilty for not wanting more."

"Hmmm." He tilted his head slightly to the side, crinkles appearing in the corner of his eyes when he shot her another grin, the sparkling light in his eyes telling her she would probably not like what he said next, "But how're you supposed to find love if you don't even try the goods, so to speak?"

"Love?" she scoffed, shaking her head. "Love just makes you weak."

"That point of view is a little harsh, don't you think, love?"

"You disagree?"

"No. Actually, I don't.

"I won't swear off sex," she told him, cursing herself silently a second later for mentioning it as blatantly as that. But still she couldn't keep herself from saying, "As long as I find a partner who actually knows what he's doing."

"Is that a challenge, Swan?"

She'd just told him only a few moments ago that she wasn't interested in taking him for a ride, but as she looked into his sparkling blue eyes there was a hard tug deep in her stomach. His mouth curled up into a lascivious smirk, one of his eyebrows lifted, and the words were out of her mouth before she could stop them, "Are you up for one, Jones?"

His teeth flashed bright white as his smirk turned into a grin, a grin that sent a shiver through her whole body, starting at the top of her spine and ending in the tips of her toes. Not to mention that her nipples tightened and her core started throbbing with need. She swayed involuntarily forward, letting her gaze drop to his lips for a split second before meeting his eyes again, the intensity in his gaze taking her breath away.

She wanted to kiss him, she wanted to slip her hand into his pants and find out how well built he truly was, she wanted to see his eyes glaze over with desire. She wanted to sample the goods after all. He was just too much of a temptation to withstand.

He stepped forward, closing the gap between them. He lifted one hand to her face, tangling his fingers in her hair and tugged softly, forcing her to tilt her head back, giving him the perfect angle to kiss her. Her eyes fluttered close when he leaned down and she waited for his lips to make contact with hers, every fiber of her vibrating with desperate need and then ...

"Emma? Are you out here somewhere?" Elsa's frantic voice interrupted the moment and her eyes flew open. Killian dropped his hand immediately and stepped back, turning away to hide the obvious bulge in his pants she'd just spotted. Jesus, she wanted to curl her fingers around it and feel the velvety skin against her own, wanted to pump him until he spilled his release all over her hand. Her heart was thumping madly in her chest with unfulfilled lust when Elsa rushed into the small clearing, almost throwing herself at Emma. "Thank God! I'm in desperate need of an emergency cigarette."

"What happened?" Emma asked, trying to get her libido under control to find out what got her friend that riled up.

"This damn Jon… oh, hey Killian. Didn't know you were able to make it after all."

Emma hadn't made the connection before, but when she saw Elsa's face pinking with embarrassment she realized that the man standing by her side must be the little brother of Liam Jones, the best friend of the groom. She'd never met Liam's brother before, obviously. As far as she knew he was in the English Navy, Mary Margaret even telling her once there were rumors he might be a member of MI6, though she definitely didn't believe that. But he did cut quite a figure in his suit, he could clearly pass as a James Bond.

After finding out they were brothers, the resemblance between Liam and him couldn't be denied, the same brilliant blue eyes and facial features. But that's where the resemblance stopped. Liam always seemed to have a stick up his ass. He was nothing like his little brother, who was throwing around his charm as if there were no tomorrow. She'd never felt one tiny spark when she looked at Liam, but with Killian … damn, there was definitely a spark there. A spark that just needed a little air to blow up into a roaring fire and swallow her whole.

Not that she could actually test that theory at the moment, Elsa looked beyond desperate. Apparently Killian noticed it, too, because he excused himself a moment later and sauntered back to the church. She let her gaze linger for a few seconds on his gorgeous ass before she pulled herself back to the crisis at hand.

"What did Liam do this time?" she asked as she gave Elsa a cigarette and the lighter, wondering how the stern Brit always managed to rile her friend up like that.

"Nothing worth mentioning." Elsa lighted the cigarette and waved her off, pulling so hard on it that she inhaled half of the thing in one drag.

"Yeah, right. There's no reason for you to devour your cigarette like that, then?"

"He is just driving me batshit crazy," Elsa said, followed by a heavy sigh and Emma was just about to tell her to get it finally over with when Elsa raised her hand to stop her. "And no, don't give me the whole 'maybe you should jump him to get rid of all the sexual tension' shit. I've told you time and time again there is nothing between us. Absolutely nothing."

Emma wondered when Elsa would stop being this stubborn and just give in to the attraction she felt for one Captain Liam Jones, but it wasn't as if she herself had a stellar record when it came to men and relationships so she kept her mouth shut. She pulled out another cigarette for herself, wondering if she might have to buy another pack if the first hour of this wedding was any indication of how the rest of the day and night might proceed.

-xxx-

Emma couldn't help but smile as she watched Robin swirling Regina around on the dance floor. They were a very handsome couple, and obviously deeply in love with each other. She tried to ignore the slight pang she felt in her heart, following the pair with her eyes as they made their way back to the table where Roland was waiting for them, his face smeared with remnants of the chocolate cake he'd apparently just devoured.

She'd given up on finding true love a long time ago, the scars Neal had left behind probably too deep for her to ever trust anyone again. Most of the time she was fine with her obvious fate as a single woman. But there were times - like right now - when she wished it could be different, feeling a slight twinge of jealousy when she watched other people being ridiculously happy with the love of their lives. Not that she believed in such a thing. Love couldn't last forever. That just wasn't possible.

Turning around with an inward sigh, she reached for her glass of red wine, downing the contents in one swoop before raising her hand to order another one. The barkeeper was on his way towards her when she felt someone step into her personal space, and she was about to turn around and give whoever was standing behind her an earful – she was just in the right mood for a scolding - when the other person spoke.

"So ... all you have to do is pick a partner who knows what he's doing?"

She knew before she turned around who was standing behind her, so close that she actually felt his chest brushing up against her back. It took some effort to refrain from rocking backwards to see if she could spark the same arousal in him that his question had sparked in her. But she resisted the temptation and turned around to him, leaning back against the bar so that she could actually look him in the eyes to see the effect her words would have on him.

"Are you telling me you'd be the right partner to pick?"

He answered her with a dazzling grin and cocked an eyebrow, his eyes sparkling with amusement when he drawled, "Aye, I am."

Maybe it was the two Cosmopolitans she'd just poured on an empty stomach, or maybe it was the fact that she hadn't had sex in forever. Maybe it was the fact that he looked extremely handsome in a three-piece suit, or the fact that his accent did wicked things to her nether regions, or maybe it was the challenging glint in his eyes and the cocky smirk on his face that made her say, "Then let's go."

He didn't miss a beat, his hand coming to rest on the small of her back as they walked out of the ballroom. A few minutes later, the door to a supply closet closed behind them.

Before she could question her decision to have sex with a practical stranger she was swirled around and his lips crashed down on hers, his tongue slipping into her mouth without preamble. Her hands curled around his neck for purchase as he backed her against the opposite wall, devouring her mouth and kissing her senseless.

If the kiss was any indication she was in for a hell of a good time. Her nipples tightened into hard peaks and wetness shot straight between her legs when she felt the evidence of his arousal press into her stomach. The kiss left her slightly dizzy, and she was gulping in air when Killian leaned back, his fingers playing down her neck and cleavage, fluttering over her hard nipple. She let out a soft moan when he slipped his hand between her dress and skin and pushed it down her shoulder, taking the strap of her bra with it until her breast spilled out.

"Gorgeous," he rasped, and then his lips closed around her nipple, sucking it into his mouth, his teeth scraping over it while his tongue flicked back and forth.

Her knees nearly gave out on her when he let her nipple pop out of his mouth, and his eyes were a stormy gray as he looked at her, his hair completely disheveled by her fingers, the look making her walls clench in anticipation.

She wanted to pull him close again, wanted to have another breath-stealing kiss but he took a step back and started to lower himself down on his knees.

"Where do you think you're going?" she asked foolishly since it was blatantly clear what he wanted to do.

"You wanted someone who knows what he's doing, right?" he replied, pushing her dress up slowly until he could reach the waistband of her panties. "Well, I never leave before giving a woman at least two orgasms. I enjoy going down on women, so the first is always from my tongue and fingers and not my dick. Any complaints about that?" His fingers curled around her panties, dragging them down an inch before he stopped and looked up at her. "We can always skip to the main course if you're too impatient to wait, Swan."

"No," she almost whimpered. "No complaints at all."

Her panties were down her legs in the blink of an eye and he lifted first one foot then the other to help her out of them. Shifting closer on his knees, his mouth hovered only inches away from her core and she inhaled a sharp breath when he drew one of her legs over his shoulder and leaned forward, burying his face in her folds.

She actually needed to curl her fingers around the shelf as he started to nip and lick at her. God, he really knew what he was doing. Tender licks through her folds, swirls around her clit and then his tongue penetrated her and fucked her a few times before he went back to her clit. One finger slid into her, and she almost combusted right then and there. Her leg began to shake when he added a second finger, finger-fucking her hard while his mouth worked on her clit. She was spread even wider when he slid three fingers into her and she bit her lip to keep from crying out as the next flick of his tongue over her clit made her careen over the edge. Her walls contracted around his fingers as he kept thrusting them in and out, sliding over her G-spot and pushing her into another climax that was even more devastating than the first.

"Bloody hell," he rasped as he pulled his fingers out of her. "You're so damn responsive."

"Get up here," she breathed, wondering how she was able to stay upright when her whole body was feeling so weak. His arms were probably the only thing keeping her in place and when he let her leg slip from his shoulder she feared for a split second she might actually end up in a heap on the floor.

"As you wish, milady."

Her walls were still quivering with aftershocks as he shoved his pants down and rolled the condom over his admittedly impressive length. Grabbing her legs, he pulled them up until she wrapped them around his waist and a moan escaped her when he shifted her hips forward to get the right angle to slip into her.

He was thick and long, just perfect, stretching her deliciously and she let her eyes fall shut when he started to move, taking her with deep, hard thrusts. Every time he pushed forward he brushed over her sensitive spot, and she could already feel the first flutters of another orgasm sizzle through her body.

His harsh pants were ringing in her ears, the sounds of skin slapping against skin echoing through the small room, the danger of getting caught pushing her towards the edge again faster than she'd thought possible.

His thrusts came more quickly, turning more erratic. He slammed deep into her with one hard thrust, grunting into her ear as he climaxed. The jerks of his cock triggered her own orgasm and she clamped her walls around him, milking him dry as she came and came and came.

She ignored the feeling of loss when he slipped out of her, and she didn't meet his gaze when she bent down to retrieve her panties from the floor. She pulled them over her legs, her walls still fluttering every few seconds, as if her body didn't want her to forget that she'd just experienced the best orgasms of her life.

"All right," she murmured, brushing her dress down over her thighs before she locked eyes with him. "I have to admit, you do know what you're doing." His mouth curled up into a cocky smirk and she knew she needed to leave before this got totally out of hand here. "It was a pleasure, Jones."

She stumbled into Ruby the moment she stepped back into the ballroom. Her friend took one look at her and pulled her into the next corner with a knowing gaze.

"Ooookkkaaaayyy," she drawled, taping her fingers on Emma's arm. "Who was the lucky bastard?"

"Huh?" Emma said, hoping Ruby would drop it. Of course she didn't.

"Or should I ask what guy put that satisfied glow on your face?"

She didn't want to tell Ruby and she probably would have managed to get rid of her without spilling who she'd just fucked with in a supply closet if Killian hadn't stepped into the room just that moment. Her eyes apparently betrayed her and Ruby swiveled around, following her gaze. And of course the son of a bitch shot a lopsided smirk across the room before licking his lips and reminding her where those lips had been just a few minutes ago.

"Oh, you took Killian Jones for a ride?" Ruby squealed, letting out a throaty laugh as she turned her eyes on Emma. "Damn you, girl."

For a second Emma contemplated to deny it, but then she just said, "Yeah, I did."

"Details! I need details!"

"It was great, but it was only a one-time thing."

"Keep telling yourself that, hun," Ruby replied. "Just keep telling yourself that."

She didn't want to argue with Ruby and drag the conversation out even longer. She just shrugged her shoulders and turned around towards the bar. She needed a stiff drink to get her bearings back.

She'd just been fucked in the best way possible, but it wasn't more than that. After all there was a whole ocean between them, and even though her group of friends tried to stay in touch as much as possible, the fact that they were living on different continents made meeting in the flesh a rare occurrence. They mostly met on special occasions like weddings or funerals, and a wedding didn't seem to be in the immediate future. Mary Margaret and Regina were already married with no babies in sight. So no christenings either. Ruby, Elsa, and herself didn't even have a significant other in their lives and she sure hoped they didn't have to meet at a funeral for a very, very long time. She wouldn't stumble over Killian any time soon. It was a fling. It had been very satisfying sex in a closet and nothing else. Some fond memories. After all, fucking in a supply closet had been on her bucket list, so she could check that off now.

It definitely wasn't more than that. Just a checkmark on her bucket list.