Funnie Gets Creamed, by Dickfart
Doug Funnie was undergoing the most improtant dear journaling of his life, but then the door bell rang.
"Hey Borkchop, who could that be?"
Borkchop, not to be confused with Porkchop, said "bork, bork" and followed him down the stairs. He opened the door, and Roger pressed his nose against Doug's nose and said "Funnie, your ass was calling, so I'm gonna cream it."
"Oh gee, Roger. I don't know. Now isn't a very good time to..."
"Oh please, Funnie. Like some loser like YOU has anything better to do. Now bend over."
"Well, all right, Roger, if you're sure," said Doug, dropping trow and exposing the same non-ass that all white people have.
Roger pulled out some Nick Slime that was left over from the 90's and lubed up his man branch. He positioned it over Funnie's sad hole and said, "yodel if you're my bitch, Hoss. Yeehaw!"
"I told you not to call th-OW-Roger! Be gentle. My heinie is delicate."
"I don't hear any yodeling," said Roger, refusing to thrust and fuck until Doug started to yodel and beat box for him. He sheathed and shealthed and shealthed his fat horse cock into Dougie's frowning hole, the head of his dick fisting Doug's prostate with a vengeance. He tore that ass as he fucked it, blood coating his dick and balls.
"Oh no, what would Quailman do?" said Doug. He drew his Quailman comic with his ass blood and shit, and Roger laughed at him.
"Oh brother, Funnie. Aren't you ever gonna stop drawing self-gratifying pictures of yourself wearing your mom's underwear on your head?"
"Joke's on you. That's... my under... wear..." said Doug, as he bleed to death from his ass and died.
"Hiya Doug, honk honk," said Skeeter, watching Roger fuck Doug's corpse.
"Funnie says he's too busy being my cum dumpster to hang out with you, Valentine," said Roger.
"Oh, OK. But when he's done, I have two tickets to the Beets reunion concert. Take it easy Roger, honk honk."
"Oh don't worry, I will, huhaw, huhawhahahaha!"
And he fucked Doug's corpse until the blood, shit, and cum dried around his cock, leaving Doug's dead body glued permanently to Roger's cock. It was everything Roger ever hoped and dreamed in his mission to cream Funnie.
The End