slurp-slurp-SLURP-SLURP-slurp-slurp-slurp-SLURP…
Tenzin sighed heavily and stared forlornly at the ceiling. The first rays of the new morning were just trickling through the bedroom window. Pema lay beside him, soft and warm and sleeping peacefully. The children (for a change) were all sleeping in their own beds. And Kuruk was busy licking himself. Loudly. Thoroughly.
"How can anyone sleep with that racket…" Tenzin muttered. It was bad enough that the dog insisted on sleeping in here—with Pema's indulgent approval, no less—but the beast insisted on cleaning himself at every available opportunity. How Pema could just drift off like she did was beyond him. Tenzin had tried every meditation technique he could think of and invented a few new ones, but nothing could overcome that awful noise.
Sighing again, Tenzin slowly extricated himself from the covers and sat up. "Hmmm?" Pema murmured, unhappy that her Primary Heat Source had abruptly vanished.
"It's all right, dear," he said quietly. "I'm just getting an early start on the day." He leaned over and kissed her on the cheek.
"Mmmkay," she smiled. "Take Kuruk out, would you? He probably has to potty."
"All right." Tenzin moved to the foot of the bed and stared at the huge polar bear dog. Kuruk finished his morning ablutions and glanced up at him, licking his lips for an encore. "Come on," he grumbled. "Outside."
The dog refused to budge. "Outside, Kuruk." Nothing. No matter how commanding Tenzin tried to appear or sound, no matter how many times Pema pointed at her husband and said 'Master', Kuruk adamantly refused to obey Tenzin's slightest order. Korra had warned them that the dogs tended to bond with one person; it was pretty obvious whom Kuruk had chosen.
"I don't have time for this nonsense." Tenzin shot a sharp burst of air directly underneath Kuruk, making the dog jump in surprise. He shot Tenzin a glare as he reluctantly rose to his feet and stretched. "Outside," Tenzin ordered, and with deliberate casualness the dog ambled out of the bedroom.
"I never had this much trouble with Korra," Tenzin muttered as he followed.
Kuruk's mother had been adamant about the importance of hygiene. It was important to be clean and to stay clean for Mistress. Grooming was a top priority. Kuruk was surprised, however, that Mother had never mentioned how tasty grooming could be.
He heard the bald guy sighing and grumbling but kept working on his morning chore. Kuruk never could quite understand why Mistress kept the guy around; he was always grumpy and had made it very clear that he didn't like Kuruk. Well, the feeling was mutual; Kuruk always kept an eye on the man to make sure nothing bad happened to Mistress. The bald guy could not be trusted.
And now the man was standing beside him, pointing at the door and saying something in that nasty tone of voice. Mistress, however, was still in here, and it was Kuruk's duty to make sure that Mistress was safe and happy. The bald guy would just have to deal with it.
A sudden blast of cold air from underneath made Kuruk jump and land on his feet, and from the smug look on his face the bald guy had had something to do with it. He pointed at the door again and Kuruk reluctantly decided to obey. If nothing else, it was potty time, and that meant breakfast would be next, and breakfast tasted almost as good as hygiene!
Kuruk was going to have to keep an eye on the bald guy, though. Just in case.
Though for the life of him he didn't understand why, Tenzin followed Kuruk to one particular section of the island. For whatever reason the dog had long ago decided that this would be The Spot, and his many visits had rendered the usually-lush green grass to a pale sickly yellow…what little grass still remained. The acolytes had a motto about it: "Nothing Grows Where Kuruk Goes".
"All right," he informed the dog. "I'm heading over to the meditation pavilion. You go do…whatever it is you do." Tenzin felt vaguely stupid for saying it; it wasn't as though the dog understood anything beyond "food", "Mistress", "food", "good boy" and of course "food". Pema had once pointed out that he had no problem talking to Oogi that way and that had led to a rather heated debate about the merits and intelligence of polar bear dogs and sky bison. Tenzin had learned to avoid those kinds of debates. They invariably led to cold meals and colder beds.
Kuruk for his part bounded back to the courtyard, where the acolyte Ryoko was waiting with his bucket of breakfast. "All right, all right," she said, trying desperately to avoid the wildly-wagging tail. "Let me get your bowl—stay out of the bucket, you oversized idiot! Damn it, Kuruk, you're going to get it stuck on your head…again…" Kuruk paid no heed as he plunged joyfully into the fishy contents of the container. He greedily devoured every last scrap, then attempted to pull out only to find his head and snout firmly wedged inside. He barked uncertainly and tried to shaking it off, to no avail.
"You know, someday I'll remember to get the bowl out first," Ryoko grumbled as she made the beast hold still long enough to get a grip on the bucket. "Or maybe I'll just let you spend the day like this." Several fierce tugs later Kuruk managed to pull free, shaking his head happily in relief.
Ryoko sighed and set the bucket down. "I'm going to get breakfast ready for the boss and kids…no! Wait! Kuruk, there isn't anything in the…oh, damn it, not again!"
The bald guy had insisted on following Kuruk to The Spot. He wasn't sure why, though he harbored a suspicion that the man was trying to claim it for himself. As if. Kuruk took his sweet time getting his business out of the way, making sure that every possible inch of The Spot was covered. No one was taking HIS territory away, not if he had anything to say about it.
The smell of fresh fish caught his attention, and Kuruk hurried over to the Big House where Mistress lived. The pretty firebender was bringing his breakfast up the stairs. Kuruk liked the firebender; she made all sorts of grumpy noises but every so often she'd give him a big hug or rub his belly with those nice warm hands of hers. Besides, Mistress liked her a lot, and as far as he was concerned any friend of Mistress was a friend of Kuruk-bald guy excepted, of course.
Kuruk loved breakfast; it was his favorite meal next to lunch, dinner and the occasional snack. He plunged his snout deeper and deeper into the metal box thing, greedily gobbling every last scrap down. He was confused though, because even though his tongue could not find any more scraps, his nose was certain there had to be some more in there somewhere. Kuruk pushed his snout further in until he suddenly found that he couldn't get the box off.
Fortunately the pretty firebender was always there to get the box off. It was one of Kuruk's favorite games.
"Good morning, Xiang." Pema smiled at the elderly proprietor. "How are you this morning?"
"I'm doing well," the old man replied brightly. "And how are you? Hello, Kuruk." He tossed the hulking dog a large fish head, which was accepted and devoured in instants.
"You're spoiling him," Pema laughed.
"Maybe, but I don't want to find out what happens the day I don't have something for him. What can I get you today, Mistress Pema?" As she went over the shopping list with Xiang, his assistant quickly gathered up the items and loaded them into the large saddlebags strapped on either side of Kuruk. The bags were Asami's idea—they were securely fastened and remarkably easy to slip on and off.
Sango's three children squealed at the sight of Kuruk as Pema went over her list with the rice merchant. To his credit the dog stayed in "lie down" position and waited patiently as the boys and girls climbed all over him. The children were allowed to present him with another fish scrap at the end of the visit.
It continued this way up and down the market. Pema and Kuruk were always a welcome presence so far as the merchants were concerned. Mistress Pema was the kindest, sweetest woman to be found anywhere, and to be honest Kuruk was the best crime deterrent around. No one was insane enough to cause trouble when he was around.
Plus, they no longer had a problem with old fish scraps lying around and stinking up the place.
Kuruk loved going with Mistress to the city. He loved all the interesting smells and all the nice people who smiled and patted him and most importantly gave him snacks. Kuruk was after all a growing boy.
He loved his harness and saddle too, though Mistress never really rode atop him like Mama's Mistress did. That was all right, though. Kuruk was happy to follow behind and carry Mistress' things for her, and more importantly keep Mistress safe.
Mmmm. Fish heads.
"…got some very good deals on the rice and mushrooms," Pema said to Ryoko. "I think they really like having Kuruk around. Lin mentioned the other day that things have really quieted down in the market." She shifted the collection of greenhouse vegetables in her arms. "I mean, it might be due to something else, but I like to think he's got something to do with it…"
"Hey Mom," Ikki called, gliding over on an air ball. "Did you get Kuruk a new chew toy today?"
Pema blinked in surprise. "Why, no honey," she said. "What made you think that?"
"Well, he's gnawing on some sort of long thing with a blue arrow on it, and it's making this really odd buzzing sound…" Pema gasped and hurried toward the courtyard, a puzzled Ikki and highly amused Ryoko following close behind.
"KURUK!" The polar bear dog briefly glanced up at his mistress before returning to his new toy. "KURUK, YOU DROP THAT RIGHT NOW! BAD DOG! BAD!" Pema dropped her burden and lunged for the well-gnawed item. "GIVE ME THAT!"
"Hey! That looks just like a…" Ikki began, but her mother's fierce glare shut her up.
"Oh no," Pema groaned, shaking her head. "I must have forgotten to put it away earlier…"
"Mom!" Ikki demanded, undaunted. "Why does that look just like a…"
"Ikki," Pema said in a low, no-nonsense voice. "Go meditate. Now."
"But I already did that today and I want to know why that thing is buzzing and why it looks just like a…"
"IKKI. NOW." The young airbender gulped and left as quickly as her air ball would take her. Pema regarded the battered remains and sighed sadly. "It's ruined…it was a present from Asami…"
"I wish I had friends like that," Ryoko smirked.
Kuruk didn't understand why Mistress was so angry. After all, he'd found the toy lying on the bedroom floor, so that had to mean it was meant for him. And it wasn't like Mistress hadn't given him things to chew before—what was the big deal with this?
Of course, the other toys hadn't buzzed and shuddered like this one, but Kuruk had figured that this was a special present for being such a good boy at the market. Obviously he was wrong.
Kuruk lowered his head in shame and whimpered to himself. The bald guy had had something to do with this, he was sure.
Asami looked down at the destroyed 'object' and shook her head. "I'm afraid this one's beyond repair," she informed Pema. "But don't worry. I can make you a new one in a day or two."
"I'm so sorry," Pema sighed. "I got rushed this morning and forgot to put it away, and I guess Kuruk got hold of it. I'll be more careful in the future, I promise."
"Don't worry about it," Asami assured her. She tucked the object in her sidebag. "Let's go see how Korra's managing the 'bonding with Tenzin' training."
"I've tried and tried to get Kuruk to acknowledge Tenzin as master," said Pema. "But he gives me this blank look and ignores him. If he and Tenzin could just learn to get along, I think things would be so much easier…"
Korra and Tenzin stood to Kuruk's right. "Okay," she declared. "Polar bear dogs love to play—well, Naga does at least. It's a great way to bond and get the dog some exercise in the process. What I like to do with Naga is this…" She tossed a large beanbag into the air, then hit it with a hard burst of air that sent it flying across the island. Naga barked excitedly and set off in pursuit, returning a few minutes later with the bag securely between her teeth.
"Good girl," Korra praised. She gave Naga a small treat. "It's also important to give the dog a reward. It's incentive for good behavior. Now you try it, Tenzin."
"All right…" Tenzin grimaced and tentatively picked up the now-soggy beanbag with two fingers. "Kuruk, go get it!" he ordered, sending the bag flying much as Korra had done. The dog remained where he was, staring curiously at him. "Go get it, Kuruk!"
Kuruk's response was to lie down and start licking himself. "You see what I mean?" Tenzin snapped at Korra. "That dog doesn't like me, he never has, and he never will!"
"You need to calm down," Korra replied. "Remember, be calm but firm. Watch me…Kuruk…fetch! Fetch! Fetch…oh, for crying out loud. Naga, fetch, will you?" Her dog snorted but trotted in the direction of the bag's arc. "Sheesh, how soon they forget…"
"They grow up so quickly," Asami smirked.
"Shut up," Korra retorted. "Okay, let's try this." She accepted the soggy beanbag from Naga. "Tenzin, you shoot this into the air, but this time Pema will tell him to fetch."
"I suppose it's worth a try," Pema said uncertainly.
Tenzin muttered something under his breath and blasted the beanbag high into the air. "Kuruk, FETCH!" Pema ordered, and this time the dog hastened to obey. Unfortunately Tenzin's second shot struck the bag at a different angle and sent it flying further than normal…off the edge of the island, to be precise. This made no difference to Kuruk, who launched himself high into the air in hot pursuit. His arc took him over the cliff as well.
"Oh crap," Korra gasped.
"KURUK!" Pema cried out. She whirled toward Tenzin. "HOW COULD YOU?"
"IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!"
"YOU'VE ALWAYS HATED HIM! YOU NEVER WANTED ME TO HAVE HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE! AND NOW YOU…"
Asami in the meantime had hurried over to the edge of the cliff and was peering down. "I've got good news and bad news," she called out to the others, who immediately joined her. She pointed out toward the bay. "His momentum made him land out in the bay, but…"
"Where the devil is he going?" Tenzin declared. "He's swimming away from the island!"
"Pema, call him as loud as you can," Korra urged. "You're the only one he'll listen to."
"KURRRRRRRUKKKK!" The dog's head turned in the sound of her voice, and a moment later Kuruk was making his way back to the island. "Oh, thank goodness," Pema sighed. "Tenzin, I…I shouldn't have said those things. I panicked. I'm so sorry."
"I think we're done with this," Tenzin replied curtly.
"Yeah," Korra nodded. "Next time…" She looked up and flinched in the wake of Tenzin's stare. "Never mind," she quickly corrected.
Kuruk trotted up the steps to where Mistress was waiting. He carried the prize in his mouth; wouldn't she be so surprised? And the water had been so cool and refreshing!
He decided to shake himself dry next to the bald guy. That would be fun.
"You know, Tenzin, I'm really sorry about this afternoon," Pema said softly as they prepared for bed. "I was out of line and disrespectful to you, and in front of Korra and Asami no less."
"It's all right," he muttered as he pulled off his shoes. "It was the heat of the moment. I hope you really don't believe any of that. I would never wish harm on a living animal." No matter how stupid, he added silently. I thought Pokey was bad…
"No, it's not all right," Pema declared. "I have been a terrible acolyte. I've failed to show proper respect to the Master." She let her robes slide to the floor and stepped out of them. "I should be disciplined for my actions," she half-pleaded, half-purred.
"Oh…really?" Tenzin's expression changed dramatically at the sight of his naked wife. "I see," he continued, jettisoning his own clothing in record time, "Then I must administer a proper punishment and make sure you don't disrespect me again!" He pulled her to him and wrestled her onto the bed.
"Oooo!" Pema squealed. Tenzin had always been an enthusiastic role-player; one of his favorite bits was the "naughty acolyte who'd forgotten yet again to wear panties", but this one was just as good. She yelped with delight as he pinned her down and nipped at her throat, her shoulders, and a few other places as nature took its course…oh, he was REALLY getting into things, spirits!...
…and then all of a sudden he was gone. "Honey?" Pema said, puzzled. She propped herself up on her elbows and looked around. "Tenzin, where are you…?"
"Pema…" Her husband was lying on the floor, securely pinned and looking up at an extremely angry polar bear dog. Kuruk's teeth were bared and the growl rumbling from his throat made his feelings quite clear. "Pema," Tenzin said weakly, unable to look away from those teeth. "Would you mind…?"
"Oh. OH! Kuruk, let him go this minute!"
Kuruk declined, instead lowering his mouth ever closer to Tenzin's throat.
"BAD BOY!" Pema shouted. "KURUK—LIE DOWN! BAD BOY!" The dog spared her a confused glance before returning his attention to his captive. "KURUK, DON'T MAKE ME USE THE NEWSPAPER! LIE DOWN! BAD BOY!" Kuruk reluctantly complied, glancing back at Pema and whimpering under the force of her steel glare.
"Are you all right?" Pema asked Tenzin.
"I…I think so," he gasped. "As soon as my heart slows down, at any rate. He…must have thought I was hurting you and pulled me away by the ankle."
"I don't think you're bleeding," Pema said. She turned toward Kuruk. "Bad boy! You tried to hurt Master! She rose to her feet and loomed over the dog in all her naked glory. "Outside, mister!" she declared, pointing toward the bedroom door. "You're sleeping outside tonight! Shame!"
Kuruk was confused. The bald guy was clearly hurting Mistress. He heard her crying out and saw him pinning her down. Kuruk wasn't sure what was going on but he knew he'd been right all along—the bald guy was NOT to be trusted. It was time to take action!
But when Kuruk had dealt with the situation, Mistress had yelled at him and told him to leave the bald guy alone! She used that funny word that Kuruk never quite understood…'mas-something'. And then she banished him from the bedroom! How could Kuruk protect Mistress from outside…the cold, dark and lonely outside? What had he done to be brought to this lowly state?
There was only one thing to be done. Kuruk raised his head to the heavens and sang the mournful 'bad dog' song of his people.
"Ohhh, get in here," Pema snapped a few minutes later, glaring at Kuruk as he slunk back into the bedroom. "I swear, you do that deliberately. They could probably hear you in Ba Sing Se!"
"Could we please go to sleep?" a now-dressed Tenzin pleaded. "It's been a long day."
"You're right, honey. I'm sorry about everything." Pema snuggled up to him and kissed his cheek. "Good night."
"Good night." Tenzin sighed and closed his eyes. It had been quite a day, but he was sure with a good night's sleep tomorrow would be much, much better.
slurp-slurp-SLURP-SLURP-slurp-slurp-slurp-SLURP…
Or not.