AN: Wrote this a very long time ago. Dedicated to Kbuster. Harry's POV.

I've never really been afraid of Voldemort.

See, Voldemort is totally evil. He cares for nothing and no one. It's all just wanton killing and lust for power.

And that kind of thing is easy to fit into a neat and tidy world view. There is evil in the world; we all know this. There is good and there is evil; the yin and yang, the balance of the universe. And Voldemort is obviously on the evil side, purely and completely.

So that isn't really very scary. What's scary is when good and evil mix together so you can't tell which is which. What's scary is when 'normal' people- not murderers or psychos, but ordinary people, who live and work and love - radiate evil and hatred.

My aunt, uncle and cousin, they scare me. I mean, they love each other, right? They have feelings. So there must be some good in them. But at the same time, they felt hatred for an innocent baby that couldn't help who his parents were. They chose to take their own flesh and blood and lock him in a closet and starve him. How does that make sense? How do you fit that into your neat and tidy world view?

I first realized that I was in love with Hermione when I saw her all dressed up at the Yule ball that day. But I think I'd actually fallen in love with her long before that. But that kind of thing is hard to admit to yourself, you know?

I mean, it's much easier to crush on someone like Cho. She's cute, but I don't really know her; I'm not close to her, so there's no emotional involvement there. No real risk of losing anything.

But Hermione...I could lose everything.

Ron and Hermione were some of the first people in my life to ever show me kindness or affection. They are my best friends. And what if they went away? What would I have then?

They're both good people, I know they are, and I know they love me. And I want to believe that they won't ever go away.

But see, there's that evil in the world. The scary kind, I mean, the kind that mixes up with good so you can't tell which is which. That hatred that can come from normal, loving people. I mean, if something like that can and does exist, then maybe there is no real love in the world. Maybe everyone just goes away in the end.

So I have learned that the good things in the world, like love and kindness and affection, are fragile. They're like a glass vase that can shatter into a million pieces if you bump it the wrong way.

And Hermione finding out how I feel about her might just be that bump.

I mean, what if she doesn't like me back, and then everything gets all awkward between us and she doesn't want to be friends with me anymore? And what about Ron? I can tell that he has a crush on her. He'd hate me if he knew how I felt.

And I really don't know what I'd do if I lost them as friends. They're...all I have.

So I don't think I'm ever going to let her know how I feel. Even though I want to die every time I'm near her because I need her so badly, I'm never going let her know.

I can't go back to being alone in the world.