So I wrote something, and it WASN'T PORN! How strange is that?
This totally came out of a discussion on the Megamind LJ community where I said Wayne was so totally gay. And even though I'm in the middle of two other stories and the busiest week of the year at work (curse you Summer Reading Program!), I still banged this out in less then a week because I couldn't put it out of my brain. So I hope peoples don't think it sucks. *fingers crossed*
Title: Fortress of Solitude
Author : Dani Kin
Rating: T/PG-13. I apparently can't write without swearing and this story has teh gay in it. *omg*
Summary : Wayne is having visitors at his fortress of solitude. This is not good.
Characters: Wayne and Megamind/Roxanne
Notes: The bad sci-fi movies I mentioned in this story are totally real and truly terrible. They are best watched never but if you have to see them, I advise lots of booze and good friends to help MST3K.
Wayne paced around the sectional nervously. He never had people over to his fortress of solitude. Hence the name. If had any interest in entertaining he would have kept on living in one of the opulent Scott family homes scattered across the globe. No, this place he had built himself. Ok so he had used his family money to buy the land and hire the construction crews, but had designed it himself. He needed something below ground so he could finally tune out the endless chitterchat of the city above. It was exhausting always having to hear everything. No, this was his place. And now that Metro Man was dead, he never needed to feel pressured to constantly rush off and save someone. He left to get groceries or guitar strings or to visit his mom. That was it. He could get on with the business of being Wayne Scott, whoever the fuck that was.
He had always taken care to keep Metro Man and Wayne Scott completely separate. Wayne Scott was a rich kid who grew up to run a consulting firm, though what kind of consulting he provided was intentionally vague. He showed up in the society pages on occasion at his mother's charity functions and otherwise kept his head down. Metro Man was a superhero who came to this planet from a distant world as a baby to promote justice or something. Yes, Megamind knew his secret identity, but that was because they were kids together. And Roxanne knew because she wasn't stupid and they had been friends. He was pretty sure his mom had figured it out, but she was a true blue blood and didn't talk about upsetting things with people to their face. But that was pretty much it. With Metro Man 'dead', he could get away from all this crazy hero and villain lifestyle and do the things that he wanted to do.
But now they were coming here and it was most definitely not what Wayne wanted. It was bad enough last time when they had just showed up and caught him looking like a disheveled homeless man in his robe. But this time Roxanne had called his cell and like an idiot he answered it. She told him that they needed to talk and that she was bringing Megamind for a 'very important discussion'. And he wasn't a moron, he knew what they wanted to talk about.
He had watched the news last week as that idiot Hal had rampaged through the streets. He had waffled back and forth about getting involved when he suddenly saw himself on the TV. It turned out to be another one of Megamind's tricks, but seeing it on screen had freaked him out, like seeing a ghost. And Megs had handled that guy like a pro in the end so it was just as well that he had stayed home and sat on his ass.
But Wayne knew Roxanne and she was going to be pissed. She might throw more speakers at him. It didn't hurt physically but he hated the guilt. Because she was right and he probably should have done something better in that situation then just warm the couch. Now she was on her way here to yell at him again. In fact, he was pretty sure he heard a familiar crunch of gravel as a car parked above ground. It was followed by two pairs of footsteps and though he was down too deep to understand what they were saying, he could clearly identify their voices.
They were here. So he was pretty much stuck and this was going to happen. He sighed. Maybe he should have bought some refreshments. What do you serve your former nemesis and former beard when they stopped by? He knew that Roxanne would love a lemonade or an ice tea but he had no idea what Megamind liked to drink. In all their years of banter and battle the subject just never came up. And it was moot because the only beverages he had were three warm cans of Pabst, a unmade packet of grape Kool Aid, and water from the tap. So no, there was no point in offering. Best to just get this done and over with as soon as possible. He could hear them in the hallway.
"…. And I'm simply not comfortable with social calls. Particularly social calls with my former nemesis. I don't know what to say," Megamind huffed back at her.
"You'll be just fine," Roxanne was saying. "Looks like we're here." And they stopped behind the door. "Should we knock?"
One of them began knocking on the metal door and he soon heard Roxanne's voice calling "Hello? Wayne?"
He sighed. Best get this over with. He walked slowly, even for him, to the door. He screwed a polite but neutral look on his face and open the door to see the former damsel and the former villain standing there. "Hi," he said somewhat awkwardly. "Come on in".
"Hello Wayne", Roxanne said with a smile and she walked in. "Thanks for having us over on such short notice". He noticed Megamind was still standing in the hall, looking around as though he would need to plan a route for a sudden escape. The two men stared at each other for a moment and then he walked into the large living room to stand next to Roxanne. From their proximity it was clear to Wayne the tabloid reports claiming they were dating were at least somewhat based in truth. Well that was going to make this even weirder. He stared at them and they stared at him. Roxanne elbowed Megamind and he squeaked out a stilted hello. Oh this was going to be a special kind of hell.
"Why don't you two sit down and we can get to what brings you here today?" he asked, leading them to the sectional, wanting this over as soon as possible. They looked at each other and then sat down. From the way Megamind was looking at Roxanne it was clear that he was expecting her to take some kind of lead here. Which was strange in and of itself because he had expected Megamind to gloat or have something self-aggrandizing to say. It was downright unsettling to see him look so nervous. Roxanne turned to look at him and he felt the burn of her nosey reporter stare. And it burned. Oh it burned.
"Wayne, I don't know how much attention you had paid to current events since the last time we were here. Did you see what went down last week?" she asked him bluntly. He took a deep breath and answered honestly.
"I did. And I wanted to say that you did a fine job handling that Titan or Tighten fool without my help". Hmmm, that sounded more defensive out loud then it did in his head. For the first time Megamind looked straight at him, as though he was studying him.
"Good" Roxanne replied curtly. "Then I don't need to waste time explaining the situation we find ourselves in. Let's break down moving forward. We need something from you. We need you to be not dead. Specifically we need you to tell everyone you faked your own death." His eyes widened and his jaw dropped. This was what not what he anticipated. Being called a coward and having stuff chucked at his head, sure, he was ready for that. Being asked to publically expose himself like this was out of the question. She had to have been able to read that on his face, and she continued.
"The governor's office is willing to issue a full pardon to Megamind for the years of property destruction, theft, and assault. But they can't forgive a very public murder rap of Metro City's favorite son. Everyone saw that skeleton that you hurled at us and thinks it was really you," She paused and looked at him with that analytical look she usually saved for difficult interview subjects. "Can you help us?"
"No. Wait, make that a hell no," he responded angrily and stood up. He turned away from them to face his wall of guitars. "I can't do that Roxie. I'm done. I can't go back to that life again".
"Wayne no one is asking you to be Metro Man again –" she started.
"Bullshit. This is how it starts up again!" he turned back to face her. "I come forward and even if they think I'm completely nuts, that whole game starts again. Every bank robbery, every hostage situation, every dumbass supervillian wannabee and I'm going to have to hear them screaming for me all-day, all-the-time again. They're just going to keep needing help and who the hell else is going to do it?" he buried his face into his left hand. Not good, not good, not good.
"Me" Megamind spoke softly for the first time in this conversation. Wayne reared his head back in shock and looked at the small blue alien. Megamind was staring at his own hands but he lifted his head up and looked Wayne in the eye. Wayne continued to stare; slack-jawed at the former supervillian. "I want to try at least. I think I could be…." Megamind sighed as though he was collecting his thoughts. "I think I would be good at being a hero," he finally stated simply.
Wayne simply couldn't stop staring. Egomaniacal ranting evil Megamind he could handle. Heroic, quiet, and thoughtful Megamind was throwing him completely off course.
"Say something Wayne. Please. We need you on board with this," Roxanne pleaded. He looked at her and then back to Megamind.
"Give me a minute," he answered softly as he went back to rubbing his temples and the long silence stretched before them. This afternoon was turning out so much worse than he ever thought it was going to be.
"I told you he would never help me," Megamind muttered under his breath.
"Look if we can't figure this out between the three of us then there is going to be a trial," Roxanne said with exasperation. "And you bet your ass we're going to come forward and say you're not dead. There will be wild speculation and no guarantee that they will find Megamind innocent of the one crime he didn't actually commit". Megamind was looking down at his hands again. Wayne sighed as she laid it all out bare.
"And I'm not going to let you do that to him. I'll tear the lid off all your secrets on live TV if I have to. I know where all the bodies are buried," she said with a protective tone in her voice. He looked up at her and she was completely fierce. He had seen her go into battle like this before, with station editors, shady businessmen, and corrupt politicians. That she would launch herself in like this for Megamind of all people left him nearly speechless. That, and it was frankly terrifying to be on the receiving end of that ire. He sighed again.
"You buried bodies?" Megamind interjected, with a look on his face that was somehow both disgust and admiration.
"It's just a figure of speech sweetie. It means that I know unpleasant secrets about him," Roxanne explained to Megamind and he nodded. Wayne noted the sweetie in there. How does one go from kidnapper to sweetie in less than a week? What. The. Fuck.
"Ok. Ok okay." He waved his hand in front of his face as he collected his thoughts and sat down. "Is there any way we can get the murder charge to go away without having to put me out in public? Maybe I can just go talk to the mayor or something." He pleaded.
"Not going to work. Even if we can work out some back room deal, people will still think he killed you. He'll be eaten alive in the court of public opinion" Roxanne countered.
"Well maybe he should have thought of that before he went on a decade-long crime spree." he replied defensively. "I quit and I want to stay quit. I was just trying to be free for the first time in my life".
"No you were being selfish. You were so excited to have your own freedom that you didn't think of what the consequences would be for Megamind, " she retorted harshly. That actually stung. You know, because she was right. He scowled at her.
"He was going to be Evil freakin' Overlord! I wasn't worried about him. I've known your new boyfriend longer then you and he always lands on his feet." He said with vitriol and crossed his arms across his chest. "Plus what is the big deal about him getting charged with murder? " he turned to look at Megamind again "If you want out of there it will take you less than an hour."
"I don't want to do that anymore" Megamind said simply. Wayne looked at him and sighed again. Megamind continued. "I want to be able to take a walk in the park with Roxanne or sit in a restaurant without running. I want to go out and protect the city without having to run from the cops when I turn in the bad guys. I want my own life. I would think you would get that." Megamind looked straight at him and Wayne could feel the accusation hanging in the air.
He did get that. He got that a lot. Well fuck. Fuck him. He looked at both of them. Roxanne looked like she wanted to dangle him over a bear pit if it would help the cause and Megamind was doing that unsettling calm thing again, staring directly at him. When did things get so fucking complicated? Yesterday his biggest problems were a broken guitar string and a passive aggressive voicemail from his mother. He leaned back into the sectional and spread his arms out.
"What would I even say? What would I do?" he asked weakly. "I don't want all those people staring at me with that disappointed look in their eyes. I can't take that. I'll do it if there is a way to make it private but I won't drag myself up in front of the whole city." Roxanne looked like she was about to respond to that but Megamind spoke up and beat her to it.
"People would need to see you with their own two eyes. They're not going to believe it unless they can see it." Megamind explained as thought he was some kind of idiotic child. Wayne rolled his eyes at the ceiling.
"I know you're going to hate this, but we're thinking of a press conference" Roxanne said, a touch of compassion making its way back into her voice. He felt the pinprick of frustrated tears at the corners of his eyes just thinking about it. He quickly squeezed his eyes shut. He couldn't do this. He just couldn't. He couldn't bear for them to look at him like that. Like he was a failure or defective or worse yet with pity.
"I wanted Metro Man to go out with a bang" he said softly. "I didn't want people to remember him as a total…. loser weirdo freak hot-mess", his confessional tone clear. "What would I say to them? That I cracked under the pressure and decided to fake my own death in a spectacularly bizarre fashion that ultimately turned the city over to its biggest villain while crossing my fingers that it would just all turn out fine?"
"Well that is pretty much what happened," Roxanne said, focusing her eyes at him as though she was the one with laser vision. "We could feed them the usual lines celebrities use about seeking psychological help and asking for privacy during these difficult times." Wayne continued to keep his eyes squeezed shut. This is exactly what he didn't want, why he didn't have a big retirement announcement. He wanted to be anonymous, fade into the crowd, where he could do things that he had always wanted without judgment. This would put a big blinking target on him.
"What if they hate me?" he asked. "I've never had anyone hate me before." He looked right at Megamind when he said that. He knew the blue alien could remember their old school days together clearly, back when life had been simple and he could impress a gaggle of school children with popcorn or saving someone from a dodgeball. He also remembered making an example out of the weird blue kid a lot, constantly tattling on him, because it made everyone like him even more. Once he had Megamind in his sights, the other children had turned on him too. Though to be honest, Megamind wasn't helped by his appalling lack of social skills that even a second grader found off-putting. No wonder he snapped and set off a paint bomb.
"It's not easy to have people hate you," Megamind said caustically. "But they won't hate you the way they hated me."
"No, they're gonna hate me more. They put me up on a pedestal and now I've fallen off it. They're gonna hate me for letting them down and then pity me for being a pathetic freak." He could feel the frustration within himself rising and he started pacing. "And that's going to open up all these questions. People are going to start crawling all over my life, picking through all my past strategies and decisions, looking for weaknesses. They're gonna start looking for all my secrets. They're going to interview my friends and paparazzi are going to stalk my family. My mother is going to have a coronary and even if I can write some songs that don't suck, I'm never going to get a chance to play them for anyone but the couch because no one is going to take me seriously as Wayne Scott musician. They're just going to see Wayne Scott, hey look at the ex-superhero weirdo gay fuck up!"
It took a second to realize that had just left his mouth. Roxanne, for her part, didn't look surprised at all. Megamind however cocked his head as though he had no idea what to do with this new information. Fuck. Fuck fuck. He had managed to keep it a secret from them for a decade and now it was all undone in one angry rant. This was why he should never have people over. He wished he had offered them the warm beer. Then he could have pretended they were just drunk and misheard him. Could humans get drunk off one can of PBR? Was it too late to get the beer? The silence was getting beyond awkward. He stood up, intending to tell them to get the hell out of his house and start looking for a new fortress location. But his thoughts were interrupted by Roxanne. She was making a noise. And he swore it was a giggle. Then the giggle turned into a full throated belly laugh.
"I knew it!" she wheezed between breaths. "That's why you wanted everyone to think we were dating! You gave me that load of shit about how you could focus better without all those women throwing themselves at you and then tried to convince me it would be good for my career!" She was laughing so hard that he could tell she was struggling to stay on the couch.
"Well I'm glad my pain amuses you" he said bitterly. He didn't really know what else to say. Megamind was looking between Wayne and Roxanne like he didn't know which of them was crazier. Her laughter died off and she stood up and crossed the room to stand right in front of him.
"Wayne Scott, you have been my friend for a long time and through some truly crazy shit. Every time Megamind kidnapped me, I knew you would have my back. Plus you were the best fake boyfriend I've ever had. You sat through every boring work function with me, you flew me to Tampa for my dad's funeral when I couldn't get a last minute flight, and I can't count how many Friday nights we wasted making fun of bad movies on the Syfi channel. Did you really think that I would care if you were gay?"
"I don't know" he mumbled, not looking at her. He really didn't. He had assumed he was going to take his secret to the grave so hadn't given it much thought. Metro Man had an image to uphold and being a homosexual was not part of truth, justice, and the American way.
"I love you like a brother Wayne, but you are an idiot" she shook her head at him and wrapped him up in a big hug. "I always knew you were melodramatic but faking your own death was nuts. You should have talked to me. " That was when he lost it and a few tears of relief ran down his face as he hugged her back. They separated and he ran his left hand across the back of his neck nervously.
"This makes no sense to me," Megamind interrupted, still clearly boggled. "You two beautiful normal people used to hang out on Friday nights and watch bad sci-fi movies?" Wayne stifled a little laugh. That was the part he was stuck on?
"Yeah. They used to have these bizarre made-for-TV things that were usually about dinosaurs showing up in unexpected places like a Mexican jungle or the center of the sun. They were terrible". Roxanne explained.
"I know," Megamind confirmed, shaking his head in amazement. "Minion and I used to watch them all the time and rant at the television. You were talking about Aztec Rex right? The CGI on those dinosaurs was terrible and the film contained numerous scientific inaccuracies. There is no way a Tyrannosaurus Rex could be alive in a pre-Columbian Aztec jungle." He scoffed. Wayne shook his head in surprise and stared at his former enemy.
"I know right?" Roxanne chuckled at the memory. "Did you see the one with the pterodactyls in World War II?" she asked Megamind. He shook his head. "We HAVE to see if we can get that one on DVD!" she said excitedly. "Can you imagine the four of us, plenty of margaritas, and dinosaurs chasing Nazi planes?" Wayne could see her practically beaming. And honestly, that didn't sound like a bad evening. Even if the idea of hanging out with Megamind was really weird. He had to admit that he always thought he got Megamind, he didn't really know Megamind. Who was back to doing that calm staring thing again.
"What?" Wayne asked. Did he have something on his face? He had shaved for this.
"You're worried about turning into noticeably alien outcast. Like me. Only a gay me. A gay me that everyone hates. Correct?" Megamind laid it all out, eyebrows raised. Wayne winced at the phrasing. It sounded completely stupid when said like that.
"I just don't…. I don't want people up in my life judging. I want to start over. I want to play my music and maybe have someone listen to it someday. Maybe meet a nice guy and not have to worry about who I used to be. I just don't want to be Metro Man anymore". Wayne replied, hoping that he had somewhat answered the blue alien's question in all that rambling.
"Well then the big news here isn't the death of Metro Man. It's the life of Wayne Scott.," Roxanne said, eyebrows arching as though the lightbulb was going on.
"What do you mean by that?" Wayne asked, having literally no clue where this was going.
"You don't want judgment and pity? Then you need to get ahead of this story. We don't need a sheepish and apologetic press conference. We need a big bold one where you admit to the world that you are Metro Man while your good friends Megamind and Roxanne Ritchie who have known for years stand by your side. You say that you need to come forward and do the right thing before Megamind is charged with murder and that you support his bid to be Metro City's new hero. We clarify that your death was faked, but that won't be the headline. The headline is going to be Metro Man revealed to be Wayne Scott." Roxanne explained excitedly. Wayne took a moment to take that in.
"But doesn't that run into the same problems? People are going to think I'm nuts for faking my own death. And possibly nuts for becoming a superhero in the first place." He stressed.
"They might think you're a little kooky, but that's when we hit them with the one-two punch," Roxanne said wickedly. "We tell them that you're gay". Wayne's jaw literally dropped and before he could pick it up, Megamind was interrupting her.
"Wait, why would that be relevant and how does that help us?"
"It has to do with shocking the shit out of the press". She elaborated. "Look I get the realities of my profession. With the 24 hour news cycle being what it is, most reporters only focus on one or two things at a time. The story will be all about your mysterious reveal and then about your sexual orientation. Yes there will be some people who are awful and judgmental, but overall, you're going to surprise them so much that they will probably just spit and sputter at you. There won't be much need to dig through your secrets if you're throwing them out into the open. We'll set up an interview with the gay press the next day, pretty much guaranteeing that though they will ask about your faked death, they'll be more interested in your coming out story. And by day three, they will be on to something else. Maybe we can even get you a book deal or a record contract out of this," she mused.
"I don't know if I can do that," Wayne said. "I don't… I…. yes I'm gay but what if they ask me all kinds of nosey questions about it?"
"Look, they're going to ask you the same five questions they ask every gay celebrity," She started to tick them off on her fingers. "1) Why are you coming out now, 2) When did you first know, 3) Are you seeing anyone, 4) What was it like to be a closeted superhero/actor/athlete/whatever and 5) What are your future plans. That's the playbook. We coach you on those and you're golden. You don't answer this as Metro Man, you answer as Wayne Scott."
"I don't know Roxie…." He trailed off. "I don't want to put Metro Man back out there in the public spotlight…. But I have no idea how to be in the public spotlight as Wayne Scott. I spent years trying to make sure no one ever thought to conflate the two….."
Megamind snorted. "It wasn't exactly some brilliant disguise. I don't know how most humans didn't just figure it out by looking at your hair." Wayne shrugged and conceded that he had a point.
"Look, you said you want your own life. Do you want that life to include being honest about who you really are? About who you were and what lead you here?" She pressed. And he did, he really really did. He had never thought of it as an option before. Now that it was there, tantalizing him, he considered it for the first time.
"It's just complicated" he tried to explain. "I say I'm gay because that's the closest word I have for it on this planet. But I don't even think my home planet had a concept of gender. I just know that I've gone through my entire life and a woman has never caught my eye. But I could spend hours looking at the cute guys at the grocery store. I'm not going to be able to be this gay poster child for them."
Roxanne cocked her head with a devilish smile. "No, see that makes it even better. You've just proved to all the awful homophobes out there that gay people exist all over the universe. That the ones we have on this planet are not alone. This is brilliant. Just say that."
"My people were much the same way," Megamind chimed in. "They didn't care. It was important to find a mate to share your life with. These limited conceptions of gender and sexual orientation are completely human constructs. I fail to see any purpose in them".
"See," Roxanne smiled brilliantly at both of them. "This story just gets better and better. You support Megamind as hero, he supports you in coming out. We never focus the story on your death. We focus on moving forward."
Wayne sat quietly, looking at Roxanne with her brilliant face and Megamind with his thoughtful calm. This was the craziest shit he had ever heard. And the craziest thing about it was that it made so much sense. As far as plans go, this wasn't terrible. This was actually good. Well he thought it was good. And honestly, planning had never been his strong suit. Mostly he just charged into a situation but this was different. This was irreversible, and if he messed up….
"What do you think Megamind?" he looked his former adversary straight in the eye.
"Me?" Megamind asked with legitimate surprise.
"Yeah you. You're the smartest person I know. What do you think?" Wayne pressed. Megamind smiled, clearly flattered.
"I think that Roxanne is brilliant and her plan demonstrates a vast knowledge of both the media industry and the intricacies of human behavior," he said honestly.
"But if you were me", Wayne pressed. "What would you do?"
"…. If I were you?" Megamind said softly. "I would do it." Wayne took that in and nodded to himself.
"Ok", he said quietly. "I'm in. Just let me talk to my mom first? She's gonna flip and I don't want her to find out from national TV." He was going to do this. Oh god he was really going to do this.
Roxanne shrieked and threw her arms around him again. "Wayne Scott I take back everything bad I ever said about you!" He chuckled under his breath. Classic Roxanne, willing to fight dragons one moment and forgive and forget the next. Maybe this thing she was having with Megamind had a chance in hell after all. If anyone could forgive him for his mistakes it was her. And he had to admit that he wasn't blind. He knew Megs had to have had some kind of crush on her. Who kidnaps the same woman almost every week for over 10 years unless they like spending time with her? Roxanne moved away from him and Wayne was left staring at Megamind. Who was actually looking nervous. Wayne started to break the silence at the same time Megamind found his own voice.
"I never thought I would ever-" Megamind started at the same time Wayne said "Consider this a first –". They both halted and said "You go" at the same time. Wayne waited for Megamind to go first.
"I never thought that I would ever thank you for anything. I know its hard to fix a mess even if you created it yourself," Megamind said awkwardly, sneaking a look at Roxanne she smiled at him and shook her head as though laughing at an inside joke. "So thanks". He ended stoically and looked at the former hero.
"Consider it the first steps in me making it up to you for when we were kids," Wayne said, as genuinely as he could. Megamind's mouth made a little o shape in surprise. "I…. I was a real shit. I made your life miserable to pump myself up and I want you to know I'm sorry. That's not who I want to be with the new and improved real Wayne Scott. I'm gonna have your back this time. Yours and Roxies."
Megamind looked absolutely frozen in shock and Wayne waited for him to say something. But he had actually shocked the verbally dexterous alien speechless. Roxanne put her hand on Megamind's shoulder tenderly and said simply "Thank you Wayne". He smiled. Not a brilliant toothpaste-ad Metro Man smile, but a smaller real Wayne Scott smile. Megamind looked at Wayne as though he was seeing him for the first time.
"We should be going," Roxanne said and Megamind nodded. "Thanks for having us over Wayne. Call me after you talk to your mom ok?" Wayne agreed and she took Megamind's hand in hers and started walking to the door.
"Hey little buddy" Wayne said abruptly. Megamind turned around and faced him. "You and Roxie?" he asked with a knowing smile. He could see Megamind blush. "What's the deal?"
"She is my girlfriend," he answered awkwardly. "Because we are dating. She is dating me". Wayne was amazed at how he could be both bashful and so proud at the same time. Roxanne laced her fingers in with his and they both smiled at each other. Ok, he had to admit that they were adorkable together. He shook his head.
"It's my duty as her friend and big brother figure to tell you that if you break her heart, I'll break your face. But honestly I'm not really worried about it." Wayne said with a cheeky grin. He made a mental note to ask Roxie for all the details later.
Megamind nodded seriously, as though they were making a legally binding contract. "If I hurt her, you have my permission to break my face". And with that, they walked out the door hand in hand.
Wayne looked around at the now empty room as he closed the door behind them. Momentos and trophies. Pieces of the past surrounded him and here he was, about to step into a totally new present. He picked up a guitar absentmindedly and strummed out some cords. He had eyes that could see through lead and he could deflect bullets. He had protected the earth from meteors and thieves and something Megamind once called "The Bootwheel of Death". But for the first time since childhood he found himself facing a world where anything could happen. He wouldn't have to hide his superpowers from his mother's friends. He was gonna hang out and watch movies with his former nemesis. He could smile in public and not worry about someone seeing a resemblance. If Megamind could find someone willing to date him, maybe he could get a boyfriend. Or god a husband. That thought both excited and overwhelmed him.
And thinking about a boyfriend brought up a memory. He remembered when they were working on the Metro Man Museum and he would occasionally have meetings with one of the curators who spent his life studying his rivalry with Megamind. He was an adorably witty guy who always wore tweed suit coats and had the craziest hair. Barry? Was his name Barry? Maybe Roxanne would know. Wayne was pretty sure he was gay, just call it a hunch. Maybe once he wasn't dead anymore, Barry would want to get coffee some time.