I can't wait for next weeks episode, but that little teaser trailer got me thinking… then typing…
(Another one of my spontaneous one shots.)
Enjoy!
He liked her, always had. They might've butted heads and created hell for the other's life but he liked her.
Provenza sighed as he reclined back in his arm chair. There were divorce papers on Sharon's desk; sitting there idly for a signature that would possibly never come. He knew it had something to do with Flynn. Nothing was ever done by her for him even though, everything he did was for her.
Putting distance between a killer and a hostage was for her safety. Caring and looking out for Rusty was to make her job as a parent- legal guardian- easier. Checking up with and keeping an eye on Flynn was to make sure whatever she was doing with him wasn't just a fling. She really cared for Flynn, she had that longing in her eyes his wives used to have for him.
He was getting old. She was getting old. Flynn was getting old.
They all just wanted the same three things: to be loved and needed and cared for. Was that too much to ask?
Her estranged husband was never liked by anyone. They all put on faces and coughed up laughs. Sure the old guy could be funny, but he was never right for Sharon. She was too fragile, too beautiful, and too needed by others to be needed by him.
If Provenza had learned anything from his marriages, it was that everyone woman has a different manual but they all want the same thing: love. They need to be needed. They long to be longed for. They want someone to hold them after a nightmare, shower them with kisses in the mornings, treat them to lunch on a work day. Most wanted romantic gestures that made them feel as they needed to feel. Provenza could never get that right. He was always awkward around women, regardless the age. His timing was poor. His gestures were half-assed. His effort was minimal.
That was until her met Sharon. She had a thing for Flynn even way back when. He was hardest shelled and most mysterious of them all. Provenza heard stories of the good days Flynn had with his wife and daughter; picnics in the park, vacations, and even trips to the beach.
Provenza shivered at the thought of even going near a beach.
"If the sand, water, and the sun were gone it would be pleasant," he mumbled as he stared at his crossword puzzle.
He remembered going after her once she had informed a mother that both her kids were dead. Her brittle voice and glassy eyes had pleaded with him to leave her be. He loved her too much to do that. Seeing her standing there in a power suit, hair tucked behind her ears, her stern Captain facade gone for the time being, broke his heart. If she could be reduced to this after a simple mistake, he could only wonder how many nights she had cried herself to sleep because Jack hadn't kept a promise.
He bet she had stopped crying over the promises he had broken to her (she had been stood up at reservation only restaurants more times than she cared to count to give a damn anymore). It was the promises he broke to his kids that he knew she cried about. She was a married single mother working a full time job with two kids. Days were longer than twelve hours for her. She'd break to make dinner for her kids and tuck them in at night but then she would work again, all through the night. She kept a spare key in the doorframe. She hoped one day someone would just barge through that door and tell her to get some rest. Demand her to fix things with her husband or be allowed to have some joy of her own outside of family life. Command her to just have a good cry over her husband and move on.
She lived a life by the book. She liked rules because of the structure. She liked the law because it needed to be enforced. She wished life came with a rule book. If it did, she would have followed it word for word.
Provenza remembers vividly how a single tear had slipped from her eye and followed the frame of her cheek. He realized then that he really loved her. But she loved Flynn; he could tell. He didn't want to get in the way of his best friend and his boss.
But Flynn wasn't there then. He was.
She dropped her head and an auburn curtain veiled the tears that followed the lone drop. She fidgeted with her fingers. Bending, twisting, and rubbing them harshly. It was as if she was trying to wipe some sort of bad residue from them; it was as if she was trying to wipe her conscience from her hands.
"Hey, hey," Provenza had whispered in a modulated voice. He went around her office closing the blinds, but he knew everyone was gone already. He came back and stood in front of her. He watched her mess with her hands. He grasped hers wrists, each of his thick chubby hands curled around her thin wrists.
No one should be that thin.
She looked after everybody, but rarely did anyone really look after her. He knew Flynn made sure she ate at work but when she went home it was in her jurisdiction. The kid cooked sometimes, and if he did Provenza knew she would eat. Other than that, it was her control.
"You did the right thing," Provenza comforted. Even though he had been against with holding the information of the children the whole case, he knew she was right. She was always right.
After they had had their little comfort scene, things went back to normal. He watched her and Flynn from a distance.
Sharon loved Flynn, but was confused if it was really Andy she loved or if it was just what he was presenting himself as.
Flynn loved Sharon, but was puzzled about on the terms their 'relationship' was on.
Provenza loved Sharon, but he only wanted to see her happy so he let her love Flynn. And if their relationship were ever to backfire, he silently vowed to be there for her. He vowed to always be there for her in a time of need.
…
"I just wanted one thing in life, and I swear it's just one thing- well actually it might be considered two…" Sharon whispered to Flynn as they waited for the elevator. Provenza stopped to watch their encounter. He would take the next elevator if he needed to.
"And what is that?" Flynn asked with a smile on his face as he looked into those green eyes that held so much emotion.
"I just wanted to be loved and grow old with someone. You know just share a life of trouble and joy to watch dogs chase children then grand children and maybe even great-grandchildren. Do your think that is too much to ask for?"
No, Provenza whispered to himself as his shoulders sank slowly.
"No," Andy whispered to her ash he tucked a strand of her behind her ear.
"It's silly and it won't ever happen now," Sharon said sadly, leaning into Andy's palm that cupped her cheek lightly.
"Why is that?"
"He signed the papers."
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