Dungeons and Dragons: A Pale Tale

By Scott Tettamble

A/N: I've always loved the old D&D cartoon, especially since I've been a DM since I was ten (I'm currently 39). I've always wondered what it would be like to walk the realms and have adventures with the kids. This is just a bit of wish fulfillment, by way of a 4th edition character of mine (Yes, as a matter of fact, I happen to LIKE 4E. Get over it!). I hoping what few readers I'll probably have (if any) will like Serath and some of my other characters who have made the translation from earlier editions. I've had Thwomp since AD&D 2nd edition. He was just too much fun to play around with, and he made life interesting for my players. Only my characters belong to me, as all the other stuff belongs to it's rightful owners. I am, however, very grateful to Gary Gygax. He helped create a world for us all to play in, and I hope he's still slinging stories in the next life. Much love, big guy!

Chapter 1: Awakening

When I was released from the enchanted coffin that I had been imprisoned in, I never expected to be awakened by a pack of children. It took me a little while to come all the way to consciousness, but the voices of the children helped guide me.

"Eric, I don't think we should have opened that door. This looks like an old tomb of some kind."

"What? You think we should stay out in that storm, and drown? This was the only shelter around, Diana."

"Yeah. I know. I just don't want to wake anything up in here. You know the dead don't always stay dead in this world."

I snorted quietly. That girl spoke truer than she knew. Heavens knew it applied to me, at any rate. Opening the coffin lid, I began coughing on the rain of dust that fell on me. I was very stiff and very sore, but I knew the cure for that. Now if I could just get past those children...

The first one I saw was the boy. He was a handsome lad, with a noble's bearing. His raven black hair was plastered to his skull with what I was assuming to be rain water. He bore a shield, and was fairly well armored. The girl was similarly soaked, and was absolutely beautiful, with skin the color of varnished oak. She carried a small rod, which led me to wonder if she was a mage. Her clothing, what little there was of it, suggested another path, however.

The hunger was beginning to claw at my gut, which meant I needed to get out and hunt. I was not about to take any chances with these children's lives. Clearing my throat, I stepped into view. The reaction was instant, and very defensive. These two had known combat, I realized.

"Forgive me, you two. I did not mean to startle you. I heard your voices, and realized I had company in here."

"Who-Who are you?"

I turned my gaze to the boy, who looked absolutely terrified.

"I am called Serath the Pale by my friends. My enemies have other names for me, most of which I cannot repeat before a lady. What might I call the two of you?"

The girl seemed to perk up a bit, and made introductions.

"I'm Diana. The guy in the armor is Eric. We're actually waiting for some friends of ours to catch up with us."

"Yeah," said the boy with a sneer. "So don't get any funny ideas, pal."

I couldn't help but chuckle a bit at that, but to soften the blow to his ego, I said "Young man, I wouldn't dream of it. In point of fact, I was rather hoping that you would keep a weather eye on this place while I go out to hunt. I'm starving, and you two look like you could use a good meal yourselves. I would be perfectly happy to share anything I catch with you, if you're interested."

The two of them agreed readily, and I found myself heading out into the pouring rain with a smile.

By the time I returned to the tomb, the others in their party had caught up with them. The deer I had managed to catch (barely), I carried over my shoulders. I called out a greeting to the group, and entered the tomb.

Someone had built a fire, and I immediately began butchering the deer for the others to eat. Soon everyone was enjoying the smell of roast deer as it cooked, and I was introduced to the others of the party. Their ranger was a strapping blonde named Hank, who carried a magical bow of lightning. The younger boy, who was also a blonde and whom I mistook for Hank's younger brother, was named Bobby. He carried a club of some power, and a bit of a chip on his shoulder. Not that I blame him, seeing as the unicorn foal he was snuggling with became intensely nervous in my presence. Uni, as she was called, could probably sense that I was not what I seemed to be.

As I said, I mistook Bobby to be Hank's younger brother, but in fact, he was the younger sibling to the final member of the party. The shy redhead was called Sheila, and she was the party's rogue, or thief, as she titled herself.

As I got to know the children a bit, I learned that they were hoping to run into someone they called Dungeon Master, apparently a wizard of no small amount of power and skill. They were also trying to avoid another powerful mage, one of demonic descent called Venger. Two mages of such power, and I had never heard of either of them. It only confirmed my fears that the world I was on was not my own.

I kept my fears to myself, but in my heart, I damned the one who had imprisoned me in that coffin to the deepest of Hells. He had not only jailed me for an untold number of years, but had also left me on an unknown world. Any allies I might have had were nowhere to be found in this place, and if I wanted to survive, I had best start making new ones. The children seemed like a good place to start.

Hank seemed to be the leader of the group, so I spoke to him first.

"Hank, it seems we are on the horns of the same dilemma. I am also stranded here in a world not my own. If you would have me, I would gladly join your party, and add my abilities to your own."

Before Hank could say anything, Eric shouted "Hang on a second, Hank! We don't know anything about this guy! How do we know he isn't working for Venger?"

I could not contain the glare I sent his way. Eric was beginning to irritate me.

"Young man, until tonight, I had never even heard of this Venger character. Remember, I am not from this world either. My world is slightly similar, but only slightly. As for my skills, I am an accomplished hunter, and as the bastard son of a noble, I am passably familiar with diplomacy. Also, I am a vampire of some age, and I could be useful to you in getting us past other undead. Most monsters I know of won't fight a vampire, especially over food. If I can convince any monsters we encounter that I intend to eat you all, it may stave off a fight."

The reaction to my little announcement was immediate. There was much shouting, bleating, and a great deal of ruckus. After a few moments of it, I decided that enough was enough.

"Quiet down, all of you! Yes, I am a vampire, and yes, I do drink blood. Usually the blood of animals, but the blood of an enemy works just as well. I never drink the blood of the innocent, which applies to all of you, unless it is offered with full knowledge of what I am. In my world, I am not in the habit of hiding what I am, because where I'm from, the undead are accepted, if not necessarily liked. I realize that that may not apply here, but I see no reason to start a partnership with you by lying. I am what I am, and I make neither excuses nor apologies."

While the children discuss the ins and outs of having me with them, I looked at the unicorn. She seemed to be glaring at me with some unfriendly intent, but I merely rolled my eyes. I had little use for an immature unicorn, and she obviously had no use for me. Her companions were another matter, and I hoped we could come to an accord.

As it was, the children were unable to complete their conference. A group of orcs stumbled into the tomb, and upon realizing who the occupants were, attacked us. The leader shouted "Get their weapons! Venger will reward us!"

I rose from my place beside the fire, and felt my fighting blood begin to burn.

"You will not live to claim that reward, foolish one," I hissed with menace.

I knew my eyes were glowing as I locked my gaze with the leader of the orcs. As I did so, his weak will became mine, and I beckoned him.

"Come to me, and feed my thirst."

The other two, upon realizing that I was neither human, nor vegetarian, shrieked with terror and bolted into the night. I nearly had my hands on the leader when I felt Hank's hand on my shoulder.

"Serath? You can let him go now. The others are gone."

Sighing with frustration, I released the orc, letting him join the others in crashing through the rainy night. Turning to the party leader, I said "Hank, while I admire your principles, I question your judgment. You do realize that they will alert their master to our location, don't you?"

I nearly jumped out of my skin when I heard a voice behind me say "Oh, I doubt Venger will bother you any more tonight. Even he has enough sense to get in out of the rain."

Turning to glare at the little man, I garnered a glare in return.

"You should not be here, vampire. This is not your world."

I could not contain my sour expression as I growled "You speak as if I had a choice in the matter. I take it you are the Dungeon Master these children were telling me about?"

"I am. You are the one who was once known as Serath the Pale, who was betrayed by his wizarding master, and turned into a vampire against his will. While I understand, and even sympathize with you, Vampire, your brand of justice is not needed here."

I snorted derisively, and snapped "That may be, but I do not believe that is your decision to make. I bargain with the children, not you. They have my oath that I will abide by their code of conduct, so long as they are willing to make allowances for me." Turning my gaze to Hank, I said "What say you, Ranger? Will you allow me to join your party, and add my powers to your own?"

While the children conversed with each other on the matter, I turned back to the one called Dungeon Master.

"Since you seem to know so much about me, perhaps you could tell me how long I was in that enchanted coffin? I had no sense of passing time, but it is evident that it has been a long time since I last saw the sky."

The look on the little man's face was sorrowful as he answered.

"It has been a thousand years since you last walked in your own realm. I am sorry, Vampire. Even if you were to return to your world, it would not be the world you knew."

His words struck me like the blow of a war hammer. A thousand years? My master would be dead, and knowing that the bastard had betrayed me, I could not feel sorry for that. My lover, however, I would never see again, even if I returned. Even elves are not so long lived, and Zerianna had to have died centuries ago. I had nothing to return to, and noone to mourn my disappearance. I sat down heavily on a nearby stone, and heaved a sigh of grief. I could feel the tears sting my eyes, and wiped them away quickly. It would not do for the children to see blood dripping down my face.

The others finally came to a decision, and Hank spoke for them all.

"Serath, we all know what it's like to be far from home. You're welcome to join us, if you want to."

"I do," I said with a slight smile. I could not help myself. It was not every day that you found people willing to accept a walking dead man into their ranks.

Dungeon Master sighed, and said "Well then, I suppose you'll need a weapon."

I shook my head, and chuckled quietly.

"No, Dungeon Master. I've little use for weapons, and even less skill with them. My hands have always served me best in that regard. However, I could use something to protect me from the sun. I'll be of little use to this party if I cannot travel during the day."

There was a slightly smug look on the little man's face, but he granted my request. He pointed a finger at me, and a ray of yellowish white light flashed out in my direction. A moment later, I felt something settle across my shoulders.

"That cloak should suffice for your needs. While you are in direct sunlight, it will envelope you in shadows and darkness."

Turning to the others, he proceeded to tell them of a possible way home. While I could see it for the blatant manipulation that it was, the children trusted him. Thus, I remained silent until I was certain that Dungeon Master was gone.

"While I don't wish to be ungrateful, you do realize that he is using you for his own ends. He sends you to a problem area with a cryptic clue, and you solve his problem for him. I'm guessing it's been at the cost of your way home several times."

The children gave me affirmatives all around. I shook my head and sighed.

"Aye. That's the way of things, I suppose. There was noone like him on my world, but adventuring parties like us were quite common. I was part of one myself, and we were essentially traveling problem solvers. Righting wrongs, and avenging the spilling of innocent blood. It was in one such party that I met my beloved. Zerianna was a ranger, much like Hank, although her weapons were not magical. As she was a rather young elven maiden when we first became lovers, we assumed we would have several centuries together."

My emotions overcame me at that point, and I could not continue. I felt bloody tears leaking from my closed eyes, and did not give a tinker's damn. This was my party, and they had a right to see me grieve. I let them comfort me, and I awoke with my head in Diana's lap. I sat up, and wiped at the crusted blood on my face.

"My thanks, Diana."

"Will you be alright now," she asked, concern evident in her tone.

"In time. I ask your forgiveness, all of you, for having to witness that. It is not every day that one finds out that they have lost their love, their world, and a thousand years of their life all in one night."

"It's okay, Serath," said Hank in a gentle voice. "We all have our bad days."

"Perhaps," I returned, feeling a bit sheepish. "I think we've dealt with my blubbering for a time. Perhaps a tale before we all turn in for the night?"

And so it was that I regaled them with a tale about the sentient flesh golem, Thwomp the barbarian, a creature I had not only met, but traveled with for a time. I told them of his first encounter with the spiders of the Underdark, and the destruction that followed. Bobby particularly liked the story, and badgered me for more. Eric was considerably more skeptical, and voiced his opinions.

"That's a load of crap!"

I chuckled, and replied "I'm sure most of the Underdark wishes it were. The dark elves do not remember him fondly, I can tell you that much. He cut a path through their capital city in a fit of panic, and destroyed one of their temples in the process. None of us had any idea that he was so afraid of spiders. You wouldn't think he would be, seeing as he was completely immune to their venom, but then he technically shouldn't have been sentient to begin with. The wizard that created him was powerful, but he was also quite insane. The whole creation process was flawed, and truth be told, Thwomp was not his first attempt. As I was told, the first two attempts were even worse. The first was, as I understand it, some sort of demented pixie with a severe deformity of some sort. The second was a creature that seemed to be little more than fur, sharp teeth, and appetite. The wizard finally decided to build the kind of body he wanted his guardian to have, and then enchant it to do what he wanted it to do. Why he chose to use wild magic, I will never know, but he did, and Thwomp was the result."

Sheila was leaning against Hank's shoulder, a content smile on her face, and I could not help but smile as well. It was she who asked the next question.

"What about the other ones? The people you traveled with? What were they like?"

I closed my eyes as the memories washed over me, and I felt my smile become a grin.

"Perhaps another night. We have an early start tomorrow, and the exploits of those gleeful maniacs could take several days to tell. We caused a lot of trouble in those days, even while we were putting a stop to it."

There was a bit of groaning and complaining, but Hank put a halt to that, and we all went to sleep to the sound of rain and the crackling of a camp fire.

By the gods, I had missed those sounds!