Akatsuki Fun

You slide into the seat and shut the door behind you. Already you can feel your heart pounding as you placed your hands on the wheel. You stare out of the windshield and bite your lip.

Driving lessons.

You have no idea who is teaching you, nor do you know who would be in the car with you. You wait silently for your teacher to show up as you tighten your grip on the wheel. Finally, the passenger side door opened, and the person who got into the car was…

"Itachi?" You stuttered as you gape at the Uchiha. "You're teaching me how to drive?"

Itachi shrugged his shoulders and nodded. "Looks like it."

"But you're blind!"

"I'm only half- blind, thank you very much!"

"Yeah, but still-"

"Are we ready to get this party started?!" Someone shouted excitedly as they slid into the back seat of the car. It was Deidara, followed by Kakuzu and Hidan. You twist in your seat and groan.

"Of course I would get stuck with you guys." You murmured. "Just don't distract me, ok?" Fat chance of that happening.

"Alright everybody," Itachi said. "Since I'm your teacher for these driving lessons, you need to call me Itachi-sensei, alright?"

"Can I not?" You muttered. "It's too… weird."

"No."

You frown.

"Okay, you can begin." Itachi said, flipping out a clipboard. You eye it nervously.

"Yes Itachi-sensei."

You strap the seat belt over you and take a deep breath. You turn the keys in the ignition and the car roars to life, making you jump. Hidan snickered.

You start to slowly pull out of the parking lot. Your eyes are wide with concentration and your shoulders are hunched as you focused on the road in front of you.

"Can't you go any faster?" Hidan whined, pressing his forehead against the window. "Seriously, we're going like, 30 miles an hour here."

"Forty, thank you very much!" You snapped. You're already on edge without Hidan getting on your nerves.

"Just think of art, yeah." Deidara offered. "The thought of blowing something up with a beautiful piece of art always calms me down."

"Yeah, sure Deidara." You gripe. "But if I do that, then I can't concentrate on the road, and soon enough, we'll be in an accident!"

"You do have insurance for this car, right?" Kakuzu asked. "Because this thing is worth a lot of money and if we do get into an accident-"

"Is that all you think about, Kakuzu?" Hidan said. "Money? I mean seriously, there are much better things out there than cash."

"Like?"

"Like cold-blooded murder and pain!"

"Uhh…"

"No, art is the most precious thing in the world!"

"You need money for art, idiot."

"Not necessarily."

"You don't need any money to experience the feeling of pain!"

"SHUT UP!" You shout, twisting around in her seat. "Honestly, how am I supposed to focus when you guys are arguing here?!"

"Eyes on the road."

"What?"

"LOOK OUT!"

You whip around in your seat again and just barely swerve out of the way of an oncoming car, but in the process you turn into a one way street, and you're going down the wrong way.

"Holy crap!"

"Just turn left!"

"How do you know, YOU'RE BLIND, ITACHI!"

"That's Itachi-sensei!"

"I don't care!"

"Oh my Jashin, we're going to die!"

"You're immortal, Hidan; YOU CAN'T DIE!"

"Why Lord Jashin? Why do you do this to me?!"

"Look out, yeah!"

"Deidara, your hair is getting in my eyes!"

"Don't diss the hair, man, yeah!"

"I can't die! I need to go home to see my babies!"

"You have kids?"

"My money, you idiot!"

"STOP!"

The car screeched to a halt. Everybody lurched forward and then slammed back into their seats by their seat belts. There was a moment of stunned silence, as everybody sat there, shocked, with their mouths hanging open. Deidara's hair was all over the place, Kakuzu's mask had been pushed up over his face, and Itachi was hugging the clipboard as if it were a life-line. They were back in the parking lot.

They all stumbled out of the car and collapsed onto the asphalt, gasping for breath. Itachi pulled his clipboard in front of him and scribbled a few notes.

"Alright, you pass. Who's next?"

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