DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. I wish I did, but I don't.
A/N: FINALLY the much awaited (I hope, anyway) sequel to 'Don't Walk Away'. I'm sorry it took so long, I had a hard time figuring out how to put the words together to make sense. Lol. I'd suggest that you read the first part (and review if you haven't) before reading this one. It'll make more sense? Haha.
Thank you to croaker001 for proofreading and finding all of the mistakes I made in my buzzed state xD YOU'RE AWESOME TONY! I wanna give another thanks to Isla6 for pushing me, somewhat, to write this sequel. She's awesome, too! And thanks to all the reviewers who read and reviewed 'Don't Walk Away', you guys are definitely awesome.
Now please, read and review! K, thanks! HAPPY READING.
MISUNDERSTANDING
Is it wrong that I'm in a 'relationship' with the most perfect person, but emotionally I'm with someone else? It feels wrong, like really, really wrong. Like two puzzles that obviously don't fit together, wrong. Like, like, like me and Rico being together, wrong. Of course, I would NEVER in my life be with Rico, even if he was the last male specimen on Earth. I'd rather have babies with a cow than Rico. See, now that's wrong.
I'm with my best friend, but it feels like the wrong best friend. I should be with the best friend who has bright blue eyes so full of life and everything good in existence, not the one with warm, loving brown eyes.
Everything fell apart the last time I walked out of the room and out the front door with not even a second glance before leaving. There were times when the right best friend tried to speak to me via text messages, emails, instant messages, phone conversations, and even face to face, but my mind was set. I couldn't let her be in my life any more, no matter how much I wanted her to be. It's just wrong. I can't love her how she loves me, I just can't. I never meant for things to turn out the way they did, but my choices and actions state otherwise. It's killing me on the inside, knowing that I ruined everything that we ever worked for, fought for, and built towards throughout the years.
It's my fault why she's halfway across the world while I'm here, stuck with the wrong best friend who thinks I love him so damn much. I must be a great actress. I should win an Oscar for the leading role in deceit and lies. I'm lying to myself, to her, to him... I'm deceitful towards me, her, him... everybody. I'm living a lie. On the outside I'm happy, wonderful. I mean, why wouldn't I be? I have this awesome 'boyfriend' who loves me to death, seriously, a mom who's pretty much my best friend, and just an over all great life. This is all people see, though, what I want them to. They don't really have an all access pass to the thoughts running through my mind. My mind is full of hurt, tears, dreadful thoughts... every fucking negative thing imaginable.
I passed up what could have been the most beautiful, lasting relationship of my life... all because of... I don't even know. Family? Religion? Family and religion? I can understand why family is such a huge factor in this, but I seriously don't understand the religion part... even if it's all me. I mean, my mother taught me that love was between man and woman, and I know that, I just never understood why it was only between man and woman. Especially when I found myself falling for my best friend, who I'm pretty positive is a woman. 100% positively positive. Like, I've seen her in a bikini, and there was no awkward bulge in the crotch area positive. Unless she found a way to hide that dangling part, but then again she pees sitting down, which I know she does... 'cause we've shared a bathroom on more than one occasion. We would wake up late for school, and share the bathroom; she'd pee while I brush my teeth. Okay, now I'm just talking about weird shit.
Anyway, back on topic.
When she confronted me that last time, it was the last straw. I had to prove to myself, and to her, that I wasn't like her. That I could never kiss a girl and like it, even if I did; I could never love her for her, being a girl and all, but I did and I do. I'd never admit it to anyone, except maybe I did. To her. I told her I loved her, kissed her, and walked away. That might have been the most dumbest thing I've ever done in my life. I gave her hope and led her on, when NOTHING was ever going to happen between us.
I had to do something, anything to show her that things between us would never happen. So I enlisted the help of my other best friend, who just happens to be a guy, without him knowing. I know, it's messed up, like Hannah Montana and Jake Ryan messed up. It just doesn't and shouldn't work out, but somehow it does. Somehow, two best friends are supposed to have found their love in each other and go out just like how two celebrities would eventually go out. I've found my love in my best friend, yeah, but it's more of a best friend type of love. With him anyway. With her it was like the "I can't live without you, please don't leave me" type of love. It's too late now, especially with what happened yesterday, two days after the confrontation with her.
I was just sitting on the beach, enjoying the last rays of sunlight, when I felt the presence of another person sitting next to me. I don't even have to turn my head to find out who the person was, his smell was all I needed as a confirmation.
"You alright, Lilly?" he asked, throwing an arm around my shoulder. I nodded in response before leaning my head on his shoulder, and molding into his side. "What's wrong?" he asked again, squeezing me closer to him.
"I-I... don't know." I managed to get out as tears found its way to my eyes. He just held me closer and stayed silent. "Have you ever fell for someone who you know you shouldn't have? Like, the way you feel for them is just wrong, but you can't help yourself?" I asked, squeezing my eyes shut tightly, failing miserably at holding tears at bay.
He pulled me away slightly and I looked up into his concerned, yet comforting brown eyes, "Who Lilly? Who do you have feelings for?" he asked curiously, almost hopefully. I shook my head slightly at the hopeful part, and buried my face even more into the crook of his neck.
"I don't want to say...," I trailed off, wiping my snot away with the bottom of his shirt, "I don't want to lose you, Ollie." I cried and hugged him closer to me as if my life depended on it. When it really comes down to it, my life somehow does depend on him; I wouldn't be who I am without him. We've known each other forever, and I knew he'd always support me, but I didn't really know where he stood with the 'gays and lesbians.' What if I told him that it was Miley I had feelings for and he stopped talking to me? That would definitely hurt more than losing my mother. He's my safety net, my blanket, my dear old best friend.
He gently cupped my cheeks, and turned my gaze to his eyes, "It's okay Lilly, I understand," he said quietly, staring me right in the eyes. I was getting rather uncomfortable with what I saw in his eyes, so full of love and passion. For who? For me? No. Holy shit, it can't be! "I-I like you, too, Lils." he admitted. Oh God.
"I- what?!" I asked dumbfounded, but frozen in place. It felt like my whole body turned into a statue, I didn't move an inch... I don't even think I was breathing! I sat as still as a rock, processing what I was just told. God, this guy really is a donut! How can he think that I like him like that?!
"I get it. You like me like how I like you, but you're afraid I'll slip away," he said gently. "Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere," he assured me before leaning in slowly. I couldn't believe I just sat there, frozen, while he was leaning into me. Before his lips could touch mine though, there was an audible, shaky breath of air being inhaled.
I pulled away from Oliver as though he was the ickiest thing on Earth and my eyes landed on Miley standing a few feet behind Oliver. As she turned to walk away I stood up abruptly, making Oliver land sideways at the spot I was just sitting at. I had to run to catch up to Miley; and when I got to her, I gently grabbed onto her upper arm and turned her to look at me. The look in her eyes made me shrink away, just slightly.
"Really, Lillian?" she asked seething, in a below normal voice... almost growling. She yanked her arm from my grasp and stepped away from me when I tried to grab onto her arm again. "You just had to stoop this low?! Honestly?" she shrieked before running away from me.
"Miley! NO!" I yelled after her, running a few steps before breaking apart all together and crumpling on the sand, right then and there. "I'm so sorry... I'm so sorry!" I cried to myself as I was being rocked back and forth in the arms of none other than Oliver.
I really don't know what Oliver was saying, but it went along the lines of, "it's okay, we'll make it work," and "she'll understand, don't worry." I didn't understand what he meant at that time, but a week later it seemed as though he told everyone that we got together. I didn't have the energy or heart to tell him otherwise;I just played along.
My mother was the most happiest person after she found out that Oliver and I were 'dating', I didn't even try to explain to her. I mean, she was happy, so why not? It seemed as though everyone supported us, except for Miley. I didn't even see her all that week. That day she found us was a Friday, and the following school days, I didn't see her at all. It seemed as though she just fell through the cracks of the Earth and just disappeared altogether.
To say I was worried was an understatement. I was shitting my pants as the days passed by and I didn't see her. I mean, Oliver and I didn't even kiss, so why was she missing all of a sudden?! There were rumors going around school that Oliver and I were dating, but she should have known that they weren't true! She knows me better than that! I know I didn't deny those rumors either, but still! Does she really think I'd do that to her?! All these questions just went unanswered every time they popped into my head, and since the only person who could have answered them decided to disappear all of a sudden, I made up my mind to find her and get the answers.
I was nervous when I was stood outside the Stewart residence. Usually I would just let myself in, like all those other times, but this time it felt different. Like I lost that privilege a week ago when she saw Oliver and me in a compromising position. I waited impatiently as the seconds ticked by. God, it seemed like it took forever for someone to open the door! It usually took less than a second for it to open for me.
When it did open, I was face to face with Jackson who held a neutral look. I was scared for the first time ever, standing right in front of him. I know he and Miley always fought and argued, but when it came down to it, he was always there for Miley when she needed someone to talk to. I gulped before speaking, "Hey Jackson!" I tried to greet with my usual bubbly personality. "Is Miles home?" I asked earnestly, really hoping that she was so we could talk.
He was quiet for a little while, staring intently into my eyes, before shaking his head, no. I felt my shoulders slump downwards before perking up again. "Is it okay if I wait for her here, then?" I seriously wanted to talk to her. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe we could have worked things out. Maybe my mother would understand; Miley was like a daughter to her already, after all.
He shook his head, no, again before actually speaking this time. "She's not here Lilly," he said sternly. I noticed his grip on the door knob get tighter. So maybe Miley did tell him about what happened between us.
"Please! I need to talk to her." I begged, almost pathetically.
"She's gone, Lilly," he said again, never taking his eyes off of my face. "She won't be back for a long time." Was he... was he holding back tears?
"Wh-what do you mean?" I hiccuped, holding back tears of my own.
"She went on tour, Lilly." he explained, blinking his eyes a few times and shaking his head.
I just nodded my head in understanding, even though I was hurt that she went on tour without asking if Lola would go with her, "That's fine!" I tried to sound optimistic. "I'll see her in a couple weeks then!"
To this Jackson clenched his jaw, muscles seen contracting together, and shook his head again. "She went on an International Tour, Lilly." His answer, mixed with the way he said my name, made my blood run cold. "She won't be coming back for another year, maybe even two," he snarled out. "And do you know why?!" he asked loudly, "Because some girl broke her damn heart, that's why!" he yelled before stepping back into the house and slamming the door in my shocked face. Okay, so maybe she did tell him... everything.
I stood there for awhile, just absorbing everything that was thrown in my face. She left? She fucking seriously left?! What happened to "I'm not gonna stop until I get you"? Before I could even finish that thought in my head, the door swung open again and a white envelope was flicked in my face. Before I could even work my vocal chords, the door slammed shut again and this time he pulled the blinds closed. My eyes went from the closed door to the white envelope laying on the floor to the left of my feet.
Slowly, tentatively, I leaned down and picked it up. There was nothing on the envelope, it was left unmarked. I was scared to open the letter, but I did it anyway. As I unfolded the piece of paper, I took in how the words seemed to be scribbled in a rush.
I give up, for now. I know I said I wouldn't stop until I got you, but it hurts too much right now. I realize that you don't want to disappoint your mom, but seeing you all lovey dovey with him at the beach the other day made my heart ache. I'm happy for you, really I am, even if the person you chose to be with wasn't me. I don't want anything to be awkward around us; me, you, and him, so this was the only thing I could think of. I need some time away from you, from everything. Hopefully, by the time I get back, I'll be able to accept what you and he have together without it hurting so much. I know this is all sudden and unexpected, me leaving without a trace, but please, don't forget me? That would just break what's left of my heart even more.
I love you. For always.
MS
I don't remember falling asleep, or even closing my eyes, but when I opened them I was surrounded by the smell that was so her. When I looked around I realized that I was laid out on her bed, which was definitely weird because... well because how the hell did I get there?! As I sat up in bed, I noticed that there was no light shining through from the window. God, how long was asleep?
I was about to push the covers off of me when the light from the bathroom connected to her room caught my eyes. As I studied the bathroom door, I saw movement from inside. "Mi...," my voice was so dry. I moved my tongue around inside my mouth, trying to get some moisture in it, and cleared my throat before trying again, "Miley?" I croaked out. As soon as her name left my mouth, the figure in the bathroom stopped their movement. "Mi... Mr. S?" I asked, wide-eyed and shocked when it was him who walked out of the door, hands grasping a small white bottle. "Where's Miley?" I cocked my head to the side slightly and looked at him through innocent eyes.
He shook his head sadly, and slowly walked up to the bed. "Here, take this Lilly." he said quietly after taking a seat on the edge of the bed. Then he popped the cap off of the white bottle and handed me two pills. I just sat there, my eyes darting from the pills in my hand to Mr. Stewart looking slightly worn out. "Take it," he demanded softly, reaching to the nightstand to pick up a water bottle that was already unopened. I frowned, but did as I was told.
I looked around the room as I was drinking from the bottle and noticed how much more bare it seemed. The usual knick knacks that I was used to seeing weren't thrown haphazardly around her room. "Where's Miley, Mr. S?" I asked again, gripping onto the covers with my free hand while clutching on the water bottle with my other.
"She's gone Lilly," he answered rather painfully, shaking his head. "She left the other day with Roxy. They're already in Europe." I shook my head and threw myself off of her bed.
"NO! NO!" I yelled, "She can't be gone! She didn't even say bye to me!" I was hysterical, tears were falling freely from my eyes. "You, Jackson, and Miley... you guys are just playing a trick on me, right? This mean, humorless joke!" I tried to make up an excuse. "I get it. I love her! I GET IT! Now tell her to come out." I exclaimed, looking around her room. Up, down, left, right, corners, I searched every nook and cranny for her.
"Lilly, calm down!" Mr. Stewart stood up and cautiously made his way to me. I shook my head and backed away from him towards the closet. "You already passed out from crying hysterically on my front porch, I don't want you crying and passing out again." he used a quiet tone, like he was trying to sooth a child throwing a tantrum.
"NO! I don't care! I just want Miley." I ran into her ordinary closet towards the door to her Hannah Closet. "No... no, Miley, no!" I cried out when I ran into an almost empty room. Everything was bare except the awards she won, framed pictures of her and I together at concerts... and all of Lola's outfits. "No. Please, come back." I sobbed, falling onto my knees in the middle of the room. "I love you...," was the last thing I said before blacking out and falling forward. I distinctly heard someone yelling my name out and landing in someone's arms before losing consciousness.
A/N: *hides behind a huge rock* so uhh, did you like it? *Ducks and covers as a shoe's being thrown my way* did you get all the aggression out yet? Did you? K, good. Now review! =) & I know, there will most likely be a third part, unless no one reviews... dun nun nun nun! It's all up to you though. XP
PS: I'm in serious need of a better title for this story. Any thoughts, suggestions, etc. let me know! It'll be greatly appreciated.