Carmilla's hands tremble as she lays the flowers (blue star flowers, her favorite) against the headstone.
She traces the name on the crumbling stone, Laura Hollis-Karnstein, and a quiet sob escapes from slumps to the ground, not caring the dirt will probably mess up her pants because it hurts too much, it hurts without Laura here.
"I miss you, cupcake," she whispers, wondering if Laura will suddenly just show up, scolding Carmilla for getting her new pants dirty and then she'll see Carmilla crying and kiss her softly (like the first time at Silas) but she doesn't appear.
Somehow that realization breaks her even more, and the force of her sobs make her shoulders shake. "I miss you, cupcake," she whispers again, rocking back and forth, one name running through her mind. (She doesn't know how to feel, not since Laura di-. Not since Laura left. So she's been a mess of emotions and mood swings.)
Carmilla wants to scream, she wants to break something, anything.
She stands up angry and kicks Laura's headstone. "You weren't supposed to die, damnit!"
(You weren't supposed to leave me broken.)
"You fucking promised to stay with me!"
(You broke your promise.")
"I hate you," these words are sobbed.
(Please, Laura. I love you, jus-, just come back.)
The only sound is Carmilla's muffled whimpers and she collapses to the ground once more, hugging the gravestone.
"I miss you, Laura," she says softly, closing her eyes, exhaustion taking over her body and she falls asleep.
'I miss you, Carm,' is whispered into her ear and Carm smiles. She dreams of Laura and her soft kisses.