Brooke and Sara Present: Spiders in Turkey high off of Turkey/Turkish Delight
Brooke and Sara Present: Spiders in Turkey high off of Turkey/Turkish Delight
"Harry...can you get the cranberry zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"
"Tonks...Harry and Remus just passed out from the turkish chemical."
"hmmm...that's why its called turkish delight"
"see, tonks, this is why i'm a vegetarian. TONKS! STAY AWAY FROM THE TURKEY! aw crap..."
four hours later "ughh what happened? and why am i married to remus?"
"tonks, you got high off of turkish delight."
"well i can tell you its not delightful at all."
"you sure were saying differently last night, wasnt she, remus"
"gurgling- HANGOVER!!"
"harry, are YOU ok?" "
-gurgles- HANGOVER!!"
"i think it's a hangover, ginny"
"no, tonks, ya think? i think you're still high..."
and ginny and harry were married pre turkish delight, so their 3 and 5 year old sons, albus and james come in.
"mommy why is daddy kissing the toilet?"
"HARRY? what are you doing? are you CHEATING on me?"
"no honey, it's the actual toilet...and its not kissing it's hurls"
"OKAY boys how about you go into the playroom."
"Okeydokeyartichokey"
"tonks? are you alive?"
"HAHAHA LOOK SPARKLY THINGS!!"
"still high... no, i dont think you are, you are always like that"
so tonks and remus look at their ring fingers and are like
"ooooooh crap"
"no kidding i'm married to you."
"SHUT UP, TONKS!"
"both of you quiet! i've got a hangover and my head hurts like a motherfu-"
"DO NOT FINISH THAT WORD, HARRY! THERE ARE CHILDREN IN THE HOUSE!"
"mother trucker is what I meant to say…"
"yeah yeah...just dont let albus and james hear you speaking like that."
enter remus and tonks
"HOLY...YOU TWO CANNOT BE DOING THAT IN MY HOUSE!"
"we…weren't!"
"you guys obviously cannot tell that it is a screen door you are standing in front of"
tonks and remus look around nervously
"you didnt see any thing..."
"because there was nothing to see." haha
"why i never!"
"tonks she wasnt insulting you...so...WHY I NEVER!!"
"!!"
shocked silence as albus enters
"hi mommy, can i have a donut ?"
james enters
"mommy can i have a banana?"
mumbled"oh, the irony"
"yes dear,"
finds two bananas
"but mommyyyyyyyyyyyyyy i wanted a donut. "
"we dont have donuts!!"
"why not? i want a DONUT!"
"You cant have one, because daddy is too drunk to buy you one. go complain to daddy."
"DADDEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!"
"sure, ginny, set the wrath of the hungry 3 year old on me..."
"I WILL"
"Ginny, you are acting bratty."
"am not!!"
"are two times ten!"
"am not times twenty plus one whatever you say!"
"why do you always win?"
"because i'm a girl and you're a boy and therefore destined to be at least a little mentally impaired."
"no, im not! meanie poo-poo face"
james and albus look scandalized at their father
"daddy! how dare you! mommy didnt even call you a diaper baby yet! how dare you use that phrase so uncalled for!"
"yeah, james's right, daddy, that just aint cool." james turns to brother
"what...?"
"i'm going for the ghetto vibe. cute three year old wasnt working for me anymore."
"dude? wtf?"
ginny turns to harry with a tear stained face. "i'm sorry dear. but we need to ban together to prevent our son from being sucked in to the land of ghetto. i was there once. the big booty...the big boots...the big money! the big rats living in the house shudders no no we must get him out of there. albus, say you are sorry."
"fo what, big moma?"
"ALBUS SNAP OUT OF IT!!"
james turns to mom "i'll handle this. BITCH PLEASE! smacks albus upside the head"
sorry mommy, what were we talking about? can i have some cookies?"