"In life there winners and there are losers"
Miz: welcome to the "The Dirt Sheet" today's title: The looser list! whoraa!!
Morrison: the losers...where do we start, Miz?
Miz: let's see (he takes out a list) ...Daniela...
Morison: little Dany...
Miz: awwww, lil Dany...so innocent...so loser...
Morrison: how many times does she have won, ever since she started here?
Miz: let's see...I don't remember
Morrison: you don't, 'cause she hasn't won!
Miz: Uh!
Morrison: no...And she thinks everybody laughs with her...but really...they laugh at her
Miz: JA JA JA JA!
Morrison: next!
Miz: the next loser, and besides retard...llama boy
Morrison: the llama boy
Miz: more like Lame a Boy, HE'S SO RETARDED!
Morrison: more retarded than you!
Miz: that's true! ja!
Morrison: you say right, he goes left, I don't even know where he's looking at
Miz: (looks nowhere, imitating llama boy)
Morrison: NNNNNEXT!
Miz: the qqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqq-
Morrison: just say it!
Miz: queer, Juanki, what's that?
Morrison: yeah, what's Juanki?
Miz: more like Queerki
Morrison: indeed...you see he...or she...is a bad example of men
Miz: men! men! men! men! he's gay!
Morrison: Yeah we kinda figure that out already
Miz: well, he or she is a waist of time, he's a gay loser!
Morrison: NEXT!
Miz: Ms. No body, Monica
Morrison: she hasn't even wrestler, she's just ask stupid questions
Miz: loser!
Morrison: next!
Miz: the wannabe Hardy, Leroy
Morrison: he's just a wannabe, of course, wanting to emitted Jeff, you're gonna end up a loser anyways, hope he doesn't get on drugs
Miz: or loses he's dog, oh and he's tag team partner, is a looooooooooosseeeeerrrrrrr
Morrison: lil "cute" Gee
Miz (imitate Gee with a cute voice): JE JE!
Morrison: sounds like a Teletuvie name
Miz: and he thinks he's all that, but he's all flap
Morrison: the wannabe hardy bros haven't won anything ever since they started, so...they are doing a great job by following the footsteps of the Hardys, keep on the good work
Miz: NOT!
Morrison: next!
Miz: Gabs, what's does she do anyways?
Morrison: I don't know, she just stands there looking hoe-ish
Miz: hoe-ish! ja ja ja!
Morrison: neeeeeext!
Miz: and last...but not least...lil' miss Loveless a.k.a. EMO GIRL!
Morrison: if she wasn't so emo and so focus on cutting her self, she wouldn't be loveless
Miz: ja ja, cutter!
Morrison: oh my gosh, so many losers...but without losers, they couldn't be winners, so... we kinda have to thank them
Miz: NOT!
Morrison: no, no, yeah...remember…"In life there are winners, and there are losers"
Both: be jealous!
That ends this week's ECW. Next week. On Monday Night Raw, Loveless was in the locker room.
Loveless: ugh!!! I'm so fucking pissed! Does assholes! They have no right to just talk about the others like that!
She was throwing any object on her way and Todd came in by the door.
Todd: hi, tonight we are here with loveless, loveless you seem very upset...is that because of what happened in ECW?
Loveless: yes, I'm upset! Does guys have no right to talk about others!
Todd: well, do u have anything to say to them?
Loveless: yes, I-
Juanki appears.
Juanki: I DO! they are some bad motherfucking good-looking bastards! They are so stupid! They know they are not suppose to mess with me! Don't mess with me!
Loveless: don't mess with us! If Morrison wants to keep that rat he calls hair, and Miz wants to keep that bad-ass mohawk they better stop talking shit about us!
Juanki: yeah, bitch!
They, both go out mad. Then on Friday night Smack Down. Monica was interviewing Daniela and Josue.
Monica: welcome to Friday night Smack Down, we are here with Josue and Daniela, so we see your kinda frustrated...and Josue just lost a match...any thoughts?
Josue: fuck them! Fuck them hard! Queers!
Monica: so, last week on ECW, John Morrison and The Miz, attacked you guys really harsh on the "dirt sheet", what do you think?
Josue: q-q-queers!
Dany: I don't care what they say! ...that is all I will say...
Monica: so, have you given any thoughts in not winning any matches since you been here?
Josue: yes....
Monica: so what do u think?
Josue: that...I should win...
Monica: ah...yeah...so why don't you do it?
Josue: I...don't know...I feel so....alone?...
Monica: o...k...and you Daniela?
Daniel: I don't wanna talk about that...it just some bad beginners' luck...yeah...that's all... will just...keep on trying...
Josue: yessss
Monica: thank you, for joining us tonight!
That ends that week's Smack Down. Then, on Sunday night, Backlash. After losing every match in Backlash, in backstage, everybody was laughing at the losers. Even Jeff Hardy was laughing at Leroy. Leroy was behind them, he was very disappointed at seeing is role model laughing at him.
Leroy: asshole!
He toke off the gloves, the Jeff Hardy self-portrait t-shirt and he broke the hardy necklace, and the pearls went rolling on the floor. Gee and Gabs came to him.
Gee: what's wrong?
Leroy: Jeff Hardy is a mother fucking asshole!
Gee: Finally you saw that, man!
Gabs: Leroy, calm down, I'm sure he's not laughing at you!
Then they hear both Hardys laughing at them. Leroy looked at Gabs.
Gabs: what ever! Calm down! Forget that!
Josue comes in walking and trips with the pears.
Josue: AH, YOU DISLOCATED MY ENTIRE BODY!
Leroy: Sorry man (help Josue stand up)
Josue: ok (give a creepy smile)
Leroy: Well, I'm Leroy, a loser and you are Llama Boy right?
Josue: Yes another looser...
Gabs: Hello, I'm here!
Leroy: she is gabs our looser manager…
Gabs: Hi llama boy
Josue: Hi
Leroy: and he is gee...
Josue: Oh, the "JEJE" guy! JAJAJAJAJ (stops laughing) not funny :/
Gee: I'm just the mother fucking "jeje guy"? Damn!...
Mean while. Juanki was talking with Lovesless. Juanki was sad, Loveless, sad, as always.
Juanki: Another lost to the list, puss bags!
Loveless: If we don't do something we are going to be kicked out...so start thinking maybe train more, study the opponent… I don't know…something…
Juanki: Gucci…
Loveless: What?
Juanki: That bitch have a Gucci!! (runs to the person. Is Daniela) OMG! I TOTALLY LOVE YOUR PURSE!!
Daniela: thanks!
Juanki: I'm Juanki and she's my ultimate bff Loveless
Loveless: (all depressed) hi…
Daniela: Hi, I'm the ultimate looser Daniela
Loveless: Welcome to our reality...
Daniela: I'm tired of this. I don't fell like a Diva I fell like an nobody that makes super stars look more awesome.
Juanki: deep girl, deep
Loveless: yeah…
They keep talking, then they hear a bunch of people screaming and they see Leroy, Gee, Gabs and Llama Boy running.
Josue (scared): run for your life!
Loveless: why?
Then they see, behind them, Morrison, Miz, The Hardys, a few divas, Triple H, Edge and a few staff people, trying to humiliate them backstage. Monica was passing by and Gee pushes her by accident. Josue opens the first door he sees. He was scared about all those people screaming how looser they where. They all enter and end up in a dark room they put the lucks to the door so the ambush couldn't harm them.
Josue: that's my foot!
Loveless: This one?
Gee: MY HAND!!
Juanki: There someone over me! Who is the pedophile!?!?
Josue: oh, my fucking goat!
Monica turns on the lights.
Monica: every one ok?
Gabs: Turn off that lights!
Every one look very scared, Monica looks back and there is the Undertaker.
Monica: oh… my… god… Look sir I'm very sorry, we are losers and-
Undertaker: I was waiting for you…
Out side the door is the ambush screaming.
Undertaker: give me a minute…
He goes out the door, looks to the ambush.
Undertaker: looking for something?
Miz: Umm... my pony...
Undertaker: is not here… you should go
Miz: ok I'm going…. look at me how I go
All the punks go and let the "losers" in peace.
Matt: I think someone needs a new pair of under wear
Jeff: that person is you, Matt
Matt: lucky guess my friend
Morrison: a pony, Miz?
Miz: What you what me to say? that guy is huge!