"Okay his bottles are in the refrigerator, diapers next to the couch , pacifiers...the blue one is his favorite, and he loves his teddy bear so that'll keep him happy to, as well as the the rainbow rattle. Oh, and don't forget that give him his blue blanket when he falls to sleep it has my perfume so it reminds me of him," Olivia rambled to the babysitter she spent forever finding.

She had become very close to Noah and she had spent the past few days bringing him to work, searching online for the best rated babysitter. She had known everything about Noah and made sure he had the best.

The young babysitter smiled at her and nodded as she bounced Noah on her hip. "No worries , I will have everything under control,"

"And you promise to call in case anything happens right?" Olivia added quickly as she slowly backed away towards the front door. She had moved back into her old apartment and even redecorated it so she can try and erase memories of Lewis. Plus she couldn't stay there remembering that her ex boyfriend Brian Cassidy stayed there as well. It was just to painful to stay.

Olivia smiled at Noah and left her apartment, saddened that she had to leave her baby behind for a day of traumatizing cases.

#=#=##=#=#=The Svu Squadroom#=##=#=#=

Olivia sighed as she sat at her desk again. Olivia didn't lie but she wished Declan Murphy was back here to help her run things. Not only did he help her keep herself in line but he saved her shield door God's sake. She had thanked him for it but she still felt like she owed him more. Either way she really did miss him.

She especially missed Cragen. He would have told her what to do and would have gotten her together. So would have Elliot.

Elliot.

She had really gotten over him and didn't even want to speak to him. After all her calls and all her texts. He ignored her. Yet she understood he had a family, but she also admitted she was upset because wasn't she basically family? They always acted close, IA even feared they were TOO close. They read each other's minds, they were in sync and they could read each other like a book.

Olivia was lost in thought when she heard a knock at her door. She looked up and nearly jumped out of her seat when she saw Dean Porter walk in her office. He closed the door behind him and gave her a weak smile.

"Uh...Detective Benson,"he said.

"Its Sergeant," she said harshly.

"Uh...listen the FBI has me working here on a case, well I offered to take it,"

"Why?"

"To see you," he said and Olivia rolled her eyes and snorted. He quickly started to talk almost as if he was begging. "Listen Olivia what happened between us last time, was the job and I was stupid. I know you blocked my number when I tried to call. Listen I apologize from the bottom of my heart, I want us to fix our rela-...our friendship at least and I don't want you hating me the entire time we're working this case,"

"Dean," Olivia said more softly. "It going to take a while before I will ever start trusting you again," he looked down sadly like a sad puppy dog and Olivia couldn't help but find it cute. She walked up to him and gently touched his hands.

"But we can try,"

Dean looked up and smiled at her. "And...I heard about the Lewis thing an-...I'm sorry, I sent roses when you were in the hospital and I -"

Olivia put a her finger on his lips to keep him from talking. "Dean, Dean...it's okay. Thank you, I'm fine. Now...the case?"

"Oh yes," he said as she took her finger off of him. They both walked out into the squad room , to the erase board and Olivia called the team over. They all sighed ready for another heart wrenching case. Fin who had known Dean Porter and the last remembered his asshole antics with Elliot and Olivia on a case a few years prior, glanced at Olivia and she gave a weak smile.

"Well you see we have been chasing a unknown criminal who have been raping women and hanging their bodies in abandoned buildings. One in an abandoned apartment building in Bronx, another in an abandoned sandwich shop in Jersey and many more. We need to hurry and catch this guy,"

"Anything special about him?" Nick asked.

"He always leaves a weird snake burn on their left breast," Dean said

Nick who had known about the burnings Lewis caused on Olivia, glanced over at Oliva and saw her biting her nail while her eyes were closed.

"The last person to see Allison Kane, the first victim that was found was her ex boyfriend Jason Luther who has a wrap sheet for beating women and the third victim who died in Bronx , Jason just happen to be there for a book signing,"

"Rollins and Fin, go and speak to the boyfriend. Nick go speak to Allison's parents," Olivia said.

All of them had noticed that Olivia had used Amanda's last name instead of her first, but all didn't speak any of it.

As they grabbed their costs and left Olivia pulled her cellphone to text the babysitter to check up on Noah and she didn't notice Dean was starting at her.

Dean Porter had always had something for Olivia Benson. He loved her passion, her drop dead gorgeous looks, her warm heart, and her dedication. He watched as her now short chestnut hair shined under the lights as they hit her shoulders. Dean even inhaled the her smell of vanilla and jasmine.

Olivia put her phone back in her pocket and had a bright smile on her face.

"What is it?" Dean asked watching her lovely smile, something he'd want to see a lot from now on.

"Oh my son is playing with the babysitter,"

"Oh...your marr- "

"Oh no!" Olivia quickly interrupted him, waving her hand. "Oh no...he's my foster son. But I love him to death. Yeah but, sadly I'm ...single"

Dean felt a sprang of hope and smiled at him.

#=#=#=#=#

Soon, it was already eight and they had nothing. Sadly the airhead asshole suspect boyfriend, had an alibi when Fin an Amaro interrogated him so they were once stuck data dead end. Olivia told everyone to go home and take a break and she and Dean went out to lunch together , after he offered.

"What is this place?" Olivia asked as she sat down in a booth that was near a tall window.

"Oh this?" Dean smiled. "This is Luchino's, one of the best Italian sandwich shops in all of Manhattan. Go ahead and order,"

"Well how much do you have?" Olivia asked as she raised her menu. "I don't want to spend all your money. See I know I should have brought my credit card,"

"No,no" Dean reached over and touched her elbow. "Just get what you want. I want you to enjoy whatever you eat,"

"They way I'm getting I think I need to lower on the fat" Olivia joked but Dean took it seriously.

"I don't know why," he said seriously. "You look beautiful and a women with curves is sexy. And like I always say, thighs save lives. What you just happen to do. But seriously I think you look amazing,"

Olivia giggled an un-Benson like, cute, low pitched giggle and blushed. She hadn't been complemented in a really long time and now she felt more beautiful than ever. She was soon recovering from the Lewis event and she had started to regain her sex drive. And that's one thing Olivia Benson lived, to be pleased.

When Olivia was with Brian, they had tried to have sex a few times but Olivia could never even get naked in front of him anymore. Brian continued to tell her he loved her body and she still looked beautiful and he sometimes he would even kiss some of the scars on her body to comfort her.

She even missed Brian. With the late nights they barely saw each other but when they did he always did what he could to please her. Cook (even though his cooking wasn't very good), cuddle with her, and he would even massage her aching feet sometimes after a long chase at work.

But she always had kept her walls up. She did that a lot and she wondered if that was a good thing or a bad thing. The only reason Olivia felt okay with moving in with Brian was because she wanted to get away from all memories of Lewis. But she still enjoyed being with Brian and loved him.

"Well that was good," Olivia said as she popped her last fry into her mouth, completely cleaning her plate.

"I told you it would be," Dean smiled. "Now I'll take you home,"

"No I think I'll just walk," Olivia said. "I need to think,"

"Olivia it's dark outside and it's New York," Dean said. "Those two things are definitely not good together. Let me take you home."

"I'll be okay, Dean," Olivia said. "I have a gun and I know jujitsu. Ill be okay and ill be watchful,"

"You promise?" Dean asked.

"Yes," Olivia bent down and kisses Dean on his soft cheek before walking out of the restaurant and outside to the dark.

She sipped up her coat and started to walk down the street and she turned the corner. She had been walking for a while and realized a car was following her. Olivia gripped her hip, ready to fire and when she glanced behind her, she gave a sigh of annoyance and relief when she saw it was only Dean following her in his car.

She was actually grateful that he was watching over her and smiled as she continued to walk, relieved she had a handsome FBI agent watching over her.

As she continued, someone suddenly bumped into her and the man quickly gently held her arm to keep her from falling.

"Olivia?"she soon recognized that smooth sexy voice and gasped.

"David?"she asked. She looked at him and blushed as he smirked at her.

"It been a long time Olivia. And I miss you to death,"he said softly. "Want to walk together?"

He held up his arm and she slowly wrapped her own around it.

Authors Note:

Okay, so there will be more of past men who come into Liv's life to regain her love. Ex: Brian, Bayard Ellis, Trevor Langdon, Marshal Anderson, etc. I haven't decided which one she ends up with though throughout this long story.