Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter J.K Rowling does.
Summery: After killing Voldemort Harry Potter flees to the muggle world with guilt and self-loathing. On the verge of taking his own life Harry is found by none other than Theodore Nott, a spy for the light during the war. Theo's obsession with fixing pretty things draws him to Harry with longing to mend Potters wing so he can fly again.
Warnings: Slightly SLASH (nothing graphic), self harm, suicidal thoughts.
Soulless Skylark
Chapter 1: Broken Bird
The rain fell. Dotted patterns were painted along the tread-worn path. The birds incessant chirping above raised to a high pitched, harmonic, staccato tune. And yet the boy still sat there feet, bare and muddy, engulfed in water, tentacles of brown reaching out in the clear pond, searching for something to grip on to. The swirling ebony hair, now plastered against his shoulders with rain, contrasting to the pale skin that covered the high cheek bones of his face and long length of his neck. Despite the boys slumped defeated shoulders, his head tilted upwards as droplets slandered the hard ground, to gaze at the gloomy, depressive stretch of grey ahead, revealing startling emerald eyes and rosy lips that parted softly to catch the falling nectar. The pond was now a decorative piece of swirling ripples.
It had been a rough day. I got up late, the nightmares keeping me up until nearly dawn before the quieted down to allow me some sleep. It just made it harder to get up, to face the world, to face the guilt.
This was all the man behind the bush saw at first glance, but upon looking closer he noticed the sunken cheeks and far too thin waist of the lad, as well as the desolate, haunting look lingering fiercely within the vibrant green eyes. Clothes swamped his small frame, though glasses no longer resided on his face. Broken. The man realised. The boy was broken. He came off as rather plain; another face in the endless crowd. He had a kind of simplistic, yet elegant, beauty. Something that one would not notice unless peering upon the creature for a great length of time.
A Skylark. This was the conclusion the tall male came to. Harry Potter is a Skylark.
Skylarks are small, brown, common birds. Always over looked and not appreciated for their timeless grace and splendour; and this seemed the perfect description for how Harry Potter looked at this exact moment.
The sheet had slipped from the mirror this morning, I covered it up quickly but not before catching sight of my sickly pale and gaunt face, the ugly scar bright red and mocking me. Lifeless green eyes filled with horror.
Theodore Nott had always liked pretty things and Potter most definitely fell into the category of pretty, if not beautiful and exquisite. Theo, as he liked to be called, was always there, just watching Harry and his 'so-called friends'. He had watched how after 7 years of friendship they had deserted him when he needed them most. It had been after the final excruciating battle, Theo was injured by his own father once it was revealed he was a 'light' spy and was in St. Mungo's recovering when he heard raised voices from further down the ward.
"What? I can't stay at the burrow anymore?" The voice was unmistakably his pretty obsession.
"Yeah, sorry mate, it's just very crowded with Percy, Charlie, Bill and a pregnant Fleur moving back in, you know? I'm sure you can buy an apartment somewhere, or someone will let you move in 'cause you're bloody Harry Potter and all that."
A tenacious voice answered, "Yeah, I guess."
"Knew you'd understand, see you around." Were Ron Weasley's parting words boomed across the ward as he strolled with his girlfriend towards the door.
"Goodbye Harry." Granger and Weasley then left hand in hand.
The bare cabinets in my room only succeeded to remind me how alone I was. Everyone hated me now; they might have tried to hide it but the disgust in their eyes in my presence was blindingly obvious and horrifically painful.
It never seemed to be the same with the Golden Trio after that. Ron and Hermione appeared to simply fade from Harry's troubled life. They were never seen together just a month after the battle, the newly engaged couple were too wrapped up in each other and there was constantly an excuse for them not to visit Potter who was put under mental investigation to assure his sanity after murdering Voldemort. There was even a rumour that he just barely just got off being called a danger to the public and himself.
Maybe I am mad. Perhaps there is something wrong with me. Something irreversible and permanent. I couldn't bare the silence of my room so I headed to the pond near the park for something to do. I realised my mistake as I gazed at my reflection in the water. But it then started raining, distorting the picture, so it was alright.
And here he was, 6 months later in a pretty much desolated muggle area. Theodore had been searching for him for weeks before finding out that the clever wizard had registered for an apartment under the name 'James Evans' just outside the small village of Little Hangleton. His father having been a Death Eater Theo had done the research and was astonished when he realised this was near the location of Voldemort's deceased father home. Why would Potter ever choose to live there? But then he had the epiphany that of course Potter would choose this place. It was pretty much close to the last place anyone would look, if they even did want to find him. But if you were looking hard enough, like Theo was, it is possible.
The rain was cold and hard. Just how I like it. The chill burrowed under my skin until I was nearly shaking, but I stayed still, it's not like I deserve anything else.
Now, why would Theo want to find Harry Potter in the first place? If it weren't for his love of beautiful people there were no links between the two. However, Theo had a certain addiction for fixing things, whether they were objects or people, and his goal for the last few months were quite simply: to fix Harry Potter. Theo really did love a challenge.
With no distractions my mind could not help but spin round in endless circles like a broken record. You're a freak, nobody loves you, they all left… You're a freak, nobody loves you, they all left…
Potter and Theo had never really ever spoken, so it was with apprehension the taller man approached him with careful, well placed footsteps that were soft but still alerted Harry to his presence. It was obvious when Potter realised he wasn't alone. His shoulders tensed and he withdrew his feet from the pond before curling up into a tight ball as if afraid Theo might attack him. He didn't turn around.
Footsteps. I hoped it was just a random passerby.
"Potter." Said Theo quietly. "Are you alright?" Came his kind question.
Twisting his head, Potter came to gaze upon Theo's 6'2 lightly toned body with sturdy limbs. Green eyes met the gold of the kempt brunette with wavering hesitation.
"Nott?" Potter asked in disbelief.
What was he doing here? Nobody is supposed to find me here; it's supposed to be safe, away from other people. All that hard work on legalised document s is ruined if Nott tells anyone were I am. They'll find me again and make me their poster boy. The representation of every pure and light when I am anything but.
"Theo, please, may I call you Harry?"
The Saviour nodded hazily. "I'm fine." The words were so resoundingly hollow, obviously from being repeated many times. "What are you doing here, Nott? I mean, Theo?" He tacked on at the raised eyebrow.
"I'm here looking for you actually. I'd hoped we could become acquainted. The war is finally over and I can express myself how I like, as well as strike up a friendship with you."
How can I trust him? I can never trust anyone again. Trust is only there to be broken and betray people. My 'friends' taught me that lesson when they all left.
"How did you find me?" Harry blurted out. "I made it almost impossible; I don't want any contact with the wizarding word anymore. I don't need to feel even more guilty and used. I refuse to." The defiant glare from the petit, distressed wizard was oddly endearing to Theo and made him smile despite of the situation and depressing circumstances. "Did you come find me to laugh at me? To spit on my face? Or to ask me questions about how great it was to KILL someone? It didn't matter that it was the Dark Lord. It was still a person. An alive, living breathing person, no matter how evil they are." Potters eyes burned with a raging passion whilst speaking, it seemed like he'd never confessed this before. Then Harry remembered who he was talking too and blushed lightly. "Sorry, I shouldn't be saying these things, I'm sorry, so sorry- please-"
"No Harry. I'm sorry. No-one should have been put through those things, especially a 17 year old boy! And that's why I'm here. I want to help you Harry. Please, just give me the chance to help you, it will get better. I promise." Theo pressed.
The genuine honesty in his gold eyes forced me to believe him. I felt myself drawn towards him, helpless to do anything else. I heard myself agreeing somewhat unwillingly to his words. And all the time I'm afraid I'm setting myself up for an even larger fall.
"Okay." And it was with that simple word Theodore Nott took Harry's Potters hand and helped him to his feet. They walked in the heavy rain to Harry's apartment and whilst gazing at the beautiful Skylark Theo swore to himself that he would mend this broken bird's wing and help him fly again.
A/N: This will be slow on updates due to the rough time at home I'm having but I feel letting my feelings out through this story will be good for me. It will be kept short but I hope you enjoy it. Until Next time.
Soulless Skylark x