The thumping of her heart he felt as he lay against her chest. Pressing his nose against her soft curls he could smell the faint smell of her shampoo. A grin escapes her lips, she is entranced by him.
Without thought, she presses herself closer to him, and he takes her in his arms, as she nuzzles against his bare chest.
"I'm with you," he whispers, and she smiles again.
Without a word, she kisses him, pressing her lips against his. Parting, she grins, and once again she buries her head against his chest, closing her eyes. He continues to hold her, his arms around her waist.
She looks up at him, smiles warmly.
"I love you, Ben," she says to him, stroking his cheek lightly. Leaning in, she kissed him against his stubble.
"Love ya too, Ruthie," he says, returning the kiss. Ben had to admit, it felt good. It felt right to him. Nothing was going to stop him now.
He wanted her. Every night, just holding her wasn't enough to him, didn't satisfy his urge enough.
Ruthie had told him they should wait; wait until the time was right. He agreed, not wanting to move too fast. Neither did she it seemed, or if she did, she didn't want him to think less of her. At most, they held each other at night. It was getting to the point now where he was ready to take it further. The question was, was she?
"Ruthie?" Ben whispered softly, his voice quivering just a tad. He hoped she thought the same way he did. She looked up at him, smiling.
"Yes?"
"Are you…ready to go to the next step?" Ben looked at her, a nervous look on his face. She looked at him, and then grinned.
"Well, boy! I thought you'd never ask. Honestly, sweetheart, I've been wantin' it for a while. I wanted to wait for you, of course." Sighing in relief, he smiled.
"I didn't want you to think less of me." Ruthie said, twirling a stray curl within her finger.
Ben kissed her gently against her forehead. "I never would think that way—I'm glad we waited, y'know…waited to see if it was even worth it.
She smiled and pressed herself closer to him, her breasts pressing up against him. It got him hard just feeling her against him. It had been a while since the ill-fated sexual encounter between them. He knew she was good in bed, but it took him months to trust her again and see her the way she saw him. Ruthie loved him, more than she had any other man. Samson once told him that to "consider hisself special, 'cause Ruthie hadn't been this way in years."
Since Hack Scudder, she hadn't fallen that hard. Ruthie tried to gather his attention, which kept failing. She worried she was losing her looks. Then one day, she thought she had him, but he slipped her grip.
Now she had him, and this time she hoped she'd still have him.
He scoots up on the pillow, and she arches her back, slowly crawling up on top of him. She sprawls her legs out, stretches them, and then wrapped them around his waist. Pressing him closer to her, she smiles, and slowly unbuttons the buttons on her nightgown exposing her cleavage. A smile forms on his face, and he slips one shoulder of her nightgown off of her shoulder, exposing her bare shoulder, then the other shoulder. Exposing the tops of her breasts, he slowly starts by touching the tops, then to slip his hand underneath, cupping the left breast gently. A gasp escapes her lips, and he smiles, leaning in to kiss her against the nape of her neck. Fervently, he kisses the area, which is her favorite spot, and she grins.
"You know me all too well."
He smiles, and continues, as she moans softly. His hand reaches down, grabbing her thigh, caressing it gently. She sighs as his fingers lightly touch her flesh, stimulating her coral pink nipples with a circular motion. Slowly his hands reach underneath the roundness of her breasts. Cupping them with a light grasp, he smiled and she gasped at his mere touch. She leans over him, her engorging breasts dangling freely over him. He gently pushes her against the pillow, smiling. Pulling the covers over their stark naked bodies, they snuggled closely together, an attempt to keep warm.
"Mighty chilly tonite, ain't it?" Ruthie whispered. Ben nodded.
"Yeah. And that damn heater won't turn on…piece of crap…" he muttered. Winter would be coming soon, and he could only hope the heater would work. Maybe he'd get Jonesy or Stumpy to have a look. Ben sighed.
"Oh well. We have each other to keep warm for now."
Ruthie smiled. "I agree. We also have lots of blankets and heavy coats. We'll make do."
He chuckled softly at her idea. "I know we will." Sharing a kiss, Ruthie then snuggled against his shoulder and closed her eyes. The quicker she closed her eyes, a loud bang was heard from outside. Jolting up, Ruthie shook, terrified of the loud noise. Pulling up the covers, she attempted to cover her naked breasts. Ben pulled back the curtains, peering out the window.
"Oh god…somethin' is wrong. I should go check it out." Proceeding to get up, he turned back to look at a worried Ruthie.
"Somethin' for sure went down. I'm gonna go check it out. Stay here." Lightly, he leaned in to kiss his wife, and then rushed out the door. She got up, threw a bathrobe over her nakedness, and peered out the window in the darkness. Gabe still snoozed away in the bedroom that Ruthie and Ben had the men build so the newlyweds would have their privacy. Ruthie remembered that Gabe was a deep sleeper, slept through most anything.
A short while later, Ben returned, finding Ruthie, clad in her bathrobe, sitting on the edge of their bed.
"What happened?"
Ben sighed.
"A scuffle between Jonesy an' Burley…Burley's threatnin' to leave." Ruthie shrugged.
"Ben-that sonofabitch has been saying that for years, and yet still comes a crawlin' back to Samson."
Leaning in, he smiled as he kissed Ruthie against her forehead.
"I figured that much."
Just as he spoke, a knock came on their door. Ben got up and opened the door.
Libby stood there, scared.
"Ben…is Ruthie there?" Looking at her, he nodded.
"Yeah, she's awake. What's wrong, Lib?"
The young woman stood there, twisting a blond curl nervously.
"Ben-Jonesy's hurt pretty bad, Burley beat 'im pretty good." Ruthie at the moment she heard Libby, she covered her mouth, shocked.
"Do they-do they think he'll be okay?" Ben stammered; he was worried for Libby.
Libby sighed. "He should, but he asked for you."
Standing there, mouth gaping open, Ben looked at Libby, shocked.
"Why would he want me?"
Ruthie turned to her husband, glaring at him. "Jonesy wants your gift, that's what it's all about."
Sighing, Ben looked at his wife. Then he looked at Libby. Finally, he caved.
"Oh…alright." Throwing on a coat, he followed Libby to the trailer. Opening the door, he found Jonesy, sprawled out on the large bed he and Libby shared. Ben sat next to his injured friend on one end, Libby on the other.
"Jonesy…wake up baby, Ben's here." Jonesy moaned softly, and his eyes fluttered open to find Ben.
"Ben…" he said, weak from the blow to his windpipe he suffered earlier. Ben tried to silence him.
"Quiet, don't try to speak too much." Ben motioned to Libby, and whispered to her to leave the room. When he used his "gift" as Ruthie affectionately called it, it took from something else to give to the person Ben was healing. He wanted Libby safe. Quickly, she hustled out of the room, hastily telling Ben she was going to see Ruthie. Nodding Ben waved to her, and then turned to Jonesy.
"Okay, we're going to try and heal some of these wounds."
Libby rushed back to the trailer Ben and Ruthie shared, only to find Ruthie sitting at her makeup table, staring off into deep abyss.
"Ruthie?" she calls out, trying to get the older woman's attention. Startled, Ruthie jumps a little, and turns to find Libby staring at her.
"Why hello, sweetheart? Is everything goin' alright with Ben?"
Ruthie always worried about Ben. The boy seldom slept for long periods of time, except for after they've had sex. Insomnia racked both of them greatly, robbing them both of precious hours of sleep. They always seemed to find comfort in each other's arms, holding each other in the blackest of night, with only the glow of a full moon outside. Ruthie still had her visions, Ben his nightmares. She always joked with him that they were a 'two of a kind'. She brought out the best in him, and he brought out a side of her that the carnies seldom had seen in over twenty years.
They'd have married over a year and a half ago, Samson and Jonesy were Ben's best men, and Libby and her ma Rita Sue were Ruthie's bridesmaids. Gabe, her only son with an unnamed father, that was because Ruthie never told a soul who his father was, was the ring bearer.
No other children have come out of their union, as Ruthie perceived she was much too old to bear a child again, and Ben, well, he was worried about passing on the 'gift' to any children.
For the wedding, the men wore nice clothes, the nicest they had, and the women all wore dresses.
Ruthie, who was the bride, did not wear white at all. She made it clear that she wasn't going to wear white, simply because, "only the purest wear white." They were married by cousins of Stumpy's who happened to be ordained ministers. Stumpy had managed to contact them when he learned that they needed a minister to marry them, without question.
It was a beautiful, yet simple ceremony, in which the two exchanged rings and kissed as the carnies cheered…well, all except Lila.
…and that was because Lila couldn't shut her mouth during the early part of the wedding, and Ruthie nearly clobbered her. If it wasn't for Ben, Ruthie probably would have jumped her. Lila had some issues with Ben stemming back from when she was with Lodz, the blind mentalist. She was angry at him for killing Lodz.
…but, Ruthie wouldn't have been his wife if it wasn't for that. Lodz was the one, who attempted to kill Ruthie with a snake bite, and ultimately, he failed and his former lover was taking it out on Ruthie's new husband.
Samson, sick of Lila's mouth running, told her to "can it." Ruthie silently mouthed a thank you to him, and the service went on without any more problems, just Lila sulking in a corner.
Cut to a year and a half later, they were still happily married, and very much in love. Ruthie and Libby developed an even stronger bond than before, as Ruthie saw a lot of Libby in herself.
"…he's doin' the healin' isn't he?" Ruthie sat at the table, a worried look on her face. She worried for Libby.
"Yes ma'am." Libby said, then paused a minute.
"…can I tell you somethin' Ruthie, and you have to not tell Jonesy…Ben, he knows."
Ruthie looked at the young woman, startled by the fact Ben knew something she didn't. Libby shrugged and looked at the older woman, sighing.
"He knows, because he figured it out on his own. Ruthie, I'm pregnant."
Looking at Libby, she smiled.
"Congrats! That's great news-but, why haven't you told Jonesy?" the younger woman looked at Ruthie, shrugging.
"He's been too worried about the money. Economy's been not too good."
Ruthie nodded. "Ben too."
"As long as we're sharin' can I tell you somethin', and you have to promise not to tell Ben, or anyone. Not yet at least."
Libby smiled.
"You can tell me!" Ruthie laughed, and continued.
"I seem to think I may be pregnant." Libby looked at her, not with shock or anything.
"How, is it even possible, I thought you were too old to bear any more children?"
Ruthie sighed. "I seem to think it was that night a while back. Lately, I've been not feeling too good, and horribly exhausted."
Libby nodded. "That's exactly how I felt!"
Ruthie put a hand to her mouth. "Look we have to keep this quiet. If Ben learns he might-and I mean MIGHT be a father, he'll flip.
Just as she finished her train of thought, Ben entered the room, and Ruthie silenced herself.
Ben enters the room, a smile on his face. He leans in to kiss Ruthie, and she smiled.
"Are you okay, Ruthie? You don' look too well." She sighed.
"I think it could possibly be exhaustion. Been workin' a lot of hours lately."
He nods, and sits down next to her.
"Same. But we do need the money."
Ruthie nods. " So what's on for tonite?"
Ben sighed. " I have work, an' you?"
Ruthie smiles," Lib's working for me tonight. How long do you think you'd be working for."
"Closing," he says, placing his hand on her thigh. He caresses it gently, and she smiles.
Looking at his watch, he realized he was late.
"Oh shoot! I've got to go." He quikly kisses her.
"Love ya. See you after work." He rushes out, and ruthie sits there for a moment,then she runs to throw up.
Muttering under her breath, she says,"I hate morning sickness."
Ruthie couldn't believe what was happening.
It had been twenty some odd years since she was with child, and then here she was again, ruling pregnancy as a possible reason for the fact that she was having a difficult time keeping food down. Ruthie wondered why she felt different. Somethin' didn't feel right to her.
Her appetite was diminished; she had barely eaten three square meals a day without getting sick.
Eying herself in the mirror, she noticed she looked worn...and not only that, she seemed to have been gaining weight in her midsection, or something else.
"Please God, don't let this be serious." Ruthie lamented to herself. She knew she needed to get to a doctor, but the question was, who would take her, and where was the nearest doctor. They were located in desolate areas, so chances of finding doctors were slim. She couldn't tell Ben; he'd be none too pleased if it did turn out that she was pregnant. He feared that any children he'd have would inherit his gift.
Well, that's what Ruthie thought of it as. She was saved by "the gift" twice. He, on the other hand, saw it more as a curse, and insisted that they use condoms.
Placing a hand on her belly, she knew she couldn't tell Ben...at least, not yet.
Ruthie went to the person she trusted most, Samson. He was there for her on many occasions. She found him sitting outside his trailer.
"Mornin' Ruthie...how are you this fine mornin'?" Samson said cheerfully. Ruthie smiled.
"Hangin' in there...Samson, can I ask you somethin'...if you promise not to let it slip to Ben?" The man looked up at her, a bit confused.
"Somethin' wrong, Ruthie? You don't look well." He motioned to her to sit down, and she sat across from him.
"Samson, I seem to think I may be pregnant again." He looked at her with utter disbelief.
"I thought you were past menopause."
"I thought so too. How would I break it to Ben? He's always goin' on an' on about how he can't have a child...I don't want him upset." Samson thought for a moment, and replied. He knew Ben would not be too pleased if he learned that his wife somehow may have gotten pregnant.
"You do know birth control is not always reliable." he noted, and she nodded in agreement.
"I know, but how am I going to tell him, Samson-he's not gonna be pleased."
"Tell you what. I'll find you a doctor, we'll get you checked over, and if it's what you think it is, then we'll discuss how to tell Hawkins."
Ruthie smiled. "I knew I could count on you...now don't tell Ben, please."
Samson smiled. "Agreed."
Ruthie got up, thanking Samson, and headed out of the trailer, beaming. Heading back to hers and Ben's trailer, she prayed quietly, hoping that it was a baby.
The first people she told, naturally, were Libby and Rita Sue.
"…you have to promise not to tell him. He'll be none too pleased." Rita Sue and Libby shook their heads, smiling.
"The boy will come to eventually, if he does get mad." Rita Sue reassured Ruthie. "I'd say, this probably has to be the first man you've been with who's been trying to abstain as much as possible." Ruthie laughed.
"Yep. But I love 'im none the less. At least we didn't rush into things."
Rita Sue smiled. "Yeah."
Libby rested her hand against her belly. She was two months behind Ruthie, but the dress Libby chose emphasized her pregnancy quite well.
"Do you know if you're having a boy or girl?"
Ruthie smiled. "Nope. Once Ben learns, he'll want a boy I bet!"
Rita Sue laughed. "Hon, every man does." They all laughed.
After some frantic searching, Samson finally came across a doctor. He asked the doctor to check on Ruthie, to which the doctor agreed happily. When Ruthie learned of the news that Samson found a doctor, she was excited. It had taken weeks of perusing through a phone book and making calls for Samson to find someone. Ruthie didn't know how much longer she could keep this all from Ben, as she was starting to show.
As she headed to the trailer to meet the doctor, she placed a hand on her belly, whispering softly to herself, "I hope you're a baby." At that moment, she felt a faint flutter against her palm.
Smiling, she seemed to know, but she decided that she still must see a doctor, to confirm her suspicion. Entering the room, Samson stood there, and next to him was the doctor. He introduced himself to her, smiling.
"You must be Ruthie. Samson's told me you're suspectin' that you may be pregnant." She nodded.
"Yes." He motioned for her to sit on the cot that Samson found to use as a table of sorts. Checking her vitals, he wrote some notes down.
"You're pretty healthy; I say...nothin' I can see from here so far." Samson pulled out a package of smokes.
"Ruthie, I'm going out to have a smoke...so's you know. I'll be sittin' outside...won't let Ben near if he comes around."
Ruthie nodded."Just make up somethin' if he does...but I doubt it. He and Jonesy are in town today." She lay down on the cot, sighing.
The doctor lifted her blouse, feeling her stomach gently, to make sure there wasn't a tumor. He took down a few notes, and then spoke.
"Doesn't feel like a tumor to me. I felt something else." Ruthie sighed.
"I felt somethin' on my way here, it felt faint though..." He nodded, and then said, "We'll give you a test to confirm if it could be a pregnancy. At your age, that's pretty rare."
The doctor took some samples, and then told her, "It will be a few days, so I suggest you come by the clinic. If it is indeed a pregnancy, who might the pop be?"
Ruthie sighed. "Ben's his name...but I haven't told 'im yet. Boy's a bit skittish about me carryin' a child." At that moment, Samson reentered the room.
"Well, what is going on here?" The doctor looked at Ruthie, and she nodded her approval.
"Samson, we think Ruthie might be pregnant...so's we're going to test to find out." The man nodded. The doctor packed up his things and headed out the door. Ruthie turned to face Samson, a look of worry.
"Samson, what do I do? I can't keep lyin' to Ben-he's gonna notice soon enough."
The gentle man placed a hand on Ruthie's shoulder.
"Ruthie, don't fret...I'm sure Hawkins is reasonable." She scoffed.
"Doubt it. Last time I discussed children with him, he left before I could explain. He's too worried about my age, and his healin' powers bein' passed on to a child." Samson nodded.
"You're healthy as an ox...and second, we don't know if his gift is genetic..." Ruthie sighed.
"Hack had powers like his, and he's Ben's pa. Could it be that Ben fears a son would bear his powers, simply 'cause it's a boy like he?"
"It's possible, Ruthie."
Placing her hand, stretching her fingers around the roundness of her belly, she sighed again.
"Well, we won't know 'til you come, won't we, my child?"
She didn't know how to tell him the news that she was with child. Ruthie knew how Ben was about children. It wasn't that he hated them; he just feared passing his abilities as a healer to any child he may have. It was such a burden on a child, Ruthie admitted, but she thought of the chance that maybe this child might not have inherited it. She wasn't born with these gifts, so that increased the chance that maybe the child might be like her…normal.
Sighing, Ruthie looked up at Ben, trying to keep as calm as possible.
"Ben, I have something I want you to know." Taking a deep breath, she calmly continued her train of thought.
"Now, I know you might not like this, but I've gotta tell you. Ben, I'm pregnant." The young man sat there in silence.
He couldn't believe what he had just heard. They had taken care to avoid pregnancy, and not only that, he thought Ruthie was past menopause. He thought she was simply too old to bear more children, and was satisfied with just Gabriel.
"Ruth, I can't believe what I'm hearing. Is it true? I thought you—"
She knew what he was going to say. He was going to say she was too old to bear more children. Ben was definitely peeved because his attempts at birth control failed. She decided to remain calm, and not jump to conclusions.
"You thought I was too old to bear a child. I thought so too." She sighed.
"Ruthie, what if our unborn child inherits my powers? The child's gonna be shunned, shunned like I was."
"He or she will be loved, there's no question in that." Ruthie said firmly. Ben had to agree there. He wasn't going to be like his pa...he didn't want to be like his pa. And even if any child of his did inherit any of his healin' powers, he was going to love them.
Love them unlike his ma did. He knew Ruthie would be a good ma. After all, he looked to how she raised Gabriel. Any child of theirs was going to be loved.
"I guess it won't be so bad, but let's take this news one day at a time, you hear? I gotta get used to the idea of possibly bein' a pa." She smiled.
"You wanna meet our baby?" To which he happily obliged.
She reached for his hand, and placed it on her belly.
Ben smiled as she guided him across the small swell, noticing the glow of excitement. Lovingly patting it, he scooted her into his lap.
"I could just take you here right now." She giggled softly as he kissed her against her soft cheek.
"This is nice." Ruthie mused. She buried her head in his shoulder.
"Sure is." Ben smiled. It wasn't every day that they got a moment alone, but he enjoyed every minute he had with her.
"Please be careful, promise me you will…I love you."
Ruthie kissed him, her hand touching his cheek. She hoped he wouldn't be gone for too long; after all, he would soon be a father. When she told Ben she was pregnant, at first he flipped. Ben was nervous because he feared any child that was biologically his would inherit his "gift".
"I promise, Ruthie. You have my word," Ben said, hugging her close. He didn't want to leave for too long either. Soon enough, he'd be a father. Those words were foreign to his lips. Ben recalled when Ruthie broke the news, he was worried. Eventually though, he grew used to it.
Ben would not be like his pa was. He made that promise a few months back, hoping to stick to it.
"I'll only be gone a month, Ruthie. An' after that, we'll have plenty of time together before the baby comes."
Ruthie smiled at the thought. Placing her hand against her belly, she looked up at Ben.
"Ben, won't you hold me, hold me one last time?" Nodding, Ben obliged. Any excuse cuddling Ruthie he took advantage of. Not only that, he was going to be away for a little while, he and Jonesy. They wouldn't be bringing Libby or Ruthie with them. So any excuse, he took advantage. Sliding his arms around her waist gently, she smiled. Ruthie took his hands and placed his palms on her small swell. Pressing his nose against her hair, he could smell the sweet smell of the soap waft from her curls. He then moved to the nape of her neck, pushing back the ringlets to kiss her against her neck.
Humming softly, Ruthie smiled.
"You know what I like," she murmured, a sly smile on her face. Slowly, he pushed up her blouse, allowing himself contact with her skin. He pushed the blouse up over her small bump, and leaned in to kiss the swell gently. Slowly and carefully, he brushed a few kisses against it, as he let his palm rest underneath the small swell. Lovingly, he rubbed the side gently with his palm. Then once again, he kissed it.
"I'm gonna miss this." Ben lamented. He wished he didn't have to leave her alone for this long, but he knew Ruthie would be fine.
Their child would be fine.
He took her hand in his, looking into her eyes.
"Ruthie, make love to me. Please." He pleaded, big blue eyes sparkling with childlike excitement. She smiled, and squeezed his hand gently. Leading him to the four poster feathered bed, he laid himself down, as Ruthie arched herself, climbing slowly on top of him.
Ben helped her remove her blouse, casting it aside. Running his fingers across her belly, he relished in the fact that he would be a father. Reaching for his hand, Ruthie grabbed it, placing it in the middle. Smiling, he patted it affectionately.
"May I…" he started to ask. Ruthie somehow knew what he wanted and nodded. Lightly, he kissed the side of her belly, then patted it again.
"This baby's surely loved." They leaned in, kissing each other on the lips. Smiling, Ben cupped her swollen breast gently. Ruthie moaned softly, as his other hand reached below. She cried out, and Ben smiled, rubbing her belly gently.
Ruthie smiled.
Ben took out a bottle of oil, her favorite, lavender. Carefully, he poured a small amount of the oil across her belly. Rubbing her belly gently, his hands made their way around the small bump. His fingers traced light circles and she smiled as he cupped the small swell with his palm, rubbing the underside of the belly with the tips of his fingers. Dabbing some more oil on his palms, he continued the loving act, cupping the small swell in his hands, as they sat up in bed while he continued rubbing her belly. Finally, he patted it once again, and leaned in, talking to his unborn child.
"Daddy loves you, don't you forget that." Ruthie's eyes welled up, and she looked at him.
"Thank you," she mouthed. Ben nodded, and pressed his lips against hers.
Ben was nervous. He was new to the fatherhood business. The only other person he knew of who had experience was Stumpy. Nothing prepared him for Ruthie's pregnancy. He thought she was too old to carry more children. By some miracle, she was pregnant again. Pregnant at almost fifty four with a husband young enough to be her son…it wasn't normal, that's for sure. Ben loved Ruthie very much though, and she loved him. The carnies told him that it was the first time in years that they saw her settle.
The first time since Hack Scudder that she was happy. Funny thing though was that Hack was Ben's pa. Ben was glad Ruthie was not his ma…they wouldn't have been able to marry if that was the case. Sitting outside with Jonesy, he pondered his life with a cigarette.
"Hard to believe I will be a pa soon…I'm not even twenty five yet." Jonesy nodded.
"Lib's expectin' too. She ain't due till winter though." Jonesy pushed a cigarette in his mouth, lighting it with a quick stroke of a match. Inhaling then exhaling, he continued.
"I don't know how we'll afford it. Lib's not working much besides helpin' Ruthie, and work's been slow for us, that's for sure." Ben nodded in agreement.
"We'll find a way, Jonesy." He took a long drag from his cigarette, then dabbed it in the ashtray. Jonesy sighed.
"Not so sure about that, Ben. Economy's taken quite the nosedive. People don't have the money like they used to." Ben agreed. People just weren't coming around as much.
"So Lib's expectin' too? (Ben was playing like he didn't know already, as a promise to Libby.) Do you know if it's a boy or girl?" Jonesy smiled. "Lib's due date is pretty close to Ruthie's I reckon. Ruthie will have given birth by the time Lib has the baby." Ben nodded.
"Yeah. Ruthie's due this fall. Doctor says it looks to be twins. Guess it's God's way of telling me that this is my only chance to be a father." Jonesy's eyes bulged.
"Twins…man, Ruthie must be over the moon with joy." Ben smiled .
"She sure is. Gabe is too." Ben sighed. He wished he could be with Ruthie right now. Holding her in his arms, kissing her against her cheek…telling her how much he loved her.
Ruthie woke up in her big four poster bed. She looked to see that she had been clutching a pillow tightly.
"Must be missin' Ben, that's for sure," she says as she looked at her pillow, then setting it down. Ben had been away almost a week, it had been hard for her to adjust. She worried daily about him, but Samson tried to calm her down by saying,"Ruthie, don't you be fretting. Hawkins will be fine…he's mighty strong for his size. Not only that, Jonesy's with 'im." At that moment, she sighed.
"I know. It's been hard for me, it's the first time he's been gone in a while…and not only that, for more than a week." Clutching her stomach, she winced.
"Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to lie down." Ruthie retreated to her bed, and lay down, closing her eyes. Turning to Lila, who was in the room, Samson mouthed, "Is she okay?"
Ruthie spoke with her eyes closed, sounding quite a bit annoyed.
"Samson, I can still hear you! You've given me quite the migraine."
The young man sat with his mother, watching her sleep. He smiled, remembering Ben had told him to watch over Ruthie, to 'take good care of her.' Now Gabe may not have been bright, but he knew how to protect his mother. Which he had done so since childhood. There had been one too many times where Ruthie had to pull him off of some weak man just because of some lewd comment the man uttered about his mother. Gabe knew every word that had been spoken about his mother, and from what he learned from Stumpy and Jonesy, they weren't the kindest words in the dictionary. He also learned a lot from Ben. In the year and a half that his ma had been married to the young man, Gabe had learned a great deal from his stepfather. He never knew his real pa. Ruthie would only tell him that the father that he did not know 'skipped town' after he was born. She never seemed to say much else, not even Ben knew much. Everything he learned, he learned from Stumpy and Samson…the only two who knew of Gabe's real pa. Ruthie never uttered a single word.
Gabe sat calmly at his mother's bed, watching for anything suspicious. He didn't want his mother, or his baby stepsister or brother hurt. Gently, he covered his ma with the covers, and she opened her eyes, a smile on her face.
"Gabe…"
It had been a few weeks since Ben had been away. Ruthie did quite well being on her own. With Gabe's help and Jonesy's, she fared pretty good. Or so she thought.
There were those days where she wasn't feeling too well, she remembered the feeling. On those days, she took it easy, retreating to the large four poster bed that she and Ben shared.
Ruthie missed him, but she knew he'd be back soon. He wanted to be with her. Lying on the bed, she closed her eyes, hoping that the feeling would pass. A familiar voice woke her; she opened her eyes to find Ben.
"You're back early," she sat up, and threw her arms around him.
"Yeah. Jonesy an' I missed you two…so's we came back early."
She showered him with kisses and he laughed.
"I missed you too." Ruthie could feel a flutter of excitement.
"They're excited too." He smiled, as he placed his hand on her belly.
"Twins?"
She laughed. "Yeah."
He smiled. Hot and sweltering, Ruthie was wishing that the fan would have been working. As she recalled with her first pregnancy, she knew that these temperatures were miserable...even more so while pregnant. She didn't bother to do much to her hair, as it would have become too frizzy and uncontrollable. Sitting in her trailer, she waited anxiously for Ben to return from his work as a roustie.
She resented not working, but in her condition, Ben and Samson deemed it not best, so Libby and Stumpy helped them out with Gabe, so he could still work. Ben also pitched in more, when he wasn't doing his duties as a roustie; he worked with Libby and Stumpy.
Placing her hand on her belly, she felt a flutter within her.
"Oh, If Ben were here..." she mused to herself. Right as she spoke, he entered the trailer, exhausted and worn. Seeing his wife made him smile.
"Hello, Ruthie."
He knew she was bored being at home, but it was for her own good. At her age, she was considered high risk.
"How you feelin'?'' he asked. Ben worried every time she was left alone.
"I'm fine, thanks for asking. Except for that darn fan bein' busted...had to crack a window open."
Ben sighed." Dammit, that's the fifth time this week." Ruthie nodded in agreement.
"Ben, our babies moved again today."
He lit up. Any talk of the twins, he was giddy with excitement. It had taken him quite a while to accept fatherhood, but he could admit she had changed…settled down. Marriage had did wonders on her,and now with her carrying their twins, Ben could admit she was gorgeous—she wore a beautiful flowing dress, her hair pulled back and clipped.
Appearing behind her, he proceeded to massage her shoulders, easing the tension.
Ruthie sighed contentedly.
"Any thoughts of a name?" he asked her.
"Not sure. It's always so hard with names."
He couldn't agree more. Kneading her shoulder blades, he hit against a knot, and Ruthie seethed in pain.
"That's good." She gritted her teeth, trying to hold in her pain.
"You're tense."
He continued down her back, his thumb and index finger making circles down her back. Ruthie sighed.
"Ben...be honest with me, are you excited to be a father soon?" She wanted to know the truth.
He took a deep breath before he answered. Taking care to not say the wrong thing, he was puzzled by her question. Even though he was confused himself, confused because he thought that at nearly fifty four, Ruthie was past the age of child bearing. At first he knew he worried because any child that was biologically his was likely to inherit his power.
"More nervous than excited."
She smiled.
"I'm nervous too, mostly 'cause I don't know if I'll have the energy, but if I can still keep up with Gabe, it's possible."
Ben nodded."An' you also have me, Gabe, an' many friends who can help."
Ruthie nodded. "True."
She paused for a moment, and then continued.
"I know this news of me expectin' your children has been difficult to take. It's taken me quite a bit to accept it myself."
Ben didn't want her to think he didn't care."It's not that I don't want or like children...love 'em, but worry that any child might end up like me. I know you are a great ma, but a child shouldn't hafta deal with such big responsibilities like bein' a healer. An' what are people gonna think?"
"No one's going to think anything, Ben. Who knows, maybe they won't inherit your powers."
At that second, Ruthie felt a sharp kick against her side. She made a face, then reached to clutch her stomach.
"Baby's strong..."
Ben felt a little guilty. He didn't want her to feel like she was alone in this pregnancy. It was likely he was like this because he never had a male influence in his life. Surely he didn't want to be like his dad was.
"I'm sorry, Ruthie. I feel awful for bein' absent. These are my children-an' I feel as if I keep on distancing myself from the fact that I will be a father."
Ruthie threw her arms around his neck.
"I know you've had it hard with your upbringing, but Ben, I think you'll be a great pa." She kissed him tenderly on the lips.
"I hope so." He laid his palm against her belly, gently massaging it.
"Thank you." Ruthie mouthed silently. She placed her hand on his, and he took her hand and squeezed it affectionately.
"Anything for my Ruthie."
"Ben, you don't know how much you bein' here means to me."
"Look Ruthie, I don't want to be like my pa was to me. The least I can do is be there." He held her in his lap, and she nuzzled against his shoulder.
"I love you." Showering him with kisses against his neck, he chuckled.
"Alright...I get it."
She smiled sweetly; taking his hand and placing it once again on her small swell. He lovingly patted it, smiling.
"I want this child to know I'm their pa." He looked at Ruthie with a grin. She smiled, and leaned in to kiss him, even slipping a little bit of tongue.
Sweeping her into a hug, Ruthie nuzzled against his shoulder.
The last few months were taking their toll on Ben.
"Rita Sue was right about the mood swings, one minute Ruthie's fine, next she's cryin'. "
Stumpy smiled. "It's those damned hormones." Ben nodded.
"You'll survive...I did."
Ben sighed, pulling out a cigarette.
"Hope so. Don't know how much more screamin' an' cryin' I can take."
Taking a drag from his cigarette, he dabbed it out in the ashtray, and sighed again.
"Gabe's so scared now, he hides in his room. I told 'im that his ma was just havin' a bad day."
At that moment, he heard Ruthie shriek. Stumpy covered his ears, the scream was quite piercing.
"Might wanna get in there, an' remember, apologize, even if it is your fault. I learned that the hard way."
Ben rushed over to the trailer, to find Ruthie standing there, with a scowl on her face.
"Where the hell have you been?"
Ben sighed. "Ruthie, honey...I was helpin' Stumpy out with an errand." At that moment, she huffed in a bit of anger.
"You were supposed to help me around here...I can't do everythin' myself. I'm the one carryin' our twins, while you go around dilly dallyin' and avoidin' the fact that you have responsibilities at home-I'm six months pregnant, god dammit."
Ben tried to usher her inside the trailer.
"C'mon Ruthie, let's discuss this inside...please?" She barricaded the door.
"No." She stood firmly at the door.
"You don't want our children, do you?" She seethed furiously. Her eyes were red from crying, and her lip trembling.
"I do Ruthie; really, I do want our child..." He said calmly.
At that moment, she crumbled. In her heart, she knew he wanted it, but all she wanted was for him to pay attention to her...just once pay attention. Last two months or so, he went right back to burying himself in his work.
"All I wanted for you was to pay attention to me."
"Ruthie, I love you. I've been tryin' to make some money so's we can make ends meet-with new mouths to feed. I want this to work."
She fell into his arms, sobbing.
"Ruthie, please don't cry. Please." He ran his hands through her hair, pressing her closer to him.
She looked up at him, and he sighed.
"I'm sorry if I haven't been there as much. Will you forgive me?"
Ruthie beamed and pressed him gently into a hug.
"Yes." she whispered softly.
"Good." Ben said, holding her in his arms. "I didn't want you to hate me." She looked up at him, confused.
"Now why would I hate you?"
"You know why. I haven't paid as much attention to you in the last two months." Ruthie touched his cheek softly.
"I don't hate you. Can we just put this behind us an' kiss an' make up?"
Expecting again surprised Ruthie. At her age, she presumed that she was too old. Ben was overly nervous, he was worried for her, and worried that any child that was his would inherit his gift.
He hardly thought of it as a gift at times. Most times he thought of it as a curse. At that moment, he pulled out a cigarette, and stuck it in his mouth, heading outside their trailer.
Grabbing his lighter from his pocket, he produced a light and lit the cigarette. Inhaling then exhaling, he looked up to see Jonesy come over to him.
"How's Ruthie? Do you know if she's alright?" Jonesy asked Ben. Ruthie's pregnancy was a surprise to most of the carnies-they assumed that she was much too old to get pregnant again.
"Doc told me a while ago she's doin' alright. Jonesy, I'm worried about Ruthie, but I do admit, she's a fighter."
Jonesy nodded. He knew Ruthie since he was a teen. At that moment, they heard a shrill cry.
Could that be his?
Had to be his. Almost five minutes later, he heard a second shrill cry.
Oh no.
Ben turned to look at Jonesy. Jonesy smiled.
"I'm guessin' Ruthie just bore you twins."
Within an hour or so, the doctor Samson requested finally came outside.
"Mr. Hawkins, you have twins, a boy an' a girl. Ruthie's anxious to see you...she's doin' quite well."
Ben dashed into the trailer to find Ruthie, with one baby in each arm.
"Ben, I've been waitin' to see you...and introduce you to our children." She gave him one of the babies, swathed in a blanket to hold.
"That would be Isabella." Ben looked down at the baby, taking noticed that she had a tuft of dark hair, the same color as Ruthie's hair. He allowed the baby to grip his finger, then handed her back to Ruthie.
"What should we name her little brother?" Ruthie grinned. Ben sat next to her on the bed, and looked at the other baby. He was bald, unlike his sister and a tiny bit smaller.
"Lucas."
Ruthie smiled.
"I like that name."
They sat there for a moment, silent, Ruthie holding Isabella, and Ben held Lucas.
"They're cute, ain't they?" Ruthie gushed.
Ben smiled. He did admit, they were cute...and they were their children.
His and Ruthie's children.
"I'm gonna lay down now, Doc says I need some rest..but I have a request."
Ben looked at her. She did look exhausted, but what did he expect? She just went through twelve hours of labor, and definitely needed to catch a few hours of shuteye.
"Yes?"
Ruthie laid down on her pillow, but then turned to face Ben.
"Don't let anyone in here, you hear? Minus you,Gabe, Lila an' the doctor...I don' want any company tonite."
She paused, then continued.
"Do I make myself clear?" Even now, she was just as strong as ever.
Ben smiled,"You have my word." He rushed to get Lila and Gabe, who soon followed him. Ruthie closed her eyes, and proceeded to take a nap.
Lila took the babies and placed them in the crib, while Ben stayed by Ruthie's side. Gabe was told by Ben to 'make sure you sit outside, so no one tries anythin' funny to put your ma in danger.'
Ruthie woke up a few hours later, finding Ben holding her. Rubbing her eyes, she smiled.
"My sweet husband…" she said groggily. Looking around, she suddenly got a worried look in her eyes.
"My babies…where are my babies?" Ben put his hand gently on her shoulder.
"Lila's got 'em." Right as he said it, Lila came over with the babies, who were swaddled in blankets. She handed one of them to Ben, which was little Isabella.
"Here's Bella…" Ben held the newborn out to her, and she took her in her arms, smiling.
"My baby girl…" She held a finger out, which Isabella promptly grabbed, her small hand clasped around Ruthie's index finger. Ben held the other newborn, Lucas.
"She looks so much like you." Ben smiled, and right as he said that, Bella started crying.
Ruthie pressed the newborn to her chest, rubbing its back.
"Hush…it's alright baby. Momma is here…" The newborn still cried, her shrill cries beginning to upset Lucas, who now began to cry. Ben pressed Lucas close to him.
Lucas quieted, and somehow Isabella did not long after. Ruthie sighed, and let the newborn rest against her chest.
"This is quite lovely," she marveled. Ben placed Lucas in Ruthie's other arm, and the newborn laid against her chest,next to his sister who was sleeping quietly.
"It sure is. I still can't believe they're ours. We make beautiful children."
"We sure do." Ruthie smiled, holding Isabella in her arms. Leaning down, she gently kissed the infant on the forehead.
Five years to the day
Isabella and Lucas were coming up on their fifth birthday. Both of them were well adjusted, well liked children. Samson quipped to Ruthie one day,"That girl of yours is like her mamma, and the boy-he's a helluva lot like his pa."
"Is that good?" Ruthie questioned. She worried about Lucas consistently, the boy was absolutely wonderful, but in some ways, she noticed his withdrawal. Isabella, was more like her in some ways.
"Ruthie, you have nothin' to worry about. They're both good kids." She smiled, looking over at the two. They were playing, and she noticed Isabella found a snake and began playing with it. Reprimanding the little girl gently, she said sternly,
"Bella, mommy don't want you playin' with snakes. Snakes ain't toys."
The small snake was luckily harmless,but still she worried, after what had occured twice in her life. Ruthie picked up the little snake, and tossed it in a box. Handing the box to Samson, she said,"Please take it somewhere and let it loose." He nodded and went to let the snake go.
Bella was very much Ruthie's spirit. Ben even noted that his daughter resembled his wife, with the dark hair, brown eyes, and the young girl even was mouthy like Ruthie. Lucas on the other hand was the complete opposite. He resembled Ben, with his sandy blonde hair and blue eyes, was quiet and shy, but very kind. The two siblings had a bond that was quite strong. Not only did they see each other as potential playmates, but Bella became the mouth for Lucas when he was unable to speak up for himself. Ruthie worried about him.
"I'm afraid Lucas won't be able to stand up for 'imself." Ben nodded.
"I know, he reminds me of myself at that age. Now Bella, she's like a miniature version of you."
Ruthie chuckled." I find it adorable how she follows me around." Ben sighed.
"Isabella is nothin' like me when I was her age. I'm more worried 'bout Lucas." She nodded in agreement.
"Could it be possible that he's the one with your powers?" She wondered if it was possible. Isabella was more outgoing and resembled Ruthie in most everything. Lucas seemed more reserved, withdrawn.
"Not neccessarily, Ruthie. Isabella could too. They both could." Ruthie sighed.
"How would we know which one?"
"We won't Ruthie...not till somethin' happens."
A cry rang from outside.
Ben looked at Ruthie, expressing their worry. At the same time they looked at each other and then said together, "Bella!" They rushed outside to find their daughter crying.
"Bella, what's th' matter?" The little girl looked up at Ben and Ruthie and said," Lucas brought Sparky to life."
Now Sparky was Bella's kitty that Samson found and gave her. The calico kitten was drowned by Lila the day before, in a desperate attempt to silence the cat's meowing. Ruthie remembered yelling at Lila when she learned of what was done. Now she was staring at her five year old son, cradling a cat in his arms. The cat was purring and meowing happily. Bella looked at her father, terrified.
"Pa, I'm a'scared." Her big brown eyes looked at him fearfully. Ben looked at Ruthie, who looked scared herself.
Ruthie didn't know what to do. Looking at their daughter, she smiled.
"Bella, honey…why don'tcha go inside while your pa and I take care of this?" Gabe, who was standing outside, took her inside. They looked at each other, then Lucas.
"Honey, what did you jus' do?" Ruthie said, trying to keep calm. She didn't want to scare her son. Recalling Ben's story of what his ma did, she didn't want to repeat history.
"Kitty was in my arms, and she woke up." Lucas said, defending what he had done. Ben looked at Ruthie, nodding.
"Well, let's let her go have some food, she's probably starvin'." Ruthie continued, trying so hard not to overreact. Lucas got up, taking Sparky with him.
"Alright, ma…" He took her inside. As soon as the little boy was inside, Ruthie turned to face Ben.
"I was right with my suspicions. Lucas must have inherited your 'gift'."
Ben paced the dirt, "We don't know if Bella will show any signs of it, but I wonder if it would be possible if she doesn't inherit it?"
Ruthie smiled. "I do know one thing Bella has inherited, and that's my love for snakes." They shared a laugh.
"Y'know, she's so much like you. "
"Sure is." They looked into each other's eyes.
"I love you." Ruthie said, laying her head against his chest. Ben pressed his lips against her forehead and she smiled.
"Love you too," he mouthed, embracing her. He held out a hand to her, and she took it willingly, as he led her inside the trailer. Over the last few years, with the help of Stumpy and Jonesy, they added on an additional bit of room for the children, and Ben and Ruthie kept the main trailer to themselves. Once inside, Ben pulled her inside their bedroom, with the large four poster bed. A smirk formed on her lips, and Ruthie shut the door, to keep the children out.
Pushing him against the wall of the trailer, she threw her arms around his neck. Tasting her lips against his, he smiled smugly, and gently pushed her on the large feather bed.
Slowly he pulled at her blouse, and she obliged, unbuttoning it to reveal her large breasts. Brushing his lips lightly against the top of each one, he slowly cupped them in his hands, exploring for himself the roundness of them. Ben allowed his hands to then run down the sides of Ruthie's thin, petite frame, exploring her voluptuous figure. He explored every curve, taking a quick taste of her.
Ruthie allowed his touch; she welcomed it with open arms. It had been a while since she had been in his arms.
He kissed her against the nape of her neck, as she moaned softly, whispering, "You know me too well."
A finger made a circular motion around her bare nipple, and she shuddered.
"Sure do." Putting a finger to his lips, she kissed him. He smiled, and held her against him. Gently, he caressed her skin with a single hand. Exploring her curves, he caressed the inside of her thigh, as she moaned softly.
"We don't seem to get these moments much, do we?" she said, pressing her lips against his. Parting for a brief moment, she smiled.
He sighed and pulled his arm around her.
"Sure don't." His hands ran through her ringlets, and Ben smiled as he kissed his wife on the forehead. Lightly, his fingers touched her cheek, and leaning in, he kissed her against her lips. Once again, they parted and Ruthie looked deep into his crystal blue eyes.
At that very moment, they heard one of the twins scream. Bolting out of the bed, and rushing to button her blouse, she looked out the window. Ben looked at her, worried.
"It's Bella, Ben. Something happened." Fixing her skirt, and blouse, she rushed to the door, then took a moment and looked back at her husband. Ruthie ran over to Ben and they hugged each other for a moment.
"Sorry to cut our time short…I'll make it up to you, I promise." She smiled, and hastily rushed out of the trailer. Ruthie ran outside only to find Bella being comforted by Gabriel.
"Wh—what happened?" Ruthie stammered. Gabriel looked up at her.
"Lucas—he done it again." Gabriel said, a bit of fear in his face. He was shaking just as much as Bella was in his arms. Ruthie looked at them both.
"What did he do now?" Her voice trembled, now she was just as fearful as Gabe and Bella were. Bella looked at her with tears running down her cheeks. Even though she was only five years old, she comprehended the nature of the incident. She had overheard her pa tell Jonesy about his 'powers' one day while playing outside with her doll.
"No." Bella said firmly, in her best adult voice. "It's those powers I hear Pa talking about."
Ruthie looked at her young daughter, and said, "You know better not to eavesdrop." Bella frowned.
"I know Ma." She hung her head down, ashamed that she knew better. Ruthie took the girl in her arms and hugged her.
"It's alright, Bella. Your pa and I wanted to wait until you guys were old enough to understand the dangers."
Bella looked up at her mother, her finger twirling one of her brown ringlets nervously.
"What dangers?"
"You'll understand when you're a bit older, Bella." Ruthie said. She regretted bringing this up…only because she knew Ben might not be too happy with her if he learned that she talked about his powers with their daughter. Bella nodded and buried herself in her mother's shoulder. Ruthie stroked the young girl's hair, in an attempt to calm her down. Motioning to Gabriel, she said,
"Gabe, take Bella on a walk or something…something to keep her mind off of all this." Gabe smiled, and held out his hand to Bella, who reluctantly took it. Ruthie waved to both of them, and shouted after them, "Now be careful, you hear?" Opening the door to their trailer, she entered, and when she got inside, sighed.
"Something wrong, Ruth?" Ben said, sitting on the bed. Ruthie retreated to the bed, and sat herself down next to Ben.
"Gabe said Lucas did it again, and Bella knows about your powers. She overheard you when you were talking to Rita Sue and Jonesy." Ben looked at her, shocked.
"Don't worry, hon…I scolded her for eavesdropping on you." Ben looked at her, a little pale.
"How-how much does she know?"
Ruthie took his hand in hers. "Enough to understand that there might be a connection to her brother and her father."
Ben sighed.
"She's just like you, Ruthie…too much sometimes." Ruthie smiled.
"I know." Ben squeezed her hand affectionately.
"How much did you say?"
Ruthie kissed his cheek. "Not a lot. I sent her off to play with Gabe to get her mind off of this all. She's still too young to know of all this." Ben nodded in agreement.
"We did the right thing by not telling them." Ruthie leaned in to kiss him again, but this time on the lips.
"Sure did. That was a close one."
"Speaking of Lucas, where is he? That boy never seems to want to come inside."
Ben laughed. "I'm guessing he could be with Samson, or he's playin' alone." Ruthie sighed.
"I take it we're alone." Ben kissed her on the lips.
"C'mon, let's enjoy this while we can." He put his arms around her waist.
Smiling, she leaned in to kiss him again. Tasting her soft lips against his, Ben could feel her against his manhood; he could even feel her hand brush up lightly against it. Ruthie reached for him, stroking it gently as he groaned in sheer pleasure of her touch.
"Rare moment we get alone, might as well enjoy it." She presses her lips against his scar, allowing her lips to brush lightly against the faded mark. Ruthie looked up at him and smiled.
At that moment, they heard the sound of the door. Quickly, they fixed themselves up.
"Later." Ruthie whispered.
Ben smiled. He'd get some time with her later, after the children were in bed.
The children were in bed, and Ruthie sat in the rocking chair that was crafted by Jonesy, reading. Never did she think at her age that she would be a mother again—to fraternal twins. Not only that, married to a man that young enough to be her son. To Ruthie, it was surreal.
Ben entered the room, fresh from a shower.
"I'm back, Ruthie. Are the children asleep?"
She looked up from the book she was reading, closing the book and setting it on the table.
"Yes. I put the twins to bed an hour ago, and Gabe just went to bed right before you had come." Ruthie stood up, and Ben put his arms around her waist, leaning in to kiss her on the lips.
"We never get much time together it seems." Ben loved his children dearly, but he wished he could have time with Ruthie more than just five minutes here, five minutes there. The closest to any intimacy between them was when he held her in his arms while they slept. It had been probably weeks, maybe months since they had made love.
Passionately, he began by kissing her against the nape of her neck. That spot was one of her weaknesses.
"That feels good," she remarked softly, as he ran his fingertips against her naked body. Her smooth skin, tan and exotic, made her seem mysterious and full of wonder. He liked that about her. She was beautiful. For being old enough to be his Ma, she did not look her age at all.
Gently, he caressed her breasts cupping them in one hand, then the other. Her smooth skin against his palms felt good. Ruthie shuddered with excitement the feeling of him against her cool flesh.
Murmuring softly, she lolled her head back enjoying the attention Ben was giving her. Whimpering when he caressed her thigh, she finally cried when he moved inward. Slowly slipping up her flesh, the light touch of his fingers tickled against her skin. Ben held her against him, the warmth of his body pressed against hers. Smiling, she nuzzled against his chest, lightly pressing her nose against his neck. Ruthie proceeded to run her tongue slowly across his chiseled abdomen, seeking to please Ben in, the way she knew best. He couldn't help but smile.
Tasting his skin, this was enough to turn her on. Lightly, she brushed her lips against the faded scar from that day that was the day.
Gently, she kissed the scar and leaned up to look at her lover.
Arching her back, she crawled on top, taking the dominant position to his much inexperienced one. As she hovered over him, her engorged breasts dangled freely above him. Lightly, he cupped one of her breasts in his hand allowing his tongue to lap a rosy areola. Ruthie shuddered and Ben continued exploring her. Ruthie, slipping a tongue down his throat, proceeded to run her nails through his mousy blonde hair as she kissed her lover passionately and with force. Slowly she peeled off his work shirt completely, and throwing it across the room, she leaned into his neck, her kisses lightly brushing against his neck affectionately.
"Babe, that feels great." Ben grinned. Ruthie looked up at him.
"I've had years of practice." She mused, and leaned in, continuing. Her hands massaged his shoulders gently as he laid flat on his back. Slowly and carefully, she ran her hands across his back.
Ben groaned.
Ruthie smiled, and continued, kneading her thumbs against the tightness in his back. Leaning in, she kissed his cheek.
"Relax, hon… you're too tense."
Sighing, Ben let her continue. Her hands felt good against his stiff body.
A smile forming on his face, Ruthie took great pleasure in seeing him enjoy her company. They did not get many moments like this.
Ruthie smiled at the sound of his pleasured moan.
"I take it you like this?" she chuckled, her hands working their way across his back.
All she got from him was a grunt…which she took as a yes. Smiling, she continued for a few moments, then paused.
"My turn." she spoke huskily, barely over a whisper. He turned around, and faced her. Ruthie swung her legs around his waist, using her strength to pull in closer to him. Ben placed his arms around her waist, and she allowed her head to rest against his shoulder.
" I really missed this."
Ben smiled.
The next morning, Ruthie was outside, hanging the clothing on the clothesline. She had just done their laundry, and was waiting for the load to dry. That was when Libby came by, her daughter May trailing behind. May was a few months or so younger than hers and Ben's twins. May reminded Ruthie of Libby's sister who passed many years earlier, Dora Mae. She knew Libby named the girl in memory of her sister. May was all of four years old, her hair dark-dark like Libby's natural hair color before she bleached it. Today, Libby had her hair done in pretty ringlets, and did May's hair to match hers. Only difference was the pretty red ribbons neatly tied in her hair. Jonesy bought his daughter those as a gift.
"Good mornin' Ruthie," Libby said, smiling. "May wanted to come over and play, so I thought I'd bring her over." Just as Libby said that, Bella burst outside.
"Hiya, May!" May smiled shyly.
"Hello, Bella." May looked down at her cherry red maryjane shoes. She looked up, grinning.
"Wanna play dollies?" Bella lit up.
"Sure! C'mon May…let's go!" she pulled May inside the trailer, as Ruthie covered her mouth to stifle her laughter.
"Oh, Bella…" Libby laughed.
"Y'know, she's a hell of a lot like you."
Ruthie smiled. "Ben says that every day." Pausing for a moment, she continued.
"How are you, Lib? Things goin' well for you an' Jonesy?"
"Sure are. You?" Libby smiled. Ruthie sometimes couldn't believe how grown up and mature Libby had become. She knew that what had happened with Jonesy's near death, which Ben eventually revealed to her, and what had occurred with Dora Mae changed Libby. Libby became a strong force, and Ruthie was proud of her. No longer did she do the shows, she aided Ruthie, Ben, their children with Gabe's show…and whatever else Ruthie wanted help with. Sometimes, Stumpy even chipped in. Rita Sue did the shows occasionally, but the show hadn't fared well since Libby left the show, so eventually she helped too, as an assistant to Ruthie. She was the one who handled the unruly crowds, and did all the shouting-on the days Ruthie was too preoccupied or wanted a break, or if Libby was busy helping Jonesy. Sometimes, May came over and Ruthie watched May, Bella, and Lucas.
One day, Ruthie babysat all three children. She loved them all, including May. Reading a book, she watched as the kids used their imagination and played inside as it was pouring like cats and dogs outside of the trailer.
"Now don't be going outside, kids…it's muddy and wet, and someone could get seriously hurt."
Picking up her newspaper sword, May swung it around. They were pretending to be pirates again.
"Miz Ruthie, could you tell us a story? Please?" May asked, looking up at Ruthie. Bella jumped off the bed that was Ben's and Ruthie's and bolted over to where her mother was, and stood next to her.
"Ma, please? I want to hear a story too…" Bella trailed off and turned to look for her brother. Spotting him over in a corner, she motioned for him to come over.
"Lukey, wanna have storytime?"
The young boy looked at his sister, then his mother.
Ruthie caved. "Alright, I'll tell you all a story. Luke, get yourself over here if you want to hear." The three young children sat themselves around Ruthie's chair, May on one end, Bella next to her, and Lucas on the other end.
Ruthie smiled.
"Well children, what is it you want to hear, Goldilocks, Jack in the Beanstalk…" Ruthie rattled off. For five whole minutes she rattled off names of stories, until finally May said something.
"Miz Ruthie…can we make up one?"
Ruthie paused naming off stories and smiled. "Well, it's worth a shot, why don't you kids come up with something and I'll help."
An evening with Ben was something Ruthie rarely ever had. Their schedules made it hard for them to get any time alone whatsoever. But tonight, Libby and Jonesy offered to take the children, allowing Ben and Ruthie to get some time alone.
"I can't believe the kids are having their first sleepover." Ruthie smiled. Ben nodded, he was excited that they got this time alone.
"I know. More time for us." He swung an arm around her waist. Ruthie smiled, and he leaned over and kissed her against her neck.
"You know what I like…" Ruthie murmured.
"Of course I do." Ben laughed heartily, as he continued to kiss her against her neck, slowly moving towards the tops of her breasts.
As he cupped them, a gasp escaped from her lips, then a look of worry.
"I'm not used to the kids bein' gone." Ruthie remarked. Ben held her close, his hand slipping up her blouse.
"Relax, babe. They'll be fine. Gabe's with them and so is Jonesy and Libby." Ben said, in between intense kisses against her soft dewy lips. Nibbling the edge of her ear lightly, he grinned.
Ruthie couldn't help but smile.
"I know." She took his hand, squeezing it gently. Ruthie loved these intimate moments with Ben. She felt his hand cup underneath her breast, and shuddered at his fingers brushing against her nipple.
It had to be the wee hours of the morning, because it was still quite dark out. Ruthie could feel Ben tossing and turning next to her. She sighed.
Once again, it was another night terror. Ruthie was unsure what to do, sometimes he wanted her, and other times he didn't. Lightly, she tapped on his shoulder.
"Ben, honey?" she whispered, and he woke, his eyes fluttering open to see her. A smile came across his face.
"Yes, Ruthie?" he said, touching her cheek lightly. She smiled, and looked at him, a bit of worry in her face.
"Are you okay, sweetheart? You were tossing quite a bit." Ben sighed.
"I'm fine, babe…really." Ruthie didn't believe him for one second. Then a second later, he said,"I'm in the mood to cuddle." Spooning up behind her, he took her in his arms, and held her tightly as he kissed her on the lips. Ruthie nuzzled against his shoulder and closed her eyes.
This was bliss.
Sometime later on, she woke up, still in his arms. A smile crossed her lips and she closed her eyes again and tried to fall asleep.
The sound of pouring rain woke Ruthie. She yawned and rolled closer to the window. Rain fell in sheets…but hell, this was fucking Florida. Wet and muggy. Ben had fans going in all directions to keep the trailer cool…and she listened to find that the children were at Jonesy's and Libby's. Ruthie had totally forgotten. Thinking to herself, she wondered if the rain would ever stop. As she was thinking, she felt a warm body press against her. Turning around, she found Ben, wide awake.
"Morning." Ruthie yawned, and leaned in to kiss Ben against his stubble.
He smiled. "Morning." she felt his arms wrap around her waist and had to smile. Some days she found it hard to believe he was her husband. At almost thirty years old, he was a good half her age almost. Some carnies razzed her for being with him, but she stopped caring what they thought after they married. What was it their business that she had a good marriage, was well settled and with a man who loved her. Who cared if he was young enough to be her son? She didn't care. Every few weeks she still dyed her hair with the help of Libby, and kept up the dark chestnut brown that Ben loved. Ruthie always said she'd rather dye her hair than let it gray. Ben didn't care, he loved her regardless. She was the mother of their two children, and he took great care to protect her as much as he could. Her and Gabe and Bella and Lucas. Taking her hands in his, he smiled.
"I love you."
She looked at him, tears forming in her eyes. Throwing her arms around his neck she embraced him and kissed him against his lips.
"Love you too, Ben." He smiled, and she rested her head against his shoulder.