My very first one shot! Really funny! REVEIW! P.S. Not offending blondes cause I am one. I am a dirty blonde.
"Yo, yo, yo!" The announcer yelled into the microphone.
"Yo, yo, yo!" The crowd echoed.
"Yo, alright, tonight on Comedy Kid. We have a bunch of comedians up tonight! ARE YOU READY!"
"YEAH!"
"Okay, here's Echo. The Echoing comedy star she is….is…..is…." Echo entered the stage and began her act. The Chipettes, Melody, Simon, Theodore, and Dave were all in the crowd waiting for Alvin's time on stage. They were at a restaurant where they shot the new T.V show Comedy Kid. Alvin was asked to be on the show. The doors opened, Angel Kastaway and her bff Charlene had come into the restaurant and sat down in the front. Angel's daddy, Mr. Kastaway owned the restaurant.
"Please welcome, the grade A of all As, Mr. Alvin Seville."
"What up people?" Alvin said. "So today we went to the mall. I asked Dave, hey Dave why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?" The crowd was silent with whispers of confusion.
"Must have heard that one." Alvin continued. "Ugh…I was in class and the teacher gave us number 2 pencils. Here's what I asked her, if number 2 pencils are so great then why are they still number 2?" The crowd was still silent. Simon began to laugh, Melody stared at him.
"You want Alvin to die of embarrassment?" Simon whispered.
"Oh yeah." Melody said with enjoyment. Alvin began to sweat,
"Ugh…….."
"Hey!" Angel screamed. "Tell better jokes." Alvin was really sweaty he began to look around the crowd and then his eyes approached Melody who was laughing so hard due to his embarrassment. Dave just sat there silent. Alvin was so angry with Melody so then it hit him.
"Hey folks, have you ever heard about the blonde and the light bulb?" The crowd started looking at Alvin.
"I mean, it has to take more than one. What I'm saying folks is, why does it take two blondes to screw in a light bulb?"
"Why?" Brittany shouted.
"One to hold the Diet Coke and one to yell DADDY!" Melody began to blush, Charlene felt insulted, and Eleanor was not looking pretty happy. The whole rest of the restaurant was laughing and chanting,
"MORE BLONDE JOKES!"
"Okay." Alvin said. "This one goes out to my blonde of a sister Melody." Melody stared at him. "The other day we were playing Black Jacks. I yelled HIT ME! SO SHE PUNCHED ME IN THE FACE!" The crowd was once again laughing. "Charlene is another blonde to add to the dumb list. What happens if she pulls the pin? RUN SHE STILL HAS THE GERNADE!" People were rolling on the floors. "Oh and Eleanor, remember you, Melody, and Charlene went to those train tracks? Melody said they look like deer tracks, Charlene said they looked like badger tracks and you went to them and said no, they look like………CRASH! Did it hurt when the train hit you?" Eleanor was steaming hot!
"Alright, who thinks Alvin should return again tonight?" the announcer said. The crowd screamed loudly. "Okay, he'll be back after our 10 minute intermission." Once the intermission started, Eleanor, Charlene, and Melody got out from their seats to Alvin's dressing room. Melody grabbed Alvin's shoulder and turned him around.
"Why hello, dumb blondes." He said with charm.
"Hey! NO MORE BLONDE JOKES!" Melody yelled.
"Yeah Alvin!" Eleanor responded.
"If you tell one more, I'll get you for it." Charlene yelled.
"Charlene, for once were on the same page." Melody said. "Now Alvin, one more blonde joke and I'm going to get revenge for it."
"COUNT US IN!" Charlene and Eleanor said. When Melody, Charlene, and Eleanor left Alvin's dressing room he said to himself,
"What are they going to do, hurt me? They wouldn't dare."
When intermission was over, Alvin returned to the stage,
"HEY FOLKS, blondes are dumb, remember their dumb. There was this blonde, brunette, and a red head, and they were stuck on this island in front of a magic mirror. The mirror could grant them one wish. The red head wished that she was smarter so she could get off the island and she built a raft and got off the island. The brunette wished she was back home. She was back in a matter of seconds. The blonde comes up to the mirror and says, I've always been dumb all my life, I wish I was smarter and she turned into a man." The crowd burst with laughter. Melody, Eleanor, and Charlene all got up. Melody raised her hand.
"Yes blonde of a sister." Alvin said.
"Alvin, could a dumb blondes like me, Charlene, and Eleanor take the microphone for one sec?"
"Ugh sure." Melody, Charlene, and Eleanor took the microphone and Melody began,
"Hey folks, I'm a dumb blonde as you know. There's one thing missing to that magic mirror on the island though."
"Really Melody?" Charlene and Eleanor sarcastically said.
"Yeah, if the blonde wished she was dumber she would turn into Alvin." The crowd was laughing so hard. "Oh and that isn't as funny as I told you about Alvin watching spaghetti. One day I was cooking spaghetti and I had to go and help Simon with this new experiment. SO I asked Alvin if he could watch the spaghetti. I go and help Si for about 30 minutes and I heard an explosion. I run with Simon to the kitchen where I find that the spaghetti had exploded. Alvin is just standing there. Simon yells you were supposed to be watching the spaghetti and Alvin replied I am." Melody then showed an imitation of a person staring cheerfully at spaghetti. The crowd roared with laughter.
"That's not all." Charlene said grabbing the microphone. "How do you confuse Alvin? Tell him to pee in the corner of a curricular room. How does he confuse you? When he says he's done." The crowd banged fist while laughing. "Oh, and there was this one day Alvin went to the library. He checked out a book and the next day, he brings it back. He said to the Liberian, this book is too hard and confusing. It has way too many characters and way too many numbers. The Liberian leans over to the other and says, Dang so that's the boy who took our phone book." More laughs from the crowd.
"Now speaking of magic mirrors." Eleanor said taking the microphone from Charlene. "There was one at this candy shop and you can't tell a lie in front of it or you get sucked in. Simon goes to the mirror and says I think I'm one of the smartest kids in the world. He didn't get sucked in. Theodore comes to the mirror and says I think I'm too fat. He got sucked in. Alvin comes to the mirror and says I think and he got sucked in." The crowd was losing their guts from laughing. "The first day my sisters and I got the Wii, the boys and Melody came over to our house. It was Alvin and I in boxing. We were already and the game said fight so he began beating me. I fell down and yelled WHAT WAS THAT FOR? It said fight. NOT LITERLALLY!" The crowd had reached its point of laughing and the announcer came out.
"Now how about these lovely ladies be on our next episode of Comedy Kid?" The announcer said.
"YEAH!" Alvin walked off the stage while hearing the clapping of the audience and he went by Theodore.
"You know Alvin." Theodore said. "This is what you get for calling a blonde dumb."
WHAT DID YOU THINK! LOL REVEIW!