A DIFFERENCE OF OPINION.
Rupert Giles finished studying the computer program on the screen in front of him removed his glasses and polished them while smiling at the young woman seated across the desk from him.
"I must say this is a masterful compendium of the various demons the Slayers are liable to meet during their careers. I only hope you haven't done all this research at the cost of your school work Dawn?"
Dawn stopped swivelling about on her chair and reassured him,
"No way, Buffy would kill me. Or cut my allowance, which is worse than death. Relax Giles, one or two assignments might have got an A instead of an A but I'm still in the top five in my year."
"I'm pleased to hear it. What about your social life? All the hours that went into this research must have meant that you spent less time with your friends?"
"Not really. I happen to be very well organised. Besides, this is my hobby and I do most of the work on it when Buffy's out of town or when the holidays start to drag on into that boring phase. So you think its okay? That the girls will find it useful?"
"Undoubtedly. So shall the Watchers, I'm certain."
"That's good. I've started a listing of each demon's method of attack and what are their most dangerous weapons, like poisoned bites and stuff. And ways of fighting them that have been effective. If it turns out alright, it should just slot into that program. It will probably be slower going though, with this next year being my final year of High School."
Giles nodded and offered,
"It's almost lunch time; would you like to go out to eat? My treat, of course."
"Great! But no Italian, please? I'm all pasta-ed out. Sometimes I dream of hamburgers and hotdogs."
She slung her back pack over one shoulder and waited for him to shrug into his coat. He was definitely getting greyer, she thought, rebuilding the Watcher Council and having so many new Slayers coming into their powers each year had made for a lot of hard work. It had taken the Council, Buffy and Faith months to come up with a workable schedule and it was left to Giles to find the extra Watchers to set things in motion. Now he asked,
"How do you feel about going to that Mexican restaurant that Buffy likes so much?"
"Ooh chilli! I haven't had chilli in ages. If there's any in Rome it's well hidden! If I haven't sniffed it out then Xander would have on one of his visits."
They chatted of inconsequential things on the way to the restaurant; the dismal London weather, the sightseeing Dawn had done in the two days she had been in London, catching up on the doings of their friends and of Giles visit to the hole that used to be Sunnydale the last time he had been in California. To Dawn's delight the waiter at the restaurant was Mexican and she took the opportunity to practise her Mexican on him. He responded to the lovely young woman by serving them the most enormous quantities of food and waving away Giles protests over the gift of a bottle of wine. As the man left them to their meal Dawn said,
"He's as homesick as I get sometimes. My Mexican is rustier than I thought, though. I'll have to practice it before I'm not totally unable to be understood. Speaking Spanish is not the same. This seafood stew is wonderful!"
Giles nodded as he spooned a mouthful of the delicious concoction into his own mouth.
They ate in silence for a while and then Giles spoke,
"I have been meaning to ask you what your plans are after you finish school next year. Have you made any decisions for your future? I would like you to give serious consideration to becoming a Watcher. You would make a very fine one; you certainly have all the necessary skills. You have a knack for learning languages; you are fast becoming an expert demonologist; you have kept up your fighting abilities and you know first hand what a Slayer needs to learn."
Dawn chewed a piece of bread thoughtfully before replying,
"That part time job I have at the bookshop will become full time after I leave school. Mr. Farelli is opening a branch in San Francisco next year and he's offered me the job of assistant manager there. I love Europe but California is home."
She hesitated before saying gently,
"Besides Giles, I really wouldn't be a good Watcher."
He was disappointed and it showed. She felt terrible for hurting him.
"What makes you so certain that you wouldn't be a good Watcher? I would like to know, just out of curiosity."
Giles asked quietly. Dawn sighed,
"To be totally honest, and this is no disrespect for you or what you do, I would feel that I was condoning something I don't agree with. You see Giles you believe that to be either a Slayer or a Watcher is a noble calling and that is how you've always treated it. But I see it as, well a form of slavery. I know that sounds harsh, but how can it be anything else when these girls don't have any option but to be a Slayer?"
She held her hand up to signal that she would listen to his protests when she had finished speaking and he sat back patiently.
Softening her tone, Dawn continued,
"They can't walk away; they can't live a normal life; even now many die in their teens and it's just so wrong that a group of men ten thousand years ago decided that this was the way it had to be. My whole family had their lives turned upside down and made unhappy. I've watched Buffy lose so much of what was important to her. Her own humanity has been compromised by the need for her to accept demonic attributes."
Hesitating a little and in a quiet voice she said,
"I've always thought that a Slayer has less free will than a vampire, at least they can pack up and leave town if the going gets too tough. As much as I love and respect you Giles, I wish Buffy had had a chance to decide on her own future."
Giles sat in silence as he tried to absorb what she was saying and he had to admit Dawn had some legitimate arguments. He asked,
"Have you talked to Buffy about how you feel?"
Dawn was horrified by the suggestion,
"No! I'd never say it to any of the girls! They need to believe that it is an honour to be called as a Slayer. If they don't see it like that then they might just give way to depression or disillusionment and maybe lessen their chances of surviving for as long as they can. This is just how I see things, my opinion, for what its worth."
He wondered what she'd say if he told her of the two girls who had committed suicide during the past year. The Russian girl Katrina had been a musical prodigy on the verge of a spectacular career and Sumila, the gentle Indian girl whose reverence for life made it intolerable for her to even think of killing; two girls who would have applauded Dawn's use of the term 'slavery'.
He admitted,
"You do make some valid points. But surely if you feel so strongly, as a Watcher you might have the resources to find a way to change things? Carry what Buffy did in destroying the 'one Slayer' rule another step?"
Dawn shrugged, smiled briefly and asked earnestly,
"You don't think all my demonology has been an end in itself? It's just a bi-product of searching for a way to change the inevitability of a Slayer having no choice in the matter. How could I become a Watcher and perhaps send a girl to her death if I don't believe in it as strongly as you do?"
He sighed, removed his glasses and began polishing them as he always did when thinking over a problem,
"I see your point. Much as I wish otherwise. As you say, I do see it as a noble cause. The Slayers have always stood between mankind and the demons. I see my role as a Watcher as being another weapon in her armoury. It is hard to send a girl to her death! But it would be even more difficult to send her into the battle without every conceivable advantage. Your intelligence, your skills and your experience would be so useful to the Slayers. Perhaps even the difference between life and death. Buffy has changed the rules and perhaps this is why you could be very influential as a Watcher?"
Dawn shook her head slightly and Giles smiled wryly,
"This rather unpalatable opinion of Slaying and Watching is shared by increasing numbers of Watchers, although they would not choose the word 'slavery'. They would welcome the very change you wish to make and they would give you strong support and every bit of help they could. Would you at least give it a little more thought? As I will give a great deal of thought to what you have said and look into ways of helping you find a way through this maze."
Dawn nodded and told him quietly,
"I will think about it but I can't see me changing my mind. I hope I haven't hurt your feelings too much Giles. There was a time when I wanted to be a Slayer so much myself, to be one of the 'special' girls. I wanted to be like Buffy but then I saw how much she wanted to be like me. Just a normal, average, everyday person and I figured out that's what it is all about; the Slayers making sure that the normal, everyday people never have to face the demons. Maybe that's the best thing I can do for Buffy, live the life she fought so hard to give me?"
She was touched when he placed his hand over one of hers and squeezed it gently.
"You may not be a Slayer and you may not want to be a Watcher but you are very 'special' indeed Dawn. So shall we agree to disagree? Who knows; perhaps if we try to meet each other half way we might just find a way to help our 'special' girls have a chance to live a more 'normal, average' life. But that's just my opinion, for what it's worth."