Beginning somewhere in the middle of the GSD TV series, this fan fiction mainly follows the relationship of Dearka Elsman and Miriallia Haw. There may be mention of Athrun & Cagalli and Kira & Lacus pairings during. I may or may not end up adding chapters to this. If I don't, the end is pretty self-explanatory.
Tapping my fingers on the rail, I watch as the Archangel approaches and proceeds to dock. By now the war has escalated into a full blown battle. Captain Ramius of the Archangel, Representative Cagalli Yula Athha and, the supposedly, real Lacus Clyne have been requesting, on many occasions, meetings of peace. They are never going to stop until the war ends. And why should they? Certainly they will realise soon that Chairman Durandal wishes for the same thing. After refusing to cease intervening in our battles against the Earth Forces the Chairman has finally decided to take them seriously. Soon they will be seeing things our way and we'll all be glad to get back to fighting for our cause. To save the Plants and restore humanity to a safer state.
I hear him approaching before he puts his hand on my shoulder and pulls me around.
"Yo, Yzak." I give him a mock salute, looking him up and down in his white uniform. The uniform of a superior. A commander none-the-less. When did he surpass me so far? It may or may not have something to do with me being court martialled for being a traitor and being downgraded to a regular ZAFT soldier. My decisions during the second battle of Jachin Due weren't well received. But hey, I'm not saying anything.
"Dearka." He grimaces at my salute and leans over the railing, taking in the sight of the Archangel. "It is still an impressive ship, even after all this time."
It hasn't really been that long, I want to tell him. However, I know what he's trying to say. It feels like it's been an eternity since we last saw it in person.
"So," he begins, "have you spoken to Athrun yet today? He's being awfully dismissive, especially when I bring up the discussion of a certain representative. It is kind of… fun to see him so bewildered. Like he doesn't know how he should answer, if at all. He-"
I'm barely paying any attention to what he's saying and it takes me a lot of effort to snap out of it and stop staring down at the dock. It takes me a few seconds to realise Yzak has stopped talking and is scowling at me again.
Yzak leans closer and tightens his brow. "Oi, you're not listening to me, are you? I know what it is you're thinking. You've been all mopey since the announcement about the Archangel. Well suck it up because Miriallia is not going to all of a sudden open one of those doors and jump out. You know she's gone off to be a photographer or whatever it was."
"Freelance photographer, yeah." I'm back to staring at the ship, kind of hoping what he just said will come true. Soon enough I sigh and run my hand through my hair. Sticking to the real world shouldn't be so hard. But every time I close my eyes I see her face and wish things didn't have to have ended between us.
Maybe it was my attitude towards naturals. I have changed a lot since the day we first met, but I suppose there still are some lingering feelings, and I did let them out once in a while. After all, it's a little difficult to think differently about naturals after hearing only bad things about them your whole life. That doesn't excuse me though. Many people grew up thinking the same about coordinators.
I turn toward Yzak and give him a tight smile. "Yeah, sorry. I'm not exactly thinking right at the moment."
He rolls his eyes and makes a melodramatic gesture with his hand. Turning his back on me he makes his way to the door, leaving the over-hanging ledge I stand on that looks out over the vast armoury.
"Just don't get too caught up, Dearka. I know you want her to be here with you but you know just as well as I do that it just didn't work out that way." The door opens and he walks through it before it quietly slides shut behind him.
Re-arranging my collar I take one last glance in the direction of the Archangel and make a decision. I'll get out of here and won't return until the ship has left. Otherwise I'll spend the rest of the week wondering if she really were on it. Then I'd try something stupid, like sneak on board. Oh love, the things you make me do.
I laugh under my breath and hesitantly walk off.
Before long I find myself geared up and sitting at the controls of my new Blaze ZAKU Phantom. I work on the controls and stats, changing them to suit my style. There is nothing worse than being in an advanced mobile suit and having to deal with a system that doesn't conform to your needs and standards. It's especially troublesome trying to configure the system during battle. So I figure I had better finish this before taking off.
Not too long beforehand I had been speaking with Yzak, reassuring him of my plans and getting permission of temporary leave. He said he'd work me twice as hard when I get back, with his usual scowl on show. Maybe his real intention is for me to leave and never come back. It would explain his attitude whenever he felt the need to reprimand me. Which was mighty often I might add.
Attitude aside, we really are great pals. No, really.
I take a drink from the bottle beside me and nearly spit it all over the controls when Yzak all of a sudden opens the hatch.
"Hey, you forgot something important." He bends over and smacks me over the head.
On the verge of hitting him back, I slap my hand to the back of my head and squint at the pain. "Why must you do that all the time? You hit hard, dammit!" I throw the bottle at him and watch him jump out of the way, nearly forgetting how high up the hatch is. He grabs onto the handles and steadies himself, surely considering hitting me again.
Instead he holds one of his hands out at me and lifts an eyebrow. "Now that that's dealt with, how about you hand over what's in your pocket?"
Shocked, I wave my hands about in defeat. "What have you been doing? Stalking me for the past hour or so? Nothing ever gets by you, Commander." I emphasize the last word and reach into my pocket, taking hold of the small box and throw it at him. Yzak catches it without trouble while I feign ignorance. Even though I'd just admitted to taking it.
He smirks. "Indeed." Slowly he swivels and places his foot in the cable hanging from above and presses a button that makes it descend to the ground. The meeting must be getting to him as well, because he's usually a man of many words.
Once he's out of hearing distance I once again return to the self-pity that engrossed me on the balcony from before. I lift my hand from the controls and flex it before smashing it back down, making a cracking sound as it hits the screen.
Be a man, Dearka, I tell myself. There is a very low chance Miriallia will even be here. And what if she is? Are you going to turn and run when she sees you?
I lean backwards into the seat and rest my head, still pounding a little. I'll probably have a headache by tonight. Damn that Yzak. He hadn't been watching me at all. He knew from the very beginning that I'd take it with me and spend every waking moment turning it in my hands.
The box. The box with the ring I'd bought all that time ago and was planning on giving to her. To be honest, I'm glad I didn't have the chance. She probably would have said no.
Placing my hand over my eyes I relax and take a few deep breaths. Then I get out of the Phantom, shut the hatch and speak to the nearby mechanics. After carefully explaining that I'd lost my temper and broken one of the control screens I head for my quarters, pretending they hadn't all just looked at me like I was a little crazy for wrecking a very costly machine, even if only a little.
My plans to leave are gone. I'll stay and I'll wait it out, and if she is here I'll make sure never to let her go again.
It would be funny if all this worry was for nothing, but I have a feeling it won't be.