"Ugin-sensei! Ugin-sensei!"
The wise, majestic, and green dragon known as Ugin-sensei looked up from his desk. He looked over at the doorway of the faculty office and saw a young, pretty Kor girl waving her arms frantically at him.
"Yes, Nahiri?" the wise, majestic, and green dragon said.
"It's terrible Ugin-sensei!" the young, pretty Kor girl known as Nahiri(-chan) exclaimed. "Emrakul-kun, Kozilek-kun, and Ulamog-kun are tearing up the flowers I planted in the school garden!"
Ugin-sensei let out a small gasp. The three Eldrazi siblings were always causing trouble around the school, annihilating everything that didn't give them their lunch money.
"And they said I wasn't cute!"
He let out a bigger gasp.
"That is terrible, Nahiri," the big green dragon said, "I will see to it that those three are disciplined at once."
"Oh thank you, Ugin-sensei!" Nahiri-chan said with the joy only Japanese schoolgirls could express. "I heard from a friend that they were in the science room!"
"The Zendikar laboratory, I see…" Ugin-sensei muttered to himself. The science room, also known as the Zendikar laboratory, was located in the dark, forgotten halls of the old school building. No one studied or taught there after the Rakdos-Kraj fight of '06. It was the perfect place for delinquents such as the Eldrazi siblings to hang out. It was also dark. And forgotten. Only one student could traverse such dark and forgotten halls. And that was—
"Don't worry Nahiri-chan. Ugin-sensei. I'll find them," a handsome and mysterious voice said.
"Kyaaaaa!" cried Nahiri-chan. "It's Sorin-sempai!"
Indeed, Sorin Markov, also known as Sorin-sempai, was standing in the dark corner of the room. How long he had been standing there Ugin-sensei did not know. But that didn't matter. He was here as needed. And he was handsome.
"Perfect timing, Sorin," Ugin-sensei said. "I need you to find the three Eldrazi siblings."
"Didn't I just say I'd do that?" Sorin-sempai snarked back.
"No matter," the big green dragon teacher responded. "Emrakul, Kozilek, and Ulamog have been causing enough trouble this week. We must bring them…to detention."
Everyone in the room (and hallway) gasped.
"I know detention is terrible," the big green dragon detentioner continued, "but they will learn their lesson there. Maybe they'll like it so much that they'll stay there and we can forget about them."
Sorin-sempai and Nahiri-chan nodded.
"Sorin," Ugin-sensei then said, "take Nahiri with you. She must receive her apology from them."
Sorin-sempai nodded a handsome nod while Nahiri swooned. Sorin-sempai mysteriously and handsomely caught her before she fell to the floor.
"Go then," the dragon who was green and a sensei said. "I'll meet you when you've confronted them."
"Of course, Sensei," Sorin-sempai replied before whisking away into the hallway, Nahiri-chan hanging over his shoulder and drooling blissfully. Her nose was bleeding.
Sorin-sempai and Nahiri-chan walked through the school gardens that were just outside the main school building. Nahiri-chan sulked at the sight of her ruined flowers. Her "flowers" were actually rocks, but that fact did not bother her. They were turned over and cracked, and such a sight made her eyes gush with comically large tears.
"Oh, Sorin-sempai," Nahiri-chan cried, "it's so terrible. All of my hard work growing these flowers…"
"They're rocks, Nahiri-chan," Sorin-sempai replied. A ray of sun hit him and tried to make him sparkle, but he glared at the sunlight. It promptly turned over and cracked.
"Oh, Sorin-sempai, I knew you would understand my pain!" Nahiri-chan said joyfully through thick, comically large tears. "I-I…wanted to give one of them to you…"
The silly but pretty Kor girl blushed heavily, and her eyes started to sparkle with little stars.
"Nahiri-chan…" Sorin-sempai said. He looked at her, and his face was handsome and dark. His hair was also white.
"Yes, Sorin-sempai?" Nahiri replied.
"You're better than any rock/flower in terms of beauty and Japanese schoolgirl-ness," he said. He smiled. Not handsomely, though. Gorgeously. Nahiri-chan swooned again, her nose letting out a geyser of blood on the way down.
"Kyaaa, Sorin-sempai…." she tried to squee as she passed out.
In the middle school across town, young Avacyn-chan suddenly felt the urge to pummel her "big brother."
"Onii-chan's flirting with girls again, I just know it! B-baka!"
Griselbrand-kun sighed at the angel's pouting and wondered why she wouldn't like him.
After Nahiri-chan came to her senses and mopped up her blood, she and Sorin-sempai reached the old school building. It was dark and forgotten, and Nahiri-chan was scared, but Sorin-sempai held her hand and she felt better. Kind of. Her nose started to bleed again slightly. As they walked down the dark and forgotten halls, Sorin-sempai mysteriously swept a hand through his hair.
"These cobwebs are getting into my wonderful hair," he complained. He was bishonen, and he needed to remain so. Because he was Sorin-sempai, the prettiest, most handsome man in the school.
"I-it's ok, Sorin-sempai," Nahiri-chan stuttered adorably like the Japanese school girl she was(not). "I think you always look wonderful…"
"Thank you, Nahiri-chan," Sorin said. The rats in the dark corners swooned at the sound of his voice. "I know I always look wonderful too."
Nahiri-chan pouted. He quickly backtracked.
"I mean, I think you look pretty too."
Nahiri-chan's eyes sparkled again as she smiled brightly enough to make light bounce off a nearby mirror.
"R-really Sorin-sempai?" she asked half-hesitatingly and half-eagerly.
Sorin-sempai looked at her and flashed a smile. One of the rats died of a handsome heart attack.
"Really."
"Kyaaaaa!" Nahiri-chan cried out joyfully, Japanese schoolgirl-style. "Sempai thinks I'm pretty!"
The silly but pretty and young Kor girl turned to Sorin and puffed up her cheeks comically.
"Emrakul-kun, Kozilek-kun, and Ulamog-kun didn't think so! They were so mean to me!"
Sorin-sempai opened his mouth to retort against such nonsense, but a terrible, shuddering noise echoed throughout the hallway. Looking to his right, he realized they were standing right in front of the science room's door. He looked at Nahiri-chan who was quivering in fear and back at the closed door. Peering his beautiful yellow eyes, he saw the misshapen, not handsome outlines of the three Eldrazi siblings. He turned to Nahiri-chan again and nodded, throwing in an extra eyebrow wiggle while he was at it. Swiftly, he unnecessarily spun in a circle and threw open the door.
"Emrakul-kun, Kozilek-kun, Ulamog-kun!" the handsome and mysterious vampire shouted. "Apologize to this fair schoolgirl right now and turn yourselves in to Ugin-sensei!"
The three Eldrazi siblings looked up from their Yugioh card game (such disloyalty to their franchise). Ulamog-kun was even holding a Pokémon card for some reason. All three siblings ominously and menacingly…existed at the two intruders. Unfortunately for them, their bullying and annihilating ways had no effect on cute Kor schoolgirls and handsome, dark, and mysterious vampire bishonens. Emrakul-kun put down its hand and floated over to Sorin-sempai. It "stared" at the handsome.
"Well?" Sorin-sempai said.
Emrakul-kun "looked" at Nahiri-chan. For a full fifteen seconds it "gazed" at her in quiet, destructive contemplation. Everyone else in the room (and hallway) felt really awkward.
"We're waiting," Sorin-sempai finally said. Those fifteen seconds were making his beautiful hair frazzle.
Emrakul-kun blushed.
Sorin face faulted.
"O-oh," Nahiri-chan muttered softly. Sorin-sempai looked at her with incredulousness. "S-so, you did those mean things to get my attention?" the pretty Kor girl asked the floating sponge of insanity.
Emrakul-kun "nodded."
"And you didn't mean what you said?" Nahiri-chan added.
Emrakul-kun "shook its head."
"B-BAKA!" Nahiri-chan exclaimed loudly with much hyperbole. She slapped Emrakul-kun as a stream of tears dramatically flew from her eyes. While the Eldrazi blob monster reeled from the pretty Kor girl's attack, its blush grew and became a deeper shade of red. Sorin-sempai gasped as the force of the slap had given him a split end. Kozilek-kun and Ulamog-kun silently wished they were in their sibling's place. As everyone settled down, Nahiri-chan wiped away her many tears and looked up at Emrakul-kun. Her face was slightly rosy. The pink kind of rose, not the red kind.
"You don't have to say or do stuff like that," the pretty Kor girl said quietly. She looked up at the annihilator sponge and it floated a step back. Nahiri-chan's face was stern. For five seconds anyway. She soon made a small smile and Emrakul-kun's blush returned in full force.
"T-thank you," the happy schoolgirl continued. "But…"
The Aeons Torn felt that its heart would be torn. It wasn't wrong.
"I already have someone I like."
Nahiri-chan looked up at Sorin-sempai. He was still slightly offended by the split end she inadvertently had given him, but her prettinesss and Kor-ness won him over. He patted her on the head and a tiny bit of drool leaked from the schoolgirl's mouth. Emrakul-kun suddenly flew into a rage and flipped over the nearest table. It would have shrieked if it had a mouth.
"Kyaaa!" Nahiri-chan cried. Sorin-sempai stood in front of her and glared at the super expensive floating sponge. The other two Eldrazi siblings stood up and marched menacingly towards the Kor-vampire duo (of handsome prettiness).
"That will be enough."
Everyone gasped (except Emrakul-kun) as Ugin-sensei entered the room from the window. He had a stern look on his face. He was also green.
"Emrakul, Kozilek, and Ulamog," he said super seriously.
The three Eldrazi siblings looked at him, defiance on their faces(?). Ugin-sensei breathed deeply and then spoke.
"Detention."
All three Eldrazi siblings fainted.
"Good work you two."
"It was nothing, Ugin-sensei!"
"I told you I could find them."
The three defeaters of Eldrazi bullying cheered and downed their glasses of water. Ugin-sensei wasn't allowed to give the two students anything else or he would have been fired.
"Ugin-sensei, do you really think putting those three on community service duty will really do any good?" Sorin-sempai asked. The water in his cup evaporated from the handsome sound.
"Nahiri here really thinks they aren't so bad. Once they've fixed the garden and tended it for the next…oh, I don't know…ten thousand years, they should be model students," the green, wise dragon sensei replied.
"Emrakul-kun isn't so bad…" Nahiri-chan muttered. She was still slightly blushing.
Sorin-sempai frowned. Thankfully for His Handsomeness, his bishonen brooding was not unnoticed.
"Oh, don't worry Sempai, you're the only bishonen for me!"
Sorin-sempai smiled smugly before Ugin-sensei bonked him on the head. The vampire not so mysteriously gasped as he frantically straightened his hair back into place.
"S-Sempai?" Nahiri-chan meekly asked. Sorin-sempai looked at her with half-curious, half-handsome eyes. "C-can I walk home with you today?"
Sorin-sempai didn't say anything for a moment. After he was done being dramatic, he looked at Nahiri-chan and flashed her a brooding but handsome smile only bishonens can make. Nahiri-chan predictably "kyaaaed". Ugin-sensei rolled his eyes, one wise, the other majestic; both green.
"Sure," Sorin-sempai said (handsomely). "Let's stop by the middle school first though. I need to pick up my 'sister.' I think she'll like you."
