Title: The Loss
Distribution: They all belong to Joss Whedon
Synopsis: After Conner is taken Buffy comes to town to comfort Angel.
Notes: I know it has been done many times but I think I want to give it a try. English isn´t my native tong so sorry for any spelling mistakes.
It is already dark when I arrive at the hotel. The sky is dark without stars and the moon. It is quiet as if the vampires and demons know that tonight isn´t the night for fights. As I enter the hotel I hear them talk softly. "Hello?!" I look around, searching for them. Cordelia and two others come out from what I think is the kitchen. Cordelia looks so lost and hurt. I can see she have been crying. For a moment we stand, just looking at each other but then she crumbles and fall to the ground in tears. I rush to her holding her trying to comfort her. Whispering softly trying to make her feel better. When she stands she sniffles and apologize but I just hug her again and tells her it is okay. "This is Gunn and Fred" she tells me. I nod at them giving them a small smile. "Where is he?" Cordelia points upstairs. "He hasn´t said or eaten anything since..." I nod and begins to walk up to my lovers room.
The room is dark and it screams Angel. Even if I didn't know it was his I would still tell it was. A big king-size bed with red silk sheets. He had always liked the feeling of silk when he slept. In the middle of the room stands a crib. All black from the fire and next to it is he. He sits with a little teddy bear in his hands. Conner's of course. I don´t know if he knows I´m here but I think he does. Quietly I walk over to him and sit down beside him. Taking his large cold hands in mine. We sit like that for a long time. "I´m sorry. I couldn´t come sooner" I say, repeating what he said to me when my mother died. I don´t know what to say. He just looks so hurt and lost. It seems like there is no one home in his eyes. "I.. I dont know what to say. I´m sorry Angel. I wish you could have told me about him. I would have liked to meet him". I look down. Stupid Buffy. This isn't about you. This is about Angel. Angel, who has lost his only son. The one thing he never thought he could have. "I´m sorry. I would have been here to save him, you know. If I had know he was there, I would have done anything to save him." He still isn´t looking at me but I know he listens. "Right now I would give anything to make it all go away. I would give anything to give you back your son." I sigh. "I wish I knew what you are thinking Angel." He still isn´t looking. Once again I sigh and shift my seat. I lift his head up and looks into his eyes. The are empty. "Oh Angel. I love you. You came when I needed you. You held me and were my strength when I was weak. You saved me. You made me. Please. Let me save you now." I can see I´m getting to him. His eyes are getting teary and he looks away but I take his head kiss his tears away. "You don´t have to be strong now Angel. Cause I´m here to be strong for you."
Then he crumbles and falls. He sobs and wail. Screaming and blaming the Powers That Be for taking his son away. He wiggles in pain on the floor and cries some more. Finally it is just tears there is left. He looks at me for the first time since I got here. The emptiness is still there but I can see the crying has done him good. He sniffles and letting the tears fall silently. And I hold him. I will hold him forever and a day. Until he doesn't need me to anymore. Cause that's what Lovers do.
THE END