She made her way across the lawn, stepping around the little flowers that had sprung from the green with her arms out to the side. Plue followed close behind, shivering against the breeze that caused Lucy's skirt to billow out around her thighs. The path next to her felt nothing like the grass beneath her toes, so she abandoned the pavement for now.
It was a Thursday afternoon, with the sky peeping from the passing clouds and the sunrays cascading down to earth, illuminating the white daisies in Plue's arms. Overhead, a scarlet bird followed, circling around their heads. It perched on nearby trees often, though not a single peep was made.
Her shoes clicked on concrete as she stepped back onto the path, and she called out to Plue to make sure it was still near. Lucy beamed at the sight of certain two stones that laid on top of the grass, and she skipped a little faster with Plue at her heels.
As she lept over the few steps, she called them. "Mom, dad, I'm back."
She brushed off a leaf from on top of her father's marble top, running her hand down the smooth surface, then peered up to smile at the bronze plate with his name etched in the center. Plue placed down the first bouquet on the grave next to them, for Layla, and handed the second to Lucy, who gently set it down to her side.
"I… I know it's only been a week, but I had to come again." Lucy spread her legs in front of her, making herself comfortable with Plue climbing onto her lap. She begun again. "How are you mom… dad…? I'm ok, just ok. I think I've stopped crying now. It's gotten hard for me again, but I'm a Heartfilia, a little work won't stop me."
A blond strand of hair grazed her face as a the wind picked up just a bit, fanning out her side pony tail. She didn't have the courage to tell her parents about her underwear modeling just yet, or difficult it's been to drag herself out of bed each morning. It's only been a few months since her friends went their separate paths, leaving Lucy alone with nothing but the ghost of their goodbyes and the promise of "see you later." And yet "later" didn't come for some, even "see you soon" became "later."
"I've been offered a job as an intern. It's a start isn't it? I've always been good with writing, although you guys have never read my stories." A small chuckle escaped her lips, if they ever read her working novel, she'd be mortified. "Things are going to be more busy now, and I don't know when I'll be able to visit again. I haven't touched my draft for days, mom. But the story is still in my heart, like you two… and them…"
It was so similar to the memories that lingered, the precious moments that used to be in reach whenever she spread out her hands to catch them. She lived so close to her friends before they were gone, but now, her apartment felt too big. No one waited for her to come home with cake waiting on the table or where they in her clothes. There was only silence and perhaps the flutter of paper on her desk when she left her window open, hoping that maybe someone would find their way back to her.
"Guess what, dad?" She picked up the bundle of daisies and set them on the grave, rearranging the petals before sitting back down. "I'm going to be a journalist's intern! All of their archives will be open for me, and it will be easier for me to get news clippings. Yukine has been so patient with me, always ready to welcome me to Sabertooth if I ever wanted to join their guild and sending me letters with rumors about the members of F-Fairy Tail. Ah! I don't think I told you this yet, but Wendy made it into Lamia Scale, and Erza is almost half way across the country now. I wish—"
Her voice was caught in her throat, too stubborn to make their way out and to be whispered into the breeze. What did she wish for? What were those words that lingered at the tip of her tongue. She clamped her mouth shut, too afraid of what would come out if she didn't.
Suddenly, the air became a little too cold and the blades of grass became too prickly. Lucy rose to her knees, forgetting Plue who slid off her lap, and crawled in between both her parent's headstones. Her head rested on the top of her mom's stone and she arched her back against the cool rock, though it made her even emptier than before.
"What was I saying before? Ah, my new job. I'll be helping Jason, the young guy who shouts cool at everything, with his articles. We'll be interviewing famous wizards, you know! Maybe even—"
She let out a shaking sigh. It was no use. There was nothing she could do to forget about her friends, her old friends. An involuntary shiver spread over her body, shaking her chest most of all. Lucy brought her hand to it, holding her fist close to her heart that ached. Her lip quivered, though she bit it to keep it steady.
There was a gaping hole from where her most precious people had torn themselves from her, though it seemed like everything important to her would leave eventually. Her first friend, Aquarius was gone. Her little sister, Michelle. Her mom, then her dad. Her new home and her guild. Her guild, Fairy Tail. Natsu. Natsu.
He left without a word, letting the goodbye fall onto a single piece of paper that promised her that he would become more powerful. Natsu was in her room just moments before she came in; the window was still open, fresh from his escape. After discovering the letter and deciphering his chicken scratch, she flung the door open and flew down the staircase. She chased after him, with no sign of his wild pink hair or his pure white scarf in sight, and yet she kept running. After that month, she found that she was truly alone now, alone in a world too big to fight by herself.
Her eyes started to sting. It reminded her of her lonely days at her mansion when she was a young girl, trapped with only a doll and a spirit who was always less than thrilled to see her. Her story started out with only her as the main character, and even after meeting her companions, they still moved on, leaving her in their dust.
Lucy leaned over onto her father's stone, letting the top of her head tap the side as she crouched over the grass. She squeezed her eyes shut, enclosing them in darkness.
"I'm sorry, I lied again. I didn't stop. I'm sorry. I didn't stop crying after all."
The breeze died down to nothingness while Plue hugged one of her legs, though she couldn't feel anything except for the wetness that ran down her cheeks. The red bird swooped down onto the headstone, singing of a memory from so long ago. The sun became hidden again behind a large gray cloud as her tears fell like rain.