Neku knew things were bad. He knew things were bad when he saw his own blood spill onto the ground after a particularly vicious taboo noise sliced into his arm. Sure, he had gotten hurt since the Game started, but during these past four, almost five whole days with Joshua, they had gone without any kind of serious injury. Joshua was good, and Neku had improved, and it seemed that although they were more of a challenge, even Taboo noise was nothing to them.

But this time it it hadn't been so easy.

Perhaps it was that they had rushed in trying to save the Reaper, perhaps it was that there were more than usual, or perhaps it was simply that they weren't as invincible as either of them may have thought they were; regardless of the reason, Neku was now clutching at his upper arm, blood seeping through his fingers.

Before he could make another move, or even had time to think about it, and almost blinding light shot down and in the next instant, the Noise was no more. Neku should have, perhaps, been thinking about what the hell just happened, but he had more pressing matters at the forefront of his mind.

"Joshua," he said, turning around so quickly he made himself dizzy. "Joshua, are you -"

But Joshua was already falling forward, and Neku ran over faster than he thought possible, catching him by his shoulders. "Shit, Joshua! Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Joshua said, though his voice had nearly cracked, and both his arms were wrapped tightly around his abdomen.

"Like hell you are." Despite his harsh words, his tone was anything but accusatory - it was worried, maybe even frantic. "Come on."

A bit weakly, Joshua shook his head. "I'm fine." Without warning he stepped back away from Neku, but he instantly went into a stumble, almost falling again until Neku rushed forward and caught him once more. His gaze moved downward, catching sight of the crimson that had begun to stain Joshua's shirt.

Neku bit his tongue, trying to force his voice to come out as evenly as possible. "Come on. I think I have a healing pin on me."

"Use it on yourself," Joshua said as he gave into - or perhaps didn't have the strength to protest - Neku's guidance away from the main street.

"I'm fine, Josh." Sure, his arm burned like hell right now but he would be fine. And Josh would be too.

As Neku lowered Joshua into a sitting position against the wall of the alleyway, he felt his heart stop.

It was then, as Joshua's torso was bleeding out and his face was nearly white and his breaths were strained to make even the shallowest gasps, that it struck Neku that Joshua might not be okay. Despite how he acted, how he talked, how he fought off Noise like they were nothing, like it was just a game, despite how he did absolutely anything and treated it like nothing more than a whim to keep him from boredom, Joshua was not invincible. Joshua was a person. Neku knew that - he had seen in during these past few days, when sometimes Joshua would giggle without any kind of flippancy about it, when Joshua would pout when he lost at Tin Pin, when Joshua would - Neku thought - seem almost protective, over him, sometimes; always focusing on Noise attacking Neku before dealing with his own, always keeping close to him in a fray. Neku knew that Joshua was just a person, yet still, seeing him like this, bleeding, vulnerable, possibly mortally injured, seemed unreal. It left Neku almost shaking, the only thing keeping him calm, or pseudo-calm, was the fact that he had to be. He had to be, to help Joshua. Joshua was a necessity. The idea of not having Joshua was something he couldn't think about.

"Let me see," Neku said, getting onto his knees in front of Joshua and reaching for his shirt.

"Idiot," Joshua replied, swatting Neku's hand away as best he could, before placing his own on the wound on Neku's arm, looking at it intently. "This isn't something minor."

"Dammit, Joshua!" Neku pulled his arm away, pain stinging along its entirety. "At least I can stand! Let me see!" He reached for Joshua's shirt again, and this time Joshua full on slapped his hand away.

"Neku, stop it! Just stop it! I'm fine!" Joshua's whole body shook, as he brought his legs closer to his chest, head turning down. "I'm fine!"

Neku froze. If the situation didn't feel surreal before, it definitely did now. Joshua was still shaking, and with every passing moment he seemed to be curling further into himself. Every other second or so he'd raise one of his hands a bit, before gripping it back against his leg, as if about to do or say something but then deciding against it, as if he was completely torn apart. His palm was red, coated in Neku's blood from when he had touched his arm. It was probably not the only way in which Neku's blood was on Joshua's hands. And yet, this thought didn't cross Neku's mind at all, nor the fact that if Joshua died, he'd follow soon after. No, he needed Joshua here for other reasons. The thought of not having Joshua was something he couldn't even think about. In just these days past he felt connected to Joshua, more so than anyone else he had ever met. And Neku had, honestly, gotten quite attached to him. His giggle, his deep, beautiful violet eyes, his silky hair, his sarcastic quips and the way he'd sometimes go on about some historic bullshit. And the way he put things Neku had been feeling for years into words. Joshua understood him. He was the only person who did, fully.

And in turn, Neku understood him - and he understood that Joshua's tone wasn't angry, but panicked and hurried - as if he was saying these things not because they were true, but because he was trying to convince himself they were. He understood that this was probably what Joshua despised, what Joshua absolutely hated more than anything - the fact that they, that he, was vulnerable, and he couldn't do anything about it.

"Listen," Neku said, scooting closer, placing his hands on Joshua's shoulders. "You're going to be fine. I'm going to be fine. We're both going to be fine." His words came out softer and more calm than Neku thought he was capable of, and Joshua's body shook a little, just a little, less. "My arm stings, but it's not as bad as it looks. But you have to let me see you. Okay?"

It took a few moments - a few agonizing, terrible moments where Neku's heart was pounding loudly against his chest and the thought that Joshua could stop breathing at any second started to creep into his mind - but Joshua slowly lowered his legs away from himself, slowly pulled his arms away. Without wasting a second Neku pulled Joshua's shirt up, now quite wet and nearly dripping with blood.

It was about as bad as Neku thought, he guessed; the actual wound was hard to see, and the fact that blood was still coming from it at a steady rate sent fear running through his mind, but the fact that Joshua was still conscious meant it probably wasn't as bad as it looked. Yes. Surely. Neku looked back up at him, and saw his eyes starting to flutter shut.

"Stay with me, okay?" Neku said, putting every effort forth to keep his voice steady. "Stay awake. I'm going to heal you, so you need to talk to me and tell me if it feels any better. Okay?"

He hurried himself along, perhaps too scared to look back up and see if Joshua was indeed still awake. He held his palms above the wound, steadying his hands as best he could. He had only ever used this pin on minor injuries, what if it wasn't enough? Moreover, he had also had only used it on himself, what if it didn't work on other people? Neku's heart was racing, his throat was dry and his hands shook. No, it would work. It had to. It had to, it had to it had to -

He swallowed, steadied his hands, closed his eyes and concentrated. He could feel the psyche coming forth, but even without looking he knew it wasn't enough, there wasn't enough power. He couldn't focus - his mind kept flashing into the image of Joshua like this, sitting unmoving in a pool of his own blood, or the image of Joshua's body fading away into static and nothingness as Neku held onto him, trying desperately to keep him here, with him -

Neku's eyes felt hot and wet suddenly, his heart going so fast he felt like it might explode, this was the one time, dammit, the one time above all else that he just had to focus, that's all he had to do -

Distantly, he felt Joshua's hand weakly on his forearm, this time not in an attempt to push him away, but keep him close.

Neku took a deep breath and steadied himself once more. Right now, there was only him and Joshua, and one thing he had to do.

A second later he felt the power rushing through his hands, felt the psyche pouring forth. A full minute passed, and Neku lowered his hands and opened his eyes, completely drained.

Relief washed over him like a tidal wave - the bleeding had stopped and the wound was much smaller. Joshua was probably still in pain, but he could last until Neku's psyche recharged itself. More importantly, Joshua's eyes were open, if barely, and his breathing was fairly steady.

"You're really something with those psyches," Joshua said, his voice quiet and a bit strained.

Neku found himself fighting the urge to throw himself forward and pull Joshua close, to feel that, for a fact, he was here and he was alright, to keep Joshua in his arms until he was back to his annoying, smug self. But he only scooted next to Joshua, breathing a heavy sigh of relief. "Rest. Okay? Don't worry. I'll keep watch for a little bit."

Joshua was silent, and Neku looked over at him; his eyes were fixed on no place in particular, but they were dark, something beyond self-frustration behind them; he brought his knees to his chest again, his fingers curling so tightly into the fabric of his jeans that it almost hurt to look at.

Neku placed one of his hands on Joshua's, and felt it relax a bit, and more than that, felt Joshua's analytic gaze fall upon him.

"I'm glad you're alright," Neku said, only meeting Joshua's eyes for a second. "Now rest for a few."

It took a few moments, but eventually Joshua leaned into Neku, his head resting on his shoulder. Neku felt warmth spread through his body, again fighting back the urge to wrap his arms around the other.

"Thank you," Joshua said, barely audible.

Neku only squeezed his hand.

"You're welcome, partner."

originally i wasn't planning on posting anything i filled on the kink meme anywhere else, but i thought this one turned out okay, i guess.